Chapter 1

Chantell woke up on Saturday in a gloomy mood. It was the first official day of summer break, and she knew she had the entire summer of being cooped up in the house to suffer through. Earlier in the year her dad had threatened to ground her for the entire summer if she didn't bring her grades up, meaning no car, no freedom, and therefore, no fun.

She found out the hard way that he meant every word.

It wasn't that she didn't try—she absolutely did—but trying and succeeding were two very different things--especially in Algebra. As a matter of fact she had succeeded in every other class, but that one. She had brought them all up to A's and B's accept for that one class, which she received a D+. She knew that the D wasn't acceptable, but she had hoped that he wouldn't lighten the grounding after seeing the rest of the grades came up. He didn't, and she was stuck for the summer.

This would have been her first summer with a driver's license, and she had looked forward to making good use of it. She had planned on getting out, getting a job, and proving something to herself. She had also planned on living a little—experimenting some—maybe finding a guy and starting something. She would have to do that part behind her parents back, but what they didn't know wouldn't hurt them.

Her parents were strict in that regard. In their minds having a boyfriend meant getting pregnant and ruining your life. She didn't want to get pregnant, but the idea of doing the things a girl had to do to get pregnant ... Now that was a different story. She was definitely into figuring out her sexuality. Just because her parents were up tight about it, didn't mean she had to be.

She held out her hand and looked at it with a frown. "I guess it's just you and me for the summer," she said. "What else is new?"

For the longest time that had been enough. As a matter of fact she usually enjoyed her fantasies and found herself enjoying them more and more frequently—normally just before she went to bed at night--but not always then. Sometimes she would catch herself just before a shower, in the shower, or just when the mood struck her. It wasn't all the time, but as the summer approached and her anticipation of doing it for real approached, the frequency of her fantasies grew.

"Now would be as good a time as any," she thought to herself, slipped her hand down into her panties, spread her legs and tried to relax her way into fantasy land.

She pictured herself with Thomas Silver. He was the high school football hero that every other girl in her school wanted just as bad as she did. She thought about how she would let him get to second base and further if she got the chance. She pictured how the sun would reflect off of the sweat as it glistened on his muscled frame and tanned body as he descended onto her from above. She imagined spreading her legs for him and allowing him to kiss and lick the places that a woman wanted to be kissed and licked.

None of it was working for her now though.

That static electricity feeling wasn't coming to her lower region the way it always had in the past. It was as if she were toying with the food on her plate, but had no intention of eating it. Her appetite just wasn't' there. With the thrill of knowing that it was actually going to happen for real being gone—the idea seemed to be unappealing--as if thinking of Tom, and knowing that it would be someone else that would give their virginity to him, and not her, killed the mood.

"Nothing," she said out loud, and she got up and out of her bed with a huff. She grabbed a fresh pair of underwear, a shirt, and a pair of shorts and headed toward the bathroom that she shared with her younger brother. She didn't bother to dress, because she didn't have to pass through a hall way. Nobody would be able to see her so there was no point.

She walked into the bathroom, and set her clothes on the sink. She was about ready to turn the shower on when she noticed that the door leading to Jay's bedroom was cracked open.

"Dammit Jay," she muttered under her breath, and she made the final few steps to his door.

She was about to close it the rest of the way when she saw movement by the far wall in his room.

She nosily peeked through to see what her brother was up to, and immediately wished she hadn't.

He was standing in front of the mirror that was mounted on the back of his closet door. The mirror covered half of the door and was long enough and low enough that he could look at himself and see all the way down to his waist.

Her first instinct was to quickly and quietly shut the door the rest of the way, and she almost did just that. He was doing something though, and it took her a second to figure it out, even though the thought should have hit her right away.

He was watching himself in the mirror as he stroked himself. Her jaw dropped as her brain finally wrapped itself around what he was doing. As soon as it did, however, the forward part of her brain screamed at her to slam the door shut, and to do it pronto. The last thing in the world she should be doing was watching her brother masturbate. How would she feel if the tables were turned? Hmmm?

Horrified ... That's how she'd feel.

