Chapter 14: College Is a Bad Joke

Our professors had zero grasp of the real world. Absolutely none. Plan a construction project and don't save funding for the Union bosses, the building inspectors, even the cop on the beat? Everyone wants their vigorish. Nothing will pass if there's even anything left to work with when the cop looks the other way.

No bribes for the Union ... your plumbing pipe goes missing, even the carpenters NAILS are gone. Or someone "accidentally" sprays water on them and they rust ... since you didn't bribe the inspectors you have to knock down every wall with a rusty nail and redo it.

No bribe for the electrical inspector? Your wiring isn't to code. My boss always left a Benjamin in the fuze box and he made sure there was no one in sight when the box was opened.

Nope. Not one single mention of real life.

Nothing was ever mentioned in or out of class about real world politics.

Speaking of politics, we had two kinds of profs. The Communists and the Veterans. The commies railed against the president, congress, the military industrial complex and extolled the wonders of Marxism. They hated ROTC and the CMD. (Reserve Officer Training Command and the Civilian Marksmanship Department.) Guns are evil and need to be kept out of the hands of civilians.

The Vets relived the glories of war and left out the goriest parts. They backed ROTC and the CMD, wore their dress uniforms to class and the Marines carried their swords to class. Guns are wonderful for those trained to use them.

They both supported the draft. The commies were all for the obedience and discipline.

The Vets wanted to make sure the students knew what bad grades meant... 2 years cleaning latrines. College men were in the ROTC unless they were physically unable. Women were compelled to take Home Economics. After all she's just going to be an officer's wife and waste her education.

If you were in one of the Arts and Sciences curricula you still marched in formation.

America has always trained for the last war ... the next one always caught the military off guard.

Engineering studied military science and explosives.

Even the Flying Club was headed up by a former flight instructor.

We pretty much hated it. We had apartment inspections once a week. Wendy was expected to maintain grades and keep a spotless home. We hired a maid.

The inspector didn't like that one bit. Threats were made, but certain accommodations could be made if Wendy only cooperated. She suggested a place to put his cooperation. He became insistent. She shot him in the balls with her LadySmith.

Police arrived, she was taken into custody. My father arrived at the jail with the State Police and a State Supreme Court Judge. They were not allowed admittance. They came in anyway.

A forcible rape was being attempted. Arrests were made. The local newspaper printed the whole ordeal ... with pictures Wendy's face before and after and pictures of each of the attackers ... in uniform.

Other women came forward and accused. The administration tried a coverup ... the administration tried bribes.

The Alumni got involved. Donations to the Stadium Fund ceased.

The League of Women Voters protested in front of the Admin Building.

We were expelled. I was amazed, I was on a field trip and had no knowledge of the events.

We were reinstated a week later.

We were expelled the next day.

We were reinstated the day after.

Wendy was expelled.

Wendy sued. Daddy pursued.

Wendy was reinstated.

I was expelled ... because I couldn't control my wife.

I sued.

I was reinstated.

Daddy sued.

The Dean of Men was arrested. Several of the women who came forward fingered him as the prime instigator of their mistreatment.

Well what do you know. The semester was over. We Time Bunked into the Registrars office, changed our grades to 4.0, removed all the records of our ordeal and registered for classes for the second semester. We changed our address to our new home, and went to Key West, Florida for the weather.

We sunned and beached, bought a little sailboat, a 28 foot Triton, sailed it a little, partied on it a lot, and used it instead of an apartment or hotel. It wasn't cheaper but it was a lot more fun.

We celebrated with a lot of sex. While Wendy was in the custody of our friendly jackbooted thugs she was bruised and battered but penetration had not been achieved. I wasn't happy about what happened to her but retribution was in process and I settled for that. If, however, the guilty parties were free when we went back to school, I planned to use the watch and arrange things more to my liking.