Chapter 1: Saturday 22 September 2007

Kaneohe Bay Hawaii — Hospital — Saturday, Day Twenty-Three

"Crazy; I'm crazy for feelin' so lonely,
I'm crazy, crazy for feelin' so blue..."

"Ben?"

I opened my eyes to see my beloved Jens watching me, her brow wrinkled. One arm was wrapped tightly around me, and she was stroking my brow. "It's about time you woke up. I've been so worried about you. What's all this 'Crazy' shit?" Jens said.

"Jens!" I lifted my head and smiled. "Heaven; I'm in heaven," I sang.

"Jens, you wouldn't believe it. I dreamed the strangest dream ... like an Indian vision or something. I'm afraid, my love," I said seriously, "That I might be going crazy."

I laid my head on the pillow again and sang, "Crazy; I'm crazy for feeling so lonely..." I turned my head to look at Jens again and let out a silly giggle. She looked like a raccoon — a raccoon with a really white face and really black eyes.

"My poor Ben. Are you okay?" Jens asked, her voice laden with concern.

"I've never felt better. Meya malinkaya enot¹. You're so cute with those eyes." I said and started laughing again.

Jens hugged me tighter. "What's wrong with you? You're so silly."

"Nothing. I feel great. I feel fantastic." I tried to get up and Jens held me down.

"Did you forget that you were shot?" She scolded.

"Oh yeah. I guess I was. I'm fine now. I don't feel any pain." I kept trying to get up.

"Ben! Stop trying to get up!" Jens ordered. "You passed out from blood loss. I carried you to the entrance, and they brought you to the hospital. They couldn't stitch your wound so they had to cauterize part of it.

"Then they wanted to give you a transfusion, and we have the same blood type, so I wouldn't let them give you anyone else's blood but mine. I wanted to make sure that you wouldn't catch any weird diseases.

"So now we're closer than ever because you'll always have a part of me inside of you." She kissed me and hugged me again.

"I would rather have a part of me inside you," I said with a silly laugh, and tried to get up again.

Jens held me down. "You're not going anywhere, Mister. You need to stay in this bed."

"Well, if I don't go to the bathroom soon, I'm gonna go pee right here." I struggled against her.

"Let me help you," Jens said, reaching for the urinal.

"Oh, no you don't! You just want to take advantage of me in my current condition," I answered, fighting with her over the urinal and making a hell of a lot of noise.

The noise attracted the nurse, affectionately known as "Nurse Battle Axe."

"Young lady! What are you doing out of your bed?" the nurse barked.

"He was trying to get up, and I was making sure he didn't," Jens sheepishly replied, and scooted back to her bed.

"Hey! Nurse Battle Axe. I need to pee right now," I demanded.

The nurse held the urinal for me and waited ... and waited ... and waited. Finally, I was done and felt much better.

Once I was done with my immediate bodily needs, I noticed that the fucking cast was back on my arm, and my other arm had a bunch of tubes coming out of it.

"What the shit is this cast doing back on my arm? I thought I got rid of this piece of crap," I exclaimed, and started beating it on the side rail of the hospital bed.

Nurse Battle Axe jumped on me, trying to get me to stop. She wasn't doing very well, so next thing I knew, Jens was on top of me trying to help her.

I felt like I was being attacked and fought back, pushing the women off me, banging the hell out of the cast, and making a tremendous amount of racket. They kept trying, grabbing at my arms to stop me, but they weren't having much success.

Naturally, all the noise attracted attention. General Donaldson and a doctor walked in to the room.

I ordered, "Ten-hut! General in the room," and tried to stand up, but Jens and the nurse held me down. Forgetting about the cast, I did swing my right hand up for a salute and whacked myself in the head. Damn. That hurt, and my back had started hurting, too.

"What the hell is going on in here? It sounds like a fucking war," the general bellowed.

The nurse explained to the general that Jens and I were the worst patients she had ever taken care of and filled him in on all the details.

"Doctor Linus, Check him out," the general ordered.

The doctor came over, made me lean forward, and looked at my back.

Jens slinked back to her bed.

"Shit. He broke open his wound, and he's bleeding again," Doctor Linus said.

