Chapter 129: Vanessa's Comments to Ava

Tuesday, April 26, 2005 (Continued)

Vanessa said, "Take a seat on the bed you three, because I'd like to make some brief comments to all of you, but mostly to Ava."

We did so, Julia putting Ava in the middle so we could put our arms around her.

"This exchange is based on the honor system. It requires trust, and without trust it is nothing. The three of you should strive to earn and retain the trusts of the others. The future is uncertain. Events may occur which make it extremely difficult for one or more of you to uphold your commitment. If that happens, honor requires that you do your best to abide by the spirit of the commitments. Your promises to each other are simple, and you don't need lawyers to tell you what you can or cannot do. Use your best judgment and your best intentions.

^-- "Lastly, and this is addressed to Ava only. Ava?"

"Yes?"

"You have committed everything that is you to Mark. Your body, your thoughts, your heart, even your hopes for the future. That would make Mark the ONLY purpose of your life. But to achieve what he has promised, Mark has to let you have back most of what you gave him. You would never grow into a happy adult if, for example, Mark did not let you have your own hopes for the future. You gave your life to Mark, and he has let you have most of it back, but Mark still has control over it, Ava. That's very important. He'll let you have your body most of the time, but if he wants it, it's his. If Mark told you to walk across the room and slap me in the face, you would."

Ava recoiled from that idea.

"Yes you would, Ava. If Mark ASKED you if you wanted to do it, you could tell him 'No.' But if he ORDERED you to, then you shouldn't even think about it. You should get up and do it. Mark has decided, and he's ordering his second body - which is you - to do what he wants. His own body's hand wouldn't refuse or argue with him, and you won't refuse or argue with him either. Do you understand that's how strong the commitment you've made is, Ava?"

"Yes." Pause. "I have to do everything he says."

"If Mark clearly orders it, yes. You have made a commitment. We all heard you, and everyone in this room takes commitments very seriously. If you break your commitment, we'd be extremely disappointed in you. We want to like you, but we'd like you a lot less if you broke your word. That includes Mark liking you a lot less. You don't want that, do you?"

"Oh no. I want Mark to love ... LIKE me a lot."

"It's perfectly all right for you to want Mark to love you. You love him, and we all know you want him to love you back. You should never hesitate to express your true feelings with any of us."

"Okay."

"Good girl. You'll get used to our openness. Back to Mark. Most of the time you'll treat each other normally. You'll tease him the way Julia does. You'll joke around, even argue lightheartedly. You'll be allowed to tell him you're busy or not in the mood when he asks you to do things. I'm sure you'll mostly do what he asks, because you'll want to, but that'll still be from your choice. But if he orders you, then you don't have any choice. The decision has been made and you have to do it. I know you understand that, but I'll give you an example. Have you ever spent time with a boy after your parents ordered you not to see him again?"

Ava hung her head, and quietly confessed, "Yes. I wish I hadn't now."

"I'm sure you'll be a very good daughter from now on, but my point is that if Mark orders you not to see a boy, then you'll absolutely obey him. You won't even think about disobeying him, no matter how wonderful you think the boy is. You will obey all of Mark's orders, even more than you obeyed your parents' orders. Do you know why Mark's orders are even stronger than those of your parents? I'll tell you right away that it's not because your parents are less important than Mark."

"Umm. No?"

"It's because you never gave your parents a commitment like you just gave Mark. You're old enough to make very adult decisions now, and you deliberately decided to give everything you have to Mark. You will obey Mark more than your parents because of the importance of that commitment. It's far, far more important than a marriage vow."

"Wow. I never realized that."

"It doesn't matter whether your realized it before or not. It's a done deal now, so you can't change it. That's two lessons about being an adult: you often can't take things back, and you have to take responsibility for your actions. Your commitment has been made, so all you can do is keep it or break it. I'm sure you'd be appalled if Mark and Julia tried to take back their promises to you. We'd ALL be appalled, and they'd be in a great deal of trouble with Prof and me. They can't take theirs back, and you can't take yours back. I'm sure you've seen Julia argue with Mark several times? Sometimes even push him around?"

"Yes. A lot. Julia does nearly all the talking."

