Chapter 52: I'm so confused

What just happened?

After Chandra helped me with my shirt, she visually examined my wounds. "Just a few torn stitches. Lady Megan will be here shortly, My Lord. Please lie down." With that she retreated to a corner, folding my shirt and pressing it against her chest. She just watched me, presumably to make sure that I would be a good patient.

It must have been something that I said. But that didn't make sense. I was yelling at them, when both of them suddenly went from angry to something else. Or maybe it was just Megan that changed. But Chandra also acts like something happened.

I'm lost.

Megan came in carrying a large bowl of steaming water and a few rolled up towels. She glanced at Chandra, who just nodded back silently. Chandra waited for Megan to set the bowl next to me and sat beside it, before she left without a sound.

"Relax, Charles, I'll try to be gentle." With that she washed the area with the steaming towel and replaced my broken stitches.

"You're getting better at this, Megan. This time stings less than last time."

"I'd rather not do this again, Charles." She was sitting away from me with her raven hair profiling her face. I could only see a hint of her full lips and her strong nose past her soft hair. I wanted to reach out and stroke it, but didn't want to disturb the peace that she seemed to have.

"I'll do my best so that you don't have to, My Lady."

I didn't know what to say next. So I grasped for the next thing that came to mind. "Where is Grant? I haven't seen him lately."

"I sent him to my father. I was afraid what you would do to his garden if he really irritated you."

"I am sorry about the garden, I wasn't paying attention." It was true.

"You weren't paying attention?"

"No, I started irritated with the twit, but after I lost most of my irritation I was able to focus on individual leaves. I worked on my precision. I would cut the stem of one and then bisect the leaf on its way to the ground. I guess that I got a bit carried away." I shrugged, and she slapped my chest telling me not to move.

"Sorry."

She finished her repairs and used the steaming water and one of the clean towels to lightly dab at the dots of blood. "What are your plans after I get home?"

I thought I heard a bit of strain in her voice with that question. "I figured that your father would lavish great wealth upon me and I would live like a king." That was not the correct answer from the scalding look that I just received. "Honestly? I hadn't planned that far ahead. I figured that I would decide that later."

She went back to dabbing at the points of blood that were still forming on my stomach. "What reward would you like?"

You.

"I'd treasure whatever you give, Megan. I'd even treasure a simple thank you." I was sure that she caught my hesitation but didn't comment.

"My father is going to insist on giving you a reward."

"Why are you asking me about rewards? What are you really thinking, Megan?" She hadn't moved a muscle, she just continued staring at my chest. "Please look at me."

She turned her head and revealed a single tear marring her perfect cheek. I reached up to touch it and she flinched. "Talk to me please." I lowered my hand to her leg, just resting it there.

"I don't know what my father is going to make of you." Another tear followed the first.

"What do you mean?"

"You are a Wizard Lord. You have power, maybe too much, but no status or wealth."

"Explain that to me please? Remember, I'm not from around here." An icy fear welled in my stomach. I dreaded what she would say next.

"Charles, you have no lands, no alliances, no ships or mines."

Fuck.

"I see." I breathed out a long, slow, mournful sigh. "And your future husband must have those, mustn't he?" I tried not to be bitter. I really did.

She nodded. "Do you have a say, or is it just your father?" I wanted clarification, or an excuse to cause me more pain. I'm not sure which.

"I can only say no." My heart was being stabbed with something rather large and dull. Repeatedly.

At least she had some say. That made me feel a bit better, but not much.

"Would it help if I asked for a lavish estate?" At her continued silence I added, "I thought not."

I sat up slowly and wrapped my arms around her. She kept her hands on my chest not allowing me to get too close.

"Megan, I'm sorry that I hurt you. Please forgive me." At that her tears fell unrestrained and she let me pull her into me. I rested her head on my shoulder and wanted to go home for the first time since I came to this stupid world.

I let her cry herself out. My heart was shredded, my stomach was burning, and my head pounded from restraining my own tears. It was then that I knew, really knew, that there would be no 'us'. Once I returned her home, her father would marry her off as soon as he could. I would be seen as a threat to his plans, and any suitor would be measured against me and found wanting. For she loved me.

While it might be acceptable for a minor lord or lady to marry another over love, a princess cannot. She realized this before me. Which did not surprise me in the slightest. That was probably why she fled yesterday.

"Charles." Her tears stopped and she pushed away. Not with force, but with finality. "Let me go." She was asking for more than for me to stop holding her. She was asking for forever.

Whatever was left of my heart crumbled into dust.

"I will always be there for you, Megan. If you ever have need of me, just ask." I took a deep breath and summoned what was left of my courage. "Come, let me take you to your room, My Lady." We stood together, she was about to speak and couldn't. I kissed her on the forehead and led her to her room.