Chapter 50: The Ceremony

Thursday, April 14, 2005 (Continued)

Julia announced, "Everyone sit down please. Mark and Carol, please come to the front with me."

While we were carrying out her instructions, Julia also quietly asked me to put my ring on.

Julia got me to stand with my back to the rear wall, in the middle of a six-foot wide alcove created by the stands of flowers and burning candles. Julia placed two very small, silk (or satin?) pillows on the floor about two feet in front of me, and two feet to either side. Julia knelt behind the pillow to my right, so she was facing diagonally in toward me. She indicated that Carol should kneel behind the other pillow. The audience could see the girls in rear profile.

As Carol was kneeling, Julia asked, "Mark, please put our rings on our pillows." Which I did manually, NOT using TK in front of Donna and The Boys. The dangers of the wrong people finding out about TK had been mentioned many times in the last few hours, so I was very wary about it now.

Julia addressed the audience, "I'm going to shorten the ceremony because we've had a long, tiring conversation and the mood is less excited and celebratory than I'd anticipated." No one argued with her. After three hours of highly emotional discussion, the mood was certainly strained.

Julia started reciting what I could tell was her mentally rehearsed speech, "Everyone here is aware that this is not a legal wedding, but other than its legality - which has very little power to keep people together anyway - this is in every other sense a wedding. We are offering Mark our vows and love, witnessed by our immediate families. In my heart this is greater than any wedding I ever dreamed of, not only because Mark is a greater man than I ever expected to marry, but because the degree of commitment I am making to him today is greater than I would've made in a traditional marriage.

^-- "Carol has very little idea of what is about to happen, she just knows that she wants to marry two people that she loves and who love her. She is leaping into this commitment blind as to its details, which speaks highly of her faith in her new spouses, and of her love for us. Carol has yet to hear the vows that she will be called upon to commit to. I will recite them shortly, and she may choose whether or not to make them to Mark.

^-- "Those of you who witnessed Mark's demonstration will have greater understanding of the import of these vows. To the others of you - Andrew, Robert and Donna - I'm sorry you won't understand the background to some of what you will hear shortly. You will understand the words though, and you will appreciate how important they are to us.

^-- "Although we are calling this a wedding and a marriage, there is no one that we are calling a 'husband'. Carol and I are offering ourselves as wives to our 'Lord': a man greater than we are. This is not an exchange of vows among equals. Carol and I are not the equal of our Lord. Consequently we will be making vows to Mark, and he will be accepting them or not, as he wishes. He will not be making vows to us. He is our Lord and may at all times do as he wishes. He is not to be bound by vows to us.

^-- "Carol and I will not be offering vows to each other. We are pledging ourselves, in our entirety, to Mark. If he accepts us both, then we will both consider ourselves his wives. That we love each other means we will consider ourselves wives to each other, but that is not the purpose or a requirement of this ceremony. At all times our relationship with and duty toward our Lord takes precedence over our relationships with our wife or wives.

^-- "The audience will not be asked, 'Does anyone here know of any reason why these people should not, etc.' You are not participants. This is a private commitment, from Carol and me to Mark. You are here as witnesses only because I would not deny you your seeing this.

^-- "If Mark would please hold up his left hand," I did so. "You will see that he's already wearing his ring. This ceremony does not include anyone putting a ring on Mark. He is a superior human and the Lord already. He will put a ring on each of us though, to indicate his acceptance of our vows.

^-- "You will observe that Mark's ring, and the rings in front of Carol and me, are of red gold. Rings, being a never-ending circle represent forever. We've chosen to use red gold to represent our blood and thus our life. We will be offering our life to our Lord forever, for him to use as he wishes.

^-- "I will now offer my vows to my Lord. After I have offered them, Mark may or may not accept them. If she chooses to, Carol will then offer the same vows, to which Mark will respond as he wishes. The ceremony will then be over.

^-- "Carol, darling, just watch what I am about to do and listen to my vows. You do not need to memorize anything because I'll prompt you when it's your turn. Just relax, listen and understand, okay?"

A wide-eyed Carol nodded. There were a few more wide-eyes in the audience too, as this was not what they expected! With the exception of Vanessa, I noticed. She wasn't surprised, instead she seemed very happy and proud.

Julia picked up her pillow carefully to ensure the ring remained balanced on it, then she swiveled around to face me, "Mark, my Lord, I offer you three lifelong Vows and a Gift:

^-- "First, I Vow to Serve. I offer my life in servitude to you. Your goals, needs and desires are forever paramount over mine. I will expend my life serving you to the best of my ability.

