What the Fuck?
Copyright© 2013 by Old Man with a Pen
Chapter 21
"David?"
"Keirstann?"
"I wanna go home."
"Me too," agreed Britt.
"Talk to the kidnapper," I said.
"He's dead, You stepped on him," said Stevie. "Girls ... you can never go home ... you're dead ... as dead as the spider. Your mangled bodies drifted ashore along with the wreckage after the storm."
"You fixed the airplane driver and his minion ... can't you fix us?"
It was snowing like mad but I had the cash counted, bagged and the spluge in the booths mopped. I was preparing to leave when a timid knocking was faintly heard on the smoked glass of the front door.
"Who is it? ... We're closed." It wasn't Billy, he had keys and he'd never knock.
"Mister?" A female voice.
'Young, ' I thought.
"Sir?"
A second voice ... also female ... also young.
"What?" I asked in my very best snarl.
"We want to buy a movie. We heard something at the bar and don't know what it is." Spoken like twins.
"We're closed. Come back in the morning," I said in a slightly less belligerent voice.
Money was slid under the crack at the bottom of the door. "We want a movie about Manage a tro."
You have no idea how long it took me to decipher the words to understand they meant Ménage à trois.
Shit ... the bill slid under the door? ... it's a fifty.
"Pick one out and keep the change," the timid voice said.
"Bring it out with you, we'll be in the Volvo across the street," said the other voice.
"Listen ... the three of you find a bed, take off your clothes and let Mother Nature take her course," I suggested.
"We need three? There's just two of us."
Big heavy sigh..."Ok ... stay away from the door. I'm armed."
Fifty bucks...
We just got in a box of dollar movies we were selling for Nine ninety nine ... cheap ... old movies ... there was one of threesome scenes cut from features. I stuck it in a bag ... snagged two twenties and left a note for Billy...
Their 245 wagon was parked next to my Seventy five dollar 544 ... A window rolled down ... a small gloved hand slipped out of the crack ... I put the bag in the hand and walked around to my car ... it started first crank. I heard the squeak and crunch of tires on new snow. Grabbing the scraper from between the seats and got out to scrape my windows... I wonder who that was? I drove to the local all-nighter for two over, bacon, biscuit and gravy, glass of milk and one of V-8 and went home to bed.
Such a dream I had that night.