Chapter 12: Here we go, again

Jimmy, Friday Night

I drifted easily into sleep and found myself somewhere I had not been in months: hiding in a closet with a young girl. The scene was poised to play out as it always had but this time there were differences. Always in the past I had witnessed this particular dream, or nightmare rather, as a sort of silent movie. I could see, somehow even sense, things that were happening. I always knew when her father was coming down the hall for instance, even though I couldn't hear his footsteps. This time I heard the front door slam, heard the sudden intake of breath from the girl huddled next to me in the darkness, and heard the heavy tread of work boots as he came down the hall. As always he paused before the closet and just as you expected him to turn and leave, a hand shot into the darkness past the rack of clothes to land on a blonde-trussed head and jerk her into the open. I heard her cry out at the sudden pain, the loud sound of his fleshy hand slapping her face, the creak of the bedsprings as he flung her towards it. The quiet sobbing as she began to unbutton her dress.

"Please, Daddy, no..."

I realized suddenly what I was missing. His voice was the only sound I didn't hear. The scene played out in the usual fashion, with tears in her eyes she dropped to the floor and began her task, as his passion rose his patience ebbed until he began thrusting himself into her mouth, stopping only when she began to choke and wretch as his intrusions went too far. Finally he pulled himself away; the girl climbed up onto the bed and spread herself open for him, the pale white lips, still covered only in the fine down of youth, parting to reveal the pink perfection of her inner opening. Climbing onto the bed he knelt between her spread legs, spitting on his hand and wiping it around her opening several times before roughly stabbing first one and then two fingers into her. Eventually he crawled over her, took her thighs in his hands so she could not squirm away, and forced his way into her. Eyes squeezed shut and biting her lip she whimpered silently at the intrusion.

I was suddenly aware of a cold rage building inside me. I knew better than to trust myself alone in such circumstances, so I shoved it away into the little box I had created somewhere inside just for that purpose. Rebecca had long ago taught us the need to compartmentalize, to separate the emotion from the act and remain rational throughout. Had this been anything besides a memory my emotional turmoil would have long since began altering the environment to fit my mood. I would have to be very careful tonight.

"Oh, that is just sick," Allison's voice suddenly sounded next to me. "Is this the same girl you've been seeing all along?"

"What girl?" Another voice out of the darkness asked. Lizzy stepped forward from behind the veil of dresses and jackets. I wasn't sure when I had actually left the closet. I didn't remember ever leaving it before.

"You mean you can't see them?" I asked.

"See who?"

"Okay, that's a no." Allison said. "Jimmy, do we have to stay for the whole thing or can we go?"

Rather than answer I moved us to my office. We appeared just inside the door and Lizzy immediately started checking out the dècor.

"Wow! Nice place you have here." She stroked her hand over the back of one of the couches. "I love leather. My grandmother had an old leather couch where we would sit and she would read to me. We stayed with her for a whole year when I was five. My father was deployed overseas. I lost count of the times I fell asleep on that couch. Someday, when I have a home of my own, I'm going to have a whole room just like this with all leather furniture," she stopped and looked around at the book cases and other furnishings, "and a fireplace ... right there." She pointed and suddenly a fireplace grew out of the wall, shoving bookshelves apart as it made room for itself. Within moments everything had shifted and resettled and you would never know that it hadn't always been there. When it was finished she turned back and said, "I hope you don't mind, I just thought it would look nice."

"It does look nice," Allison said. "In fact it looks perfect. I never even realized that wall needed something, but seeing it there now it seems obvious. I don't know what your plans are but I think I see a bright future for you as an interior decorator."

"Interior designer, decorator still brings up visions of flamingly gay men prancing around the apartment houses in San Francisco singing show tunes. I haven't given it much thought actually. I'm still undecided on a major so I'm just going to be working on the basics this year and see where God leads me. So what was that place you were in and why were you getting so angry?"

"You really couldn't see any of what was happening?" I asked, "Could you hear anything?"

"No, I was just suddenly in this closet and you were looking so pissed I thought it would be safer to stay there. What happened?"

"It's a recurring nightmare," I answered. "Not mine, but one I started seeing last year. There's this little girl hiding in a closet from her dad or step-dad or something. He comes home, drags her out of the closet, and forces her to have sex with him." I glanced at Allison. "This time it was a lot more detailed than it's ever been. I could hear almost everything that was going on. Before tonight it had just played out like a silent movie. This time I heard everything but him."

"Everything but him?" Allison asked.

"Yeah, that seemed weird to me too. I could hear everything else, even his footsteps. I'm pretty sure he was talking but I never heard any of it."

"I guess that explains why you were mad. I don't imagine you enjoy watching someone abused against their will."

