Chapter 3

Even my dreams seemed to be confusing, disjointed, and very disturbing. I had dreamt that I was laying in bed, the whispered sound of another voice speaking to me, trying to reach out towards me.

"Where am I? Who ... am I?" It seemed to ask.

I wanted to open my eyes, but couldn't. And yet, in the dream when I was able to do so, I found myself looking down at myself. I was Faye, or rather she was me.

"Faye? Faye? Can you hear me?" I asked, seeking ... searching, but there was only darkness now, the echo of her voice fading off into the distance, the sound of my own name being called as it did.

"Howard! Howard! How ... ard!"

I woke up, was it dream? It seemed so real, so bizarre. I could still hear the sound of my name being called, jumping almost three feet off the bed when the phone rang.

"Hello?" I gasped sounding like I'd just been out running.

It was the hospital calling. I had left instructions to be notified the moment there was any change, any change at all.

"Just wanted to let you know," the Doctor began. "Though he is still comatose, there are some good signs that he may be coming out of it sooner than later. There was finger movement early on this morning. And though there hasn't been anything else since then, that's a really good sign. As I had said before, the likelihood of Howard eventually waking up is only a matter of time now. However ... I do like to be cautious in these instances. Until Howard does have full consciousness, we won't know the extent of any additional complications, if any ... until then."

I had hung up the phone after that, knowing that I had a lot of research to do for one thing. Plus, I still needed to pick up my belongings for another. I also wanted to drop by the hospital and check how I was doing first-hand myself. It was going to be a very busy day. I hurriedly dressed, called a cab, and went down to the compound yard where my totaled car was still being held. I had in fact remembered to wrap my hand, almost entirely, making it appear as though it had been hurt in the accident. Signing for my luggage, I was relieved when the guy behind the counter didn't question the odd looking signature, simply looking at my ID and accepting that. What he brought out to me however wasn't complete. I was missing what appeared to be a whole lot of stuff.

"I'm missing an entire bag!" I explained. About the only intact piece of luggage was a small carry on, which had held more of my cosmetics. Little good that would do me, and another duffle bag that at least held a few other things which appeared I could use was about all there was. Inside that was another pair of jeans, couple of tees, and another pleated skirt. Most of my underwear and other personal items were missing.

"Sorry, we gathered up what we could. But there was a lot of wind and such blowing things about. And as far as seeing any other luggage, well ... unless we missed it, or unless someone else came along and found it ... this is all we managed to salvage."

I now knew I'd have to do some shopping, though the thought of having to go out and buy up a bunch of women's intimate apparel wasn't very exciting to me. I still wasn't used to the idea of having to wear a bra as it was, let alone the still strange (giddy) sensation I still got when slipping on a pair of women's panties. Neither of which I was wearing now. And which I was suddenly made aware of as the fat, bald-headed, unkempt, unshaven man behind the counter stood glaring at me, forcing me to take stock of myself. I quickly looked down, twin points too revealing pressing against the thin material of the borrowed tee shirt I had on.

I couldn't believe I was actually offended at some guy staring at my tits. But I was. I soon after left, taking with me what had survived the accident, which still wasn't all that much as I saw it, wondering then if Faye had actually packed that light, though it certainly hadn't felt like it when I loaded the trunk of my car after picking her up from the airport. A lot of it really was missing.

My next stop of course was the hospital. And though I couldn't stay long having left the meter running on the cab, I wanted to drop by long enough to check on things myself. As I'd already been told, I was still resting comfortably, or so it seemed. Ensuring no one was about, I leaned over, whispering. "Faye? It's me ... Howard. Are you in there? Can you hear me Faye? Can you hear me?" I waited for some sign of recognition, anything. But there was nothing. Once again stopping by the nurses' station, I left the same instructions I had left with them before. To call me at the sign of any change, no matter how slight or insignificant. I returned home knowing that I now had even more work to do. Research on the computer to see if there was anyone else who had experienced the same phenomenon that I was. IF there was anything out there at all on the subject.

And the second thing of course. I needed to buy a whole bunch of new underwear.

