Life Is a Soap Opera
Copyright© 2008 by HLD
Chapter 21
"Gabe, we have to talk," Bailey said, setting their plates down on the table.
Both were wearing their bathrobes to ward off the evening chill.
"About what, honey?" he poured two glasses of filtered water. They sat at the table and started their meal.
Bailey only picked at her food. "About next year ... about me moving to New York with you."
His head shot up, his eyes wide.
She took a deep breath. "Gabe ... you know I love you."
He frowned. "But..."
"I can't move," she said softly, hoping he wouldn't be angry. "I'm not ready."
"Bailey ... I—"
"No, wait," she held up her hand. "A part of me wants to. You have swept me off of my feet and you're the perfect gentleman. But I'm a small town girl. It's been hard enough moving to the city to go to college. I don't know that I'm ready for New York. And I don't know if I can leave April and my folks."
He didn't say anything for several long moments. He didn't look angry, which was good.
"I also ... I mean," Bailey paused to gather her thoughts. Even though she had rehearsed this conversation over and over in her mind, she was drawing a blank. "I know you and I have a lot going against us. There's the age and the distance thing ... but I want to make 'us' work and I know you do, too."
She fidgeted for a second.
"However ... if we don't work out ... if something happens, I need to know that I can make it on my own," she didn't dare look him in the eyes. "I at least want to finish at BCC. If I moved to New York with you, what would I do? I'm sure I can't afford college there. And I don't want you supporting me, either."
"I understand," he said quietly, and she got the feeling that he did. "Bailey, I miss you ... you can't know how much I wish you were with me all the time. But I don't want to rush you or rush us. At the same time, I wonder if you'll still want me in four years when you graduate."
"Oh, Gabe..."
"People do a lot of growing up from the age of eighteen to twenty-one," Gabe said, his voice even. "What if you decide you want someone else? I wouldn't blame you. I can't leave my life behind. And I know I can't ask you to give up who you are or leave your family."
"I won't want anyone else," her voice began to quiver.
"How do you know, Bailey?" For the first time she could remember, she saw fear in his eyes.
"I don't know," she whispered.
Neither spoke for a long time.
"We've lasted through my first year of college," Bailey smiled weakly. "We can make it three more."
"I know, Bailey. You don't know how much you've changed my life. All for the better." He reached out and took her hands. "I will do whatever I have to in order to make 'us' work. I will fly home every weekend if I have to. I will bring you to New York. I just want you in my life."
"I want that, too," she said. "I'm sorry you have to wait around for me—"
"Don't be."
"—And I know that I want you in my life, too," she smiled weakly. "I will do whatever I have to for 'us' but I have to make sure that I'm doing the best thing for me, too. And right now, that means going to school and getting my degree."
That much was true. Despite her judgment being clouded by love, she was level-headed enough to know that her future was dependent on finishing college rather than landing a sugar daddy. When she looked in his eyes, she saw that Gabe knew it, too.
He shocked her by standing suddenly. He extended his hand and Bailey took it.
"We've got the rest of this week before I go back to New York," Gabe said, drawing her to her feet. "I'll be home again in two weeks for your birthday and then I want you to come see me once the summer session is over. We'll figure out the rest later."
Bailey smiled with relief. This had gone a lot better than she had anticipated. Of course, in her mind, she had run through all of the worst case scenarios, up to and including him throwing her out and them breaking up.
Without another word, Gabriel led her back to their master bedroom, the meal forgotten.
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