She couldn't though. She couldn't close the door, because even though he was stroking himself it didn't actually look like he was masturbating. The motions were there, but they weren't fluid. He wasn't doing it the way that she thought a guy would do it. At least it wasn't the way that she would do it for a guy if she had the chance. She couldn't close the door because her curiosity was up, but there was another reason too.

He was hung.

That's right. Her fourteen year old brother was not proportionate in size. He was a descent sized kid for his age. He wasn't a tiny kid in other words. He was athletic and tall for his age. He already had the makings of a good body so it wasn't like she thought his "package," should be tiny, but the thing that he was holding in his hand looked like it should belong on an Arnold Schwarzenegger or somebody like that. She couldn't close the door until she was sure she was seeing what she thought she was seeing.

She continued to watch, feeling a little guilty about spying on her kid brother, but still not stopping. It was almost as if he were just trying to keep it hard. He would close his eyes, stroke it a little, and then open them as if he couldn't believe how big he was any more than she could.

She watched him for another thirty seconds and finally tore her eyes away, and shut the door as quietly as she could. She made her way over to the shower, and turned it on, adjusting the water as hot as she could take it. She had shut the door to her room, but she couldn't shut the one in her brain.

She got in the shower, and tried to forget what she had just seen, but she just couldn't do it. The image of him holding himelf ... Stroking himself ... Just wouldn't leave her brain.

Had she really just stood there and watched her brother toy with himself like that. What in the world had come over her? Was she that desperate? Had she actually gotten a point so low that she would spy on her brother while he jacked himself off, or whatever it was that he was really doing—and what would she have done if he had turned around and saw her for some reason? How embarrassing would that of been. It definitely wasn't her proudest moments, and she couldn't help but to think about what her reaction would really have been.

Shame? Disgust? Fear?

The idea of him turning around really did terrify her. Mostly because there would be no hiding what she had seen. She wouldn't just be able to sweep in under the rug. She would have had to deal with it, and she couldn't help but to imagine what that would have been like.

She pictured herself standing by the door again, with it cracked partially open, and with her peering through it like some depraved sex maniac while her brother jacked himself off. In her mind, though, he wasn't just admiring himself. In her head he was actually pleasuring himself. She thought that would have been more embarrassing so she made herself think of it that way instead of the way it really was.

She continued her thoughts along those lines and saw himself standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed as he stroked along that shaft that seemed to be longer than she thought it should be. She knew from experience that he would be picturing himself with a girl, and she actually wondered who that would be.

Cheyenne perhaps? His best friend's sister? That was possible, but her mind dismissed it. Cheyenne was also Chantell's best friend, and somehow she just didn't like the idea of Jay fantasizing about her. Amanda? Nope ... Amanda was another one of her close friends, and she'd kick her friends ass if she ever touched her little brother.

Herself?

Without even realizing it she had started to rub herself, while she thought about Jay. She tore her hands away from her mid drift as if it were on fire.

Had she really just started to do what she thought she had? The worst part was that ten minutes before that she had tried to get herself off while thinking about Tom, but no feeling had come to her. She couldn't deny that she had just started to get that feeling a second ago, but she was going to deny it anyway, because the last thing in the world she was going to do was let herself start thinking about her younger brother while she jigged herself off.

That was the last thing in the world that she needed in her life at that point. She was low enough as it was, and wasn't about to sink any further down into the abyss.

She finished her shower, got out, and dried off. Once she was dressed she headed back to her room, and tried to screw her head back on the way that it was supposed to be. As soon as she was sure she had come completely back to her senses she headed for the kitchen to grab a bite to eat.

Jay came out a few minutes later followed by Aaron, Cheyenne's younger brother.

"Hey you," Jay said.

"Hey back to ya," she said back mussing his hair per normal as she said it. "Hey squirt," she said to Aaron.

"I'm not a squirt."

"Should I call you A-hole then? Like the asses at school?" She teased.

"Hell no ... That's way worse."

"Besides squirt! In some circles that name might be a good thing!" She said and she winked at him. His face turned a little pink, and she finally noticed as she stood there that he was staring at her chest, and not her face. She looked down and about shit her pants.

