Chapter 12: Changes

Christine

What is happening to me? I feel like someone dropped my life in a blender and hit frappé. Three weeks ago my life was ... well, not perfect, but it was at least on track. Having buried Brian safely in the past and decided that the only one I could count on to get me through flight school was myself, I was once more focused on saving toward that goal. The one advantage of flying all over the country is that the company pays for everything. Besides rent, my biggest expenses were car insurance and my cat. My home diet consisted mostly of yogurt, canned soup, and salad. I only bought what groceries I was going to need when I was home, so kitty litter ran neck and neck with food for top household expenses. I didn't keep anything more perishable than a box of cold cereal in the cupboard. I was also careful to always empty out the milk and take out the trash on my way out. Mrs. Albertson's ten-year-old daughter, Kelly, came by every other day to play with Widget, clean her litter box, and make sure she had fresh water. I pay her twenty dollars a week, probably too much for what she actually does, but when you consider the greatest service she does for me, it's money well spent.

I like Kelly; she's a good kid, and she does a great job with Widget, but the greatest thing she's done for me is to show me what I don't want in life: To be a single mother.

I'd seen the way Kelly and her mom struggled from paycheck to paycheck month in and month out. I felt sorry for the little girl, coming home to an empty house almost every day. Her mom did her best for her, but she just didn't have the time to really raise her daughter. Kelly and I talked about it sometimes when she came by to play with Widget while I was home. As with most only-children of single parents, she was grown-up for her age, and one of the things she seemed to like best about me was that I didn't treat her like a little kid. It took me by surprise when she asked me about sex the first time. She had only been nine at the time, and I had tried to refer her to her mother, but she made it clear that her mother didn't want to talk about the subject. I think her mom felt guilty for sticking Kelly in this life because of her youthful mistakes. I was really surprised to discover that the subject had come up as a result of school. I guess they are starting earlier these days, teaching sex-ed I mean. Of course the kids start earlier as well. It's always amazed me that they never seemed to be able to see any correlation between the two. Heck, we didn't get it until sixth grade when I was in school, but I knew two girls who had been active within a week of the classes. Simple curiosity seems to be beyond the comprehension of the school system. As terrible as it was to have two of your friends having sex at twelve years of age — eleven in Carrie's case, her first time coming a week before her birthday — if nothing else, watching what they went through as a result of their hasty decisions had provided me excellent motivation. Sixth graders aren't known for their discretion, and within a week everyone knew what they'd done. Carrie was lucky; her dad was in the military, and they moved away the next year. Alicia wasn't so lucky. Being branded as the school slut in sixth grade was a burden I wouldn't wish on anyone.

I managed to resist temptation all the way through until my senior year.

I shared all this with Kelly; including the fact that even though I was on birth control pills from my sophomore year, I still waited, and when I finally decided to go for it, I still insisted the boys always wear condoms. Mrs. Anderson came to see me after about the third talk we'd had and thanked me for talking so candidly to her daughter. She had felt bad about not talking to her, but she was afraid that Kelly would get the wrong idea and think that her mother regretted, or even resented, having her. I asked her to think about her life growing up and how she had felt when the adults excluded her from their conversations. I asked her point blank if her life would be different if someone had actually talked to her when she was Kelly's age. The next time I saw Kelly, she thanked me for talking to her mom. Apparently they were talking about all kinds of things now, and it had really helped to draw them closer.

After high school had come my brief attempt at college. It quickly became apparent that there was no way I was going to be able to afford higher education without going into serious debt. I then opted for flight attendant school and took a relatively small — ten thousand dollar — student loan to pay for it. I hadn't gotten far before I realized that what I really wanted was that seat up in the front of the plane. So I worked hard, doubled up my payments to pay off my loan, and still managed to stick a little away toward my goal. I met Brian in FA school and fell for his quick wit and disarming manner. We got an apartment together only three months after we started dating and kept it after graduation. It went downhill from there.

