Chapter 12

Saturday, May 29, 2010

“How do you feel today, Jake?”

“You mean about last night? Relieved, Mom. Like a huge weight has been lifted. I just felt so guilty about my father.”

“For the boy who’s so smart about people, you sure misread me. How could I reject you?”

They pulled into the Harrisons’ circular drive. Ellen was wearing a short suede jacket over a white blouse and a light brown floral skirt that came below her knees.

“Mom, you look great tonight. I think you are the most beautiful woman in the world.”

“You are sweet, Jake. You make me feel good.”

Jake projected into her mind the sensations, thoughts, and emotions he had when he looked at her—the image and the smell, the way she aroused him, his affection for her, his pride at being her son, his pride at being her escort that evening. Ellen stared ahead, her mouth open. Then her eyes started to water.

“Jake Fielding, what are you doing to me?”

“Those are the emotions that I’m feeling.”

“You make me want to kiss you to death. Is that really how you see me?”

“That’s the most honest way I know to communicate.”

She grabbed him and pulled him close for a hug.

“Mom, I have dinner reservations at L’Espalier. Would you join me for dinner tomorrow night?”

“How can you do that? Isn’t it kind of pricy?”

“I wouldn’t ask you out without being sure that I could take care of you properly. Just like I wouldn’t let you go out with a man who didn’t understand his obligation to respect you and take care of you. You will also insist on that.”

Jake felt her surprise. He had made her feel prized. She was wondering if she could really expect men to treat her that way.

“Uh, there is one thing. I can’t drive. Would you?”

She laughed. “If you had driven up to take me to dinner, it would have become my parental duty to investigate. As it is, I would love to go out with you. And since you are not very forthcoming about your financial resources, I’ll ignore that, too, if you’ll assure me it’s all aboveboard.”

“It’s all good. I promise. You might want to wear that wonderful blue dress you showed me Wednesday.”

“Oh, I didn’t think about that. I’ll have to look over my wardrobe and decide what to wear. This is going to be fun.”

Her smile warmed Jake. She was broadcasting happiness, excitement, gratitude, and her constant, unrelenting arousal.

She leaned forward and kissed him briefly but firmly.

“We had better go inside,” she said.

Jake got out of the car and looked at the Harrisons’ house. It had two stories and was bigger than any house he had ever seen. It stood on the shore of the lake. He could see no other houses in either direction.

Jan answered their knock. She wore a blue-green sweater and white beachcomber pants. Behind her was a tall man with gray hair. Jake felt anticipation, affection, and arousal from Jan directed equally at him and his mother.

Jake focused on Mark Harrison’s mind. Uh oh, this could be trouble, he thought. Mark Harrison was anxious. He felt prickly, jealous and scared. Still, he could not help but be captivated by Ellen. He smiled welcomingly as Jan made introductions, and then he looked at Jake curiously.

“So you’re the wunderkind that Jan thinks is so special.”

“Did she say that?” Jake said, smiling. “Well, I could talk all day about how I think she is the most amazing person I’ve ever met.”

“Come and sit down,” Jan said, “and you can call our mutual admiration society to order while I get you something to drink. Coke for you, Jake?”

“Yes, please.”

“We’ve got nice red and white wines, Ellen.”

“Red wine, please.”

“Can I ask what you do for a living, Mr. Harrison?” Jake asked.

“I build commercial buildings and residential developments.”

“Is business good?”

“Now that the subprime-mortgage crisis is behind us, my business is on the upswing, not that we were ever really in any trouble.”

“That’s just his day job,” Jan said, coming back into the room with Jake’s drink. “Tell Jake about your charity work.”

“It’s not much really. Just a way to give back a little. I’ve been fortunate.”

“Don’t you believe him, Jake. He’s involved with a street shelter in the city and the Salvation Army. He’s very active and very generous.”

“Hush, wife. Those are things where the right hand shouldn’t know what the left hand is doing.”

“Mark is very modest. If I don’t toot his horn once in a while, no one would ever know.”

“And that that would be fine with me.” He turned to Ellen. “What is it that you do?”

“I’m a stock analyst. JPMorgan Chase.”

“What companies do you concentrate on?”

“I’m a jack of all trades. Our office is focused on regional businesses. There aren’t enough of us analysts to specialize. I do know something about Harrison Properties. That’s your company, isn’t it?”

