Chapter 22: Pulling a Monster

Amber walked around the camper. After her third circuit around it, she stopped by Dexter.

“It’s big,” she said.

“Yeah,” Dexter said looking over the camper.

He had just hooked the huge truck up to it. Amber was there because he hadn’t been sure if he would be able to hook up the camper, without someone guiding him. Even with her help, it had taken more than a dozen attempts to line up the ball of the trailer hitch, to the receiver of the camper.

“Do you know how to drive, pulling something like that?” Amber asked.

“Of course! I’m a guy,” Dexter said somewhat confidently.

He had no idea how he was going to pull that behind the truck.

Amber looked at Dexter and then burst out laughing.

At his pained expression, she said, “You’ve got no idea what you’re doing.”

Dexter looked sheepish for a moment. “No, I don’t.”

“It’s big,” Amber said looking back at the camper.

“I know,” Dexter said.

Amber asked, “What do we do now?”

“I guess we get in the truck and take it on the road,” Dexter answered.

Dexter held the door open for Amber. She climbed into the truck thankful that she was wearing blue jeans. There was no way a woman could climb into that monster truck with a skirt and maintain much, if any, modesty. Dexter closed the door, and walked around to the driver’s side. He opened the door and climbed into the truck.

“I really appreciate you helping me out like this,” Dexter said while starting the engine.

“I wasn’t doing anything today, anyway,” Amber said.

Dexter pulled forward a little and started to turn the wheel. He glanced in the mirror and slammed on the brakes. He had almost hit the car parked next to the camper.

“This isn’t good.”

“What?”

“I don’t know if I can get out of here,” Dexter said.

He backed the truck up watching the camper in the mirror.

It took Dexter three attempts to get the camper out of the parking spot. He had to move forward a bit, back up a bit, move forward a bit more, and then turn so that he missed the cars to either side and the one in front. In a way, he was lucky that it was the middle of the day in the middle of the week. He never would have been able to get it out of the parking lot on the weekend.

“That wasn’t too bad,” Amber said as under her breath, she added, “for a near disaster.”

She had been watching when the camper missed one of the parked cars by less than two inches. She looked over at Dexter. He was sweating.

“It should be easier, from now on,” Amber said.

Dexter ran over the curb when leaving the parking lot. He couldn’t change lanes because cars were whipping past on both sides. He nearly didn’t get it stopped at the first intersection in time. He nearly hit a telephone pole when he turned a corner. That got him a block away from the apartment complex.

“This isn’t going so well,” Dexter said.

His hands were starting to hurt from holding onto the steering wheel so tightly.

“You’re doing fine,” Amber said.

“We’ll see,” Dexter said.

Amber said, “You know this isn’t really intended for driving in the city. I bet it will be a lot better when you get on an interstate.”

“Maybe,” Dexter said.

The longest half hour of Dexter’s life passed before he reached the street on which he formerly lived. Whether through luck or some minor skill, he managed to arrive without causing an accident.

He was about to turn into the driveway of his old house when Amber said, “Stop.”

Dexter hit the brakes wondering if he had missed seeing something. “What?”

“What are you doing?” Amber asked.

“I’m turning into the driveway,” Dexter said.

Amber said, “You’re going to have to back the camper into the driveway ... unless you can drive the truck out the back of the garage.”

“Damn,” Dexter swore.

Amber said, “I better get out, so that I can direct you.”

“Okay,” Dexter said.

Amber climbed out of the truck and walked over to the driveway. She stood where Dexter could see her. Dexter pulled forward a bit so that he could back into the driveway. He put it into reverse and cut the wheel. The camper went in the wrong direction. Dexter growled. Amber shook her head. Dexter pulled forward again, and started backing up.

Dexter was lucky that the house had a driveway wide enough to fit two cars. He used the whole driveway getting the camper into it. He parked the truck and got out to see how he had done.

Amber said, “Well, you did a pretty good job of taking up the whole driveway.”

“I guess it’s a little crooked,” Dexter said.

“For a minute there, I thought you were trying to parallel park it,” Amber said with a smile.

“It seemed that way to me, too,” Dexter said. “I guess I better straighten it out.”

“That would be a good idea,” Amber said.

Dexter climbed back into the truck. Rather than immediately trying to get the camper straightened, he thought about what needed to be done. It took him a minute to get all of the steps laid out in his mind. He started the truck and began his maneuvers. Much to his surprise, things went much better. Amber directed him when to stop.

Once he parked the truck, Amber walked around behind the camper. Dexter looked down the street, and noticed Janet’s car approaching. He wondered what she was doing home in the middle of the day. Then he remembered that she only worked part time, now.

Janet pulled into the driveway waving at Dexter. Her car came to an immediate stop when Amber appeared from behind the camper.

Dexter didn’t know that Janet could move so fast. She was out of her car, and facing Amber, in a fraction of a second. Dexter also did not know that his wife’s face could turn that particular shade of red.

He climbed out of the truck in time to hear Janet say, “Who are you?”

“I’m Amber.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I’m helping Dexter?” Amber answered without much confidence.

There had been a few occasions in her job where she had run into a jealous girlfriend or an angry wife. She knew the best course of action was to get out of the way as quickly as possible. She looked at the truck wondering if there was anyway to get past Janet and into the truck without suffering serious injury.

Dexter muttered, “This is not good.”

“Aren’t you a little young for him?” Janet asked.

“Not really,” Amber answered.

The words were hardly out of her mouth before she realized she had just made a major error.

“He’ll be in adult diapers by the time you get out of high school,” Janet said coldly.

“That’s mean,” Dexter muttered. Then he said, “Hey! I’m not that old.”

Janet slowly turned to look at Dexter. In a frigid voice, she asked, “What is this monstrosity?”

“That’s my camper,” Dexter answered while gesturing toward it.

“Oh, Jesus. You’ve started your mid-life crisis, already. Young bimbos, and expensive toys,” Janet said.

“Actually, the camper and truck were gifts,” Dexter said.

“And the bimbo?”

Dexter said, “She’s not a bimbo. She’s a friend of mine.”

“What bar did you meet her in?” Janet asked.

“I hired her,” Dexter said.

“To do what?” Janet asked.

The way in which Janet asked the question left little doubt what she thought Dexter had hired her to do. The look she gave Amber angered the young woman.

“Uh ... Um ... That’s kind of hard to answer,” Dexter said.

“He hired me to be his wife for a week,” Amber said.

“What!”

Amber stepped forward and said, “Yes. He hired me to be his wife. You see, he was just out of heart surgery, and couldn’t take care of himself, because his ‘wife’ was divorcing him. So he hired me to feed him and to run errands, and to watch over his recovery. You know ... things a loving wife should do ... but then, you wouldn’t know about that.”

Janet turned pale.