^-- "Second, I Vow to Obey. I will always obey your every order, voiced or anticipated, to the best of my ability.

^-- "Third, I Vow to Protect. I will protect you from all ill and harm, to the best of my ability. If the situation requires it, I will joyously sacrifice my life to protect yours.

^-- "Fourth, I offer you the Gift of my Love. Love cannot be vowed, as it may be denied and can be lost. Regardless, I offer it to you.

^-- "Lastly, in explanation to you all, especially to Carol. These vows are lifelong. I cannot and will not break them. They are the strongest I can make. I fully intend to die rather than break them. Mark may cancel them whenever he wishes, as that is his right as my Lord, but I may never do that myself. I am offering Mark all of my life, I am holding nothing back. All my worldly goods are his, everything that I am is his, and all my time is his - all to do with as he wishes.

^-- "Mark may also accept my Vows without my Gift. I will still be bound by my Vows even if he does not wish to accept my love.

^-- "The reason for my earlier statement that the audience may not object should be clear by now: no one's opinion takes precedence over that of the man I recognize as my Lord.

^-- "Having offered my Vows and Gift, I offer my ring to Mark." Julia raised the ring-bearing pillow with her right hand. Her left hand was palm up, with fingers spread, beside and level with the pillow. "If you wish to accept my Vows and my Gift, to become my Lord and Love, please take the ring and place it on my engagement finger. If you wish to accept my Vows but not my Gift, place the ring on my little finger; being yet farther away from the superior finger on which you wear your Lordship ring. If you do not wish to accept me at all, place my ring in my palm and command me to take it away."

Julia fell silent, and waited.

It was a pity I couldn't use TK to put the ring on as it was so appropriate that it cried out to be done, but the argument had convinced me to be very guarded about revealing it. I carefully picked up Julia's ring with my right hand, made sure I knew which finger was its destination as her hand was confusingly palm up, and slid it onto her engagement finger. As I did so, I used TK to stroke her right cheek, the one that was out of sight of the audience.

As soon as it was clear that her ring was going onto her engagement finger, Julia visibly struggled to control her voice, to say, "Thank you, my Lord."

The audience started speaking, but Julia very firmly announced, "Please do not interrupt. Carol is next."

Julia shakily lowered her pillow to the floor, took a deep breath, and then looked up at Carol to ask, "Did you understand everything I said, Carol? Do you have any questions?"

Carol answered with conviction, "I understand and I don't have any questions. It was beautiful and perfect. Thank you, Julia."

I'd been focused on Julia and hadn't thought about Carol's willingness to take those vows. When we'd turned to Carol I'd had a few seconds to wonder about her reaction, but Carol was smiling happily, so everything seemed fine - although it was hard to describe those vows as just "fine"! Julia had outdone herself big time. Carol's answer removed the last of my doubts about what her feelings were.

It also affected Mom the same way. Mom had to ask, "Are you sure, Carol? This sounds very serious."

I could tell Julia was about to respond, and I feared it was not going to be very politic, so put my hand on her head to catch her attention, and said a quiet, "Shh."

Carol said, "It doesn't SOUND serious, Mom; it IS serious. I'm even more sure about this than Julia is. This relationship is PERFECT for me." I saw that it was too, as it stressed subservience so strongly.

Julia wasn't allowing further interruptions. "Carol, if you wish to offer yourself to Mark, pick up your pillow and turn to face him." Carol immediately did so.

I glanced at Mom. She looked decidedly unhappy and I feared she was about to cause trouble. Mom started drawing breath to say something that I was sure I didn't want to hear, so I centered myself then TK-stroked the side of Mom's left cheek quite strongly. Not as a caress, but a message about my power.

Mom quickly turned her head left, but there was nothing to see of course. I created several fingers, grasped her chin and lower cheek on both sides, to give a rough simulation of the feeling of a real hand grasping her chin, and I pushed her face around until it was pointing directly at me. I gave a slight frown, then I used a couple more fingertips to pinch Mom's lips quite forcefully together. Her eyes were WIDE open, but she kept her mouth shut. TK can be VERY useful! I canceled the fingertips holding her head, but kept the pinch on her lips going for a few more seconds before canceling those too.

Julia had been saying, "Carol, repeat after me please."

Julia repeated the Vows and Gift, with pauses for Carol to say them to me.

