Chapter 5: Uncharted Waters

Zelda awoke from a troubled sleep and lay still for a moment longer to enjoy how great it felt to wake up in a bed that felt good to lie in. She stretched her firm body and soaked the comfort up from the luxury of a bed with no lumps or sags. The caress of the silken nightwear Jack had insisted she buy felt wonderful to her skin. No, it was beyond was beyond wonderful. Zelda felt pampered for the first time in her life.

"Oh yes, Jack was right," she whispered to herself and smiled. The extreme cut to her nightwear made her feel sexy. The bad dreams she had the night before were forgotten.

She took her time as she got out of bed and stretched once more. Then she heard a muffled curse. Jack! She left her room clad only in one of the new abbreviated nighties Jack purchased the day before. The thirty-two year old woman felt great. She entered Jack's room and stopped and stared in amazement.

Jack's upper body hung over the side of the bed, his arms hung down. "You want to help me take a whiz? I tried to get at the urinal and I guess I sort of slipped."

"Jack! Why didn't you call out to me? You know I'd have been here in a split second for you if you had called me. Oh Jack, you scared me." She eased him back up on the bed and brought him the urinal.

As soon as he finished, she tucked him back inside his underwear. This time when he finished she felt only a small tinge of embarrassment when she handled his penis. Then she noticed he was staring at her. "Jack, it makes me nervous when you look at me like that. I ... I feel like a piece of meat on display."

"Zel, if you're meat, you have to be the finest prime rib. Jesus woman, how can I not stare, beautiful as you are."

Zelda's heart beat faster. She felt a thrill and a jolt inside her. It was a sweet, warm feeling that frightened her. "Oh Jack," she whispered and turned to take the urinal away. She didn't see the almost identical expression on Jack's face.

"Oh how romantic," she murmured to herself, "I pour pee into the toilet and think thoughts of love about a man who can only feel love in his heart and doesn't know how to express it."

She returned to Jack and placed the urinal back on its shelf in the nightstand. "Jack," she gave him a soft, almost motherly smile, "the next time you need anything, yell out. After all, that's why you pay me the big bucks, to wait on you and take care of you."

"Zel, would you give me a hug?" Jack asked in a soft voice.

She started to chastise him until she looked at his face. "Of course," she whispered to him. She let his face rest between her breasts and she kissed the top of his head.

When the hug was over, she eased his head back down onto his pillow. After Zelda kissed his forehead, he smiled and told her in a low voice, "Zelda Perkins, you are the finest. I never said that to any woman before in my life. I never realized it, but I started to connect with you while you tortured me back up at the Medical Center and called it therapy."

"Jack..." she couldn't finish her sentence.

"Look Zel," he began. Unable to look her in the eyes, he kept his eyes closed as he continued, "I damned well know that all there can ever be between us is what I got right now.

"Now I'm no whiner. My ass has been kicked around the parade ground too many times and I know what I feel inside me. I feel close to you inside and I want you to be happy. That happiness won't include me, except as things are right now. I'm the crip and you're the one person who makes it worthwhile for me to go on. Damn it, Zel, you give me meaning and hope."

Zelda felt buried in her feelings. It was hard to breathe. "J ... Jack," she struggled with her words. "Oh my god Jack, I ... I feel ... Oh god, I'm going to cry," she bawled as the tears poured down her cheeks.

In a quiet voice she had to strain to hear, Jack told her, "I want to get serious about my training. There was some talk among the docs about nerve regeneration, how nerves sometimes seemed to heal themselves at least partially. I figure the better toned my muscles are, the easier it will be for any improvement to happen. You understand?"

She bent over and kissed him. Her right cloth covered nipple brushed against his lips as she stood up again. For the first time since he got shot up, he felt something down below. "Jesus!" he whispered.

"No," she smiled down at her friend. "Wrong sex. Not the Virgin Mary either. Wrong broad." She patted his cheek.

Zelda brought a washbasin of warm water out of the bathroom and started the morning cleansing ritual. His face, back and arms were wiped with skin cleanser and then rinsed. Jack lay quiet and reveled in the fresh sensation her touch brought to his skin.

She started to wash his right foot and his toes twitched. No, it had to be her imagination. She washed his left foot and the whole foot moved. That was not her imagination. "Jack, do you feel anything in your feet?"

"Yeah, a kind of a needle sharp wiggly feeling, why?" He looked down his body at her and watched as she washed his legs.

Then she took hold of his penis and he said, "Holy Christ! I sure as hell feel that." She washed his scrotum and felt his testicles try to draw up tighter against his body. "Damn, lady," he let his head lay back against his pillow. "You sure got my attention that time."

Zelda blushed at the response her touch had caused. The embarrassment turned to excitement. "Jack!" she exclaimed and could say no more. Zelda's movements became jerky as she slipped fresh underwear and gym shorts on him.