"Mark lets her do that. In fact, he wants Julia to do that."

"He does! Why? I'd NEVER talk with Mark the way Julia does sometimes!"

"The reasons don't..."

Julia interrupted. "Sorry Mom. Ava, that was a 'why' question. You were questioning one of Mark's decisions."

"Oh, I was too. I'm very sorry, I didn't mean to..."

Julia interrupted again, "Don't worry about it. The important thing is to completely drop it now. Carry on Mom, as if nothing had happened."

Vanessa said, "Okay. I was saying Mark wants Julia to express her opinions, even if they disagree with his. That's one of the things Mark gave Julia back. Do you understand what I mean by that?"

"No."

"When Julia made her commitment to Mark, almost the same as the one you just made, he gave her back that part of herself."

Ava looked at Julia in amazement, "You've done this too?"

Julia could only nod because Vanessa kept speaking, "You don't think you're the only girl smart enough to want to make such a commitment to Mark, do you?"

"I'm not smart."

"Yes you are. You just gave your life to Mark. That was very smart."

"Oh. Wow. Oh."

Julia said, "We're sisters in more ways than you thought, Ava. Mark controls both of our lives."

"Wow. This is AMAZING! I never thought of that EITHER, {giggle}. I don't think I thought of hardly ANYTHING, haha."

Julia said, "Here's another surprise for you: There will be more sisters in the future too. More girls who commit themselves entirely to Mark."

"More?" questioned Ava, frowning at the thought.

Julia wasn't going to accept that frown. "Yes. Probably several more. I see you're not happy at that idea. How would you have liked it if I'd been unhappy at your joining me? Would you have liked it if I'd frowned and tried to keep Mark all to myself? Instead I opened my arms and welcomed you. I'm not selfish, and I know you're not either. You'd better not be, because you don't have any choice. I had no choice about your joining, and we both have no choice about any more girls. The decision is entirely Mark's. He's the boss, remember?

^-- "I AM glad you've joined me Ava. We will have fun together, I'm looking forward to helping you with your parents, and I'm looking forward to having your help when I am doing things for Mark. I'm also looking forward to having your help when I'm teasing my brothers and Mark, but that's just for our personal pleasure, haha. But our enjoyment is not the issue. If Mark decides to let another girl commit to him, then I'm not going to tell him he can't do it. Are you going to tell Mark he can't do something, Ava?"

"He REALLY is the boss, isn't he? The big boss. Not just of me, like I thought, but even more than me?"

"That's a good way of putting it, sweetie. Mark is the 'Big Boss', and he's going to get bigger too. Not because he eats so much, haha, but because more girls will come. I even think that there'll be one more girl quite soon. I don't think she'll be as committed as you and me; I think she'll just give her love to Mark, and Mark will accept it. Lots of girls say they love Mark, especially after they sleep with him, and he normally doesn't do anything about it, but I think he'll accept the new girl's. Even though she won't be as committed to Mark as we are, we will still accept her with open arms and do everything we can to make her happy. Even if we don't like her - which I'm sure won't be the case - but even if we don't, we will still try very, very hard to make her happy. Do you know why?"

"No. I don't even know who she is!"

"That doesn't matter. We will make her happy, whoever she is, because our real job is to make MARK happy. He wouldn't like it if she wasn't welcomed, so we will welcome her. I am welcoming you because Mark wants me to. The fact that I am VERY happy to have you join me is GREAT, but I'd welcome you anyway. My opinion doesn't matter once Mark decides something, just like your opinion doesn't matter. If Mark ordered either of us to go and slap my mom, we would do it, regardless of our opinions. If Mark lets another girl join him in some way - whether the same way as us, or a different way - then we do it, regardless of our opinions. Mark is the Big Boss about EVERYTHING to do with our lives."

"I never thought of that EITHER! I just thought I was giving myself to Mark and you."

"Yeah, I had the same surprise when I realized my life wasn't going to be just me and Mark together like a normal marriage. It's turned out surprisingly wonderful. You like that I'm your sister, don't you? That I'm going to help you when your parents get sicker, and help you become confident about living your own life successfully?"

"Oh yes! That's going to be super-fantastic for me. I know you're going to be a HUGE help. I can't imagine how bad it would be without you. I'd be..."