“That’s what keeps me off the streets.”

“More than that. You stayed in the black every quarter through the downturn. There were a lot of real estate businesses, including some builders, that didn’t make it through at all.”

“The secret is not to get greedy during the boom times. That way you don’t have to service a bunch of debt when cash flow slows.”

“How aggressive will you be this coming year?”

As they became engrossed in shoptalk, Jake looked over at Jan. She was watching him.

Hey, beautiful.

Jan looked startled and then smiled.

I want to say who, except someone without a pulse, wouldn’t be interested in you that way. But I know there are exclusively heterosexual women. I look at you, and I want to tell them they don’t know what they’re missing. Jake smiled at her. You don’t have to worry about that with Mom. She thinks you’re very sexy.

She smiled back.

You are such a flirt. You make me feel good.

Jake sensed a feeling of disgruntlement. He pulled his eyes away from Jan and realized that Mark had been staring at him as he had been apparently gazing silently at Jan.

It seems mind talk has its own dangers, Jan.

“Jan, you wouldn’t believe what happened today,” Jake said. “It hit the fan with Carol Finch.”

“That’s the girl you wanted me to talk to?”

“Yes. Leanne DeRizzo, Julie’s mom, learned that Carol’s father was planning on taking her to this swingers party and, well, deflower her. She managed to get Carol removed from her home. Carol’s parents agreed to give up custody.”

“Mrs. DeRizzo learned all that? How exactly?”

“Well, Julie and I were visiting Carol this morning and we overheard Mr. and Mrs. Finch saying some very scary things. Carol was strong throughout the whole thing. I’m hoping it will be a positive development, especially getting her away from her parents. The more I learned about them, the more they seemed like bad news.”

“Call me anytime you can arrange for me to have a session with her. I’ll want you to be there.” She looked over at Mark. “Jake can read people so well it’s spooky. If I had a counseling practice, I would hire him to sit in and share his observations.”

“I don’t want to be dismissive, Jake, but you’re only thirteen,” Mark said. “How can you do that? I’ll be fifty in a few years, and I can’t read people like that.”

“You’re sandbagging, Mr. Harrison. In the fifteen minutes since I’ve met you it’s obvious that you’re very perceptive.”

“Jake, not even the interns at my company call me Mr. Harrison. Mark will do just fine.”

“Thanks, Mark. Look at this house. You’ve got to be loaded. I bet you have a state-of-the-art entertainment room.”

He laughed.

“Not up to the minute but still pretty good. Want to see it?”

“That would be great. Mom, Mark’s going to show me his entertainment room. The Rangers are playing a doubleheader today. Maybe we can get the score of the first game.”

Jan, we’re going to have a heart-to-heart. I need to head off trouble.

Jake, I’m not sure this is a good idea.

Trust me. There’s more of an upside than you might think. Ask my mom about her upcoming date. Please, tell her what she needs to know when she goes. Especially what she needs to know to be safe from predators.

“This way, Jake,” Mark said.

He led Jake through the house, up a back staircase, and down a hall to a room with a large HDTV and speakers mounted along the walls. He grabbed a remote and turned on the baseball game. The picture was gorgeous. Jake took the remote and hit the mute button.

“You’re worried that Jan might be having an inappropriate relationship with me, aren’t you?”

“Yes, how could you tell?”

“I can see the disapproval on your face. Besides, Jan and I haven’t exactly been hiding our affection for each other. I guess I should apologize. I wasn’t thinking about appearances, and I’ve given you cause to be upset. That was inconsiderate of me.”

“So, are you?”

“Having an inappropriate relationship? No, I think it’s very appropriate, but I’m not sure that you would agree with me. Still, I think that things are not as bad as you fear. Let’s start from the beginning. Tell me what it is about Jan that concerns you.”

“I’m the aggrieved husband. I think it would be better for you to tell me what you’re doing with her.”

“I’m guessing that your negotiation skills are one reason why Harrison Properties does so well. But no, not this time. You first. I promise that I’ll be frank once I understand what your concerns are. Why are you worried about that achingly beautiful woman you’ve married and a thirteen-year-old boy?”

“You’re playing with me, aren’t you?”

“I’m trying to do you a good turn, Mark. Why else would I drag you up here so that we could talk alone? Answer my question. What are you worried about?”