Neither spoke until Zelda eased Jack into his wheelchair. He told her, "We need to get hold of the VA and start to make noises. I want to get started on my rehab and I don't care what that damned Creel has in mind, I'm going to start now."

"Jack honey, I don't want to discourage you, but go easy. I don't want you to get your expectations too high and then suffer a great disappointment. You hear me?"

"You called me Honey," he looked up at her. "Form now on, that's my new name." His voice was joking.

He was afraid to tell her the thoughts ha had running through his mind. What he felt inside was no joke. He was embarrassed to admit to himself what his true feelings were toward this red head who brought new meaning into his life.

Zelda laughed. She grinned at his antics and said, "Before you get too carried away, let's make a plan."

"I already done that. Now let's figure out how to implement my grand plan." Naked hunger showed on his face.

Zelda blushed again as she read the look Jack gave her. First she felt resentful for the lust that look expressed. Then she felt sad it could never come to pass. Next she began to feel a sweet warmth in her heart she had never felt toward anyone before. "Oh boy," she whispered to herself. "Oh boy." The feeling frightened her

Jack ate his breakfast and thought. He had begun to appreciate the challenge of living in his own house, even with all the help of Zelda presented. There was always going to be many unanticipated problems. "We need a crip mobile," he told Zelda.

"We need a what?" She stared at him and wondered what wild plan he had in mind this time.

"Yeah, you know, a van that has a lift gate and tie downs so you can taxi me around in a wheelchair. It needs a docking space and tie downs to keep the chair from rolling around. I already told you I wanted one."

"We might call the local dealers and see what they have available and then go from there."

Jack thought a moment and added, "I also want to call the guy I got this wheelchair from and see about an upgrade to something that will let me go out and around. I can take buses and the trolley most places I need to go by myself."

"What places are those, Jack?" Zelda was afraid he was about to go off on another wild tangent. After the excitement at the mall Zelda became concerned he'd start a vendetta against Josiah Creel. She saw the danger of that course of action, even though Jack seemed to not consider what the possible consequences might be.

"Well, the Veterans Medical Center, for one. I want to begin to use the pool and try to regain a little of what I've lost."

He stared hard into her eyes. "God damn it, Zel, you have already given me something I lost and never realized it was gone. I had given up hope and laid in that damned bed in the hospital and grew bitter. Probably next would come indifference and loss of the will to live. " His lips twisted as if he had tasted something bitter and foul.

"Then you came along and..." He paused, and then added, "You gave me hope." His voice cracked as he tried to put the urgency of his feelings into words.

His intense gaze caused her to see why this man in the wheelchair had been one of the top athletes in the world. She began to feel the will that ordered his body to excel at whatever he did. Her eyes filled with tears as she returned his stare. "Jack, whatever it takes, we'll do it together."

"Good, go get some fancy dress clothes on and we'll head out to the Medical Center and get the ball rolling. After today I'll make the trip by myself." She nodded and left to put on a miniskirted business suit.

"Damn!" Jack exclaimed when she came back out of her room, "You look just like a horny lady lawyer. I like that look. Oh yes indeedy, that's a great look."

"Oh Jack, you glib tongued devil you." She smiled at his expression and admitted, "I looked in the mirror and I kind of liked what I saw." Zelda kissed him on the top of his head. "Thank you."

On the trolley ride up to the Medical center, they spent their time talking and planning. When the lift brought Jack's wheelchair down to the trolley stop platform, Zelda got her first view of the Medical Center from the top of the hill forty feet above the entrance. She gulped.

"My god Jack, how are we going to get you down that steep hill? If you lose control for even a second you'll be road kill."

"Zel, you're the only thing that makes me lose control. Step up on the platform behind the seat and hang on for the ride of your life." He laughed at the look she gave him.

"Please Jack, don't do this. God, I get dizzy when I look down at the bottom." In her mind's eye she saw Jack in a crumpled heap at the bottom of the steep incline, bloodied and broken.

"Hey babe, other people in wheelchairs make this trip down to the Medical Center all the time. Let's go." Jack started to guide his wheelchair forward and Zelda followed.

She was unconvinced and walked behind Jack as he aimed the wheelchair toward the crossing light. She admitted to herself and Jack she was too chicken for his new attitude. Once there, Jack told her, "Look, while I get things straightened out with the therapists, I'd like for you to check and see if I have any mail. I'd like to find out about those discs a little, if I can."

The light changed and Zelda stepped on the small deck behind the seat. They went directly up to the administration offices and began the process to get Jack readmitted as an outpatient. At first Jack wasn't believed when he related what had happened.

Zelda interrupted, "How about I identify the two who grabbed Jack and dragged him away while I could do nothing but stare. They both work security here."

"Can you name them?" The man who asked the question stared hard at Zelda. He made no attempt to hide his disbelief.

"Oh can I," Zelda came back at him. "Dick Trabing has groped me and most of the females under forty that work here." Then she named the other one.