I signed on my computer, and luckily for me ... I knew the password of course. I then Googled everything and anything that was even remotely related. Most of the things really having nothing to do with what I was looking for, though one or two others hinting at something that possibly could have. Until I realized after reading further, that most of that was more mythic in nature, past beliefs, and somewhat religious symbolisms. I was having very if little luck until I stumbled across a rather bizarre link, something about it just catching my eye, causing me to click on it and read further. That led me to a blog, someone named "Chris Smith," who had set up some sort of a web-site for men and women both who all appeared to have basically one thing in common. Gender identity confusion of one kind or another. Though most of what I read was pretty much along the lines of what you'd expect to find. Men and women both either going through the process of having a sex-change, or thinking about it. Not exactly what I was looking for or hoping to find, until I followed another small link, as part of Chris's biography. That one caused me to hold my breath for a moment. There was a small quote beneath his name. It read. "He is me ... and then. Who am I?" I read further, and though it didn't go into specifics about what I was hoping it would, there was enough there that hinted at something deeper, more profound. I decided to take a chance, sending off an email to the address listed for contacting. At first I wasn't sure what to write, what to send in hopes that Chris would respond back to me as quickly I hoped for. I sent: She is me...

I sat back trying not to think about any of this, not yet. It was almost too overwhelming for me as it was. And ... I had another problem facing me now too. I was running low on cash. I had just a little over a hundred on me, with no access to my own account, or credit cards. Faye of course had a couple, but there again, the signature thing was apt to cause me problems there. I wasn't sure how lucky I'd be in being able to actually use them for one thing, nor did I know what her balance was, or limits. Using them would be something I would do only as a last resort. Unfortunately, I was going to have to do something about buying a few things either way, like it or not. And without having access to a ride, nor the luxury of taking a cab again, I had no other choice but to go next door and knock, hoping my new found friends ... old friends, could possibly help me.

Sharon of course had already gone to work, but Jillian was up and about, and more than happy to take me out to do some much needed shopping, though I fibbed a little in telling her that my credit cards were pretty close to being maxed out, so I'd have to be very careful and wise in using them.

"No worries," she smiled. "I know where we can go to get a BIG discount. Friend of ours works at a woman's lingerie store. That's where Sharon and I always go whenever we need anything. I'm sure once we explain to her what happened to you, she'll be more than happy to help." I was delighted to hear that, though on the drive over to the store, Jillian then informed me that they had in fact all gotten together on occasion in times past. Part of which was a repayment of sorts for all the "free stuff" they got, in addition to the discounted merchandise items. "Don't worry, you'll like her. She's really sexy, and very cute ... a bit of a wild side on her yes, and a few kinks ... but nobody better who can help us out here. Trust me."

I'd always hated that saying. "Trust me." There was always a catch, some hidden warning that always proved itself out, though when it did, it was usually too late. Even so, I followed Jillian into the small, yet well displayed lingerie store, though realizing as we did, it wasn't just about that. Aside from the expected obvious, most of their stuff was almost TOO sexy, TOO revealing, not to mention the fact that a back area of the store appeared to cater to mostly "adult toys and novelty items."

"You brought me to a sex store?" I asked after walking in, taking a brief look around. "All I need is a couple of pairs of normal panties, and maybe another bra or two," I told her. "I'm certainly not looking for anything that's crotch less, or edible! That's for dam sure!" I stated. Jillian laughed, still leading me by the hand further into the store.

"I'm sure we'll be able to find you something you can wear, even if it is just a little bit sexy. You look good in sexy. You are sexy. And like I said, Samantha will think you're sexy too."

I noticed there had been only one other person in the store when we came in, and 'he' had come walking out of the back adult area, leaving shortly after our arrival. One guy, middle aged appeared to be attending the register just outside of that area. He looked up towards Jillian and I as we passed, heading around the other side to the lingerie area. He smiled, even waved at Jillian, as she returned the wave calling out. "Samantha?"

"Stock room," he continued to smile pointing off in that direction. "She'll be pleased to see you I'm sure," he grinned even more broadly. To which Jillian responded under her breath, well out of range of his hearing her.

"Yeah, so are you ... I'm sure," she said.

"What was all that about?" I asked only once we were well out of eyesight too.

"Oh, nothing really. He and Samantha just sort of have a mutual understanding is all. We've been here before obviously, and sort of know what's up whenever we come in to do a little bargaining. Nothing to worry about really, Sam will handle it."

"Sam?"

"Yeah, short for Samantha. That's what she really goes by. You'll see when you meet her."

As though we worked there ... Jillian led me into the back, calling out to Sam as we did that.

