Chapter 18

Again, I was not to directly witness Suzette's depravity. This was because it took place on a Sunday, the only day Jenny and Sally could arrange another picnic, to which both Jane and Suzette could be invited. The guest list made it quite clear to me that they intended much more than simply eating outdoors. It was well thought out, because in addition to snaring poor Suzette, the trap was also set for Nigel.

Suzette didn't have to invite Stephan. That was arranged for her. But the other three got together to decide what other males to invite. Jane wanted to be with Charley again. Sally had a sweet spot in her heart for Hugh. Jenny had confessed her interest in Nigel to The Mistress, who urged her to explore that interest. She also reminded Jenny that he was a lusty fellow, and well endowed.

Nigel was, in fact, the only person whose willing participation in such a venture was uncertain. He kept to himself, for the most part, and didn't socialize with the others. Of course none of them had really socialized with each other prior to Mistress Penelope's arrival, for that matter. And if he declined, then Jenny could always share Hugh with Sally. They had developed a fondness for sharing a man. Had I peeked more often on nights when I "knew nothing was planned" I would have known they had also developed a fondness for Sapphic play, another detestable practice the Mistress introduced into their lives. When I finally got to observe such disgusting behavior, and was forced to watch them sup from each other's sexual cups, or lovingly suckle nipples, preparing them for a baby's lips, I was duly shocked. I was also shocked at how long they were willing to please each other this way before they were finally sated. When I realized how many times I had missed seeing this, I had to alter my surveillance schedule, to ensure I kept better track of their moral decay. That their immorality infected me was plain when, each time I observed this lesbian play, my manly penis objected by standing up and wishing to be used to show them what sort of thing they should be playing with.

But I digress. Nigel apparently accepted Jenny's invitation. Of course he would have been a fool to reject such a comely lass' interest. I knew not how often he was able to assuage his sexual frustrations, but if memory serves, I have never heard of a man who has fretted about suffering an overabundance of sex.

Then again, with Mistress Penny around, that became a distinct possibility.

As I later heard, everything was quite honorable in the beginning. The girls assembled in the garden, loaded down with the baskets and blankets they had procured. The men arrived soon after, Hugh being last to appear, panting after his run from the village. He had finished his work and returned to be his father's apprentice, but even Aldo didn't work on Sunday. Soon, the girls were skipping along, and it was the boys who were loaded down.

If the girls seemed to know where they were heading, the boys did not notice it. Only one boy had a pre-planned role to play, and that was Stephan. He had prosecuted his prior part in this grand play of Her Ladyship's with alacrity and skill, and seemed to know no more than the other boys. He spent much of his time glancing at Suzette, making sure she noticed he was doing so, but not being overbearing about it.

Jenny finally pointed to a swale that was dry and grassy, this time of year. It was bordered by copses of trees, widely spaced, which could provide shade if the sun became tiresome.

The blankets were spread, with the edges touching, such that they had a large surface upon which to sit or lie, as the mood suited them. The men were instructed to remove their boots, to keep the blankets clean.

"Sit by me," said Jenny to Nigel. Without a word, he sank to his knees beside her and then rolled onto his backside, with his muscular legs folded before him.

Sally looked coquettishly at Hugh, who grinned and fell to lie beside her, supporting his head on one hand.

"Charley!" called Jane. "How is that little piebald foal you showed me the other day? Is it still limping?" He sat down and they began to discuss the horse.

Only Stephan and Suzette were still standing. She looked shy, while he looked uncomfortable. I wish I'd been there to see it. The boy has a talent for acting, and could join one of the traveling troupes, according to Jenny.

He edged his way over to Suzette, and spoke softly.

"Thank you for coming," he said.

"You're welcome," she said, most likely an automatic phrase that fell from her lips without thought.

"I so hoped you would," he said.

She pinked up. It was the first evidence she had, other than what her Lady had said, that suggested he had real interest in her.

"Would you like to sit down?" he asked.

She nodded, and knelt gracefully. She folded her legs off to one side, somehow staying upright, even though she looked off center. Her bare feet protruded from her skirt. The bottoms were leathery and brown, as if stained with walnut juices.

He bent over and selected two sandwiches, a pear, and a bunch of grapes from the cache of victuals, before sitting beside her. He held out a sandwich to her, and when she took it, he bit lustily into his own. He chewed quietly, looking around the swale, and at the others, but ignoring Suzette.

She took that opportunity to examine him. She had seen him many times, of course, as he went about the place. From the rise behind the manor where her drying lines were stretched, she could see the paddock, and if someone was training a horse there, she could observe. That was primarily where she had seen Stephan, but it was too far away to see him well. She had never, in fact, wished to see him more closely. He was simply Stephan, one of the boys who worked with the horses.

Now, though, as her eyes looked him over, there was more to him. His unruly shock of butter colored hair made him look like he had just gotten off a horse from a wild run. His nose was pug, and turned up a bit at the tip, but she thought that interesting, because no one else she knew had a nose like that. His shoulders were broad. Her eyes flicked to the others present. Only Nigel's shoulders were broader than Stephan's, but of course he was much older.

As her eyes returned to Stephan, she found him staring right at her. His eyes shifted away instantly, as if he were ashamed he'd been caught looking. The toughness that lay under her soft exterior ... that toughness that had helped her survive when she had been so small, and so young, and so alone ... came to the fore.

"Am I so ugly, then?" she asked.

His eyes snapped back to her.

"What?" he asked, clearly confused.

"Am I so sad to look upon that you jerk your eyes away in disgust?"

"Of course not!" he gasped. "What madness makes you think that?"

"Did you not just jerk your gaze away from me?"

He blinked. He had meant only to let her know he was looking, not upset her.

"I didn't want to seem overbearing," he said.

