Chapter 13: Interview with a Preacher

From the other side of the one-way glass separating the studio from its audience, Melanie Lucas' fury continued to grow into a towering volcano of ire, needing only the right word to unleash a pyroclastic flow upon the unsuspecting Very Reverend Matthew Calhoun.

"So we formed the Christian Democratic Party, to bring good solid Christian values to this election, and after our inevitable victory, to the system and beyond!" The Reverend was in full fire-and-brimstone preacher mode now, certain that he was inspiring crowds from the inner planets to the moons of the gas giants.

"And what of other systems?" Dorothy challenged. "What of Spica?"

"We have a very efficient and well-equipped military. We can conquer that planet of sexual deviants quickly enough, but first things first: we must take back control of Solaria!"

Lucy Yamashita turned to her cabinet and asked rhetorically, "This clown had control of Solaria, when exactly?" Around her, the laughter rose in volume again.

TK, seated beside Lucy and just as amused, observed, "I don't think that'll go over well with the voters."

Dorothy regarded her victim with incredulity. "You would invade a star system? One with which we have at the moment friendly relations? That we have a trading agreement with? That is busy refitting our Navy's warships with modernized environmental control systems?"

Sensing he was standing on thin ice but unaware he'd already plunged through to depths far over his head, Matthew tried to make his voice sound the very soul of reason. "Only if necessary to recover their morality. I would hope that they could be converted more gently instead."

"Convert? Convert to what?" Mentally Dorothy added, "Here, have another shovel, dig yourself a deeper hole."

Matthew had apparently never heard of the old adage, "When you find yourself in a hole, stop digging." He looked at her with sorrowful eyes. "Well, to the One True Religion, of course."

"Islam?" she guessed mischievously.

"No, no, no. Christianity."

"Any particular kind of Christianity? Would Roman Catholicism do, or Methodist? There are Christian naturists, you know."

He sniffed in disdain. "True Christianity. Lunar Reformed Baptist, of course, worshipping the Holy Quadrinity. Those others are fake versions of the One True Church, apostates all."

"But the Lunar Reformed Baptists consist of just one church, doesn't it – the Crystalline Cathedral?"

"Ah, but we have reach across the solar system. We are far more powerful than you can ever dream."

"Considering you had less than five thousand contributors last year – per the taxation authority's records – do you stand by that statement of how powerful you are?" Dorothy asked sweetly.

"I certainly do," Matthew responded proudly. "For every parishioner tithing, there are a hundred too impoverished by the President's economic platform to be able to tithe a penny. We refuse to take from those who earn less than the minimum wage."

"Interesting that your tithing system has no way of checking the income of a parishioner," Dorothy observed in a throwaway line. "Now, isn't it true that the Christian Democrats consist solely of yourself and Buzz Brenner, of Bren-Cable?"

"He is an important part of the team, but he's just one man. We have many others, candidates, campaign volunteers, supporters," Matthew responded indignantly.

"Oh?" Dorothy asked, her face a mask. Either he was obfuscating, or he was utterly innocent of the shenanigans his partner had been up to. She was betting the latter. "The statistics from the latest surveys show your political support is minimal. Less than one percent, in fact."

The Conservative Party Whip sat back in his chair. "His is going to be the shortest political career in modern history," he prognosticated, pointing at the posturing preacher.

Matthew rose to the implied challenge. "Our campaign is in its earliest stages as yet. After the electorate has had a chance to consider us as a serious option, those numbers will begin to change!"

"Perhaps, but a review of the list of Christian Democratic candidates for the Legislature reveals that each one is an employee of Bren-Cable or a subsidiary thereof. Their campaigns have been funded by a generous donation from those subsidiaries, and for the most part without any other donations whatsoever. In fact," she added, turning her guns onto the hapless Bartholomew Carver, "your consulting agency relies on Brenner News Network exclusively for its revenues, does it not?"

Bart made strangling noises, clearly out of his depth. He had long realized the existence of the edge of the precipice he was standing on, but was helpless to avoid the danger.

Matthew sputtered in indignation. "I'm certain there have been other donations!"

Dorothy's attention swung back to the rattled reverend. "Yes, there have been major contributions from the coffers of your own Crystalline Cathedral, in violation of both the Election Finance Law and the Religious Institution Funding Law. I believe the Election Commission, the Department of Taxation and the Department of Commerce will all be interested in that little detail, don't you?" Dorothy cocked her head inquisitively.

Back at the Conservative Party War Room, the Conservative Party Whip sat back admiringly. "You know, there are times when I just love that woman."

Dorothy went on, remorselessly forcing Matthew into silence. "And Brenner News Network has been actively sabotaging Tom Lucas' campaign, haven't they? The fiasco with the yacht Icarus, the vessel that was transporting Tom Lucas around Solaria. That was entirely Buzz Brenner's doing, because he owns that yacht. Right?"

Matthew's gaze swivelled to his running mate. Bart's face had lost all of its colour, as he tried to bury himself into the floor.

"Well?" Dorothy grilled Bart. "Let's see the official record of Icarus." Beside them, a video screen lit up with the requisite record. "The registration of Icarus shows it to be owned by a numbered company." Corporate records replaced that of the ship. "In fact, it is that company's sole asset. That numbered company is owned by Ceres Transportation, which in turn is 100% owned by Triton Communications Satellites Incorporated, which in turn is a wholly owned subsidiary of Bren-Cable. Which is owned by three more holding companies before we finally get to ... one Buzz Brenner."

Matthew was amazed – he honestly had no idea about the cause of Tom's politically disastrous tour, and had no clue as to the ownership of the private yacht. He had also not heard the details of Tom's communications problems.

Dorothy couldn't believe her luck. Here was a political pelt on her wall that was big and quite colourful.

"And what of that video that started this off? The one stolen off the server belonging to the school that the Lucas' daughter, Melanie goes to?"

"We had nothing to do with that unfortunate incident, but if you are going to act in an indecent and immoral fashion, you can expect such,"

"So your position is that you had nothing to do with that? That neither you nor anyone involved in your campaign broke into the server of a state-owned and operated high school, and absconded with a video of a young lady practising her diving technique in what is popularly referred to as 'nature's swimsuit'?" Dorothy Chandler asked, a glint in her eye – a glint unnoticeable to the television audience, and unnoticed by the preacher. "I just want to be sure we've got this right," she added, sounding friendly and reasonable.

In the war rooms of both the Conservative and Liberal Democratic parties, the observers were aware from painful experience that when Dorothy Chandler sounded at her most calm and reasonable, that meant she was about to spring a well-laid trap. They leaned forward in eager anticipation.

Buzz' staff were also aware that Chandler was now about to strike her cobra's blow. They leaned toward the video screen in an attitude of worry.

Beside Calhoun, Bart paled. As with the unholy glint in Chandler's eye, the innocent Very Reverend, in full "sermon" mode, took no notice. "Absolutely. I would never countenance such illegal activity. Although I have to agree that it was quite fortuitous for us to see what kind of licentiousness that the daughter of the Conservative candidate engages in. Undoubtedly it was some public spirited vigilante who decided to take the law into his or her hands."