Chapter 4

How to get into trouble without really trying.

Mina was either in New Orleans, on the way there or on the way home. Bill didn't think he should go away ... just in case.

What to do ... What to do?

"Wanna play Monopoly, DD?" Bill was bored.

"No, Bill." DD was still pissed.

"Fish?" That's really bored.

"Cards or river?" She might ... no ... she wouldn't.

"Cards?" Really really bored.

"No, Bill."

"River?"

"No, Bill." It's freaking winter, Bill.

"Why didn't you just say no rather than make me drag it out?"

DD chuckled.

"What's so funny?"

"You, Bill," said DD. "I thought you knew all about Kelli?"

"Kerri, DD. Her name is Kerri."

"Oh ... Sorry ... Kerri?"

"Yeah?"

"Grocery store?"

"Yeah."

"Daddy is the manager?"

"Yup."

"She's Kelli's little sister ... Kelli was the only person in school I was smarter than." DD was recalling her school years. "I at least graduated ... she got pregnant ... kid looks a lot like her father."

"Well ... that's good." Bill got quite the look, "Isn't it?" Bill said, "a child should look like her parents."

"Bill, the kid is a boy ... HE looks a lot like Kelli's father."

"Oh ... not good."

"Happens a lot more often than you'd think." DD grinned, "now you can't fuck me until you get checked."

"Oh? ... oh Shit."

"Yeah, Bill, the family that lays together usually gets 'ill' together. You could call it their family cold ... except it's not the nose that drips." She thought about it for a minute. "I'm sorry, Bill. I thought you knew. I forget about you and highschool."

"Me and highschool?"

"Yeah. You didn't know 'cause you didn't go." DD got explanatory, "The 'K's' are notorious. Kelli hangs out at the Diamond truck-stop. You could say she rents a spot. She, at least, carries condoms."

"The K's?"

"Yeah ... there's six of 'em." She counted on her fingers,

"Kathy, she's 27,

"Karen is 26,

"Karma, close to 25,

"Kamila, 24 I think,

"Kelli is 21, we were in class together,

"and Kerri, 16 or close to it.

"Mom is Kayla and dad is Ken. Gossip is that Kerri is actually Kathy's daughter ... and Ken is the dad." She grinned. "At least I didn't get pregnant ... or maybe I did and lost it ... who knows?

"Pyewacket is back."

Pye came strolling in from the kitchen looking pleased. She jumped up on DD's bed and snarled at Bill when he tried to pet her.

"Whoa! Cat." Bill jerked back, "what did I do to you?"

A catty voice reverberated in his head... 'you pissed DD off.'

'I did NOT just hear that!'

'Did too.'

"Well ... shit."

"Shit what, Bill?" DD asked.

"Pyewacket just spoke in my head." Bill looked worried. "You don't suppose... ?"

"Pye talks to us all the time." 'Don't you, Pye.' DD was not questioning ... she was making a positive statement. "What did she say?"

"Pye said you're mad at me."

"You're just figuring that out ... and it took a cat to tell you? Bill? For all you're hung like a horse and fuck some of the best women in town ... you're an idiot. Of course I'm mad at you.

"I was hoping for a little ... well, a lot ... of pussy pushing and you played with the five fingered hand of doom this morning. I mean, the girls are gone ... I had you all to myself and you wasted it!!

"THEN I find you've been messing with a member of the most disease ridden family in town. You being home alone, so to speak, now I'm going to be horny until you go to the clinic ... to make matters worse ... I TOLD YOU YOU NEEDED TO GO GET CHECKED AND YOU'RE STILL HERE!!!" DD was yelling ... and DD hardly ever yelled. "You haven't called the clinic to see if you can get in!!!

"AND YOU LEFT YOUR CELL PHONE HERE!!" DD was bouncing and you could tell it was hurting her. "I COULDN'T EVEN CALL YOU TO ADD TO THE SHOPPING LIST!!"

That last little bit was yelled as Bill was heading to the kitchen. He grabbed his cellphone, jammed it in his jeans pocket and slammed out the back door. He jumped in the Dodge ... started it and backed out the drive where he ran out of gas ... he forgot to buy any while he was shopping. He beat the steering wheel with both hands, shifted in the seat a little and like to have pinched his left ball off between his jeans and the cellphone.

"FUCK!!!" He cried to the heavens, as he climbed down from the Dodge, jerked the phone out of his pocket and threw it in a snowbank. Then he kicked the front tire.

"Problem, Bill?" Carl was snow-blowing his drive ... a wasted effort ... the temp was already 36 and climbing ... but he was doing something different. Better than sitting in his chair and watching "The Price is Right."

He made the turn with the blower and shot a huge chunk of icy wet snow at Bill.

Bill had just turned and was going to vent at Carl ... too late ... right in the kisser ... Bill did something he hadn't done in years. He sat down in the road ... in a puddle of icy water and started to cry.