Chapter 18

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

The apartment was empty. Jake called Jan’s house and told his mother that his plan had fallen apart and that he was back home. He took off his suit coat and tie and sat down in the living room with his book bag. He had already finished the paper for Jan’s class. He had two final exams the next day. It would not hurt to put in some extra time studying.

Jake remembered that he had not told Finch to sign the affidavit at the lawyer’s office, so he called him.

“This is Jake Fielding, Mr. Finch.”

“What do you want, Fielding?”

“You’ll need to go to the law office of Andy Cramer tomorrow afternoon to sign the affidavit relinquishing custody of Carol.”

Finch did not respond. Jake heard voices in the background.

“Mr. Finch, are you there?”

“Yes. I think you should come over here to talk about it with me.”

“Negotiations have ended. If you don’t sign that affidavit tomorrow, I’ll make you regret it. Maybe I’ll go talk to the police. Maybe I’ll just take another big chunk out of your bank account. And that reminds me. Be sure to take with you a check for $100,000 for Carol’s education fund. Once you’ve done those two things, we won’t need to have any more contact.”

“Please, come and talk. I’m sure that we can make an arrangement that you’ll like even better. I know you like Dawn. Would you like a slave?”

“Mr. Finch, I’m thirteen. It would be hard to explain having a slave. I don’t have a way to get there, and it’s getting too late to walk. I’m not discussing this anymore. If I find out tomorrow that you didn’t meet your obligations then I promise I will make you regret it.”

Jake hung up before Finch could say anything else. He sat down with his books, but he could not concentrate. Finally he put the books away and lay on the sofa, thinking about Julie.

Why had he responded to her like that? Why not just enjoy a night of sex with a very attractive girl? He knew the answer to that. It was not just sex he wanted. He could have that for the asking from Carol or Jan. Or from Dawn Finch or even his mother, for that matter.

He had been spoiled by Jan and the easy way they had come to be so fond of each other. Maybe he had convinced himself that he saw in Julie the same things he saw in Jan, minus the complication of a husband. He didn’t know his own mind. He wished he could read himself like he could read others.

The truth was that he loved Jan more than anyone. Well, except for his mother. Jan was beautiful and sexy and, unlike his mother, available to him. His mother was not his equal like Jan was. Ellen needed to be protected. He was glad to be her protector, but it changed their relationship, made her dependent on him, almost like she was his child as well as his mother.

Jan was smart and accomplished and vibrant. He respected her as much as he loved her. If they were the same age and she were single, he would pursue her to the ends of the earth. Of course, Jan’s fetish for boys affected how she viewed him now and how she would view him later. For now though, Jake thought that sex with her would be the special thing that he had hoped it would be with Julie.

What was he going to do about Julie? They could still be friends, he thought. Maybe more. At least they could be when she got over being mad. They might even be able to become lovers. Maybe friends with benefits is what she really wanted.

However Jake and Julie resolved things, there was the big problem of what to do about Carol. Carol was not just Julie’s problem anymore. Jake worried about her, too. She was the person most likely to be hurt if he and Julie could not patch things up.

He thought that their plan to nurture Carol was sound. It would take a lot of work but they had all summer. It would be better with Julie’s help. Although he could tap into Carol’s nascent affection for him, she had a stronger emotional connection to Julie. It would be a step backward if Jake could not build on it. Plus, Jake did not really know if he could keep up with Carol’s demand for sex, not that it wouldn’t be fun to find out.

Meanwhile, Carol was expecting him to have sex with her tomorrow and he was going to have to put her off. If he was not going to have sex for the first time with Julie because she did not love him, he certainly was not going to have sex with Carol who could not love anyone.

Just then the door burst open. Jake started. Ellen and Jan surged in, giggling as they came. Seeing Jake, they pulled their faces into a semblance of seriousness.

“We didn’t want you to be alone after your disappointment,” Ellen said.

“We thought you might need ... consolation,” Jan said.

They both started giggling again. Jake could not help himself and smiled along with them. Ellen poured a glass of wine for everyone, including Jake.

“Just this one time,” Ellen said as she handed him a glass.

“Spill the beans,” Jan said, sitting down next to Jake. “Let us be your sounding boards. Tell us what happened.”

Jake ran through the events.

“So you turned down hot teen-aged sex because she doesn’t love you,” Jan said.

“That makes me sound like a bonehead, but yeah. I decided I didn’t want her to be my first time.”

“What are you going to do?” Ellen asked.

Jake leaned against Jan.

