Sweet Caroline
Chapter 27
“I GOT A HOT ONE,” was heard throughout our office, meaning someone has a potential buyer in their grasp. It was Jenn’s idea for the ‘shout out’ saying that there should be a healthy competition between the girls.
Jenn went over to whoever yelled, it was Marietta, our redheaded southern girl, originally from Georgia. She told me in our original interview that all of her brothers and sisters were named after different cities in Georgia, she has a brother named Cordele, a sister named Griffin and another sister called Lilburn.
Marietta, along with Jenn came into my office. Marietta cleared her throat and said, “Someone just called about the Monte Diablo home, and it’s Karen’s listing, listed at $337,500.” I love a southern accent.
“Good,” I said. “That keeps it in the family. When does your client want to look at it?”
“In 30 minutes, Richard, it’s a married couple, they said, they really like it and are ready to make an offer,” Marietta replied.
“Did you tell them that we represent the seller as well?” I asked.
“No! Is that going to be a problem, you think?” Marietta responded.
Jenn jumped in and said, “Richard works best when we have both sides, kiddo. Don’t worry?”
“Jenn, grab the listing for me, please? Marietta, you want me to go with you on your first close?” I asked.
The poor girl was literally shaking. I walked up to her and said, “It’s OK to be nervous. You’re just like an actor, playing a role. You’ve seen homes bought and sold before, this is just your turn. Let’s go, Marietta – we’ll take my car.”
I grabbed the listing from Jenn and we left for the home. I had calmed Marietta down, and she was breathing a little easier. I patted her on her shoulder, saying, “It’s like sex, dear – the first time is all nerves, after that ... it gets easier to finish the deal.”
“If you say so, Richard? I’ve never had sex, so I understand the broad concept of ‘the first time’ but your analogy is falling on deaf ears,” Marietta said.
“A stunning girl like you hasn’t had sex. There’s a young man out there with your name on him, ready to teach you ‘closing the deal?’”
She put her hand on my leg, and I moved it away, while smiling at her as we pulled up to the house. There was a couple, waiting for us.
I said to her, “Say hi and introduce me as your broker, then I’ll tell them about our company and get to know them. Relax? If they buy, it’s your sale, even if I have to smoodge them along, OK?”
“OK, Richard – thanks.”
We got out, and things went well, I explained how we represented the seller as well. After a bit of getting to know each other, Marietta got comfortable and she was oozing her sweet southern charm.
They offered $300,000.
I excused us and turned and talked to Marietta asking, “What do you think? Can we get more?”
She said, “I think we can?” and we turned back to the couple.
“My broker here says that while $300k is a good first offer, we should at least get to $310k which is probably enough to close the deal right here and now.”
She turned to me and asked, “Will the sellers take an offer of $310k—the offer is good for only 30 minutes!”
Caroline must have talked to these girls about some of my methods, because that was right out of my playbook. She even looked at her watch.
I replied, “The seller will take an offer of $310k, but I need to hear from these folks, instead of their pretty Realtor. This home, before the crash was worth upwards of $600k, so $310k, I can live with.”
Now, an average Realtor, at this point might not be able to shut-up, but to close a deal, you have to learn how to use silence to your advantage. So, I was quiet and I looked at the couple, waiting.
They huddled, and came out with big smiles, saying, “You’ve got a deal at $310k.”
We all shook hands, all of the signatures were in place, and Marietta gave them their keys, flashing her smile and saying, “I hope you folks will remember O’Hara and O’Hara in the future? Goodbye.”
I took her by the hand and we walked back to the car. We pulled away and headed back to the office. As I expected, she let out a big whoop, and said, “If sex is any better than the feeling I have right now, maybe I ought to give it a try.”
I told her, after figuring it roughly in my head that she just made herself about $5,200. She let out another whoop for that and we got back to the office, where everybody was waiting for Marietta to say something. She played it pretty cool, walked in, handed the paperwork to Caroline, and then she jumped up and whooped one more time.
Everybody came up to her, congratulating her. I walked over to Caroline and gave her a kiss. “She did great,” I said. “She used my ‘the offer is good for 30 minutes’ bit and it worked. I hope you haven’t given away all of my secrets, lover?”
“Don’t worry, the important ones are safe with me, and Jenn,” she said sporting a delicious smile.
The day was over, we had the weekend before us to just chill and have fun. We all got in the car and went home. Jenn had moved in with us, and was enjoying fawning over Caroline, while Caroline was equally enjoying being fawned over.
Suddenly Caroline screamed, holding her stomach and saying, trying to recover, “Take me to the hospital Richard, I think it’s time?”
“But,” I said. “You’re not due for over a month?”
Caroline grabbed my hand and said, plain and with no emotion, “Take me to the fucking hospital big brother, we’re going to have a baby-today.”
Jenn grabbed Caroline’s hand from the back seat, while I turned a shade of pale, while at the same time, put my foot on the accelerator towards Dameron Hospital. Caroline was breathing hard but not screaming anymore.
“Jenn, call my OB please? It’s Doctor Patricia Hatton,” Caroline said.
“Sure thing, Caroline – just breathe, I’ll call her,” Jenn replied. A minute later Jenn said, “She’s meeting us at the hospital, she thinks it might just be a false labor pain.”
We pulled up to the emergency room, asking for a wheelchair. They got her inside quickly – Jenn re-parked the car and caught up with us.
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