"Sorry to interrupt, but my point is that if you had Mark to yourself, like a normal couple, then I wouldn't be around to help you. Having me as an extra sister for you, makes your life a LOT better than it would be without me. Same for me. With you as an extra sister, you can help me, and that will make my life better. Having more sisters is GREAT! You frowned when I first mentioned it, but when Mark tells me he might add another girl, I say, 'Yippee!' More sisters means more girls who'll be able to help you when you need it, and it means more chances for you to do wonderful things to help them. There will be a LOT more love going around. I hope we end up with several girls, because that's going to be such an incredibly loving way to live our lives. Can you imagine living in a lovely house with several very loving friends."

"That's AMAZING! There could be LOTS of us. {Giggle}, Mark's going to be VERY busy!"

"Yeah, just as well he's so fit."

"I'll say! Oh, I just thought that we won't all fit in my parents' house; it's not big enough for too many people."

"Don't worry about that, there are many solutions. An easy one would be just to add a new room on one side - a new bedroom for Mark. A very big, new bedroom."

"Haha. It'll have to be VERY big. With a GREAT, BIG bed. Boy, there's going to be a LOT of sex!" By the look of the smile on Ava's face, this was a very welcome development.

"There certainly is!" Julia then suggested, "If there are lots and lots of girls, we could even buy the house next door and convert it into a HUGE dormitory. More sisters is good, but I hope Mark doesn't add that many too quickly. It'd take some getting used to."

"Umm, Julia. I don't think I'll have enough money to buy the house next door."

"We already said your money is your own. It's totally excluded from your commitment to Mark."

"I know that, but I'm the only one who'll have any. If you want to build a new room or buy the neighbors, someone has to pay for it."

"Sweetie, that's very generous of you, but we won't be touching your money. If we need money, we'll just ask Mark for it. He's the man of the house, and that's what men of the house are for. He can't just lie around all day having sex with all the girls; he's got to earn his keep! Haha."

"But it'll be YEARS before he earns enough money to do what we've been saying."

I knew a good way of answering Ava's concern, so I said, "Ava, how many years of practice does it normally take to be able to bowl 300 games? How much time training to win 10k races? Some things I can do VERY quickly. I'm sure that if we need some money, I should be able to get it. We don't want to touch your money, and we'll be fine without it."

"But you're still at school. And next year too. Even if you get a job right after graduation it's going to take..."

Prof interrupted, "Ava, as I understand things Mark is the boss. Correct?"

"Sure. Definitely! The Big Boss, with lots of girls, haha. Oh, I just realized we're talking about all that in front of your family. My parents would've hit the roof by now!"

Prof said, "It's fine with us, Ava. Julia never gave us a choice and we're used to it now, haha. My point about Mark being the boss is that it's the boss's job to make plans like where you live, how to pay for it, etc. It's Mark's responsibility, and he's already said he won't be using any of your money, so that's the end of that small part of it. Stop worrying about it, stop talking about it, stop thinking about it. Leave it to Mark."

Ava looked frustrated. We could all see her wondering if she could ask just 'one more question'.

Julia said, "Drop it, Ava. One of the consequences of having a boss is that sometimes he makes a decision while you still want to talk about it. You have to learn to accept his word. Mark has said it will be fine, and I'm sure it will be. Talking about it further just wastes his time and annoys him. That's far worse than simply not satisfying your curiosity about something which isn't even your responsibility. Got it?"

"Oh. Okay, I guess. It's hard to get used to."

"Don't look so depressed, sweetie. Mark and I are going to know you for years, and you've only just started learning about how to be with him, so don't worry. Think of it this way: I know you appreciate how intelligent Mark is, right?"

"I'll say. He's a genius!"

"He certainly is. Because he's so intelligent, he'll often make decisions far faster than we can. That's obvious. We certainly can't make him explain all his decisions to us, at our much slower, dumber thinking speeds - that'd add up to wasting YEARS of his life - so we simply have to learn to accept his decisions immediately."

"That makes sense. I knew anyway, but it's hard. I'll try to do that."

"I'll help you, sweetie. Every sister has to help every new sister."

