Chapter 5

Clare sat in her room, resting her head in the palm of one hand, while tapping a pen on the desk in front of her with the other. She was busy scribbling out names on a piece of paper, trying to figure out the best name to come up with, for her new "adult star" life. She knew that it couldn't be plain, nor did she really want to use her real name, but Clare was having problems trying to come up with something that wasn't as corny or cheesy as "Busty Betty" or something to that effect. Sighing, Clare opened up her laptop, and just for the hell of it, searched up a porn star name generator. Putting in her first name only, her result came up as "Chandelier LaBouche", which made her giggle a bit. Another one came up as "Natasha Naughty", which made Clare laugh a little more. Barbie Jammer, Shannon Pierce, Summer Lexi, Nikki Pleasures, Lolita Lovedoll, all names that made Clare roll laughing in her chair. She couldn't help but to shake her head, knowing that she would eventually have to choose some name for herself.

The name Lolita Lovedoll kinda stuck out at her, and Clare decided that she would choose that for her screen name. "That's kind of cute." She told herself, and wrote it down so she wouldn't forget. She found that she was actually happy about the decision that she made. Not just about the name, but about actually being on camera. It was then that she thought about something. She looked out the window, at the main house that sat on the side of the garage where she slept. She wondered for a second, if her father, or anyone else for that matter, would actually see her in porn, and what her father would think started to bother her. She stopped herself, and reminded herself that it didn't seem like her father cared what she did, so Clare had no problem with her decision. At least, she hoped. Closing her laptop, Clare sighed softly, and figured there was no turning back now.

Making her way into town, Clare stopped in a small coffee shop just so she could find someplace to relax, and possibly gather her thoughts. As she sat by a window, Clare watched the different people that passed by. She thought about what they all do in their everyday lives, and wondered just how many of them would ever think about becoming a porn star. Was she jumping into something that she had no clue about? Probably. But was it really the right decision for her to make? At least that's what Clare asked herself as she sat there, thinking. "Penny for your thoughts?" Clare heard and turned around. She stared at the young, blonde boy that was cleaning a table next to her. "Sorry. It just seemed like something was on your mind." He said, and stood up straight. "You haven't forgotten who I am have you? I mean, it wasn't that long ago that we graduated high school." He said, and Clare stared at him a little more.

Clare looked over at the young man's name tag. "Kenny." Clare simply said. "I'm sorry. It's one of those days." She said. She remembered who he was, a quiet boy that was in her class. She never talked to him much, only when they would do some sort of assignment together. She felt embarrassed that she didn't realize who he was at first. "It's cool. I wasn't expecting you to really remember me at all to tell you the truth." Kenny replied. "So, you seem kind of pre-occupied. Something must be bothering you." He said, and Clare shrugged. "You could say that." She said. "I've got this chance to get out of this town, and make a name out of myself. But, I'm wondering if I should actually do it or not." She said.

"Well, you first want to ask yourself, am I doing this for the right reason?" Kenny said. "If you believe that you're doing this to better yourself, and not for the excuse that you just want to get away from this town, then your decision should be easier." He told her, and Clare nodded. It made perfect sense, but yet, it didn't make any sense at all. At least at the moment it didn't. "Not like you're going to be a porn star or anything right?" Kenny said, and Clare started to turn red. "Right! Um, it was nice seeing you again. I have to get to work now." She said, and rushed out the door. That was a little too close to home. Even for Claire.