“I know that she has a weak spot for boys. I’ve known that almost as long as I’ve known her.”

“How do you know that?”

“Besides the fact that she is wasting that brilliant mind of hers teaching you young shits? Or the fact that she comes home from school smelling like she’s in heat? How about the fact that I’ve watched her struggle for years to keep her distance from boys. That was until this week. All of a sudden, she is mooning about one of them like a schoolgirl with a crush.”

“If you knew that she was fascinated by boys, why did you marry her?”

“I could see that she didn’t want to give in to it. I thought I could help her. Besides, even knowing about it, I wanted her. Except for her thing with boys, she’s my ideal woman. I mean look at her. She’s got looks, brains, grace. She’s loving. She’s one in a million.”

“You realize, don’t you, that even if I had never met Jan, your marriage would still be in trouble?”

“Yes, I’ve seen that. I’ve seen her getting bored with me. Becoming more distant.”

“And knowing all that, do you still want her?”

“I will never willingly give her up. If all I had was a chance to talk to her at breakfast every other Saturday morning, I would take it.”

“Are you willing to change your attitudes about sex and relationships if it will help you keep her?”

“You are not a boy. You are some kind of demon. Adults have trouble talking about these things, and yet you just throw this stuff out like you’re Dr. Ruth.”

“Do you remember that Tiger Woods putt at the players championship a couple years ago? The one where he’s about fifty feet away across two separate ridges. The ball broke sharp left, then sharp right and dropped into the cup.”

“Yes, I saw it. What’s your point?”

“I won’t waste time with false humility. I’m like Tiger Woods except that my skills work with people, not golf clubs. I can read them. I understand them, usually better than they understand themselves. I can help them with whatever is making them unhappy. Now answer me because this is important. Are you willing to consider a new way to look at the moral issues? Would you share her if it were the only way to have her at all?”

“Are you telling me that I have to do that to save my marriage?”

“Yes, but it’s even more important than that. You may have to do it to save Jan. What kind of life would she have if she lost control? We live in the post-Mary Kay Letourneau era. What if one of those boys decides to talk to the authorities? Or tries to blackmail her?”

“Wouldn’t it be better if she just got a better hold of herself?”

“Do you really think that’s an option?”

“It’s worked for her for years.”

“No, it hasn’t. She managed by force of will to live like that, but the toll has been high. Including accepting a passionless marriage in a last-ditch attempt to stave off her need.”

“It’s not that bad, damn it. She loves me.”

“Yes, she does love you, but it is that bad. Now we are getting to the point I want to make. It doesn’t have to be like this. If you’re willing to expand your boundaries you can save your marriage, her reputation, and maybe her life.”

“Just which boundaries are you suggesting I stretch?”

“You have to get beyond your conventional morality.”

“You want me to do stuff I think is wrong?”

“I’m not necessarily suggesting that you do anything at all yourself, although there are some things you could do that would go a long way. What you’re saying is wrong is something that Jan needs. It’s hardwired into her makeup. You need to help her express it in a way that doesn’t cause any harm to herself or anyone else.”

“You want me to stand in the face of centuries of custom and law?”

“Yes, exactly. The first step is that you’ve got to change the foundation of your morality. Can you adopt an ethic that says that if one’s actions don’t hurt anyone else then they are permissible?”

“Well, sure. That’s what I believe anyway. And I don’t think that does conflict with centuries of custom and law.”

“I’m surprised that you think that. I’ll bet you that in two minutes I can think up a dozen laws where it is a crime to do something that doesn’t hurt anyone. What is a law, but a one-size-fits-all moral solution? Well, one size doesn’t fit all. The law doesn’t recognize your wife’s needs and it doesn’t consider the fact that if she is careful, she can meet her needs without hurting the boys or herself or you.”

“It would be better if she just did what the law requires.”

“She could obey the law, but she wouldn’t be happy. She also wouldn’t be herself anymore. It would be like telling you to give away Harrison Properties. Give up the challenge and the status and the other rewards of being the CEO, and go get a job on an assembly line instead. You could do it but why? Who would benefit?”

“How can she have sex with boys, without hurting them?”

“Mark, that’s the first stupid thing I’ve heard you say. If she is careful who she selects, Jan’s kink isn’t going to harm the boy. You were probably a reasonably well-adjusted thirteen-year-old. Don’t tell me you wouldn’t have offered up both of your thumbs to have a romance with a woman like Jan. So you tell me, would you have been better or worse off if you had?”