“I’ve got my eye on someone else. I think it would be special to be with her. Maybe she’d be willing to be my first.”

Jan put her hands around Jake’s arm and pulled it to her breast.

“Ellen, do you mind if I take care of Jake?”

“No, not if I get to watch.”

“I don’t mind that at all. In fact, it would add a little spice,” Jan said. “At least if it’s alright with Jake.”

Jake smiled and nodded.

She pulled his shirttail out of his pants and unbuttoned his shirt.

“The thing about boys, Ellen, is that they are so smooth and lean. Men are hairy and meaty. That’s fine for many women, but I prefer the way Jake feels.” She slid her hands inside his shirt and rubbed them over his chest. “You can feel the muscles under his skin. See the definition in his pecs? His muscles are economical and functional, not gaudy. You can see his bones. Look at how distinct his collarbones are. His skin is soft but you can feel hardness underneath. I could spend an hour just running my hands over Jake’s chest.”

Jake delighted in the attention and the feel of Jan’s hands as she caressed him. Ellen was fascinated. She had never thought about all the details of a man’s form. Jake noticed that she wanted to stroke him, too, but held back because he was her son.

“I love the feel of his ribs under my palms,” Jan said. “You can almost see how this slender chest will develop into the powerful torso of a full-grown man. But, for now, it appears almost delicate. See how his rib cage flexes when I press on it.”

She stood Jake up, turned him around, and slipped off his shirt.

“Follow the ribs up to his underarms. He has just a little bit of hair. Look at the silhouette when he lifts his arms. The narrow shoulders and slender waist. The lanky arms with their biceps still waiting to get big. See the movement of the latissimus dorsi muscles as his back flexes?

She turned him around again so that he faced Ellen. She stepped behind him and opened the waist of his trousers.

“Their bellies are so flat. You can see the points of their hips and the line down the center where their stomach muscles knit together. I like the way it’s punctuated by his navel.”

She turned him to the side and pulled his trousers and boxers down to his knees.

“Look at his haunch. So smooth. The long muscles running over his butt and hips and down his thighs. Just a little bit of pubic hair. It’s soft and doesn’t conceal anything. His penis. Not yet a man’s penis. It’s still small but it’s perfect in its shape, and it can outperform any grown man’s. His scrotum, it’s still hairless. You can feel his testicles inside. Small, perfect ovals. Tender to the touch. Already virile. Already able to sow a child in a woman.”

She returned to his penis, stroking it as she continued her narration.

“You didn’t have him circumcised. See the shape of his glans when I pull back the foreskin? It’s like a helmet, ready to penetrate. I love to rub the frenulum right here under the glans. Partly because it’s so sensitive. But I love the fleshy feel of that little bundle of skin.

“A boy tastes so clean when I put his cock in my mouth. I rub my tongue against the frenulum and then around the head. I suck gently and stroke the base of the penis. Like this.”

She took his penis in her mouth. Jake thrust up with his hips involuntarily.

“Oh, Jan. That’s nice.”

Already aroused by Jan’s hand and by the sexually charged scene, Jake raced to his climax. In less than a minute he came. Jan let the semen collect in her mouth. Then she went to Ellen and kissed her, sharing the semen.

“Ellen, I would say that that’s the only thing about Jake that is bland, wouldn’t you.”

Ellen just moaned.

Jan put her hand underneath the skirt of Ellen’s business suit and started to rub her vulva. Ellen was on as short a fuse as Jake and came quickly. Ellen fell onto the sofa and smiled up at them limply.

“One nice thing about being with boys is that you can teach them how to be good lovers. For instance, it is only polite for a man to warn a woman when he is about to shoot off in her mouth.”

“I stand enlightened,” Jake said.

“The other nice thing about boys is that although they come fast, they can go again almost immediately.”

Jan took Jake’s penis into her mouth again. He was hard within a minute.

“A man should be on top his first time,” Jan said. She stood and walked to Ellen’s bedroom, taking off her clothes as she went.

Jake took Ellen’s hand and pulled her up.

“She’s quite a woman,” Jake said quietly. “Let’s go see what else she has in store.” Jake led Ellen back to the bedroom. “I’m glad you’re here to share it with us, Mom.”

He put his arms around his mother, pulled her to him, and kissed her hard. Ellen kissed him back, her arousal high again, even though it had only been a minute since her orgasm.

Jake found Jan lying in the bed with a sheet pulled over her. He walked to the side of the bed and looked down at her, smiling. Her nipples indented the sheet.

