Chapter 397: Swapping Slum and Scum

“Good afternoon, David. I hear that you want to save the city the trouble of placing a lien on your property to cover our costs to find the skeletons in your closet,” an older, soft-spoken man said. “A transaction of this nature is highly unusual, which is why Janet got us involved. You not being eighteen drastically complicates matters. One block from your property, we have a three-story building that the city took possession of when they failed to pay three years of back taxes. By state law, the previous owner had one year to pay the back taxes, penalties, and interest, but has failed to do so. I understand your urgency to dump your property, so we have an amicable solution to help us both out. I will allow Irving to provide you the details.”

After introducing himself, Irving said, “The building in question also has a history of its own, but nothing even in the same ballpark as yours. Of the three stories and basement, the top two have been everything from offices to apartments to gymnasiums. Currently, they are back to being apartments so unsafe that they got condemned when we took possession of the property. The main level had also been many things. Why are we discussing this place at all? Well, many of us liked your restaurant, even if we couldn’t afford to eat there very often on our government salaries. This property we are discussing had the main level transformed into a large restaurant. It lasted two months before it closed down without any reason. The building owner was concerned about foul play because the rent and estimated utilities were paid a year in advance. When the forensic team was called to investigate, they found the place impossibly clean. There was not a sign of anyone or anything having been in that space. They didn’t even find a hair in the nook between the cushions in the booths. Places always have something for them to find, didn’t have anything. Not even any bugs were present. Everything in that restaurant was bought new and is the top of the line.”

“If it is such prime property, why are we even discussing it?” I asked since he never told me.

“I was getting to that, David. I’m a bit long-winded, so please be patient,” Irving joked. “The basement of the building is stuffed floor to ceiling with all manners of things someone collected over decades that they stored down there. Our fire marshal declared the building a fire risk and condemned it. Even that wouldn’t make it worthy of discussing. You see, the place is an eyesore with the people and businesses demanding we do something about it. By our estimations, it would cost the city three times what digging the bones out of your property’s unknown sub-basement is going to cost us. Our city council has refused to approve the budget to get the two upper levels and basement to code. They refuse to permit the sale. Your problem plot of land got zoned in an area where we collect property taxes three times ours. We have a proposition.”

As incredible as it sounded, I ran it past Elena’s dad and my parents to ensure I wasn’t getting in over my head. I owned the restaurant free and clear. The deed for the property was on file here in the building. I provided lunch for the entire office while we hammered out the details. Karwin was very interested in what my dad called old-fashioned horse-trading. According to Paula, everything was done legally. She looked over the contracts from home and made a few minor tweaks to cover everyone’s butts.

Right around two in the afternoon, we had completed everything. No money had changed hands when the bean counters got done running the numbers, other than the back taxes and interest. I had agreed to bring the building up to code. They would then have it appraised, and I would pay taxes on that much higher value, but not until I had finished the work on the building.

“If you can get the basement cleared out and show plans to gut the upper two floors, I believe we can get the fire marshal to come into re-inspect the building to see if he feels it is no longer a fire risk. That will let you get the utilities turned back on. I don’t know anything about the food-service business, but as of the last report, you could re-open in your new location as soon as you can stock it. Janet can get the keys for the building and grab some building inspectors to meet you down there in half-of-a-hour,” the soft-spoken man said. “This is going to piss off the city council, but they can’t argue with the numbers. It didn’t cost the city a dime, and we got a significantly higher value property in return. If it indeed already has a tunnel system, as reported, that is up to code, the value increases even more.”

Karwin suggested that we meet Janet and the building inspectors in an hour instead.

“Do you know how hard it is to get government workers to show up anywhere at a set time? I don’t want to push my luck here. I think I got a sweet deal and dumped off that toxic asset I got from your family,” I told her.

She urged me to get in the car and head anywhere we wouldn’t be disturbed.

I have just the place.

I had a condo a block from the building I just got in the swap for whatever reason.

Karwin was naked before I even closed the door, not that she had all the much to take off anyway. After she raced to the bathroom, she tried to get me undressed. That ended when she got my dick free from my boxer briefs to slide it into her mouth. Once I had a boner, Karwin tried to figure out the logistics to get me in her pussy. The nearby sofa provided the perfect spot.

She did her best to get me lined up as she said, “I don’t even have a clue if this is a safe time to have sex or not. I’m not ready to start popping out kids like Corwin, but I know I need to get fucked. It isn’t like the staff doesn’t have various natural methods of resolving that problem. My older sister was a genius in some areas but dumb as a post in others. I found out from my mother that my oldest sister had gotten pregnant too many times to count. My sister believed that she was just irregular when she got her period two to three weeks late. Even my crazy brothers, cousins, and uncles all agreed that my older sister should never be allowed to have children. That didn’t stop them from letting her fuck them into the ground when the need hit her. Please, David, I know it is technically my second time, but I don’t count earlier as sex as much as trying my pussy on your dick for size. I don’t know what to do, but we both know that you do. The negotiation was unlike anything I’d ever seen before. That is the first deal that looked shady and yet turned out to be above board. You have a turn-key restaurant, and my pussy is aching for what I now know you can soothe.”

“You are going to have to suck my dick hard again if you keep talking,” I told her as I lined up and started into her slippery cave.

We only had time for her to wash out most of the cum in her pussy before we needed to rush over to my new building.

Janet gave Karwin a knowing smile and then blushed when she realized that her nipples were hard, and she made the quick adjustment of her pants so that she didn’t have a wet spot start to show.