"Back here!" Came the reply. Seconds later we entered what was obviously some sort of receiving area, Samantha ... or Sam, was unboxing a few cartons, putting things on hangers when we came in. "Jill!" She said enthusiastically in greeting, coming over to not only hug ... but kiss Jillian the moment they saw one another. Sam was an interesting looking character. Almost pixyish. Thin framed, an inch or two under five feet if she was lucky, short bright white hair with a strand of it died purple that seemed to hang down over one eye, obscuring it almost completely the way it was cut. She was wearing what appeared to be a tight black leotard, almost flat chested by the looks of it, with just two obvious well rounded bumps pressing against the tight-stretched material. She wore what appeared to be a men's pair of red and white polka dot boxers over that however, basically completing her outfit. She was obviously gothic too. Dark eyes, black lipstick and fingernails, with a black mouth kiss tattoo on one side of her neck.

"Hey Sam ... want to introduce you to someone, who needs your help," Jillian said now handing me off to Sam. "This is Faye," she said as I extended my hand in greeting, and though taking it, Sam merely drew me in even closer, using that as leverage to do so, thus embracing me in another close hug instead along with a kiss on the mouth that caught me by surprise as she lingered there for a lot longer than just a moment.

"Easy enough to remember," she smiled, stepping back still holding my hand in hers, looking me up and down. I looked at her inquisitively, though Jillian, now Jill ... answered that for me. She calls everyone by an abbreviated version of their name. Here I'm Jill, same as she's Sam ... not Samantha. Sharon of course is Shar..."

"Oh," I said, still not sure I understood why she did that, but finding her welcoming, bubbling personality quite intriguing.

"So ... what're we here to get?" She asked. Jill explained, quickly filling in details. I noticed that even as she did that, she seemed to abbreviate even the details, getting to the reason for our being there without a whole lot of extra explanation. Maybe it was the way Sam operated, fast and furious, seemingly in full understanding for the purpose of this visit. "Let's see what we can do about fixin' ya up," she grinned, though I noticed there was a look that was passed quickly back and forth between the two of them. "Might have ta, be nice to the boss though ... ya know? Shouldn't take too long though, been a few days now as it is. But he's pretty primed at the pump now judging by the way he was acting around me this morning already. And especially now knowing that you're here. Almost willing to bet, he's got it out already."

"Got what out?" I asked whispering to Jillian as we followed Sam back into the store area. Jillian laughed. You'll see. Don't worry though, Bob's basically pretty harmless, never given Sharon or I anything to worry about since we've been coming here, as long as you can put up with him standing there watching anyway.

"Watching?"

She didn't have time to answer however as moments later the three of us stood there in front of where Bob was still sitting. I noticed as we stood there, his hand indeed appeared to be moving about, even though it was still well hidden beneath the counter.

"OK, I need at least two bras ... and three or four pairs of panties," she said looking at him. He leaned back in his chair looking at the three of us.

"That's gonna cost," he said. "And nothing off the wall either," he added to that.

"What's the wall?" I asked in hushed tones.

"Their very best, most expensive stuff," Jillian informed me. "The display goods. If you see something you like or want to try on ... then Sam goes and gets it in your size, and brings it in to you. Store policy, she has to be in there with you while you try it on to avoid any shop-lifting or pretend exchanges that weren't purchased here, especially for the more expensive stuff."

I had no response to that.

"You gonna be good with that?" Sam asked turning back around to ask us. Might could negotiate a bit better ... or more..."

"She's pure les..." Jillian answered for me. "Won't mind being looked at, but touched ... no." Sam grinned, nodded her head.

"Two bras, half a dozen pairs of panties, and one of those off the wall. For that ... you get to watch us for a bit, and then I'll finish you off with a hand job." Bob thought about it. "Make it a blow-job, and it's a deal."

"No cum in the mouth then, not for that," she countered.

"On your tits then."

"For that ... she gets a bra off the wall."

Once more he sat thinking about it. "OK, deal. Early lunch today then. Go turn the sign and lock the door." He stood up, coming around the counter as Sam scurried off towards the door before any other customers came walking in. Sure enough, he had a hard on, his thick massive dick sticking straight out. He led us into the adult novelty area, and I noticed there was another door leading through that into another area.

"The back office," Jillian informed me as Sam just then caught up to us. "We've been in there a couple of times before," she added.