Jake looked over at Ellen.

“The thing about women, Mom, is that they seem so soft, but it’s a trick.” He pulled the sheet down to reveal Jan’s breasts. He slid his hand across the side of her left breast. “See how her beautiful breasts are so soft and pliable, how you can almost form them into any shape you want. But Jan is anything but soft. Inside, in her mind, in her character, she is strong. She is hard as diamond. She reasons like a chess champion. She has an indomitable will. She is generous beyond measure with her time and her affection.” Jake thought back to an image of his mother’s and laughed. “She could be a humpback disfigured by leprosy and I would still want desperately to make love to her right now.”

Jan laughed and looked at him fondly.

“Such a silver tongue. But next time, think twice before you sweet-talk me by saying I’m deformed and dropping body parts.”

Jake was surprised when he felt jealousy from Ellen.

Mom, please, don’t be jealous. You are as remarkable as Jan is, though in different ways. And she will never be able to compete with your beauty and your sexiness. But right now she is my lover. Let me do my best to make her feel good. Feel what this does for her.

He relayed Jan’s emotions and sensations to her.

See how she responds when I show her that I appreciate her heart and her mind, not just her body?

Jan’s hopelessly in love with you, isn’t she?

Until I do something worrying. Then she will revert back to the teacher with a will of iron. She loves to be what I need. I don’t know why she is so devoted to me, but it makes me love her desperately.

Jake ran a finger around one of Jan’s nipples.

“See the way her areola puckers and her nipple grows. I love that. Her breasts are firm and shapely.” He cupped them, one in each hand. “They are soft and hefty both. Hefty. It doesn’t sound like a very flattering word, but I love the heft of her breasts. It defies logic, but there is something so appealing, so satisfying about a woman’s breasts. A biologist would say that women evolved breasts to feed babies, but I think they evolved breasts to attract husbands. Or maybe husbands evolved to love breasts. I don’t know. I could do nothing but play with Jan’s breasts for an hour.

“You should see her in class. When she starts to write on the chalkboard, all the boys are riveted. These breasts jiggle and sway. Sometimes we can see her nipples. It drives us all crazy. I feel the lust of the other boys in the class. It’s all I can do to stop myself from groaning out loud. And she knows it, too. She loves the power she has over us.”

Jake kissed her nipple and then sucked it into his mouth for a few seconds before he sat back up. He pulled the sheet further down her abdomen so that her belly button was exposed. He kissed it.

“You can see the muscles of her stomach flexing. The details of those muscles are hidden by that softness, but that’s another trick. I love stroking her soft belly. And I love it when she flexes those muscles, and I feel them underneath. They’re tight and hard. When that happens, we see again that the softness is a deception.”

Jake rolled her on her side, exposing her back. He ran his hand up and down its length, lingering on her shoulders.

“These slender, feminine shoulders conceal her true strength as well. This woman can bear burdens and support others. She’s supported me repeatedly since we’ve come to know each other.”

He rolled her onto her back and pulled the sheet to the side exposing her right hip and leg but keeping her center covered.

“Her legs are long and lean and graceful. You should see how her high heels make her calves flex as she reaches to the top of the blackboard. See the smooth, lean curve of her hip and her bottom. She has the shape of an athlete. I love her ass. A woman’s backside is so luxurious.”

He pulled the sheet down to show her sex.

“I think this sparse, blond pubic hair is very sexy. I wonder if she trims it? There’s no hair on her labia. I don’t think that happens naturally but the effect is nice.” He rubbed his hand up and down her vulva. “She is so soft and smooth. Her inner labia feel like satin.”

Jake licked slowly up her slit, the flat of his tongue lingering on her clitoris. Jan shuddered and grabbed his arms and pulled him down on top of her.

“No more, Jake. I’ve got to have you now. Come to me. I’ll guide you inside me.”

She reached down between them, grabbed his penis, and positioned it at the entrance to her vagina.

Jake pushed in, feeling her hot, moist, clinging vagina enveloping him.

“Go slow, Jake, but come all the way in.”

Jake slid into her until his cock was fully seated. He pushed his groin against her vulva. He felt her experience a delightful tingle as his pubic bone pushed against her clitoris.

“That’s it, Jake. Press firmly into me at the bottom of the stroke. I love that.”

He pulled back and thrust again, pressing against her when he was inside her completely. He experimented with different ways to put pressure on her clitoris. Then he began thrusting in earnest. He began slowly but picked up speed. He pressed against her clit on each stroke. That limited how fast he could go.

