Chapter 12

To say Mina was upset was like saying the Statue of Liberty is only green. I mean she is green, but she's a Whole lot more than that.

And then the governors office called ... shouted ... cussed ... yelled ... hollered ... made loud vociferous comments ... vouchsafed expletives of an unkind and libelous nature concerning her antecedents ... and a whole bunch more.

"I taped it," Mina said.

"You what?" shouted the phone. Well, not the phone, per say ... but the person on the other end.

"I recorded the entire conversation with Ms. Iodine ... that's not her name, by the way. She's Ted's daughter."

"Ted is the Evening Anchor."

"Hey ... I wanna do it."

"You guys are no damn fun at all."

"Why what?"

"I record every conversation."

"Yup ... even this one."

"Well, duh ... Just in case."

"Thanks for calling ... you saved a life."

"Whose do you think?"

"Ayup, as we say back east."

"By the way ... you spoiled a really good mad."

"Mine, silly."

Mina said, "bye," and disconnected. "Bill ... I'm pissed ... You still haven't gotten your results back ... damn it all, Bill. Has this taught you anything?"

"Condoms ... no more bareback." Bill didn't care for the rubber insulator but it was better than a drippy dick ... and WAY better than the little pecker tool. Just thinking about that made him groan and grab his crotch.

Mina caught him at it. "What? You got a painful dick? Don't tell me ... after nearly 60 days, you're finally getting symptoms. Bill!" The 'Bill' was long and drawn out.

"Nope ... the idea of the 'liner remover' nailed me a good one. Just thinking about that little tool sliding in the end of my cock and all the way to my groin. Jesus ... it's making me sweat. Then turning that shaft and the razors and hooks ... Eww ... Now I gotta pee. DD! I'm coming in!"

DD was taking a pee herself. Bill tore open the shower curtain and cut loose. "Ahhh."

"Gross!! Bill?!"

Mina came rushing in just as Bill was finishing. Like the twins they weren't, DD and Mina shouted, "Get the bleach!!"

"Clean that up!"

"Bill?!" No single word ever had such meaning!

"Oh god ... sick."

And a whole lot more. In the end ... DD stood over Bill and watched ... minutely ... as he cleaned every single inch of the entire bathroom with bleach ... and his favorite tee shirt. Some lessons are hard learned.

"You missed a spot!"

Mina supervised from the hall. Mostly to keep Bill from making DD do it.

"Bill?" she asked, as he was nearly scrubbing the white off the tile, "where's your phone?"

"In the cabinet on the charger ... Why?"

"It's ringing."

"I'll get it..." But he was shoved back into the shower.

"They'll leave a message ... or not." Mina said.

"It might be important."

"Nothing ... and I mean NOTHING is as important as you scrubbing the pee splatter out of this bathroom."

"Hi Carl." DD noticed Carl standing in the hall. "When did you get here?"

"Just after Pee Boy started cleaning."

"That long?"

"Yeah ... Bill? No, No ... don't quit ... keep scrubbing. I wanna tell you about Petri Dishes and College."

Everybody perked up. This was not only going to be relevant, but probably funny, too. Carl knew some decent stories.

"When I was taking MicroBiology 101and 102Lab, we had an assignment. We made up Petri dishes with an agar mixture and the class had to inoculate the agar with a bacteria of our choice. We were to check the cell growth and make colony counts ... first every 15 minutes and then, after two hours we switched to half an hour ... and then every 6 hours. The lab would be open all weekend.