Vanessa said, "I had a SMALL point I was going to make, before Julia hijacked the conversation. Julia made good points but I'll get back to my topic now. I said that Julia had made a similar commitment to Mark, and that Mark had given back her bossiness and argumentativeness. Mark's allowing Julia to behave that way because Julia is good at being bossy. Julia is good at managing people so she can help Mark by doing that for him. Just because Julia can argue with Mark, that doesn't mean you can, Ava. You'd be out of line and in trouble if you talked to Mark the way I know Julia does sometimes."

"Oh, I'd NEVER do that!"

"I'll tell you something that Mark's given back to you that he hasn't given back to Julia: your heart. Mark still controls Julia's heart, and probably always will. I doubt whether she'll ever fall in love with anyone else, but you're free to."

"Ahh, that's because Mark doesn't really want my heart. I'm not as good as Julia."

"That's not true Ava. Mark DOES want your heart. Mark has already accepted your love, and is letting you love him. I've seen him reject girls' love before. There was a girl here on Sunday clinging to Mark in the hot tub. What was her name, Julia?"

"Anna."

"Yes, that's right, Anna. She declared her love for Mark, but Mark didn't accept it. He has accepted yours, just like he's accepted Julia's. The difference is that he's given you back control of your heart. You can love Mark for as long as you want, and when you find another man, your love can go to him if you wish. That's under your control, not Mark's. But Julia's heart is not under her control. Mark and Julia know that the best thing for you is for you to have control of whom you love.

^-- "So there are at least two ways in which you two are different: Julia's bossiness, and your being able to choose who you love. There will be other differences, and any future girls will have other differences too. But there's one thing all of you girls should have in common: when Mark orders you to do something, you obey. I originally mentioned Julia's argumentativeness because I wanted to say that, as argumentative as Julia can be, if Mark told her he insisted on something, then Julia would instantly shut up and accept it. You must do the same thing, Ava. We've already told you that you must obey Mark. I don't want you to believe that just because Julia appears to be not very obedient, you don't have to be. Even though you may not see it, if Mark ordered Julia to do something, she would."

"I know that! Julia told me a funny story about her ... umm." Ava turned to Julia, to ask, "Can I mention, you know?"

Julia said, "I don't know?"

"Umm, stripping."

"Oh. You mean when I started stripping at school?" Ava nodded, and Julia summarized her story to her parents, "I told Ava that I'd misheard a comment Mark had made while we were walking in a corridor at school. I thought he'd told me to strip, so I started doing it. Ava knows I'm obedient to Mark."

#3: <Julia gets a lot of use out of that story. She didn't mishear us at all, she volunteered to strip to show us her obedience.>

#1: <Maybe we should make an honest woman of her by giving her the opportunity to do it for real? That'd serve her right for stretching the truth so often.>

#2: <As interesting as that idea is, we should probably listen to all this carefully.>

Vanessa said, "I've spent too long building the foundations then. I'll just give you the bottom line Ava: You must be obedient to Mark because there are things going on in his life that you know nothing about. They're very important and very unusual, so there's no way you could understand them. I have no idea how critical it might be the future, but it's entirely possible that people's lives could be dependent on your being immediately and totally obedient to Mark. That's actually a real possibility. When Mark orders you to do something, you MUST obey. Your, my daughter's, and Mark's life might depend on it."

#3: <Ahh, so THAT'S what this is all about. I thought Vanessa was being over the top about it. Julia too, come to that. But now it makes more sense.>

#2: <They think ahead, don't they? I thought it was mostly about sex, but it's got nothing to do with that at all.>

Ava said, "Really? Their lives? Wow." After a moments thought. "I WILL be very obedient, Vanessa. I've already promised that."

"So if Mark ordered you to fuck everyone on his soccer team, you'd do it?"

"Huh? Ahh..."

"Wrong answer, Ava!"

"But you didn't give me time to think. I'm..."

"Wrong answer again! When Mark gives you an order, you don't need to think. You IMMEDIATELY say 'Yes Mark!' The ONLY reason to ask questions would be if you didn't understand what he wanted you to do. I'll assume you know how to fuck, so the only possible answer was an immediate, 'Yes Mark'."