After he broke my heart, I swore I would never put myself in that position again, reset my sights on my goal, and started re-building my savings. My life had been nicely ordered from then on. Work, save money, and don't get attached to any distractions. I stayed clear of anyone and everyone that might pull me away from my goal. My sex life had revolved around Bob — my Battery Operated Boyfriend — and the occasional business traveler. And that's all it was, sex; no commitment, no attachment, just an occasional roll with something that bought me a nice dinner and didn't take batteries, two of Bob's greater failings. Whenever possible, I stuck to married men in order to minimize the chances of someone getting too attached. Yeah, I know I was hurting someone somewhere, but it's not like I was pursuing them. Deep inside, where no one can see, I'm keeping my fingers crossed that Karma is a myth, but just in case, I promised myself that if what goes around ever comes around, I'll try to be understanding about it. Easy to say, huh?

And then I met David.

My first thought upon seeing him was that he was too young, but then he took a seat in Business, and I was forced to reclassify him. Calling me over to help him with the phone had forced me to change it yet again. It takes a certain level of maturity to recognize that you don't know everything, and that it's a lot faster and easier to just ask for help. It was one of the tests I had come to rely on. If their ego would allow them to ask for help, they were worth a second look.

David was confusing from the first, hitting my personal radar all over the place: old, young, sweet, serious, flirtatious but still polite, and all seemingly at the same time. I just couldn't get a clear signal from him, so naturally he piqued my curiosity. Then he asked me to take him shopping of all things, and that set off my gay-dar. I couldn't believe I could have so totally misread him, but then he assured me that wasn't the case. At the same time, he made it clear that he wasn't stalking my panties either. I couldn't decide if I should be flattered, disappointed, or angry, eventually settling on being flattered that he didn't think I was that kind of girl. Then the limo showed up, and I braced myself for a wild night. But instead of rushing me into the hotel room, he hands over our luggage to the hotel staff and takes me out to help him shop for clothes, just like he said. What the hell was going on? Still, he had promised me dinner, so life could be worse. Booking me my own room at the Bellagio wasn't bad either. Then we got back to the hotel, and I almost wet myself when they took us up to that palatial room. It was right out of one of those lifestyles shows.

Then he makes me promise to behave myself, or he won't get in the tub? And then, then he calls his sister to have her assure me that his intentions are nothing but honorable? Are you kidding me? I was so horny I could barely breathe; the last thing I wanted his intentions to be was honorable. Thank god his sister was on my side. The rest of the night was absolute magic. He took me to Cirque du Soleil, and 'O' was everything I had heard it was, and then when we got back to the room ... Oh my God! No more mixed signals, no more doubts. David was unbelievable in bed; of course he'd been pretty good in the hot tub too, but I had never been with a man like David. Totally uninhibited, you would never believe he was only twenty-two, and did he know his way around a woman's body! He seemed to know exactly what I wanted at every turn. I'd never come so hard and so often in my life.

And then he found Bob, my vibrator. I thought I was going to die when he tripped over my carry-on and it fell out, but he just picked it up and took it with him to the bathroom. By the time he got back, he knew what all the controls were for. Yeah, I sprang for the whole package when I got him, and my little Bob is what you would call 'full featured' — except for the whole buying dinner thing...

"This is an interesting piece of equipment," he had said. "I've never actually seen one up close before; why don't you show me how it works?"

Did I mention he's a fast learner?

So now here I am, packing up my life and moving to Las Vegas, where I'm going to be going to flight school, for free! All because David was offended by the way my asshole of a pilot was treating me after spending the night with him. I thought the flight crew was going to throw me out without a parachute when they found out I had named them all as witnesses in a harassment suit. I couldn't say anything because I promised not to, but I felt a lot better after the other two guys in the cockpit both called me and thanked me for filing on Hardwick. I told them that it wasn't me, but they said it didn't matter if it was me that filed; I had to go along, or the suit wouldn't have a chance, and it was about time someone put that prick in his place.

