Chapter 20: Martial Arts and woodland skills

I wanted to start some organized exercises. I'd always been interested in Tai'Chi. The library had a DVD on it. I took it home, studied it and did my best. I wasn't very good, but I kept trying. I found a self-defense shop that specialized in TaiQuanDo. The young fellow running it knew Tai'Chi and was willing to give me some pointers—for a price. What the hell. He was a business-man and we both knew it. He got me going on the right path. After four weeks of practice, once per day under his watchful eye he called me 'adequate'. I almost shot the bastard.

I went on to teach the kids what I'd learned. Pretty soon I noticed that the kids were getting bored. I said 'fuck it'. I bought two fifty-pound sacks of white beans and strapped them to the tops of two weighted wooden barrels. I had the kids punch the bags for ten minutes every night, then twenty minutes, then thirty minutes. I watched them, and had them change from a straight punch to a punch through the body line, kicking off of one foot, to a punch through, to a punch-with-a-twist. They were getting some muscles. I added push-ups and sit-ups to their PT.

I hung a little bell from a string about shoulder high to the kids. I toe-kicked it, knocking it against the ceiling. I had them work at it until they could do it at will. Then I raised the bell. I taught them the snap kick, the bicycle, or 'cheerleader' kick, the side kick and the roundhouse kick.

They were getting pretty good! They had some speed coming along. Come spring I had a heavy bag put in. They took out a lot of aggression on that thing.

When the weather got nice enough so that we wouldn't get lung-burned, I taught them how to run Indian-fashion, on the balls of their feet, one behind the other. (it's more efficient) Bored kids on a farm will do damned near anything to stay occupied. I proved it!

For their birthdays I got them enrolled in a karate dojo. They learned all the protocols and the humble-me shit. Then they began learning forms. They complained to me that the master was taking his own sweet time and spoon feeding it to them. I gave him an extra grand to keep them interested. Kim damned near split his breast bone with a knuckle strike the first time he walked up to her and tried to slap her! He called me in.

"What the hell have you been teaching these kids?"

"Bean bag straight punch, through punch, twist punch. Kick-the-bell straight kick, bicycle kick, side kick and roundhouse. Add push-ups, sit-ups and running like hell. They've damned near destroyed the heavy bag I put in three months ago."

"Jesus. They're aggressive enough for a wolf pack. I'll get them started on the next set of forms right away. I just hope I can keep them focused."

"I started them with Tai'Chi. Use that as a mechanism to ground them. Teach them center and ground, awareness and the forms. They'll be fine.

"Yeah, but what about ME?"

I grinned and slapped his shoulder. "Somebody's gotta pull the plow. Looks like you're elected. Look at it this way. After this you'll be able to teach anyone but a slug."

Julie was worried.

"Howard, what are the kids doing at night?"

"I've got them going to a karate dojo. I don't want them to be vulnerable to any predators, and since they don't have much peer interaction I don't want them to be bullied, either. This will give them confidence and the skills to back up any arguments they may get into."

"Won't they turn into bullies instead?"

"Nope. The training's designed to stop that. Besides, if I see it happen I'll straighten them right out."

"Have, um, have you trained like this?"

I smiled and nodded. "I look all normal, don't I? I've got two black belts. If I pick up a heavy stick then it's all over for the other guy unless he's quite special. Then I'll stand off and shoot him."

She didn't look convinced.