Chapter 23: The Shaving Isn't Over Yet

The next two wrestlers drawn were Barb Miller and Ashley Law. They were both Delts, so I knew we'd have two girls in the semi-finals, because the four remaining girls were Sigs.

Barb and Ashley were not what one would call friends. Their history went back to the beginning of their freshmen year. The story I'd heard was at a fraternity party, one of them had gone upstairs with the other's date, the aggrieved party followed, and there was some hair pulling and a blouse ripped off. Both girls denied the event ever happened in any way, shape or form. Nevertheless, they were not close. Their practice matches against each other were the roughest of all.

When the match began, they immediately went for each other's bras. They pulled, hard. Barb's bra was gone, and Ashley fell backwards into the mud. Barb was still standing, and she was holding Ashley's bra. They were topless, in nine seconds.

They were breathing fire, as they paced in the mud, waiting for the minute between rounds to end. Barb's bottoms had ties at the hip. Ashley tried to get behind Barb and pull at her ties. Barb kept turning, to face Ashley, but she was always a quarter turn short. Barb managed to grab the front of Ashley's suit and she tugged, but Ashley's suit was a pull up, and it didn't give. Ashley got hold of one of Barb's ties, which came open easily. Ashley grabbed the back of the suit, and yanked, leaving Barb naked. That took twenty-one seconds.

In thirty seconds, Barb was naked. Barb must have stretched out Ashley's elastic, because as she walked over to her corner, Ashley's bottoms began to slip, exposing her crack in the back, and most of her pubes in front. She grabbed them and held them up, but when she got to her corner, she kicked them off. The referee reminded her that just like in her first match, discarding the damaged garment meant the girls were tied. They would begin the third round standing up. From the look on her face, Ashley had forgotten the rule. She could have begun the round in the top position, even with the bottoms only around one leg, and her loose bottoms probably would have made no difference.

Jim's took the microphone and pointed out that this match had only lasted thirty seconds so far, and they should all hope for a quick end to it, and more time with the razor, as they were a minute and sex seconds away from the Green line. He really did say sex seconds, rather than six seconds. He got a good laugh. Somehow, I didn't think Rox Green thought the Green line was any funnier this time than before.

The girls charged each other when the match began. This time, they grabbed each other's shoulders, the first thing which looked even remotely like a wrestling move. As soon as they hooked up, Ashley tried to knee Barb in the groin; she got a hip. In return, Barb got Ashley dead center between the legs. Ashley had an open mouth, wide-eyed, blank look on her face after Barb's knee made contact. Barb shoved her, and Ashley was flat in the mud, face up. Barb spread Ashley's legs as far apart as she could, and held her legs apart by putting her knees as far up on the inside of Ashley's legs as possible. Then Barb grabbed a handful of Ashley's pubic hair, and yanked as hard as she could. Ashley surrendered; almost instantly. The third round took twenty-four seconds. The whole match took fifty-four seconds.