Lizzy was everything I had expected after talking on the phone. Her roommate Amber was a bit of a surprise; especially as it very quickly became clear that there was more to their relationship. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't surprised they were, you know, 'together'; David had made it clear that Lizzy played both sides of the fence. I just wasn't sure what to expect when she said she was bringing Amber along.

Then I got the real shock when Lizzy came clean and told me the truth about her and David. At first I was angry, but ... I don't know what it was, but the more we talked the more I found myself agreeing with her. A second day traveling with the two of them had made it clear that there was more to her relationship with Amber. I'm pretty sure I wasn't supposed to, but I heard her call Lizzy 'Mistress' twice. I had already figured it out by then, but that pretty much made it official. Amber was a Submissive, and Lizzy was her Dominant; no wonder she didn't have a problem with me and David.

Then that asshole had walked into the restaurant. My first thought was to try to protect the girls, and I'd done everything I'd been trained to do in a situation like that; but this wasn't an airplane, and I didn't have the TSA backing me up.

When Amber threw him out the front doors into the parking lot, I couldn't believe it. When he came back in, and she kicked his ass, I was in total shock. She looked like someone out of a spy movie. You know; the mild mannered librarian who's actually an undercover agent and single-handedly takes out a gang of bad guys who came in to steal the secret manuscript hidden behind the index cards. Lizzy had to guide me to the car, and we were probably a mile away before my mind finally unclenched, and I could think again. Then it was like I was having a panic attack. If that is what post-traumatic stress is like, then I have a whole new respect for our military.

I couldn't believe how quickly Lizzy fell asleep when we got to the hotel; I couldn't have slept if you'd hit me with a bat. I had gone to take a quick shower — more to give me time to compose myself than anything else. I had only been gone a few minutes, but when I came back out in my Pjs, there was Lizzy, sacked out on one of the beds. Amber was sitting on the edge of the bed, and I wasn't sure if she was waiting for me or protecting Lizzy. The thought that it might be the latter made me nervous walking up. Damn it, I didn't want to be afraid of her; she had been protecting me for goodness sake.

I sat on the edge of the other bed and wondered what to do. Suddenly we were both speaking at once.

"Amber, I..." "Christine, I..."

We both blushed and giggled. "You go ahead," I said.

"Christine, I don't want you to be afraid of me. Are you?"

I took a deep breath and let it out in a long sigh. "A little," I said tentatively, and then rushed on, "I'm sorry, Amber, I don't want to be, but ... geez, you totally owned a guy over twice your size. It was the most amazing thing I've ever seen — and the scariest — and even though I know you were doing it to protect me, it still scares me that you can do it. I never would have guessed you for the martial arts type."

"I didn't used to be," she said. "I started studying a while ago. Christine, I'm not who you think I am."

She paused for a moment, probably to let me try and digest that statement, and then suddenly she slid off the bed, knelt on the floor in front of me, and said, "My name is not Amber Olsen, that is just the name they gave me to hide me from the man who tried to kill me. My real name is Angela Osborne, and I owe my life to David Malcolm."

She went on to tell me the story of how she became Amber Olsen, how she had been kidnapped by a sadistic madman. It didn't take much for the pieces to start falling into place, and suddenly I knew who she was. You see stories about people like her — mostly in movies — living in hiding, but you never expect to actually meet one.

She went on to tell me about how she was tortured, raped, and beaten for almost a month. She showed me the scars on her knee from the surgery to repair the damage he had done, and then she showed me where they'd had to amputate the two toes on her left foot to keep the infection from spreading. What can I say? It was horrible.