"Hey," I complained. "I don't know what you're doing back there, Doctor Penis. But it hurts like hell."

"That's Doctor Linus, jarhead. Hold still while I work on you. Nurse, come here and assist me."

He was fucking with my back, and I didn't like it. I fought him and the nurse.

The general ordered, "Sergeant Major Bennie Blaine! Quit acting like an ass and let the doctor work on you. If you keep fighting, we will have you tied to the bed."

That got my attention. I hate being tied down.

"Nurse. Go get some morphine and sedate this ... patient," Doctor Linus spat.

I started feeling much better when she came back and injected the morphine into my IV, and stopped fighting the doctor. I turned my head and saw Jens with her raccoon eyes and started laughing again. Damn, she looked funny.

When the doctor was done, he had me lay back on the bed. He went over and talked with the general. I couldn't hear what they said, but the way I was feeling, it didn't matter.

Then they went over and talked to my lovely Jens. I felt so lucky to have such a beautiful fiancée.

The nurse made sure that the rails were up on my bed and that I was all tucked in. As soon as they left the room Jens came over and jumped into bed with me.

Mmmm, it was so nice and warm and comfortable there with Jens's head on my chest, and I was so ... tired ... and sleepy. If I could just get that damned song out of my head, I could rest.

Khudabah, Pakistan — Morning of Escape Day One

Damn, it's late. I've been up for hours and done my bedridden exercises twice. Where the hell are the other guards and Zarika? They've never been this late.

I finally hear them coming, and the other guard is waking up. It's about time.

Something's different today; it's only Zarika and one other guard. I try to meet eyes with Zarika, but she won't look at me. My gut clenches.

Shit. What the hell is going on?

At least the routine is the same. March me to my cell and tie me to the chair. Hurry up, motherfuckers. I want to talk to Zarika and find out what's happening.

Finally. They've backed off. Now I can talk to her. "Zarika, what's going on?"

"Shhh, Ben. Don't talk right now. Let me dress your rat bites," Zarika answers.

The changes have me agitated today, and it's hard for me to sit still.

"Sit still, Ben. Don't attract the guard's attention." Zarika scolds me.

I've heard that tone of voice before. Damn. It reminds me so much of Jens, I can't help but comply.

As she dresses my left leg, I notice something feels different, so I glance down casually, careful not to attract the guard's attention. I'll be damned — it's my Ka-Bar. She's wrapping the bottom edge of the dressing around the blade of the knife, leaving the handle and hilt exposed.

I get so excited, I start fidgeting again, but I simmer down when she pinches the hell out of my leg.

She gets my leg re-dressed and new pants on me. Shit, there's even a cut in pant leg so I can get to the Ka-Bar. That clever little girl has thought of everything.

Finally she's done and half-whispers, "Hussein and everyone else are gone on a mission today. They've left only the two guards.The Imam will be here soon. When he sends me for tea, watch, and you will know what to do."

I am so impatient that I can barely eat breakfast. "Ben, calm down, or the guard will figure out something's going on," Zarika admonishes.

It works, and I'm able to feign boredom despite the fact that inside, I am boiling. I can taste the blood in the back of my throat; the warrior I've had to repress for so long is fighting to come out.

Waiting is torture of a new kind, but finally the Imam comes, and we start our chess game. Zarika is at her usual position by my feet. I let the Imam win the first game of chess.

"Ben, you seem distracted today. Is something wrong?" the Imam questions.

It's time for my best bullshitting. "My stomach is upset," I groan. "It has been all morning long."

"Perhaps some tea would help to calm it. Zarika, go fetch us some tea," the Imam orders.

She stands up, looks at me, and winks.

The Imam sets up the chess board for a new game.

He notices me watching Zarika as she leaves the room. "Ah, my son, I see you watching Zarika. I understand. You miss the comfort of a woman. I will ask Hussein to find you a nice young girl."

I almost puke when he dares to call me, "son".

As Zarika had walked out of the room, she'd looked at the guard, smiled, and beckoned with her finger. And like a dog following a bitch in heat, he'd left the room.

It's the Imam's turn, and he's taking his time, flapping his gums about how I need a woman. Damn him, I have all the woman I need. Her name is Jens, and I am going to see her again.