"Wow." Ava looked at me, and asked, "You wouldn't really order me to do that, would you?"

Vanessa answered for me, "I doubt it." Ava looked very relieved at that, until Vanessa added, "On the other hand, it would be a very good way of his testing that you really were loyal and obedient. Not to mention that all the guys on the team ARE his friends, so it would be a very good way for him to become popular with them."

"Oh."

"Maybe he could motivate his team to play better by giving you to the best player at the end of every match. The second best really, after him. More seriously, imagine if Mark wanted a guy to do an important favor for him, but that guy was reluctant. Then you walked past and Mark saw that the guy fancied you. Mark could offer you to the guy in return for the favor. Not only could he do that, I even hope that he does, or something like it."

A dazed, shocked Ava asked, "Really?"

"Mark needs to learn to give orders, to make good use of his resources - which include you - and even to make decisions which he finds difficult. It's only sex! In fifteen or thirty minutes it'll all the over and you can be very happy with yourself."

"Happy? How could I be happy?"

"Because you would've helped Mark. That should be VERY important to you now. Mark should be more important to you than you are. Your discomfort doesn't matter compared to being useful to Mark."

"Wow. I never thought of that EITHER! I wasn't thinking about sex stuff at all when I was thinking about being obedient to Mark."

#2: <So between the two of us, we covered all the bases, because that was about ALL that I was thinking about! Haha. How could she NOT think of sex?>

#3: <I don't know whether you have, but I've noticed that girls often don't think about obvious things. They go off on weird tangents that have got nothing to do with the topic at the time, or even reality.>

Vanessa said, "I want Mark to practice being commanding with my daughter. I am DISAPPOINTED that he is not. Of course I didn't want him to give Julia to his soccer team, but a much milder version of that wouldn't have upset me much. I understand that you've had several lovers before, and I see your attitude to sex is positive, so I don't see why you couldn't be useful to Mark in this way. After all, you did give him control of your body, so it's his choice to decide how to use it in ways that are useful for him."

I'd been occasionally glancing at The Boys during Vanessa's long discussion with us. They obviously had almost no clue about how far away from normality their parents' thinking had gone. By their reactions they obviously hadn't known Vanessa hoped for a mild version of my giving their little sister to a soccer team! The Boys were deliberately saying nothing, but it looked like Vanessa and Prof were going to be asked more than a few questions at the very first private opportunity.

Ava said, "I just never thought of doing those sorts of things for Mark. I was more thinking of things like doing his shopping for him. Normal things like that. Having sex with other guys is a BIG surprise! Umm, I guess I could though. Wait!, that's the wrong answer." Ava took a breath then proudly quoted Vanessa: "Yes Mark!" In a more normal tone, "Wow. I never thought I'd be agreeing to that. Umm, they'd wear rubbers, wouldn't they? I'm on the pill of course, but I still hope they'd wear rubbers?"

#1: <Wow. She actually agreed. That's incredible. This is definitely a "Good girl!" moment.>

#3: <Never mind that, as it's not as if we're really going to do it. Ava's on the PILL, so WE don't need to wear rubbers! Yippee. We'd better check with Julia first, but still, yippee.>

Vanessa adopted a more upbeat tone, saying, "There is no 'they', Ava. We're just talking hypothetically... , just talking about a made up example. I was deliberately trying to scare you because I want you to understand how big your commitment is, but reality won't be like that. I was very impressed by your 'Yes Mark!' That was wonderful. Mark and Julia are both very caring people, especially Mark, who cares too much. You can trust them both to care for and be nice to you. You'll have a joyful, wonderful time with them. They'll make you very happy, so you're a very lucky girl."

Ava recovered enough to look liked she believed it. I helped a little in my own, silly way, by giving Ava an extra hard hug and whispering, "I think Julia and I are the lucky girls." Ava giggled at that.

Vanessa raised her voice and adopted a solemn tone, making sure we took note of the following, "For better or worse, the three of you have got exactly what you wanted. Ava, what you wanted, and what you have done, is to put your life into Mark's and Julia's care. That will sometimes make you very happy and it will sometimes piss you off, just like it does with your real parents. You've chosen very good people, so I'm sure it'll work out even better than you expect. Julia you now have someone you can rely on to help you serve Mark in any way you want. I hope you make good use of her, and I deliberately intend both meanings of 'good'.