And she told me of the man who refused to give up when the FBI couldn't find her, and how he had actually located her captor and given the information to the FBI. Only they arrived too late, and the killer was gone. She said killer because they had already figured out that he had done this three times before, killing the girls after he was done with them. Anyway, the killer had already fled — he knew the FBI was after him — only he had left the house wired to blow up minutes after they arrived to rescue her. Somehow, David had gotten both her and Rebecca — the FBI agent who had gone in after her — and the killer's computer out before the bomb went off. From the information they were able to retrieve, they were able to positively identify him as the man who had tortured and killed the first three girls. David got the rewards for identifying the killer, but it turned out that her kidnapper was also a professional assassin that the European authorities had been after for years. They thought he had died in the explosion when the place he was trapped blew up, but apparently that's his favorite way of escaping. So, Angela was sent into hiding, so that he couldn't come back and try to finish the job.

David kept in touch with her through her time in rehab, and when he noticed that she seemed to be getting more and more depressed rather than improving, he sought outside help to try and find the cause. It took a while, but eventually they figured it out. Without a degree in psychology it would be difficult to understand it, and I'm not qualified to try and explain it, but it boils down to Angela —, Amber now — was ... never mind. I can't explain it, but the only solution was for David to become Amber's master. Okay, that's just going to confuse everyone. It turned out that Amber was a closet Submissive, only she didn't know it, and the thoughts she was having every time she got near David were driving her crazy. The real problem was that she wasn't capable of understanding the problem, let alone the solution. The solution being that Amber needed someone to teach her what she was. Now, if you do a little research, you'll quickly discover that the single most important component to this type of relationship is trust. Amber would only accept instruction from someone she trusted, and the only person on Earth she trusted was — you guessed it — David. Now, most people who stumble across this type of relationship run screaming over the nearest horizon. David didn't. Even more important was that he wasn't overjoyed with the idea of having a beautiful girl — and Amber is beautiful, with a body to die for — so deeply dependent on him that she would do literally anything to please him. Yeah, we're talking sex slave here. Most guys would have been stoked at the idea, not David; he wanted nothing to do with it, but when it was made clear by the very people he had brought in that if he didn't do it, she would continue to slowly slip away and probably either kill herself or end up in a rubber room...

David stepped up. He learned what she needed to know, showed her the truth, and got her started on the only path she had that led anywhere near a normal, sane life. When she was ready to leave the rehab center, he arranged for her to be sent to the same school his fiancée was attending, and Lizzy took over as her Mistress, caring for her and seeing to her continued growth and education. One of the things that David had insisted on from the very beginning was that Amber be able to defend herself. Otherwise she would never feel safe without him nearby. She had started as soon after surgery as she could stand, and since she had nothing better to do, it was almost all she did twelve to fourteen hours a day. Stretching, meditation, and working out became her life. I've never seen anyone sit so still in my life, she could be a manikin. Her physical therapy team was amazed by how fast she got her balance and movement back after all the surgery.

Being in hiding with the FBI afforded her a good selection of both instructors and sparring partners — all of whom were very sympathetic to why she wanted to do it — and she got really good, really fast. Real martial arts isn't the stuff you see in the movies. Bruce Lee and Jackie Chan are good, but they make their money by choreographing the scenes so that no one gets hurt, and so that — when properly edited — they look real. Amber trained with real agents in real-world scenarios. That's how she learned to use the condiment tray and the fork. I guess it's true what they say: In the right hands, anything is a weapon.

She said that when the trucker started getting physical, her one thought was to protect me, but that now she wondered if she had done the right thing because now I was afraid of her.

"I'm not afraid of you, Amber," I said. "I'm afraid of what you can do, and I don't understand why you felt it so important to protect me; you hardly know me."

"I know," she said, "but you are important to my Master. Christine, David doesn't have casual friends. It seems like everyone that comes into his life is there for a reason. I know what he's already done for you; I know he considers you a friend; and I know that if he had been there, he would have acted as I did to protect you. But he wasn't here, so I ... kind of did it for him."

"Well, thank you, Amber, and I do appreciate you stepping in to protect me. I was really getting scared there towards the end. They train us to handle unruly passengers at FA School, but it's not the same when you don't have the threat of federal prosecution to hold over them. When my training didn't work ... I'm glad you were there. One thing though?"