Carol, in segments, recited the vows and what Julia had called "the Gift".

Julia asked, "Carol, do you understand that your vows are for life and that you cannot withdraw them? Only Mark may do so. If he accepts your vows, you are bound to him for the rest of your life, whether or not he accepts the Gift of your love."

Carol said, "I understand, and will never break my Vows or take back my Gift."

Julia smiled and continued to instruct Carol, "Hold the pillow just with your right hand, and raise it slightly. Open your left hand and position it palm up next to the pillow. Repeat after me..."

With Julia's prompts, Carol recited the offer of and instructions for how I could accept her ring.

I did for Carol what I'd done for Julia: placing her ring on her engagement finger and TK-caressing her hidden cheek.

Unlike Julia, Carol made no attempt whatsoever to control her sobs. She burst, and they poured out of her. Julia, obviously thinking they were a good idea now, rushed the couple of steps to sit beside Carol, took her in her arms, and they sobbed together. I was left standing there, wondering what to do. And wishing I had brought a LOT more hankies.

I knelt in front of my wives and put my arms around them, "There, there."

Moments later Prof arrived and, with two flourishes, produced a hanky for each girl.

Things got more than a little chaotic after that.

Vanessa was bawling already, and came over to join the girls so they could all bawl together. [I found out later that she'd helped write the vows. Knowing what to expect, she'd been able to enjoy the ceremony. When females enjoy weddings they cry because the wiring of their brains is weird.]

Prof seemed reasonably comfortable. I guessed Julia might have talked to her parents about the content of the ceremony, so they weren't as surprised as they might have been. He came around to me and offered me his hand to shake. Figuring the three criers could comfort and/or encourage each other without me - being male I wasn't sure what they were doing - I stepped away and accepted his handshake.

Prof said, "Congratulations, my boy. I guess I can call you 'Son' now, except not 'Son-In-Law' as the law doesn't know about this ceremony. Maybe you're my 'Son-Out-Law'? Haha."

His joke was obviously one he'd thought of earlier, but rather than responding to that, I had to ask him, "I'm surprised how accepting you are of such a one-sided relationship?"

"You've got a lot to learn about females, Mark, haha." He was deliberately jerking my chain, but knowing that didn't help me at all. I'm going to end up with that expression engraved on my tombstone, as it's obviously going to follow me to my grave. I wondered what I had to learn this time.

Prof enjoyed a good chuckle at my expense, then he explained, "That ceremony didn't create a one-sided relationship between Julia and you, it only explicitly stated what she already thought of the existing relationship. I admit she's got some rather unusual thoughts on the matter, but I understand her thinking and don't see any reason to disagree with her. I also suspect the relationship won't be as one-sided as it might seem."

#1: <He's no dummy is Prof, and he obvious does know a thing or two about females.>

Then he added, "The ceremony was mostly for your and Carol's benefit, and as it turned out, for your parents as well."

I didn't really understand, but I still managed to have the feeling he was right.

"You should circulate, Mark. Go and talk with your family. I'll look after this lot, I've got plenty more handkerchiefs." Yep, he knew about females.

I walked around the criers and headed to my family. Halfway there Donna rushed up and gave me a big hug. "That was INCREDIBLE. I've never heard of anything like that before! It was so beautiful. I'm so glad I was able to see it. And it's so great that you and Carol are going to be lovers, that's wonderful too. The three of you are going to have great times. Everything is wonderful."

Donna was far more grown up than I expected. Two weeks ago I was afraid of saying the word "virginity" in front of her, but lately she's helped Carol and me be intimate physically, and now she's totally accepting of the whole ceremony, even seeming to understand the implications.

I was going to compliment her, but was interrupted by The Boys joining us. Andrew said, "Well, I've never heard of anything like that before."

Donna laughed, and said, "That's exactly what I just said. Your sister is very unusual."

Andrew replied, "I never used to think she was, but after this - phew! This takes the cake."

#1: <Oh, good thought! Is there any wedding cake? I'm hungry. I imagine the rest of you are too.>

#2: <What's the chance Vanessa forgot to provide food?>

#1: <You're right. She's going to be a wonderful mother-in-lawlessness isn't she? I wonder where it is?>

#2: <Haha, good one on the "lawlessness". We must remember to tell that one to Prof. Food after we've circulated a bit. Hold your horses.>

I agreed, "Yeah, Julia certainly is imaginative. She sure surprised me!"