^-- "Last, but not least, Mark. Without your unique circumstances, I wouldn't have participated in - or allowed - any of this. The ordinary commitments of friendship would have been sufficient between the three of you. You are the root cause of tonight's activities - even though you weren't the, let me say, 'primary agitator' - so most of the responsibility for this is on you. Make sure this works well, and that everyone benefits.

^-- "You need to learn to be more assertive and to practice giving orders; including deciding what orders to give and in taking responsibility for them afterward. You're currently letting life wash over and push you in whatever directions it wants. By which, I really mean PEOPLE are too often pushing you in whatever directions THEY want. Making decisions for yourself, standing up for yourself, and giving orders to others, is how you get your life going in the direction that you - rather than others - want. For whatever reason, you won't command Julia, so Julia has 'washed' you into this direction. Hopefully you'll command Ava now. If not, then you've got an issue which will cause large problems in the near future.

^-- "Now that the three of you are much more partners in your relationship, rather than people to be 'managed' - Julia! - I suggest you sit down and have a session where each of you identifies what you particularly want out of this relationship, and what you're able to put into it. You will be able to help, and be helped, better after that discussion.

^-- "Julia, you made several mistakes getting to this point. 'Getting carried away' was just one of them. I want to discuss those with you some time in the next couple of days. Preferably before you make a bad mistake to match tonight's good mistake. Produce a list of all the errors you can identify, and we'll go through them together."

"Yes, Mom."

"I've said my piece. Does anyone have anything they want to add? Any comments or questions?"

Not me! Vanessa can scare the hell out of me when she gets going, so I was going to keep my head down and try to hide. The Boys were saving their questions. Prof was smiling happily (God knows how he could do that!), and Julia was looking chastised.

Ava, when no one else spoke, hesitantly advanced, "Umm, I didn't really understand most of what you just said. Sorry."

"That's perfectly okay, sweetie. It was addressed to your two lovers, and they understood it. You and I spent a long time talking before that, and you participated very well then. You've done exceptionally well tonight, especially considering how difficult and strange it must have been for you."

"I'll say! This has been the weirdest night of my life! We NEVER talk like this at home."

Vanessa smiled innocently, and inquired, "Doesn't your mother ever tell you to have sex with a soccer team?"

"Haha. Not likely! She would have blown her stack if she'd heard you talk like that."

"Not the football team either?"

"Haha. No, no teams. She thinks I have sex with too many guys already. She wants me to settle down, but I'm going to be getting a LOT more sex from now on, aren't I?"

Julia answered, "Only with Mark, Carol and me to start with Ava. Don't worry about the soccer team story Mom told you; that was to scare you into understanding how big your commitment is. Any more lovers will probably be girls. There will be plenty of them around, like Katelin later tonight, and you'll be here as often as you want, so you'll have lots of chances."

"So when Mom asks me if I'm having sex with my new boyfriend, can you explain all that to her please, Julia, haha. She told me it was time to stop sleeping around and to settle down. She's going to be shocked! Thank goodness we don't have to mention Carol and any others; it's going to be hard enough to explain that there are three of us."

Julia asked, "I understand the others are casual and can be left out, but why would we not need to explain Carol?"

"Umm. I LIKE Carol, and all that, but I was kind of thinking we'd just have to tell Mom and Dad about the three of us. I REALLY hope we'll rent a house, so they can see us together."

"Ava, sweetie, I love Carol and she loves me. If I live in a house with Mark, then Carol will come too. There will be four of us, at least."

"At least?" Now Ava was worried.

"Yes. I'm sorry Ava, but I forgot to mention that what I called 'sisters' - girls that join with Mark similar to the way you and I have - that includes Carol already. We might not have any more 'sisters', but if we do, some of them might prefer to live with us. I know Carol will, for certain. There might not be any more new ones, but Carol is already included. Almost certainly everyone in the house will be lovers together. They'll need to be lovers, because we'll all be sharing Mark and sleeping in his bed. It'd be very awkward if two of the girls wouldn't touch each other, or if one girl wouldn't touch any other girl."