Chapter 14

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Jake waited a minute for Ellen to get inside, and then he followed. As soon as he was in the door, Ellen grabbed him in a bone-crunching hug.

“Jake, that was the most fun I’ve ever had. It was perfect.”

“You were perfect, Mom. And you did so well.”

Jan Harrison walked out of the kitchen.

“You’re home so soon? I half expected you to make a night of it.”

“Jan wanted to hear how our date went,” Ellen said.

Jake hugged Jan tightly.

“Thank you for what you did for my mom,” he whispered. “You helped make this a great night for her.”

Jan smiled broadly.

“Give me a few minutes to wash my face and put on comfortable clothes,” Ellen said. “Then we’ll talk.”

Jake sat on the sofa and pulled Jan down on his lap.

“I’m sorry I ruined your dinner yesterday.”

“You did no such thing. I thought it was fascinating to see two exceptional men locking horns. Mark is really very accomplished. You can’t expect to go up against a man of his experience without getting a little bloody. You’re a smart young man. You’ll reflect on what happened and learn from it.”

Jake slowly rubbed his hand up and down her arm.

“Have you and Mark talked?”

“Sure we have. Mark is keen to find out how you learned of his little accounting peccadillo.”

“I don’t mean about depreciation. Did he say anything about you and me?”

“Yes, he surprised me. A lot. You were right. He’s known about my attraction for years, and it worried him.”

“Worries jealous or worries for your welfare?”

“Both, maybe. I think he was mostly worried that I would get into trouble. He is too confident in himself to think that he might lose me to a boy. After last week, though, I think he re-evaluated that and got plenty jealous. We had a long talk about it last night.”

“Did you get everything aired out?”

“We learned a lot about each other that we didn’t know. I think I learned more about him than he did about me.”

“Like what?”

“Would you believe that he’s willing to share me with boys if I need it to be happy. And that he wants me to share all my sexual experiences with him. I never realized that he was so open-minded.”

“He sounds like a great guy. What does he think about how risky it is for you to be involved with boys?”

“He wants me to be careful. He offered to help me choose them. He also said that I should get you to help me choose.”

“And what if I choose me?”

“Silly thing,” she said and laughed. “You’ve already been chosen.”

“So he’s okay with you and me?”

“He said that if I wanted you then it was okay with him.”

“He did?”

“Yes, and then I fucked him half to death.”

Ellen came out of her bedroom. She was wearing a new nightgown. It was made of thin cotton and was almost transparent. Her nipples were obvious. He could see the tint of her areolas and the triangle of her pubic hair.

“Do you like it, Jake?” Ellen asked. “Jan and I bought this, too.”

“It was a present for you and me,” Jan said to Jake.

“Mom, you’re so beautiful that I don’t know how I’ll keep myself from taking advantage of you.”

“Jake, don’t worry about taking advantage of me. After what you did for me this evening, anything that happens will be completely mutual. In fact, if I were you, I would worry about me taking advantage of you.”

“Did you talk to Mark about being attracted to women?” Jake asked Jan.

“Did you tell him about that?”

“No, but I did hint that he should find out if you had other sexual needs that he didn’t know about.”

“Yes, we talked about how I feel about women. I’ll tell you about it later. Right now, I suggest we go lie down on Ellen’s bed where we can talk in comfort.”

Jake went to his room and pulled three condoms from his book bag. He returned to his mother’s room and dropped the condoms on the bed stand. He took off his clothes except for his boxers.

“I can’t make love tonight. My first time is going to be with Julie.”

“Then what’s with the condoms,” Jan asked as she took off her clothes.

“Just to be on the safe side because I’m not feeling all that responsible at the moment. I won’t get my mom pregnant. And you and I haven’t talked about birth control. It’s the prudent thing.” He pulled back the bedclothes for Ellen. “Let’s snuggle here and talk about our date.”

Ellen lay beside Jake who put his arm around her and pulled her to him, she lay in the crook of his arm with her head on his shoulder. Jake caressed her arm with his free hand. Her breasts pressed into his side.

“It was so much fun, Jake. I love you.”

“And I, you.”

“Stop with the mushy stuff,” Jan said and sat Indian fashion beside Ellen. “I want to hear about the date. Ellen, did you see in him what you want to see in a date? How was his humor? Did he tell any jokes that were offensive or too sexual?”

“His jokes were too silly, maybe, but they didn’t make me uncomfortable.”

“Good. That is an important point to remember,” Jan said. “If your date makes you uncomfortable, don’t go out with him again. Whether that discomfort is caused by inappropriate humor or something else you don’t even understand, trust your instincts. Now, did he talk about things that interested you, or did he talk about himself and stuff he was interested in?”

“We mostly talked about me. Even when I turned the conversation toward Jake, he eventually moved it back to me.”

“That’s probably good, but it makes me a little suspicious. Was it like he was trying to avoid talking about himself? Did he seem like he was hiding something? A wife? A criminal past?”

“Not really. He talked about his business and this hot air thing. When he was done explaining that, he changed the topic back to me.”

