Chapter 11

"We don't have all the hours you owe me, but I want what I can get when I can get it," she said looking at me with her big blue eyes.

"I'm grateful for any time we have together," I said.

After that there was not much talking. I pulled her skinners off her slowly, kissing her smooth fair skin as it was revealed. The nipples that had distracted so much were pale pink and sensitive. They sat on perfectly round but small mounds. My warm mouth on them caused her to shiver and gasp.

Her sex was pale with a pink center as well. She smelled divine and tasted of pure woman. Her body was sleek and toned as only a Marine's can be. The perfect musculature and unblemished skin combined with no hair, set a forbidden yet wanton image.

In truth women Marines look incredibly young because of the augmentation and hygiene necessary to wear Armor.

Amy enjoyed it when I looked at her. She told me I made her feel like she was in heat. When she looked at me I knew that no woman had ever truly loved me before. I could see it in her eyes, feel it in her touch, and hear it in her voice.

When we joined I felt complete. I forgot about my delayed death sentence. I forgot about my family. I forgot about the million living things I had killed. All that mattered was the living breathing loving woman that wanted me inside of her.

I lie on my back and Amy was next to me with her head on my chest and a leg thrown over my hips.

"I was nineteen. My family was fairly well off. Dad was an engineer and Mom was a medical researcher. I had two sisters. Genova was four years older, and Deidre was two younger. Genova had just gotten married. I was attending the University where my Mom was a professor.

"I suppose we were a close family. My sisters and I got along really well. Deirdre and I were playmates as kids and Genova was a great big sister.

"We had just found out that Genova was pregnant. She was very happy. Her husband, Randal, was a good guy. A bit of a nerd, but he doted on Genova. It was kind of funny. Genova a cheerleader, top of her class, the poster girl for beautiful and successful. Randal was shy, kind, smart, and short. I liked him even though I stood a head taller than the guy. Randal was two years older than Genova and they did not know each other until College even though they went to the same high school.

"Genova was raped. Brutally raped. I'm not sure there is such a thing as a non-brutal rape, but it was bad. Randal was not there, but he found her. Something snapped in the guy. He stayed with her on the way to the hospital. Genova was hurt but would recover. She lost the baby though. Genova told him what happened. She was drugged but not very well and remembered most of what happened. When Randal found out who did it he waited until she was asleep and left.

"Three guys from the high school she had went to had attacked her. Randal went to Frank Pattingson's house and confronted him. Pattingson was the big man on campus in high school. He and Genova had a bit of history in high school, but it was brief and Genova ended it, wounding his fragile ego. His father was a Planetary Representative with aspirations of holding a seat in the Republic's Congress and very wealthy. Randal who was quiet and easy going, avoided conflict and was probably the gentlest man you ever met, had decided to fight for his wife.

"I only know what came out in the trial. What I think really happened is they mocked and tormented him and beat him until he died. They realized they fucked up and made it look like he attacked them.

"They got off with a slap on the wrist. It was obvious the judge was in Representative Pattingson's pocket. It later came out that the judge was a big political supporter and had a clear conflict of interest.

"After the trial Genova committed suicide. It devastated everybody. If it had ended there I wouldn't have done what I did. At least not right away and in the way I did.

"Frank had a younger brother. He was Deidre's age. He started to make advances on her. Deidre didn't say anything and we didn't notice the effect it had on her. That is until I found her unconscious. She had tried to overdose. She wouldn't tell my parents what happened, but she told me.

"Frank's brother had spread rumors and did his best to ruin her life because she had fought him off once. Her life was miserable and she didn't see any way to escape her tormentors. Our sister's trial taught her the authorities were powerless.

"I was not. Something in me changed that day as I held Deidre as she cried. Losing my older sister was bad. Losing my younger as well was not something I could let happen. I never told my parents. That afternoon I went to Frank's house. I knew his buddies would be there. I rang the bell and when Frank answered the door I stuck a knife in his chest. I stabbed him just under his ribcage and up into his chest.

"He never made a sound. I pushed him backward and shut and locked the door. The rest of them were in the back watching the holo. I guess they were expecting a delivery. When I walked into the room they didn't notice the knife as I held it low and behind my leg. They jumped up and started posturing. I egged one on and when he and his friend advanced with little brother in tow I killed all three of them. I hurt all of them and they died slowly and feeling the fear and pain they had shown my sister. By the time the police arrived I had made sure there would be no revival for them. I had cut all four of their heads nearly off.

