Chapter 7

After some friendly fun, Amanda felt a lot better, but her main problem wasn't solved. She still needed someone to co-sign her fabbing request. But she no longer thought it was impossible. After all, her supervisor didn't have any objections to the project as such, so there was nothing wrong with her work. The rest were details.

On her way home, as she was wondering what meal to make for herself and Laura, she thought maybe her roommate could help her out with this. She knew she had a proven record as a negotiator. Since it would be a big favour to ask, she decided to cook something a little more elaborate this time, to put her in a good mood and, hopefully, make her feel a bit in her debt. She wasn't certain, but she thought she had all the necessary ingredients for a mushroom curry, and she should be able to arrange a simple dessert. Perhaps a sabayon.

The kitchen was not very full yet, so Amanda had plenty of space to prepare the meal. She had the right ingredients for both dishes, and she started by preparing the dessert, so it would cool down as she cooked the main meal. Some of the other students made appreciative noises, and wondered if there was any special occasion, but she simply told them she was in the mood for a sweet.

As she was about to finish cooking the curry, Laura entered the kitchen. She looked around, and smiled when she saw Amanda.

"Will it be ready soon?" she asked.

"Oh," said Amanda, startled, "you're here already! It's almost done. Could you get us some clean dishes, please?"

"Sure." Amanda checked the shelves and got two dishes out. "Will these do?"

"Get two bowls for dessert", said Amanda. "It's still too warm, but it will be ready when we're done with this", she said pointing at the food.

"Dessert? That's nice."

"I hope you like it. My father has quite a sweet tooth, and I learned some of his quicker dishes."

"That's definitely more than I can do. I just hope I don't end up spoiled", she said as Amanda served the curry, as she looked for clean dessert dishes. They were a bit harder to find, as so many people used them for snacks and cakes, but she managed to get a couple which would fit Amanda's standards. She'd noticed how she carefully checked them every time, which she entirely approved of, especially since she'd eat food cooked by her.

"I hope you'll enjoy the meal", said Amanda, sitting opposite Laura. "It's good to have some real food once in a while, you know."

"You won't here me complaining. It's just not a skill I have, and I don't have the patience for it. Not that they didn't try to teach me, but it was never something I wanted to do. But when it appears on my dish by magic", she said smiling, "it's great."

"Well," said Amanda, "a bit less than magic, or a bit more, I guess. I know what you mean though. Sometimes I'm too tired and hungry to want to do this sort of thing. Most days, really. I still want to remember that food can be a pleasure, not just a necessity."

"So you had a good day today? Since you were up to doing this, I mean."

"A good day?" Amanda hesitated, and sighed. "No, not really. This is more of a ... way to relax, I guess. Things haven't gone as I expected."

"Would you like to tell me about it?" asked Laura. Her tone was kinder than Amanda had hoped for, and it almost brought tears to her eyes. Her cuddle had calmed her down some, but nothing had been fixed, and she'd been turning things over and over in her head as she cooked, worrying herself silly. Finding gentle concern where she had expected indifference, or at best curiosity, was in its way as disconcerting as her professor's hostile reaction, coming out of nowhere.

"That bad?" asked Laura.

"I'd very much like to talk about it", said Amanda, "I could do with your ... advice, I think. Just, not here."

"I'll do my best to help. Though it can't have been all bad if it drove you to make such a nice meal", said Laura, smiling.

Amanda began to laugh, but couldn't avoid a few tears. Her roommate would help her and it would all be alright, somehow. Laura might not have been the best at dealing with people, but she was clearly good at getting what she wanted, and she cared about her enough to give her a hand. It would all work out.

"Thank you for that. Hearing that today means a lot to me, and I'm pleased you like my cooking", she said. "Oh, now I'm being silly". She wiped her teary eyes, and blew her nose. "It must be the spices."

"Yes, you've made a hot curry", said Laura, playing along.

"What about you, any news?"

"Nothing useful. I've had to step back a bit, work out some new protocols. I've been throwing the entire statistical inventory at the problem, but it's more in frustration than hope. There were some minor improvements, but the fundamental problem's still there. I don't think it will yield to random brute force, either. I need a better model, and I need to build it by knowing what's going on. That requires not just more data, but the right sort of it. So it's probably going to take a while to crack, assuming I ever manage to get a handle on it."