"What's that?" Amber asked.

"Did you see the look on his face when you said I was on my period?"

That broke the mood, and we spent a few minutes laughing about men in general and tough guys in particular. I'm not sure when it all ended, but when I woke up the next morning, I found myself wrapped in her embrace. I knew she and Lizzy were intimate, but this didn't feel like that. I think she was still protecting me. Not that it would have bothered me, but I'd never been with another girl that way before. I had been close...

One of my life long regrets revolved around a girl in my high school that everyone said was a lesbian. She was cute, and very sweet — though she did tend to dress in a more masculine style; I don't know if I ever saw her in a dress the whole time we were in school. I always wondered what it would be like to make out with her, but I never got up the nerve to pursue it. The only other time I got close was at a party with Brian when I'd had way too much to drink, and he wanted me to kiss this other girl that was there. I almost did it, but she was kind of skanky and cheap, and that's just not me no matter how drunk I am.

I was surprised to see Lizzy awake and watching us as we lay there together. Eventually she got up and came to retrieve Amber, kissing her cheek and telling her it was time to get up and hit the road. Apparently the decision had been made somewhere along the line to drop any remaining pretense because the two of them went off to the shower together. I resisted the urge to follow them, but it was tempting. I spent the time making coffee and getting our stuff together and ready to go. The room coffee turned out to be truly awful, but fortunately there was a Starbucks right next to the on-ramp. That got us a hundred miles further down the road before we stopped and had breakfast. We only have about five hundred miles to go, so if all goes well, we should make Vegas by late afternoon.

Jimmy

Rod called early to tell me that he had talked to his contact in Witness Protection, and identities were being established for my parents and Allison. I knew it was all off the books, and I offered to pay for them, but he turned me down, saying that if they had done their job right, it wouldn't be necessary.

Part of me was sad to think of them leaving, but the thought that they would finally be safe far outweighed any feelings of sadness I may have had about them being so far away. Since it was Sunday, there was not a lot that could be done, but he thought everything would be in place by mid-week.

Meanwhile, Jamie and I were preparing for our second trip to hell's doorstep; known locally as the Church of the Inner Circle. After our time working with Christine, we had jumped right in and started crafting a public persona for David Malcolm. We had taken a lot more time with this one since it was going to have to stand up to some serious scrutiny in the future, especially if, or rather when Hightower tried to mess with it. I called Lizzy, and she told me they were on the road, headed my way, but that they had stopped for breakfast. With luck they would be in sometime in the early afternoon. Then she went to the ladies room, locked herself in a stall, and slipped into dreamspace, so we could have a private chat.

"Should I book airfare or a chapel?" I asked.

"I love you so much," she said, hugging me tightly. Finally she gave a big sigh and said, "Airfare, but I want you to book mine for tonight and Amber's for sometime Monday, okay?"

"Do you think that's wise?"

"Christine knows the truth, or at least enough of it. I want her to understand Amber's position; that it's up to her if she wants to involve her, or make her watch, ignore her, whatever, and it won't matter to Amber. Oh, and don't forget, you're going to need to pick up condoms. If you make Christine wait while you run to the store at the last minute, it could get ugly."

"Lizzy! You make it sound like she's going to jump me in the driveway. Give her a little more credit, okay?"

"I know, I know. I'm just reminding you that you need to make sure everything goes smoothly there; she's still a little ... I don't know ... undecided, about some stuff, and I'm guessing this is the source of the conflict I'm seeing. Give her a reason to stay, okay? Obviously there is more to her being here, and besides, then I won't have to worry about you while I'm away."

"You worry about me?"