"During my trial it came out about the corrupt judge. Frank's father had to resign in disgrace. The judge offered me the Marines, the needle, or a penal mining colony. So here I am."

"What happened to Deidre?"

"I don't know. I couldn't talk to them after my sentencing. I know that my home world is a Lizard colony. I know they made it off the planet but I don't know anything else."

For everybody else getting boots assigned, outfitted, and introduced was a duty you took seriously. The FNG might be in a position to save your ass so it's in your best interest to get them squared away. I rarely had to participate in that cluster fuck though. Force Recon rarely took boots and lifers were not chosen to be leaders of the FNGs. Some Marines loved the duty. They got to brag and look tough to the wide eyed newbies and scout out the fresh meat in the hopes of finding a new fuck buddy.

Of course when I ran into a FNG they sometimes assumed I was one too since I was a private like them. I just avoided them by pointing them in another direction. With the old man referencing me in his welcome speech they got curious and ended up finding out my name. It was not a secret unfortunately.

The looks when I was in the chow hall actually got on my nerves some. The boots though were mostly not brave enough to walk up to a table of Force Recon as we ate. We tended to sit together. The increased risk and dangerous missions glued us together. Some of us had an almost open disdain for FNG's and all boots. Most did not though. The boots did however tend to ask stupid questions so we all avoided them.

"Sweeeny I want you to talk to the lifers we got. There are eight of them."

"What do you want me to say?" I asked not happy. I had never heard of eight in one graduating class before.

"What's expected of them. How to fucking get along. You're the only lifer I've ever really met. The rest are mostly shit birds who die fast. Stupid program should be shut down. It's a waste of resources."

I agreed it was a waste of resources. Most lifers did not make it past drop five. Of course those odds were not a whole lot worse than a regular FNG's. What really grated on the nerves of your average Marine is that every Marine considered themself the best of the best. They competed and studied hard to make it into boot camp. Once there the majority washed out and some died. Why you might ask does somebody volunteer for something so dangerous. It's not pay, although it is substantial, it is for status.

When you get out of the Marines you are set for life. It is the only practical way into those rarified circles of people with real power. For the last couple hundred years or so the military or former military had been gaining power. Many hold public offices, others private influential positions of power. A Marine does not have to pay taxes, is allowed to own military grade weaponry, and gets the best medical care available. Often they are granted land on fringe planets and given governing posts to civilize the often wild and somewhat lawless new colonies. They are almost universally held in high regard. If a Marine was caught by the police with a bloody knife in his hand and told them it was paint they would consider it before arresting him even though there was a body laying in a pool of blood nearby. And they most likely would wait for the Marine liaison officer to show up, even if the Marine was retired, before moving to arrest him. It is safer for the police that way.

The rewards were great for being a Marine and as such, despite the danger, there is fierce competition to get in and someday wear Armor. Fuckups and criminals suiting up in Armor tended to offend those that sacrificed to get to the same position. Nobody liked lifers and in turn lifers returned the sentiment.

How I was going to influence them was unclear though. I'm no motivational speaker. I hate lifers as much as the next Marine.

If it was not for Amy I would have been most likely ignored by the brass as usual. Santiago seemed different. So did Firsk, but they were the first. I liked being ignored. Attention directed at a lifer was rarely good.

They were in a classroom unaware of why they were there. I walked and they jumped a little, then saw I was a private like them. I looked at them taking them in quickly. They were typical boots, excited and feeling on top of the world. Eight young men. I had seen their records and all eight were plain criminals that had started small and ended up killing somebody. One scored a solid gamma while the rest were low gamma in their Armor proficiency ratings.

"The old man wanted me to talk to you. I'm Sweeney and I'm a lifer too. I'm not going to try to appeal to your better natures even if you have them. The old man thinks training lifers is a waste of resources. I do too. If you like life there are a couple things you can do to prolong it. Knock the fucking chips off your shoulders. Even if you are tougher than anybody else in your battalion it won't help you one bit. It will only get you killed faster on a drop. You need your fire team, squad, platoon to like your ass and look out for you. If they don't, you're just really expensive Lizard chow.

"Keep your mouths shut. Do the shit duty you get and will get for the rest of your lives and remember its better than the needle or the penal mining colony.