When the guys from the building inspector’s office and the city’s civil engineers got here, we could go inside. The two top floors had their stairway on the side, so we went up there first. All I could see was that the places were old with chipping paint and needing some regular maintenance, but that was all. That turned out to be what the building inspectors said after the civil engineers certified that the structure was sound.

Everyone was surprised at the restaurant. The furniture looked like someone came in with a house-sized vacuum bag sealer to put them in air-tight plastic bags. We found someone had done the same in the kitchen area, including the racks on the walk-in cooler and freezer. I don’t know how they managed to seal the cups and dishes without breaking them. We couldn’t find anything but dust.

In the basement, what I expected wasn’t what we got. Yes, someone had packed it floor to ceiling, wall to wall with boxes. The place in my head pinged me to check the one closest to me, so I pulled it down to open it up. Inside were six of the original GI Joe still in their original boxes, two Louis Vuitton Steiff Bears, vacuum-sealed, a signed Micky Mantle baseball card certified in mint condition, and many other things. Everything we found was in perfect condition and accompanied by unquestionable certificates of authenticity. Some had a full accounting of each time the item changed hands. Another box had original factory replacement parts for classic cars that the people restoring the vehicles had to get custom made because the parts no longer existed. These two had been vacuum-sealed and dated as to when they were packed.

“Holy shit,” Janet said before apologizing for her language. “This is just too amazing.”

In the box was a list of comics. It had one from every printing of every Spiderman comic printed up until Stan Lee died. Each pouch contained the autographed comic, a picture of Stan Lee signing it, and the autographed front page of the newspaper shown in the eight by ten photo. One of the letters stated that the comic in the associated pouch was taken off the printing line, signed by Stan Lee on the spot, and immediately sealed up. That one had a series of photos showing what the letter stated.

“Wow! I have heard about this one, but I have to read it!” I said as I made it appear that I was going to open it.

I got a chorus of “NO!” screamed at me.

“I can only guess that some eccentric person was renting this basement out. If it is filled with stuff as we found in these first boxes, it is not junk,” I explained. “I need to take a picture of a few of these and then call someone.”

I sent the pictures to dad to ask if he wanted anything like this that I found for him, mom, April, or my siblings. Then I also sent them to Elena’s dad before I called him.

I explained about the swaps and then asked, “There is a lot of collectible stuff, and even some old car parts preserved down here in the basement of the building. I’m guessing maybe ten to fifteen thousand square feet. What do I do with this stuff? Is there somewhere to donate it that won’t just auction it off for a quick buck?”

“I suggest you have it all moved to a secured, climate-controlled warehouse somewhere. Some of those items can be worth millions of dollars. If you want, I can get someone there within the hour that can get this stuff moved out quickly,” Elena’s dad explained.

My implant pinged me that the man-in-the-machine’s androids were already on the way. They would take all this stuff and get an inventory going.

“Thanks for the advice. I think I may have someone I can call. I appreciate your advice,” I told Elena’s dad and hung up.

I came back to where everyone was standing in the basement to say that I found out what I needed. I confirmed with the government officials is that if I got the basement cleaned out, I could have the Fire Marshal come to do their inspection. If all went well, they would clear me to get the utilities turned back on to get people there to start setting up the restaurant.

Karwin and I hung out after the city people left. We walked through the apartments on the upper two floors when we heard the trucks pull up outside. Male and female androids, with various skin and hair colors, repeated trips to take the boxes from the basement into the vehicles.

Another group came in wearing safety vests and hard hats who asked for the keys to the upper two floors.

“David? The boss sent us down here and said to find a guy looking like a linebacker with a cute girl in a ballcap. You fit the bill,” he told me. “If you have no problem with it, we want to get a jump on the work orders for the upper floors before we have to quit at five.”

I let him know that plan worked for me as long as they didn’t break any noise ordinances. Their work was going to tear out everything down to bare concrete walls and posts. All the wiring and plumbing needed to be up to code. They had blueprints for the two floors to guide their demolition work.

Karwin and I headed back to my house.

When we came in from the garage, April came up to Karwin, held up her arms, and waited for Karwin to pick her up.

“Hi, Corwin’s Aunt,” April announced as she hugged Karwin.

I told Karwin, “Don’t ask. April is very perceptive. I can’t even begin to know how she knows who you are.”

“Day-id! She looks like Corwin’s mommy.” April stated like a well-known fact.

My parents came in, carrying my sleeping sister and brother. We talked over the things that had gone on while they had been off at Elena’s dad’s resort. Dad couldn’t believe that I wasn’t pulling his leg about the stuff in the basement. I gave him the details about the building swap.

“The city got the better end of the deal. They have caught hell about that blight of a building. Our city council can’t pull their head out of their butts,” dad told me. “Good call on dumping the property. You wouldn’t want the clientele that would come to eat there if you rebuilt it.”

When Karwin and I went up to shower off the dust from the basement and building, Karwin asked, “Why didn’t they ask who I was or my name?”

“Because they learned that it was best not to ask. If David’s parents needed to know, David would tell them, or you would,” Camden said. “Right now, David is going to get the nasty poop of his sons before scrubbing off whatever Gabriella got all over her. They are his kids. He can wash them.”

I washed both boys and handed them to Camden as Gabriella delighted herself, pushing my dick around.

She couldn’t tell me what she got all over her, but it took Karwin and I both to get it off her, finally. I got Gabriella wrapped up in a towel while Karwin got dried off. She found clothes in my room for Gabriella, so she dressed her while I dried off. I threw on some boxers, shorts, and a t-shirt. I went to get Karwin some panties before taking her into the girl’s clothes closet.