Sam was already peeling the top of her leotard off by the time we had entered his somewhat cluttered office. Not too surprisingly, there was a leather couch sitting off to one side, about the only thing that wasn't cluttered.

"I'm not sure I feel real comfortable about this," I whispered worriedly.

"Relax. You don't have to really do much of anything. He'll want to see your tits, but beyond that, it'll be mostly Sam going down on me while you play with hers and mine a little, something like that. He'll get off on watching her licking me. After I get off ... which I always do, she'll finish him, then we'll go back and do our shopping. Shouldn't take more than twenty minutes or so, give or take a few." I was surprised when Jillian suddenly stripped completely down, like me ... she hadn't worn anything beneath her jeans and blouse either, though obviously she had come prepared for this. I just happened to be that way. I stood off to one side, nervously, though finally pulling my tee up and over my head, revealing my breasts. I was surprised to find myself a bit shy and nervous, until Sam came over, perfect height for her, as she now cupped and latched onto one of my breasts, sucking it. Already I could hear Bob's breathing getting harder as he sat behind his desk, no doubt busy jerking himself off while he watched us.

"Come on baby. Come lick my pussy. It's horny for you."

"And I'm horny for it too!" Sam responded, reluctantly leaving off my tit, though she still held my hand, drawing me over towards the couch with her. "Play with mine while I'm licking her," she informed me. "Two reasons..." she then whispered. "One ... I like it. And two ... Bob will get worked up really, really fast the more the three of us do together," she winked at me conspiratorially. "Get the picture?"

I did, nodded back at her, and began fondling her sweet small, very perky breasts.

I was honestly surprised to find myself becoming quite aroused, and now starting to get off on this. Even when I heard Bob suddenly stand up, walking over to stand next to us there on the couch. Sam was still hungrily licking Jillian's pussy. I had been asked, and thus managed to pull down Sam's leotard completely where it now lay all bunched up around her ankles. I was finger-fucking her twat, one ... two and finally three fingers as she instructed me to do the wetter and wetter that she got. It was also oddly arousing to look up, watching Bob who had removed his own pants, though still wearing a shirt, he stood fisting his rather impressive looking cock. It was now making a lot of very slick, slippery sounds, much like I very often did to myself when I once had a dick. Though the sounds I was making in Sam's pussy where just as wet and slick sounding.

"Fuck that's hot," he groaned deeply looking on. "I'll throw in one of my best negligees if you'll fuck Sam with a strap on," he urged us all. "While she sucks me," he then added to that. Sam looked back over her shoulder towards me, questioning. I looked past her to Jillian.

"Up to you," she said non-commitally. "But I certainly could use a new one," she implied letting me know that it would go much in the way of repaying certain favors here. I felt like I owed it to her. And besides ... I actually did want to try doing that. We hadn't gotten around to doing so the night before, and now I was thinking about it again ... curious.

"Yeah, ok ... sure. Why not?" I actually answered seeing the delightful look of surprise on both Sam and Jillian's faces upon hearing that.

"A new one," Sam then said looking at Bob. "And this one ... I get to keep!"

"Ok, ok ... but the three of you are robbing me blind today!" He complained half-heartedly. "And I knew then, he was getting his money's worth, even more so than we probably were. Sam finished pulling off the rest of her clothes and then ran bare-assed naked back into the novelty section of the shop, returning a few minutes later with a brand new package, ripping it open.

"Get the cleaning solution and lube," she told Bob. He turned heading back to his desk, opening a drawer, and handing her a couple of bottles along with some clean towels. Sam was quick about her business, handing me the contraption a moment or two later. "Ever tried one of these?"

"Nope ... first time using one this way," I stated. Once again, she seemed to understand my statement.

"Cool. First time for everything I always say. Ok Bob, soon as she's in me ... you're up."

Jillian had slid off the couch by this time and helped me to secure this interesting contraption on me once I had also finished undressing. The three of us all now entirely naked as Bob seated himself on the couch, Sam leaning over, already starting to fondle and suck his cock while I stood behind her, Jillian helping to guide my fake prick into the opening of her pussy. I had no misconceptions about this either, or so I thought. About to fuck my first cunt as a woman, I knew going in that I wouldn't be feeling or sensing it the way I would be doing as a man. This was about her, her pleasure, and me giving it. And Bob getting it watching me as I did that, as I fucked her.

Well ... that and the blowjob she was now giving him too of course.