"Jimmy, you've gone from Allison and Shannon at your beck and call twenty-four-seven to only getting it in dreams on a very irregular basis. You're a dream come true to any woman, and I wasn't kidding when I told Christine you were a hot target. Trust me, Jimmy; you're a sheep lost in the wrong part of the wild animal park. I think you'll be a lot safer if you have someone to watch out for you — not to mention having someone for you to watch out for. That white knight inside you needs someone to protect, and you can't afford any more problems drifting into your life. I think you've got enough there to keep you busy already."

"True, and speaking of that, Jamie and I are going back into the lion's den this morning. We've constructed a persona that is one hundred percent David Malcolm. We're going to hang back in the background and see what Hightower tries to do with it. Then we'll just close up its bubble and save it until the next time we have to deal with him."

"Be careful, Jimmy," she said. "You don't know how dangerous he may really be."

"Are you kidding?" I asked. "After all the shit he's done, trust me, we're very aware of how dangerous he is. Why else do you think we went to the trouble to create a disposable personality just for him?"

"Okay, I'm just saying..."

"I know sweetie, and we'll be careful, I promise. Listen, I have to finish getting ready, so I'll see you when you get here, okay? And don't forget you need to decide where we're eating."

"Well, I did have one place in mind... ," she teased.

"Behave yourself, you naughty girl. I'll see you in a few hours."

The waiting thing was starting to get really difficult.

The good news was that this time I was taking my own car to church. The bad news was that it meant that this time I couldn't just run if something went wrong — not and have any chance of getting this close again. This time I had to stay and see it all the way through — nervous didn't begin to cover how I felt. Fortunately my new persona didn't know anything about why we were really there. As far as he was concerned I was just going back because I had been forced to leave early last time and wanted to give the place a fair shake before writing it off as my primary church. The new David was just as sure and cocky as you would expect a wealthy young entrepreneur to be — especially one who found things others — even the FBI — couldn't. Personally I thought he was more than a little too cocky, but I was willing to wait and see how he handled himself in public before passing final judgment.

As before, their greeter-slash-security person met me as I entered the lobby.

"Welcome to the Church of the Inner Circle, is this your first time visiting?"

"No," I answered, shaking his hand. "I was here a few weeks ago, but I had to leave early. There was a young girl; April, that showed me around. I was wondering if she was working today? I promised her I would be back, and I wanted to say hello."

"Certainly, sir," he said. He turned to a group of girls waiting not far away and called, "Carrie Ann!"

Instantly a young girl started moving towards him. She couldn't have been much more than ten or eleven, and looking out through David's eyes I tried to see if I recognized her. "This gentleman is looking for April; would you find her and let her know she has a guest please?"

"Yes, sir, right away," she said. Then she spun and vanished into the crowd.

"It will be just a moment, sir," he said and returned to greeting people as they came in.

The girl returned a few minutes later, and my host looked disappointed that she was alone. "Carrie Ann, I thought you were fetching April?"

She dropped another curtsy and, eyes averted, said, "Yes sir. I was told that April is servicing the Deacons at morning prayer. I was instructed to wait with the gentleman until she is available."

David was oblivious, but Jamie and I could both see the fear in her eyes.

"Ah, I see. Very well — Carrie Ann, please escort Mr... ?" he left the blank for me to fill in.

"Malcolm," I said.

"Please escort Mr. Malcolm inside and sit where April will be able to find you without disrupting the service."

"That's all right," I said. "It's no big deal; I just wanted to say hello, so she would know that I had come back. I'll just sit where I was before, so she can find me. I understand she has other duties to the church, and if she can't make it, then maybe I'll see her after."

"Oh, it's no trouble at all, Mr. Malcolm," Carrie Ann said. "I would be happy to wait with you. That way if you need anything, I'll be able to show you where to go. Please, sir, it would be my pleasure."

"Okay," I said. "As long as it's no trouble."

And with that the young girl escorted me inside. I showed her where April and I had been seated before, and she sat with me while we waited for the service to begin. April arrived as the second song was beginning, and Carrie Ann moved down one seat to make room for her to sit next to me.