“I would have loved it, of course. And I can’t see how it would have hurt me.”

“Good. Now let’s get back to the point. I’m asking you to love your wife. Can you allow her to share with you this part of her personality? At the very least, can you tell her that you know and accept that this is part of her makeup? Even if she doesn’t take a single step toward consummating her desire for boys, you two can talk about the attraction, about what kinds of boys arouse her, what she wants to do with them, and what she would like you to do to share that part of her life. She craves that kind of intimacy with you. She just doesn’t realize it because of her fear of how you would react. Deep down, she wants to involve you in these things, not hide them from you. They are important to her.”

“You said that’s the very least. What other things?”

“There’s a whole range including helping her choose a boy to be with, talking afterward about what happened, watching her with him, and having a threesome centered on Jan. The most extreme thing would be having a threesome centered on the boy. I would be surprised if you opted for that one, and it has its own problems, but my point is that somewhere in that range of possibilities is a choice that you can live with, a set of actions that hurt nobody, but that let Jan be Jan.”

“So you want me to participate when Jan makes love to you.”

“That’s the second stupid thing you’ve said. No, I take that back. I guess I can see how you might have jumped to that conclusion. Mark, Jan is not my lover, she’s my auntie.”

“I know you’re not related to her. What do you mean by auntie?”

“An auntie is an older woman who trains a young man. It’s an idea I got from a science fiction story. Our society, though, isn’t healthy enough to allow such a thing to exist. Jan’s teaching me about women and sexual relationships and life and scores of things in areas where I lack experience, no matter how good my people skills are.

“We have not had intercourse. Truth be told, I’m saving myself for a very special girl my own age. And I hope it won’t be much longer because all the stimulation is killing me.

Mark looked at Jake with some skepticism.

“I guess I better explain it all. We haven’t had sexual intercourse, but there has been some contact. Call it hands-on training. Jan is a great teacher—generous and patient.

“The initiative for us to get together was all mine. She resisted gamely. I admit that it wasn’t my finest hour. I wanted to be taught, and I decided that she would be my teacher. I figured out her weakness, and I used it to overcome her resistance. It was only as I got to know her better that I learned how remarkable Jan is. Would it be hypocritical for me to plead for leniency because I’m only thirteen and sometimes still act impulsively and selfishly?”

“That’s a remarkable confession, Jake. It almost makes me not want to wring your little philandering neck.”

“Well, I’ve said my piece. How do you want to handle this when we return to the women?”

“What do you think?”

“Honesty is usually the best policy.”

“Does your mom know about you and Jan?”

“She just learned about us last night.”

“I’m not going to go back there and talk about this in front of you and your mother. But Jan and I will talk when we’re alone.”

“And how are you going to approach that talk?”

“I want to keep her, and I want her to be happy. I’ll talk frankly with her about how to do that.”

“When you do, keep one other thing in mind. You may not yet know the full breadth of Jan’s sexuality. Ask her if any other things arouse her.”

“I’ve known her for four years. What else can there be?”

“Ask her,” Jake said and stood up. “How do you get back to the living room from here? I’m worried that I might get lost.”

“This way, Jake.”

He led Jake back the way they had come.

“Mark, do you ever go fishing?”

“Yes. It’s the excuse I use to get away and think.”

“When this whole thing shakes out, there’s a chance we may end up being friends. If you want to talk about things, why don’t you invite me along? But you should know that I’ve never had a father, and you’ll have to teach me how to fish.”

Mark laughed. “I’ll say this for you, Jake. You know how to assert yourself.”

Jake stiffened at that. “Maybe so, but I think that you’re missing the point. I could go my whole life without fishing and never miss it. But it wouldn’t hurt for us to get to know each other better.”

“Young man, what makes you think that I’m anxious to get to know you? You’re interfering in my marriage and, frankly, I don’t appreciate it.”

Jake stopped him before they got to the stairs.

“Mr. Harrison, you may be about to make a very large mistake. Before you do, there are a couple of things you should think about. I love Jan, and I will be in her life for many years to come. She loves me, too. She also needs me, and she knows it.”

“I think you’re wrong. I think you’re most of the way through your shelf life. Some day you won’t look so boyish. When that happens, you’ll be gone.”