"That bad?" asked Amanda. "It seems this wasn't our day. Still, you have a plan. I can't imagine you'll be stuck for long." She'd like to have that much herself.

"I guess if it were an easy problem there would be little point in solving it. You know how frustrating it is to have a perfect model that only works in really narrow conditions, though? It's like nature telling me that what I'm doing is possible, but I'm too dumb to work it out. I'll admit it makes me rather irritable, and I have to be careful not to take it out on my subjects. Or on innocent lab equipment. Or on my supervisor, which for all her faults seems to be doing all she can to help now. At least I can amuse myself with the thought her girlfriend, or whatever she was, must be having her own frustrations."

"Pretty sure she is", said Amanda. "Aren't you a little vindictive though? If your supervisor's working out, why not forgive and forget? Perhaps she'd do even better if she could get some ... release, you know."

"I can't believe you said that. Aside from the ethics of it--"

"Ethics?" asked Amanda. "We're not schoolchildren. I can't say it's the brightest thing I've seen, socially, for a professor and a student to get involved, but do you really think it's unethical? I'm sure she's not getting any preferential treatment. If for no other reason, because it would eventually come out. In fact, looked at the other way, it must be pretty hard for a student to be in that situation."

"Well, as I said, aside from the ethical issues, which I'm not so sure about ... Whatever else you think, she was irresponsible!" Laura was almost shouting, and Amanda shushed her before Laura revealed everything to the whole room. "She didn't do her duty. I'll find it very hard to forgive that, and I won't pretend I don't find some satisfaction in imagining their reaction at being separated, just as she isolated herself from me. It's fitting."

"What can I say? I can't be that tough to people. What if they really love each other?" asked Amanda. They were done with the curry, so she picked up the bowls and served dessert.

"Well," said Laura, as she tasted the dessert. "Hmm", she mumbled. "This is good stuff", she said, changing the topic. "I could live with eating this way more often."

"I'll try to do something more elaborate from time to time", said Amanda, who couldn't avoid feeling pleased. "I didn't know you appreciated food. It seemed to me you just ate to live, but now I do, I'll make sure to give a bit more thought to it. Mind you, I don't think I'll be able to make dessert every day, or anywhere near it."

"Oh, I wasn't suggesting that ... I didn't mean you had to..."

"A simple 'thank you' will do, you know?" said Amanda, who felt she'd got the better of her roommate for once.

"Thank you, then."

Both girls took their time in eating the dessert, but eventually there wasn't more to scrape off the bowls, and by unspoken agreement, they both washed their dishes. Laura seemed a bit surprised when Amanda joined her, but she didn't object, and Amanda felt like helping out. It made her feel so useful and wanted to do things for her, something in her going soft and yielding, that she decided she would help out with the washing up unless Laura brought it up herself.

As they got back to their room, Laura glanced at her console, but decided it was too late to continue working and, after changing into her night clothes, lay down on her bed instead. Amanda always made sure not to look as her roommate changed, so as not to make her feel awkward, though it was sometimes difficult. She took off her own street clothes and got comfortable, lying on her own bed. They both lay in silence for a couple of minutes, and Amanda was hoping Laura would ask about her troubles. She didn't want to bother her roommate if she wasn't in the mood to listen, though she didn't seem to be ready for sleep either. At last, Laura spoke.

"So, you said you could do with my advice. I'm happy you think I can help, though I'm not so sure myself. Certainly not if it's something on hardware!" She chuckled. "Still, if you want someone to talk to, I'm here for you."

Amanda told Laura the whole story of her meeting with her supervisor. She didn't exagerate, but didn't keep anything to herself either. She managed not to cry, at least not much, and she felt prouder of it than she thought she should. Keeping her wits together shouldn't have felt like an achievement at her age, and yet it somehow did. Laura was a good listener, didn't interrupt much, and even gasped once or twice.

"That's a tough one", she said. "No wonder you're so shocked." She thought for a few seconds and rearranged herself on the bed. "You know he's essentially right. Not about the way he handled things, that was clearly harrassment. I mean about the substance of the issue."