06 Home
Copyright© 2012 by Banzai Ben
Chapter 13
Flashback – Major M – Undisclosed location
We parked in a valley then crawled to the top of a dune to carefully survey the site of the battle. Even using our periscopes it was obvious there was mass carnage, immense damage and that any survivors had long since left. I crawled with my team to the top of the dune where we could have a better look, sat down and asked, "Okay what's your analysis of what you see."
The L.Cpl. was taking photographs and stated, "I would say they got their asses kicked! Look over there, isn't that the wreckage of an aircraft."
My Sgt. added, "And there are some destroyed Hinds. Just how many vehicles were involved in the attack?"
I questioned, "I'm not sure but I would think more than one. Now why were they transporting tanks and what the hell happened to the first tank?"
My Sgt. replied, "Something detonated the munitions store and blew it to hell. But the third tank is interesting because it's off the trailer."
I looked at my men and surmised, "With the aircraft, Hinds and tanks plus all the dead troops I think this was a trap."
The L.Cpl. answered, "Well it sure the hell was a failed trap because there's nothing here except for RG vehicles."
I asked my men, "What do you think? Could all this be the work of Baskerville?"
They both shook their heads, the Sgt. stated, "I highly doubt that."
The L.Cpl. added, "No way! I would say at least three vehicles."
Yeah that was my concern. I had wondered about the 'connection' between Baskerville and the Sedankina bitches - perhaps they had joined forces. Yeah that was the only thing that made sense...
Flashback – Mira and Ira – Undisclosed location
I whispered to Ira, "Fecal matter, Fecal Matter, FECAL MATTER! The range is too great." Yes for once my quarry was beyond the range of my beloved PSG-1 rifle.
My sister Mira was incredibly incensed since we had just observed, with our personal ocular units, three potential targets crest a dune across the valley from us. And then they ultimately decided to position their posteriors on top of the dune. They were foolish to allow their corporeal bodies be on such display. From the apparent size we both knew the range was approximately 1700 meters - well past the range of the PSG-1.
I acquired the potential targets with my spotting scope, maximized the magnification and grinned. I announced in a sing-songed vocal utterance, "Mirinka, the lady of lucky has grinned upon us today. One of those three targets is your Major M."
Mira expounded, "Son of a female saluki! Irinka are you positive."
I replied, "Affirmative my sister. I would cognize that face anyplace. And their range is one-thousand-seven-hundred-four meters."
Mira grinned at me and commenced, "The only thing better than a quick death from a well-placed shot... "
I continued, "... is to chase down our quarry and deliver the death blow... "
Mira finished, "... with the blades of our katanas."
We quickly formulated a plan...
Flashback – Major M – Undisclosed location
My Sgt. pointed and questioned, "What the hell is that."
I followed his hand, saw two motorcycles headed our way from across the valley (and cursed for letting us be so exposed) and ordered, "That is big fucking trouble! We need to get the hell out of here right now!"
We sprinted down the back of the dune, jumped into the Humvee and I ordered, "L.Cpl. get us the hell out of here, if we're caught by those two motorcycles, we're as good as dead. Sgt. man the turret gun."
The L.Cpl. did a hell of a job, but the motorcycles gained on us. The Sgt. asked, "Sir do you want me to fire warning shots?"
I ordered, "Hell no! Because they sure as hell aren't going to be firing warning shots at us."
Flashback – Mira and Ira – Undisclosed location
We easily approached the vehicle which housed Malodorous Major M and when we approached a soldier in the turret commenced to fire upon us. I signaled Ira and we changed formation. Our new paradigm allowed one of us to approach closer while the buffoon on the machine gun concentrated on the other one of us.
I was finally close enough and...
Flashback – Major M – Undisclosed location
Rounds peppered the Humvee! Some even penetrated the cab and bounced around inside. I yelled, "Sgt. what the hell are you doing."
He yelled back, "Sorry Sir I was after one of them and the other one snuck up on us."
Fuck this shit, we need two gunners! So I crawled into the back with my rifle, kicked out the rear window and fired at one of the Sedankina bitches. She must have seen what I was going to do because with all the fucking bouncing around we were doing and with her swerving, I missed.