“That’s a nice balance if he encouraged the conversation toward you but also talked easily about himself. That shows a good mix of openness and consideration for you. But how about this: did he stare at other women?”

“Oh, no. His eyes were only on me tonight. It made me feel so desirable.”

“Good. He gets bonus points. I think I’ll ask him out on a date with me soon.

“I don’t deserve praise,” Jake said. “It was easy for me. She was the most beautiful woman there. I didn’t notice anyone else.”

Ellen smiled at him.

“So tell me your judgment,” Jan asked Ellen. “Would you date him again? Do you want to get to know him better?”

“I’m a little concerned about the age difference and the fact that he’s my son, but his behavior was everything I could have hoped for. I’d date him again in a heartbeat.”

“I suspect he was on his best behavior,” Jan said. “And there’s a lesson in that, too. Some men will start out saying all the right things, but after a while, after the new wears off, they’ll revert more to how they really are. A man might be wonderful for the first couple of weeks, but that doesn’t mean he is showing you his real personality.

“Be alert for trends. He might slowly become more selfish or goatish or whatever than he appeared at first. Even if you find yourself falling in love with him, don’t let that blind you to your duty. Keep evaluating his character. Have you ever heard the expression ‘men are like buses’?”

“No, what does that mean?” Ellen asked.

“The saying is ‘Men are like buses. Another one will eventually come along.’ In your case, as gorgeous as you are, another will be coming along quite soon. So don’t worry about ending it with a guy up if a date goes bad.

“And remember this as well: the romance is just the package that the date comes in. Enjoy it. But you aren’t auditioning a man for his ability to be romantic. You want to find a man with character, a man who is unselfish and has self-control and integrity.”

“Mom, did you know that you were being tested, too? Just like you were doing to me?”

“You were evaluating me?”

“Yes, it works both ways. Tell me what happened when you went to the restroom.”

“I waited until then because I figured I wouldn’t have to worry about leaving my drinks unattended. I really had to go.”

“Good,” Jan said, “I’m glad you were attentive to date safety.”

“Mom, tell us about the man you talked to.”

She blushed and Jake felt nervousness from her.

“He stopped me and asked me for a date.”

“What did you tell him?”

“I said that I couldn’t talk then, but he insisted so I gave him my phone number and told him to call me later.”

Jake felt a sudden cold knot in his stomach. So this is what jealousy feels like, he thought. Ellen must have sensed it.

“What’s wrong, Jake? Did I handle it wrong?”

“Did he ask you for it or did you volunteer it?” Jan asked.

“He asked.”

“Did you recognize him from anywhere?” Jake asked.

“Yes, he was the guy you pointed out to me when we first sat down. The guy who kept staring at me.” She looked up at his face. “Please, Jake, tell me what’s wrong.”

“Oh, don’t let it worry you. You’re such a good student that I was expecting you to act like a more experienced woman would have. I let it hurt my feelings. That’s all.”

“I’m sorry, honey. How did I hurt your feelings?”

“By showing interest in another man when you were out with me.”

“But I didn’t want to. He just insisted.”

“Yes, I see that, and it’s not fair for me to get upset.”

“Ellen, let me explain a couple of things,” Jan said, “Maybe you’ll see why Jake reacted as he did. Asking for or giving a telephone number is a signal of romantic interest. When he asked for your number he was saying he was interested in you. Since you gave it to him, he will figure that you shared his interest. Jake assumed that, too, and that’s why he felt jealous.”

“But I just wanted to get rid of him,” Ellen said. “When he became insistent, I didn’t know what else to do.”

“Did you give him the right number?” Jan asked

“Yes, I gave him my home number.”

“Did you get his name?”

“No, I didn’t think to ask.”

“Well, you got rid of him for the moment,” Jan said, “but he will probably call tomorrow. What will you say then?”

“I don’t know. It’s so hard for me to say no.”

“Let’s see if we can find a reason for you to tell him no,” Jake said. “If you had been his date, would you have been happy with the way he conducted himself?”

“You mean because he was paying attention to me instead of his date?”

“Yes,” Jan said. “You have to wonder about a man whose eyes wander like that. Does he have a problem with self-control? If a man is out on a date, but he’s dogging another woman, that man is very likely a philanderer.”

“Mom, I should tell you something else,” Jake said. “If I were on a date with a girl and saw her gave another man her phone number, I would have ended the date right then and taken her home. I would never ask her out again.”

“Jake, I didn’t realize what I was doing.”

“I understand, Mom, and I don’t want you to feel bad. Sometimes people in relationships act emotionally, not rationally. That’s what I just did. I should have known that I don’t have to worry about your loyalty. Now that you know what’s up, you’ll handle it masterfully the next time. Let’s talk about the bigger problem, how to say no to people.”

“I don’t know why it’s so hard for me, Jake. When someone tries to get me to do something, I feel this big pressure on me. I don’t feel like I can say no. I’ve always been this way.”

“Let me show you this memory I saw in your mind. Jan, I’d like you to see this too.”

Jake replayed his memory of his grandfather demanding the young Ellen obey him.

