Chapter 3

Could I believe all that my wife was telling me? I suppose people were that poor twenty-five years ago, but Neica didn't act as if she grew up poor when I met and married her. I think I would question Karen when I next talked to her. I let all of this pass and asked about what she did in Alaska.

"It is a beautiful place. Sure it is cold and it doesn't forgive mistakes a person makes. What I and my team do is critical. There was a huge oil spill in the year 2006 and inspection has been more important. I know I was only up there for a month, but I can't wait to get back to Prudhoe Bay. Somehow I'll be there on my next rotation."

"Even above taking care of your family?" Her lips pursed and I waited for an answer, but it wasn't forthcoming. I left Neica sitting in her wheelchair, and went into my mother's wing to call my lawyer. "Pete, I need a divorce attorney. I thought I was divorced five years ago, but I find it was never finalized. There are also two kids involved now and I am led to believe they are mine."

"I'll get back to you. Do you want me to get you an appointment?"

"Please, if you would." I was just hanging up when Karen, Mom and the kids came home. Billy and Betty were wired. They had been to the shopping mall and had caught the excitement in the last shopping days before Christmas. Mom kept it going when she had Karen help bring in the Christmas ornaments from where they were stored.

"Okay, all we need now is a Christmas tree. Who wants to go look for a really nice one?" No one wanted to stop for lunch, so I promised I would take the two to McDonalds after we found a tree. The tree they chose was kind of small and had one spot without a branch, but that is the one that they said was just right for them.

Karen sided with the kids, just saying "nothing and no one is perfect." We sat in the restaurant where they could look out at the tree tied on top of the car. I don't think they even knew what they ate for lunch.

I will say when we returned to the house and I brought the tree in its stand into the house, Neica had changed her attitude. She was friendly with me and encouraged the kids to help decorate. Karen noticed it and commented. Then she said to Neica, "This is some different than when we were growing up, isn't it, Neica?"

"Decidedly so." It seemed as if Neica's eyes were on me more than ever this evening. The kids didn't stay up long as they were tired out from the day's exertions. Karen and Mom cleaned up after dinner. They got along as if they had known each other for a long time. I sat reading in the living room while Neica watched something on the tube.

"Aaron, I'm going to call my team in Alaska. They should be in quarters about now. I think they are only two or maybe three hours behind us here."

"Sure, go ahead." Neica went down to her room. I didn't give her anymore thought. Karen and my mother came in and sat down.

"Karen, I understand you are two years older than Neica."

"Yes. My father died when I was only a year old. Mother married soon after, which turned out to be a mistake. Neica's father was a worthless piece of— Well you get the message. Neica came right along on schedule and her father wanted no part of Mom and two kids, so he took off. He may even still be alive. Mom supported us all in the age-old tradition.

"Personally I don't see anything wrong with that. I know not many people feel the way I do. God gave a woman something and it is an asset no matter what anyone says. Only in rare cases can it make you rich, but it can put food on the table and it did keep you from starving. Also it can be a lot of fun." Karen's eyes passed over me, but didn't linger.

"I guess Mom's happiest moment was when Neica birthed the twins. How she loved those two. I can tell you she was always a little disappointed in Neica. You know how people used to say a person was good and his word is his bond. My sister has never understood that. I don't know how many times she promised Mom she would or wouldn't do something, but inevitably she went back on her word.

"In the way of mothers everywhere, she loved Neica as much as she loved me. I never went back to Mom's for anything since I was seventeen. That was when I went out on my own. Except for a little bump in the road now and then, I have had a good life. Neica was different as she kept returning to our mother when things didn't pan out as she expected. She would get into trouble and home she would go.

"Mom and she would talk and Mom would figure out Neica's next move. That is what happened when Aaron and Neica split. I have to say some good came out of the split– meaning Betty and Billy. Neica was going to have an abortion, but Mom talked her out of having the procedure.

"Both she and I are at a crossroads right now. Neica thinks she wants to live and work in Alaska. Personally I don't see how she can with the twins and all. Me, I don't have a job and haven't had one for a few months."

"What did you do for work?"

"I was listed as a secretary. It didn't pay too well, but it kept a roof over my head."

I could tell Mom liked Karen when she said, "Maybe Aaron can find a position for you. My brother owns the company and I can speak to him as well."

"I'll think about it. I do have a few options." Just then Neica came wheeling her chair in. Her face was flushed and she looked happy.

"My team wants me back as soon as possible. They think I can live and work there permanently and not have to rotate back down here. Time wise it is fine, for the job doesn't start until the first of April. I should be well by then. Also I'll have plenty of time to get the kids used to me being absent and having things organized. If I give you custody, then this will solve that particular problem for both of us."

"You want the divorce, I take it?"

"Yes and as soon as possible."

"I'll get on it." Do you have a lawyer to represent you and the children? A judge would not even think about granting a divorce if the care of the kids isn't resolved."

"I'll engage one from the yellow pages."

"Call the American Bar Association. The ABA can recommend one that will fit your needs. You might even get one to do it pro bono if you ask and explain your circumstances."

"Maybe the judge will compel you to pay."

"Maybe. I've already paid once, remember?"

"Yes, but I used that money to support your children for four years. It didn't go very far."

"Let's don't argue. We'll get divorced somehow. Monday would be a good day to call the association." I had a feeling this was going to be expensive for me, but I wanted to move on. I'd get this settled and then I would find a woman who would take care of my kids. I would guess Neica would go after everything she could and I'd be starting from scratch again.

I did have a good position with my uncle, so it wouldn't take me too long to recover from this, especially with me having custody of Betty and Billy. I was still relatively young at twenty-eight.

Neica soon left to get ready for the night. Karen wheeled her down to her room to help and I said to her as she left, "I'll stop by to see if you are still awake when I retire."

