My Navel Gazette
Copyright© 2009 by pj
Chapter 2
Essay: First Love Nostalgia - Sweet and Sour
It isn't easy reconnecting with your first love after decades. Not if you love women generally, and appreciate her for contributing to your attitudes on women and sexuality, specifically.
Contrary to most stories you read on here, it's a matter of respect that you don't do anything to tarnish her memories of you when you were together.
Because you remember it differently. Oh ... you may have written several delicious accounts of how it all went down when you were bumping bones. And you probably included how she made you feel during and afterward. You believe that because you appreciated her girlish adoration and loved long afterglow petting, that might be enough of your feminine side sensitivities to put your attitudes equal. Not quite. She probably didn't see and feel the sensual aspects exactly the same way you did. That's why you're from Mars, she's from Venus.
And of course, you didnt include the misunderstandings and mistakes that broke you up. You've thought of that over the years, and rationalized it to death. Why pick scabs.
Meantime you've made a life and family and so has she. You've established family bonds and respect for your commitment to your mate. Even if things dont turn out exactly as you might have wished, and you've not been exactly the ideal husband, you understand what made you that way and you know it's partly that the same things you appreciated from all the women in your life contributed to your peccadillos.
In the same manner ... she has moved on. She may have raised a family on her own, owing to having dumped some guy who didnt live up to 'loves women', or just loved 'em the wrong way.