"Looking at me is being overbearing?"

He shrugged, helplessly. When he had been offered the role of welcoming little Suzette into the fold, he had jumped at the chance. She looked so sweet, and so frail most of the time. He imagined himself, bearing her to the ground, thrusting hard, filling her with his juices. Not that he wanted to hurt her, but the others seemed to be more in control than he ever felt. He knew that was not so. He knew that Her Ladyship had chosen him for this because she had faith in his abilities. He was quite proud of that.

But everything that had happened so far in his short, amazing sexual life, had been based on the desires of others.

"It would pain me if, by staring at you, it upset you," he said.

She popped two grapes into her mouth, and then looked at him while she chewed. She swallowed, and then spoke.

"Is it true that you asked Her Ladyship's permission to court me?"

He shrugged again. "I suppose." Somehow he conveyed both indifference and interest with that motion.

"What does that mean?"

"She asked me who I would marry. I hadn't thought about that, and was taken by surprise. She waited for my reply, so I thought of the girls I knew. When I thought about being wed to you ... I don't know. It's hard to explain."

"Try," she ordered.

He frowned, took a bite of the pear, chewed and swallowed. "I do not wish you to be unhappy with me, but I compared you to the others."

"And?"

"Well, take Jenny there." They both looked to see Jenny smiling and laughing, sitting close to Nigel, who had an uncharacteristic smile on his face. Nigel rarely smiled. "She is comely, and all, but she has many highborn behaviors. Sometimes she can be a bit stuffy. I imagined she might nag me to act more gentlemanly."

He reached for some grapes, popped one in his mouth, chewed and then went on.

"And Sally is sweet, but I know her to be a bit of a hussy. I am not a handsome sort, and if a hussy married me, might not her eye wander from our marriage bed?"

"There is nothing amiss with your visage," said Suzette.

"My thanks to you," he said, smiling, "but there is a mirror in the stables, and I groan whenever I look into it. Regardless, considering Marie, she is afraid of her own shadow, and would never talk to me. That left you and Jane. That choice was easy."

"Easy?"

"Jane is a nice sort, but is plain. You are beautiful."

She blinked. She felt wary, but could not discern why. This was the first time she'd spoken more than ten words to Stephan, or had them returned in such large quantities. She had no way to gauge his words. She looked for the tensions around the eyes and lips, that sometimes announced someone was prevaricating, but did not see evidence of that.

"Tell me how you know Sally is a hussy," she said.

It hadn't been planned this way, but suddenly Stephan was given the opportunity to talk about how Her Ladyship felt about young people who were "unprepared to enter a matrimonial state," and her views on why practice before marriage was worth much more than fumbling around unhappily after the vows were exchanged. Little by little, he let her drag more and more bits of information from him about the things that he had seen, and done, things that had happened, and who had been involved. He hadn't meant to tell her so much ... or in so much detail. Finally he fell silent.

She had said little while he spoke, only asking for a point of clarification here, or asking a question there. At other times she had simply repeated what he had said, which somehow urged him to explain in further detail. The cunningness required to stay alive as a waif, served her without thought during his tale. She had heard men boast before. His Lordship boasted quite often when he was in his cups. But Stephan's tale had none of that quality about it. The telling excited him. She could see that in the bulk that formed in the front of his pants. She had never been touched by a man herself. She had seen to that quite carefully after she had heard the screaming, and shouting, and laughter that came from the private spaces where some men took a woman, and some women took a man. It hadn't sounded pleasant, even when there was laughing.

Now, for the first time, the kind of events that had been cloudy and vague in her mind, were now much clearer ... and less distasteful.

"After hearing your tale, methinks you are the one who is a hussy," she commented.

"It was all new and fascinating for me," he said, defending himself. "I admit the fun of being with different girls was alluring. Each is unique, and each must be stimulated in a different manner to please her. That is a challenge worth taking on, but it is also much work. Would it not be so much easier, and so much nicer, to get to know one woman well enough to satisfy her without conscious thought?"

"So you would forsake the others ... for me?"

She saw the first hint of deception show on his face. But then he frowned, and his eyes stared without mendacity into hers.

"I don't know, to be honest. I have never been married. I'm not sure I know what love is, or if it can snare me. Her Ladyship says all of us should explore the aspects and attributes of many, before we decide to settle down. I suppose that's what I am doing."

"So I am just one more pretty doxie for you to conquer, while you try to discover whether you can love?" Her eyes flashed.

"I think that unfair," he said, and she saw honesty on his face. "Do I find you pleasing to look upon? Yes. Does the thought of being intimate with you excite me? Most surely. Do I think you some brainless wench, upon whom I can work my will? Absolutely not. I think you are pretty, and steady, and strong. In just these few minutes I find you are not brainless by any stretch of the imagination. Would I find out if I can love you ... and if you can love me?" He blinked several times. "Yes. I think I would like that very much."

"And how would you propose we determine that?"

He shrugged again. "I know not. All I have learned is how to sport with a woman. That is most delightful. I'll not lie about that. But I know nothing of how to talk to a woman, or befriend her."

She laughed then. It was the first time anyone had seen Suzette laugh. I wish I had been there.

"Oh, you talk quite well. I think you are a rogue, but as you profess to find me interesting, I must admit I find you interesting as well."

"What, then, shall we do?" he asked.

She looked around at the others. Jane was kissing Charley, though it seemed a fairly chaste kiss, with only their lips touching. Nigel's attention was solely on Jenny, who was still animated in her movements as she spoke. Sally was feeding Hugh grapes, and his hand was on her knee. These people, sans Nigel, had been participants in the tale Stephan had told, a tale of lasciviousness and prurience such as she had never imagined in her life. And yet, they looked so normal here, in this place.

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Penelope, Mistress of the Manor

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