They were firing at the Humvee, then I finally figured out what they were trying to do and yelled, "L.Cpl. whatever you do don't let them take out the engine."
More rounds hit the Humvee and one even glanced off my helmet...
Flashback – Mira and Ira – Undisclosed location
I grinned inside my cranial carapace because one of my shots impacted the Malodorous Major M's Kevlar cranial carapace. Oh, I knew it would not terminate him but it would make his auditory units chime like the church bells at his upcoming funeral.
He readied to fire at me again but this time I accelerated and his shots went behind me.
I readied to fire at the engine when... "FECAL MATTER!"
Flashback – Major M – Undisclosed location
The L.Cpl. slammed on the brakes and I yelled, "What the hell is wrong!"
He yelled back, "We were headed toward a ravine."
The good news was the Sedankina bitches overshot us. The L.Cpl. spun the wheel hard, floored it and bought us some breathing room...
Flashback – Ira and Mira – Undisclosed location
Mira readied to deliver the death blow to the engine of the vehicle when it abruptly stopped and we locomotivated past it.
I started my turn to pursue when I hit an unfortunate bump which caused my motorcycle to deposit my derriere onto the sand. Mira rode up as I recovered and questioned, "Ira are you injured?"
I crimsoned, "My only injury is to my pride!"
Mira teased, "Yes my sister I know you are proud of your derriere."
I questioned, "Mira perhaps it is time for an ambush of haste?"
Mira grinned and stated, "Yes I will locomotivate here." She pointed to a location on the map, I continued, "... and I will shepherd them toward your location."
I reacquired my motorcycle and the chase continued...
Flashback – Jack – Undisclosed location
We returned to the battleground but no one was around. Banzai noticed, "Jack are those motorcycle tracks?"
I replied, "Pull up beside them and I'll take a look."
He pulled up close to them, I opened the door and stated, "Hell yes, it looks like Mira and Ira have been here already."
Banzai questioned, "Can you tell which way they were headed."
I looked closely at them and guessed, "I think that way." And I pointed behind us.
Banzai spun the Frankenmonster around, floored it and said, "I hope we're not too late."
I thought it would serve the bastard Major M right if he did get caught. Sending us to this damn place without an exit strategy...
Then I came up with another hell of an idea. When I told Banzai he laughed so hard we almost wrecked.
Flashback – Major M – Undisclosed location
Well that was short lived, but at least this time we only had one motorcycle to deal with. I saw the other one go down and assumed either it or hopefully the Sedankina bitch that rode it was injured.
I ordered, "Sgt. since there's only one of them, you keep them busy while I see if I can arrange exfiltration for us. I got on the radio, sent an SOS message and was surprised as hell with the response I got. I ordered, "L.Cpl. head toward the coast."
As he turned to the new heading the motorcycle came up beside us and fired, so he swerved away from the motorcycle. I yelled, "Sgt. can't you do anything about that damn motorcycle?"
He replied, "Sir, I'm trying my best. But it's like trying to swat a fly with a two-by-four."
I swore, "Damn let me help you." I crawled into the back of the Humvee and damn he was right. I tried to fire at the motorcycle but she swerved all over the place. I ordered again, "L.Cpl. we need to head toward the coast if we ever hope to get the hell out of here."
He turned and again the Sedankina bitch came up beside us and fired so he returned to the original course. I yelled, "Shit we're being herded into..."
I never got to finish because the L.Cpl. yelled, "Sir someone shot the engine."
I commanded, "Shit one of them is acting as a sniper somewhere! Keep us moving as long as you can." But I knew it was just a matter of time until I had to face the Sedankina bitches. I sent another e-mail to my Mossad friend with hopes he could call them off...
Flashback – Mira – Undisclosed location
Ah yes, one well-placed round into the vehicles engine and it was only a matter of time until Malodorous Major M would be mine. But before I exacted a protracted and painful revenge, he would deliver the harlequins into our hands along with Baskerville. With every element of my being I anticipated the requirement of an extreme settlement of score with the harlequins. Their death could not be slow enough or painful enough for my liking.
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