“Mom, you recalled that memory on Wednesday night. That’s why I began crying.”

“I don’t remember my dad ever saying that to me.”

“I’m not sure why. The memory was definitely in your consciousness or I wouldn’t have been able to read it. What do you think, Jan?”

“What you saw may have been affecting Ellen but hadn’t arisen high enough in consciousness for her to be aware of it. Consciousness and the unconscious are complicated phenomena that nobody really understands. Jake, no researcher has the tools to study it that you do. You may have seen a repressed memory in action.”

“So I can access a person’s consciousness plus that part of the unconscious that is active enough to be influential at that moment?”

“Maybe. It’s just a thought.”

“It’s a theory and a good one. It accounts for the facts. You know, it’s too bad you’re a middle school teacher and not a psychology researcher. With your brains and my skills, we could learn a lot.”

“With an M.S. I could be a clinician. To be a researcher, I would need a Ph.D. I would have to think long and hard before deciding to go back to school.”

“Anyway, after Mom’s mind replayed that memory, she experienced a sense of surrender, like it was a relief that Granddad had made that decision for her. Jan, I’d like to hear what you think. Could that memory be responsible for my mom’s willingness to let other people tell her what to do?”

“That is a very hard question, Jake. You say that memory was triggered when her dad pushed Ellen to do something. Does it get triggered when anyone is trying to dominate her?”

“I don’t know, but with more observations, I should be able to see if that is the case. Do you think that memory of Granddad was triggered in the restaurant, too?”

“Lots of ways it could have been. Sometimes you just need more data to reduce the universe of possibilities. What if I commanded Ellen to do something? Would that help?”

“If Ellen knows what’s going on, it would skew her response. I’ll have to watch her in real-life situations.”

“That’s not what you said you did when you first saw that memory. You just reminded her of something that had happened in her past.”

“You’re right. What I actually did was suggest that she should have acted contrary to what her father made her do.”

“You know I’m sitting right here, right?” Ellen said. “Whatever you do, I’m going to know that it’s not the real thing.”

“She’s got us there,” Jake said, laughing. “You and I will have to be sneaky about this. I’ve got an idea that appeals to my sense of justice. I’ll tell you later.”

“Ellen,” Jan asked, “when that man asked you for a date at the restaurant, did that arouse you sexually?”

“No, it scared me. I just wanted to get away from him.”

“It doesn’t sound like a sexual kink,” Jan said. “It was more like a conditioned response triggered by one or more formative encounters from when you were growing up.

“Ellen, you are a paradox. With your looks, men want you badly, and yet, even though you can’t say no, you have no experience with them.”

“Before college, I always stayed home. Since then, I’ve been so afraid of men that when they try to talk to me, I shy away from them. I wouldn’t let them close enough to pressure me. But no matter what you two say, I must not be that approachable because not that many men have tried to talk to me.”

“Mom, could you say no to me if I pressed you to do something?”

“Why would I want to do that? I know you have my best interest at heart.”

“I’m glad you trust me, but I’m worried that you can’t stand up for yourself. What happens if you’re on a date and the man wants to invite himself into the apartment? If he presses you, then what?”

She looked at Jake for a moment.

“I guess I’d be in a pickle.”

“I think, for the time being, you shouldn’t date. Not until we have this problem resolved. Can you live with that?”

“You’re my man. I don’t need anyone else.”

“Mom, you are so going to break my heart someday. Part of me wants to keep you for myself. Someday you’re going to find a man. I think it’s something you need, no matter how jealous that makes me.”

He pulled Ellen to a sitting position in the middle of the bed.

“Jan, would you help me show Ellen just how desirable she really is?”

Jan knelt beside Ellen. While Jake kissed Ellen and stroked her face and neck, Jan kissed Ellen’s shoulders and arms. She reached down to the hem of Ellen’s nightgown and pulled it up and off, causing Ellen’s large breasts to bobble.

Jake returned to kissing and stroking while Jan brought her mouth to Ellen’s left breast. Jan kissed all around the breast and sucked on the nipple. She stroked Ellen’s belly for a minute and then moved her hand down toward Ellen’s mons. Ellen moaned into Jake’s mouth. Just the anticipation of Jan touching her sex pushed her arousal high.

Jake projected Ellen’s emotions and sensations to Jan. Jan’s eyes snapped to Jake. It took her a few moments to realize what was happening. Jan pushed Ellen onto her back and experimented by touching different parts of Ellen’s body, starting with her breasts and working down. She giggled when she nuzzled Ellen’s belly button and felt the fluttering it caused in Ellen’s stomach muscles. Jan almost lost herself in Ellen’s anticipation and arousal when she probed around Ellen’s vulva with her tongue.

After the quick survey, Jan returned to Ellen’s breasts. She circled a nipple lightly with her fingers and then nudged the nipple back and forth. When she pinched it, she learned what Jake had found out earlier. The more pressure she applied, the higher it pushed Ellen’s arousal. Ellen quickly climbed toward climax. Jan pinched Ellen’s other nipple, and Ellen crested and screamed out her orgasm.