"And don't fucking hang out together. Fucking eat with your fucking fire team. They won't like you to begin with but it is in your best interest for them to not hate you.

"And remember you are here until you die. We are all dead men. Your fellow Marines that volunteered will most likely die too. So you are not much different than them if you don't want to be."

"Who the fuck are you?" one of the lifers asked. His nametag said Dhowe.

"Nobody. Just another lifer living on borrowed time. You haven't listened to me but your heard me and hopefully will remember what I said if you live long enough. Report back to your platoons."

"You're a fucking joke. Some ass kisser that has forgotten he has balls," one of the others, a Private Seetar said standing up.

I just stared at him wondering what would happen if I killed him. Then I thought of Amy and relaxed.

He must have thought I was backing down or showing weakness. For whatever reason his rock for a brain came up with, he pushed me. When his push accomplished little and all I did was frown at him, he tried to punch me.

I aggressively blocked his punch hyper extending his elbow when I struck it with my forearm. My second strike caught him on the point of his chin and he went up and over the table landing boneless.

The other loud mouth Dhowe attacked me as well. He managed to land a fist on me but I turned and it hit my abs directly instead of my kidney. My fist caught him on the side of his head and my knee caught his groin followed by my elbow straight up and on his nose as he started to bend over in pain, I was too close to use anything else.

When the others started to move I looked at them and said, "sit."

They dropped their asses back down in their chairs promptly. The emphasis on training to fight lizards at the expense of everything else left new Marines with glaring deficiencies in other forms of combat. I could see why they did it. Keeping the regiments at fighting strength required freshly trained Marines at an alarming rate. Something had to give I guess. I think we, the Marines, suffered for it by putting less prepared people in Armor. That was the way of things for now though.

I pressed the intercom on the wall.

"Connect me with Col. Santiago's office," I said.

"Col. Santiago's office, Pvt. Steward speaking."

"This is Pvt. Sweeney. Is the Colonel available? It's about my pep talk."

"Hold," he said.

"What's the problem Sweeney?" came Santiago's voice.

"I've got a couple of rocks here that were not as hard as they thought they were," I said.

"Are they dead?"

"No. Two are damaged Sir."

"Any facilities damaged?"

"No Sir."

"Tell the walking ones to get the other two to med bay and then get outside my office fucking yesterday."

"Aye Aye Sir."

I turned back to them, they were looking a little more worried now.

"I'd fucking move if I were you. Stupid shit like this puts him in a bad mood."

They got up and cast a quick glance at the two lying on the ground. They were both starting to groan and come around. I didn't hang around. The whole thing had put me in a bad mood.

Twenty seven years, wait twenty eight now I thought. My anniversary date had passed down on the Grinder. I didn't have the chip on my shoulder like any other the other lifers I met. I considered my sentence a bargain for killing the four that I had. What I grew to resent at times was that no matter how good I was it didn't matter. I was not getting promoted. Those two shit birds would not have tried that with a Sergeant or better. I was not ever going home a war hero. The shit duties were always mine. The attitudes from other Marines, even in my own company, were bad and mostly justified for most lifers. My company, and even battalion, respected my abilities in battle and even though I was sort of the red-headed step child I was Force Recon Whisky and still family. The problem was that just as soon as people started to come around they died.

I had planned and almost tried to escape a long time ago. It would have been a death sentence if I had tried back then. Now I could disappear when I wanted. But what would I do? Where would I go? I had no home. No way to leave the planet I deserted on. If I was honest with myself I didn't want to leave.

When Amy asked me what I would do if I wasn't a lifer, it caught me by surprise. My answer was true. I would stay for her. I would probably stay even without her. It got me thinking thoughts that never did me any good. Thoughts of freedom. It was hard to imagine most of the time. They were vague thoughts of solitude on a frontier world, but whenever I thought about it seriously the fantasy fell apart. Being a Marine is all I knew how to do. Amy was right. I was good at it.

I went to the gym and burned off some steam.

"Fuck Sweeney. What the fuck are they feeding you?" asked Gomez who had just walked in with part of the platoon. It was empty before, the way I liked it.

I just stopped and got up. I started to wipe myself off as they gathered around me.

"Fuck Sweeney. You were doing reps with this?" asked Cpl. Reed.

I just shrugged and started to unload the bar.