An hour later I decided to look in on the two kids. I swear there were smiles on their faces as they lay sleeping. Karen came in behind me. "They are sweet aren't they? I could almost wish I had decided to travel a different road."

"It isn't too late is it?"

"I'm afraid so. If I married, I wouldn't want to keep any secrets from the man who became interested in me. That would reduce my chances by seventy-five percent with anyone who did become interested."

"Twenty-five percent is still pretty good odds."

"In other terms, I'd get turned down three times to get to one chance at happiness."

"So grow a thick skin. I'd say it would be worth it."

"Aaron, I might just try it."

I said goodnight to mother and stopped to wish my wife a goodnight as well. I soon was in my bed. I wasn't able to sleep and my mind was in turmoil. It harked back to when Neica and I had first married. I was so happy at that time, but it went to hell so suddenly.

I wondered why I was so enamored of her charms at the time and we had been happy. She was still a beautiful woman, but now she wasn't trying to make out she was something she wasn't. I had the feeling that her team in Alaska meant more to her than I did. That begged the question, was she in love with one or both of the men. She certainly wanted to get back there with them as soon as she could.

She was willing to turn the care of her two children over to me. She didn't act as if she would miss them to any great extent either. I finally got out of bed and put on a robe. I went down the hall to her room. I quietly eased into the chair by her bed. She was restless.

"Neica are you awake?" I asked quietly.

"Oh Aaron, I didn't hear you come in. Yes, I'm awake. I was lying here thinking about my life. I'm glad you're here. I have something I wanted to ask you."

She paused and I waited for her to continue. "Aaron, would you forgive me? I know I haven't treated you at all well in the past and I suppose I'm not treating you very good now either. I'm feeling guilty for resenting you as I am. Also I'm feeling guilty about my kids too. Believe it or not, I resent them as well. What is wrong with me?"

"I don't think I can answer that. I can say I don't understand you. I suspect you don't really know what you want out of life. A husband doesn't satisfy you. You've proved that. You have two great kids and they don't complete you. I do think there is one thing I can do for you. I have said I want to divorce. That may bring you some measure of happiness just from the fact you don't have to think about dealing with me ever again.

"I would feel better if I gained custody of Billy and Betty and from what you have indicated, that would free you up as well. The thing is there isn't going to be a chance for a do-over. Once these steps are taken we are pretty much done. I don't mean to take the kids out of your life. You get visitation rights because you are their mother. I'm the one that will govern them in all cases, though."

"I think I could go along with that."

"You do amaze me sometimes. You have done a wonderful job with them so far and I can't understand how you could let them go."

"I can't either, but this is what I want."

"Okay, let's move forward in that vein. I'm going to try and convince Karen to take over as their permanent caregiver so the transition will be painless for the kids."

"You could even marry her. That would have things wrapped up in a neat little package."

"That would be something to think about, but only after you and I am divorced. That will be at least six months from now. Also I haven't seen any indication that she wants to change her lifestyle. In the meantime can we be mother and father to Betty and Billy as any normal family would be while you are still here?"

"Yes, of course." I returned to my room and went right to sleep, knowing I would never understand Neica.

The kids were with their mother when I finally got to Neica's room in the morning. "Good morning, Aaron." This came to me with a smile which was an improvement over the usual. "Push me up to breakfast, if you would. The kids and I waited for you."

It was a congenial gathering. After breakfast, Mom mentioned that there was a box of games and toys of mine up in the attic that she had stored many years ago. I took Billy and Betty on a search mission, which was a fun game in itself.

When we came back down, the two kids wanted to play one of my old games. Neica asked me to help her find an attorney so I left them to the game. It was unusual having an estranged husband looking for some lawyer to represent his wife in a suit.

"That's okay. This way maybe you can pass on him and it won't hold up getting this settled." Neica found one who agreed to represent her. He would come to the house and meet with her this afternoon. He warned her that it would be after the first of the year before a suit could be filed. The system would be just about shut down the weeks before and after Christmas.

The time line didn't bother me as much as it did my wife. After all we hadn't lived together for five years and it might be fun to get to know her again just while she was here. She would never, ever be more to me than being my children's mother. It might give me time to figure what she was all about. Wouldn't that be something?

Sunday morning I took the kids to church. I very seldom went, but Mom said it was a good idea to give the kids a little more of an idea about Christmas. We would explain to them there was a reason behind the Christmas holiday and someday they would understand. Neica couldn't go and finally at the last minute Karen said she would like to go with us.

We had Sunday dinner at two. The kids were excited about all the good things Mom had prepared with the help of Karen. We all ate too much and I soon made my way to the living room and the couch. Neica came in sitting in her wheelchair and parked it close by. The kids crawled up beside of me, one on each side of me, and soon I think we were all asleep.

I awoke with Billy and Betty giggling. "Daddy, look at Mommy and Aunty Karen. They both sleep with their mouths open and they snore."

"Shh, that has to be our secret. We don't want to embarrass them do we? I don't think that happens very often. It must be the amount of the roast they ate. Let's go into the other room and watch a Christmas show."

Billy and Betty had never had a normal family relationship. They had only had their mother, their grandmother and a baby sitter to be with. They lost their grandmother before they were old enough to know her well then was replaced by Mrs. Smith, the new sitter.

Now besides their mother, there was me, their Aunt Karen and their new grandmother. We were all trying to outdo each other in making them happy. It was a great time for them.

The two attorneys got together on Monday and came up with an acceptable agreement about the care for the children. Neica declined going after any of my assets, saying I had custody of the kids and would need everything to provide for them. Maybe there was some guilt she was feeling or relief in turning them over for someone else to care for them. Getting a court date was up in the air and we left it to my attorney to try for it as soon as possible.