Chapter 20

"Come, join the Holy Crusade of Thia and Her consort! We march to the wilderness to end the Original's Menace to Her Bounty!" cried the fevered zelot.

"No, come and join the Minions of Phantos and His paramor! We salle to battle against the godless Originals!" cried the equally fevered zelot of the other camp. The entire town of Twomby was gathered, in two equally large groups, each prepairing to go forth in the direction their respective god or goddess seemed to be sort of pointing as they held hands and blessed the bounty from atop the fountain which had miraculously appeared overnight along with a strange tree that was wrapped in stone robes. Noone could understand what the tree thing was about, so they just ignored it, except for appreciating the shade it provided the market square. Soon the two factions were several miles from the city, with no rations, shelters, or weapons, as the prepairing they had done had not been of the practical sort. Small bewildered children cried because their parents had gone mad. Well, perhaps you would have too, at some powerful yet ambiguous sign from your favored diety?

The meddling kids were chagrined. Being young, they hadn't appreciated the full effect of Unintended Consequences. Now they had to stop the madness. Great Idea, Steetch! But, let's not point the finger of blame, or respond with the finger of defiance. Let's just work on cleaning the whole damned mess up. It was given to Hardcase, aka Godess Thia, to stop the crazies calling themselves the Holy Crusade, and to Steetch and Freaky, to re-educate the misguided Minions. They were Team Phantos. Freaky lobbyed for and won the role of Phantos, this time- although to be fair, Steetch on the fountain only looked like Steetch if you climbed up right behind Thia and looked over her shoulder at him. Otherwise, he presented a different mien from every vantage. Still, since Freaky would be doing the special effects, let him be the god. Hardcase was soon dressed in her greenest vinery, and blown off (very scary, traveling by wind!) to chastize her flock, and the Phantos team went off on their own troubleshooting mission. Axorie chose to sit this one out. She hadn't tried to discourage the midnight redecoration of the town of Twomby, so she wasn't totaly blameless, but was it her role to naysay? The fact that she hadn't participated in the first place, should have been message enough, wouldn't you think? In anycase, whatever her reasons or justifications, she chose to not get involved.

Hardcase might have lost her ruby slippers (Freaky had upgraded her stone sabots) if the planters in their tops hadn't rooted them to her enveloping vines. Talk about planting a shoe where it can do some good! awrr, bad pun, sorry. She approached the huddled masses from the dark, All the campfires flamed up in a roar, lighting the dispirited and hungry worshipers. The goddess Thia waved her hands and clouds of dust billowed out, settling on the ground along with seeds, and a sudden crop of produce grew, thick and rich. (Some say that even now any hungry traveler may find sufficient provender to sup upon) "Come, My Children, and eat." spake Thia. Noone moved. The goddess pointed her finger, and those indicated flinched, but obeyed. "You, you you and you, come gather and distribute my bounty to my hungry children!" the irritated goddess demanded. "What are you doing out there in my wilderness, unprepaired, undefended, and unsheltered?" She asked. Noone answered, although a few glared at the Original zelot. She thought she recognised him as the one whos arrow she had incinerated. Hardcase sighed. The Crusaders cowered. Hardcase rolled her eyes. Her Children groveled. Although everyone held some form of raw produce in their hands, noone ate. This was going to be even more difficult than she had thought.

This would be a piece of cake, thought Freaky. A little razzle dazzle, and they would be eating out of his hands. Steetch was taking a more pragmatic 'wait and see' attitude. He knew that dealing with frenzied zelots could be problematic, it wasn't something that logic could always overcome. A brief consultation, and a sketchy plan- Freaky would go in, mingle, and try to take over the group, get them to return to Twomby. Steetch would wait in the wings, or actualy, above the encampment on a obligingly solid piece of air. If need be, to give more creedence to the Phantos's identity, a presto chango could be done, switching the two, in which case Freaky would continue to provide special effects, while Steetch could dazzle with kung fu moves. It was a direct, simple plan, typical male thinking.