Jake’s first orgasm had given him some staying power, but the sensations he was feeling in Jan’s pussy were wonderful. He did not think he would last long.

Jake held himself above Jan, his weight on his arms. He watched her as he thrust and pressed. Each thrust caused Jan’s breasts to roll upward. Jake thought he had never seen anything sexier than that.

Jan began to moan. Jake kept the pace steady.

“Yes, Jake. Just like that. Just a little longer.”

It was only another minute before Jan peaked and cried out in ecstasy. Her vagina clutched at Jake’s penis, sending him to an orgasm as well. Jan pulled him down on top of her, still joined together.

While he got his breath back, he pondered. Was he different? No, not really. He did not suddenly feel like a man. He had enjoyed the experience. He was grateful for the release. But he would have felt those things if Jan had only jacked him off.

How he saw himself was unchanged, he decided.

“Am I hurting you?” he asked.

“This is uncomfortable for a lot of women,” Jan said when she had caught her breath, “but as slender as you are, it feels nice to me.”

Jake rested for a minute and then spoke.

“I don’t feel any different. I’m still the same old Jake I was an hour ago.”

“You don’t want to crow that you’ve become a man now?”

“No. If I’ve become more of a man, I don’t see it. But something else changed.”

“What?”

“You are more precious to me. What we did wasn’t just pleasure, it was more. You shared yourself with me in a way that changed me.”

“How do you mean, Jake?”

“This is going to sound silly. The best I can think to say it is that you exposed yourself to me. You exposed your womb. You let my semen in. We could have just started a new life. We might become a family even though you belong to another man.”

He shared his feelings with Jan.

“Jake, love, I’m taking birth control.”

He kissed the side of her neck.

“Some couples who use birth control still have children. Some who don’t never do. That’s not the point. You could conceive. My seed might any minute join with your egg. Even if it’s unlikely, there is still the possibility. This thing we just did seems miles more intimate to me than kissing or masturbation or oral sex, even if it’s just in its symbolism. Don’t laugh at me, but I feel like we’ve joined with all the generations before and since. The cycle of life thing. I know it sounds corny, but that’s how I feel. And do you know what else I feel?”

“What?”

“Unless you tell me to go away, I’ll never leave you.”

There was a knock at the front door. From Ellen’s bedroom, Jake could vaguely sense a familiar mind.

“I’ll get it,” he said. He walked out to the living room, grabbed his pants, and pulled them on.

As he got closer, he recognized Dawn Finch, simultaneously excited and put out. Rod Finch was there, too. He was angry and excited and resenting that Jake was forcing him to put $100,000 into Carol’s college fund. There was a third mind, too, excited and expectant but poised and alert, not thinking any explicit thoughts.

Jake unlocked the door and started to pull it open. The door burst inward, hitting him in the head and chest. Jake dropped to the floor, dazed.

He became aware of Finch herding Dawn into the living room and setting her on the sofa. Ellen ran out of her bedroom. The third person, a man, grabbed her by the arm and pushed her down on the sofa, too. Jake saw that he was carrying a handgun. Fear shot through him. Jake had never seen the gunman before. Jake blankly watched him go into the bedroom.

“A house full of pretty women and this one naked,” he said. “This is turning into a good night,”

Jake felt blood dripping down his face. He struggled to get his wits back. He got to his feet and managed to stumble back to the living room.

“Not so tough now, are you?” Finch said.

“Jake, what did they do to you?” Ellen asked.

The other man looked at Jake and pointed the gun at him.

“Sit, boy. I’ll take care of you after I’ve sampled the pretty one in the bedroom.”

I won’t let them hurt you, Jake sent to Ellen and Jan. Stay calm and I’ll take care of this. He sent them calmness and reassurance.

“Who are you?” Jake asked.

“I told you those guys are not people you want to mess with, you stupid little fool,” Finch said.

Jake did not like the way he was leering at Ellen.

“Shut up, Finch,” The man called over his shoulder. “Jake Fielding, I am the man you spoke to on the phone last night. And I don’t much like to be threatened. You and I have some things to clear up. But first, I’m going to give you a metaphorical demonstration of what I do to people who mess with me.”

What was the name of the man Jake had called from Finch’s house? Miller? No, Masters. Colin Masters, the guy who ran the swingers club.

Jake focused on Masters’ mind and saw what was happening through his eyes. Masters had turned back to Jan who was huddled under a sheet still in Ellen’s bed. He grabbed the sheet and yanked it away. Jan lay there calmly.