Chapter 1

I opened my eyes to the bare, white walls of my cell ... errr, room. I have lost track of how long I have been here; it could have been days to months to years. I was committed to this place after something inside me snapped and I killed my girlfriend. Well, she was cheating on me with my ex-boyfriend and I walked in on them in my bed together. He ran out the door like the coward he is but she stayed behind; maybe she thought that I would forgive her for her indiscretion, I will never know.

Anyway, the court found me guilty of murder, which is not surprising. What is surprising is that the jury found me to be insane, or temporarily insane; so here I am, a 'patient' at Arklight, the insane asylum. Although it is not politically correct for Arklight to be called an insane asylum, they prefer to 'psychiatric hospital', whoever "they" are.

But I digress.

I crawled out of bed and squirmed my way underneath. I had managed to acquire a pen sometime after I came to this place and started to mark the wall every time I woke up. Granted I could be waking up at some random time and not know if it was morning or not; there are no windows and I am not allowed outside. So I mark the wall under my bed in a vain effort to hold onto sanity.

There was a knock on the door and a voice calling "Sophie, time to wake up."

That was my signal to roll out from under the bed, hide the pen, and look drowsy. I needed to create the illusion that I had just woken up when I went to open the door. Originally the orderlies would just knocked and opened the door; I am not sure what caused the change but now I, and I assume all of the other patients, have to open the door to the orderlies when they call.

I open the door slightly and saw Alan; he was the one orderly that I could not stand. He always seemed to have a smug look on his face and he treated the patients badly, well the female ones anyway. And if we tried to complain to the head doc we got dosed with extra meds to keep us sedated; not that we are really sedated, just more mood altering drug experiments.

I glared at Alan, "Can I help you Alan?"

"Do behave Sophie, unless you want to get your extra medications? I can make sure that you are properly cared for while you are ... sedated. I do not mind watching over your reaction to the medications." Alan smirked at me as I blanched.

The sleaze; I shuddered but I opened the door to allow Alan into the room like a good little patient. Alan went around and inspected the bed and checked the hinges on the door. Then he went to check the bathroom. I tried to finish remaking the deal before he came back out but he knew me by this point; he stared at my ass as I remade the bed that he had ripped apart. When he was satisfied that I made the bed to the standards of the asylum he handed me my clothes for the day.

I stood waiting for him to leave so I could go shower and go to breakfast. Alan just stood there leering at me. Too bad there was no door to the bathroom that I could slam in his face. I knew that Alan would be standing at the doorway to the bathroom, just watching me. I hated this part; why couldn't Beth or George or Frank be the ones that came in the morning? They at least had a little respect for me and gave me some privacy when I showered. Alan on the other hand constantly watched.

I striped out of the PJs that I had slept in and placed them on the bathroom counter and turned on the water in the shower. As the water was warming up I brushed my teeth, trying to stay outwardly calm; if I showed that I was upset Alan would be there, touching me, trying to "help" me calm down. I had learned that the hard way the first time he was the orderly sent to wake me up in the morning. I just hoped that this time he would not be standing outside the shower waiting when I came out.