"Shit!" She cursed. She had put her shirt on but only buttoned the bottom three buttons and her tits were damn near out in the open. "Damn Jay ya coulda told me," she said closing up their view and spinning around.

"I figured you knew ... I mean I don't normally have to tell you how to dress."

"Since when do I walk around with my tits damned near hanging out?" She said as she buttoned up.

Chantell turned back around. "You owe me one runt!"

"You owe me one?" She thought. "Don't I mean I owe you one ... Like I'm gonna get you back for this ... I'm gonna repay the wrong that you just did me ... That kind of thing? What's going on with you Chantell? Now your telling your brother that what? He's gotta show you something like you just showed him, and didn't he already do that earlier? Have you completely lost your friggin mind?"

She just hoped that he didn't catch the slip.

"Sure sis," he said with a smile. Should I show you now?"

"Show me what?" She said trying to play stupid.

She turned back to the fridge so that she could try to hide her face just in case it was turning red or some other stupid thing, and continued her search. She finally decided to just grab the jelly and she headed for the cupboard for the bread and peanut butter.

"Just joking ... Jeez ... Lighten up. You normally play along with my stupid jokes. What's with you anyway?"

"It's pry cuz she's grounded man ... My sister's bummed cuz she couldn't come over remember."

"Oh yeah. Guess I forgot already. That kinda does explain it," he said. "Sorry about that. I know you had all kinds of shit planned and it's all down the tubes."

Chantell shrugged. She was trying not to think about it.

Jay and Aaron started to head off.

"What you two gonna do anyway?"

"Games," Aaron said. "What else."

They turned and headed back to Jay's room, and Chantell finished making and eating her sandwich. She wasn't alone though. Her thoughts were haunting her like an angry and violent ghost.

She was definitely losing it. She kept reminding herself over and over again. She hadn't buttoned up her damned shirt--knowing that her kid brother was loose in the house. She had worn less when she knew she was alone. What's worse was that when she finally did figure it out, hadn't the first thing that crossed her mind been that she had accidently done that on purpose so that he could get a glimpse the way that she had. Hadn't that thought zipped through her head like a trapeze artist in the middle of a show?

She was pretty sure it had.

In the shower she knew she had started to imagine him fantasizing about her, and she had just started to like it when she snapped to her senses and cut the thoughts dry.

Would she really have liked it though? Thinking about her brother as a lover?

As the thoughts started to flow through her so did that all too familiar tingling sensation.

"This is getting too weird," she said. She took the last bite of her sandwich and headed back to her room.

Chantell lay on her bed, and forced herself not to think about any of it. She pressed herself with all of the will that she had left not to do what she knew deep down that she wanted to do. She knew that she was curious about the feelings that she was starting to have. She knew that she had felt the beginnings of that sexual spark, and she could feel, deep down that it was a high voltage wire that was dormant and waiting for the power to be supplied to it. If she let go and gave it the juice she could power an entire city with it, but she was afraid to. There was still that rational part of her brain that said "NO WAY, JOSE!" No way do you want to have the most incredible orgasm of your life while you think about your brother.

Still there was that other side that said "FUCK YES ... DO IT!"

"Do it, or always wonder what that most incredible orgasm would have felt like. Do it or never know. Never feel it. Forever deny yourself what you now know you really want."

She almost gave in to that second opinion too. She was just about out of will power when she finally decided to get up off of her ass, before it was too late.

She got up and went to Jay's door. She knew that she couldn't touch anything if she was actually in the room with him and his friend. Her hands would be effectively... "Tied."

She knocked on the door and waited.

"You can come in. We ain't naked!" Jay said with his usual sarcasm.

She opened the door.

"Ya never know with you two. For all I know ya got your lips tightly pressed up against each other."

"Ha ha... ," squirt said. "See I told ya she wouldn't..."

Jay punched him on the leg.

They were both sitting on computer chairs, and sitting in front of Jay's T.V. High definition military men were walking to and from. They were on a mission, and Chantell knew the game. C.O.D. It wasn't a game she liked, but she still recognized it.