I thought it was odd that she phrased it quite that way, but I let it pass. "You could put it that way."

"I have a question," Allison said. "Did you see him push his anger away?"

"Actually I did. It was really weird, though."

"Weird how?"

"Well, normally when I see someone compartmentalize anger it's like watching someone crumple up aluminum foil before throwing it away; It just gets smaller and more compact and then they sort of move it somewhere and it fades away on its own. Or like opening a curtain where you just sort of peel it back and let something else come through the window and wash it away." She looked back at me. "Yours was different, more like once you started pushing it, it just got sucked away somewhere."

"You mean like it was just suddenly gone? Not compacted and stored but just ... sent, or taken away," Allison said.

"Yes. It was very strange, why do you ask?"

"It's just something I've been thinking about. So, I'm guessing you two need to be alone for a while so you can get caught up."

Elizabeth gave her a half hearted smile. "Yeah, actually we do. Not really alone, we'll probably need Bob too. Do you mind?"

I think she was a little bit startled when Alison stepped in, kissed her on the cheek, and said, "Don't be silly, of course I don't mind. It's important or you wouldn't ask." Then she turned to me. "I think I want to go visit Sam. Can you arrange it and maybe send Shannon when she gets here."

"I could but it wouldn't work. Remember, if she sees you but not me..."

"Oh, right. Shoot. Can you take me real quick and then send Sha' after me?"

"Send me where?" Shannon's voice came from the doorway.

"Well," I said, clapping my hands together, "that takes care of that problem. Make yourself at home, Lizzy. I'll be right back." I took Allison's hand and headed for the door, picking up Shannon on the way and then we all three stepped though the door and into the hallway outside Samantha's bedroom door. I knocked gently and within seconds the door opened to reveal Samantha, wearing only her panties. Without even looking to see who it was, she stepped back and knelt with her eyes on the floor.

I stepped inside and reached down to lift her chin. As soon as I touched her the bracelet I had given her changed and she practically jumped into my arms. The girls rushed in behind me for a big group hug. I gave Samantha quick kiss and said, "I can't stay, but Alice wanted to come spend some time with you. Are you going to stay here or go somewhere else? Maybe a park or the beach or someplace you can relax a little?"

"I don't know," she answered tentatively. "It would be nice to be somewhere else, but..."

Shannon stepped up to whisper in my ear, "Adjust one of her charms to be a temporary key and send us all to Allison's glade, or better yet, yours so we all have control."

I pulled back and kissed her. "You are just so smart." I moved us all to the glade, dressing them all in jeans, tank tops, and boots along the way.

"It is so cool that you can do that," Samantha said.

"Yeah," Allison responded. "But maybe shorts and sandals would have been better."

I gave her a wink and then let out a piercing whistle. The girls kind of winced at the sound but within seconds hoof beats could be heard approaching and then three horses came cantering over the hill towards us. "Gotta run. You ladies have fun and I'll be back to see you when I'm free." I snapped my fingers and I was back in the office where I found Lizzy stretched out on one of the long couches with her head pillowed on her hands and a look of blissful contentment on her face. "Enjoying yourself?" I asked.

"Absolutely, but ... we are here to work, so, how are you coming with your research?"

"Far enough that I understand why I couldn't talk to anyone about it."

The look she gave me said she was impressed. "Very good, but are you convinced that I'm right yet?"

"Well, no, but..."

"No buts. You need to accept this completely or you won't be able to trust what comes later. Do you trust me?"

"Sure, even if I didn't I could stop you anytime you did something I didn't agree with, but yeah, I trust you."

"Good, because I need to be you, and you need to be invisible. Can you do that?"

"No problem."

"Good, and can you stay out of sight until I tell you, no matter what happens?" I must have hesitated too long because she took my hand and said, "Jimmy, this is important. It's probably the most important thing you've done since you rescued Angela. I have to know I can trust you to do this. Promise me that once we start you will do as I ask no matter what? Can you do that? If not then I need to talk to Bob and he needs to tell you that it's that important. I was hoping we could skip that step, but if you need to hear it from him, then call him."

As she was talking I made my decision. "No, I'll do it. Whatever you say, I promise not to interfere."

She took my hand and kissed it "Thank you, Jimmy. I know that I'm asking a lot but when we're done you will know it was necessary. Now, take us to that beautiful little lagoon of yours."

The scene shifted, carpeting and bookshelves were suddenly replaced by sand and clear blue sky. A short ways away the crystal blue water lapped gently at the shore.

"This is such a beautiful place ... Oh well, work. Now, how do you normally bring Amber here?"

"Nothing special really. It sort of depends on the mood and what is going on. Last time I dropped her on the water slide but that didn't work out so well."

"Why not?"

"Well, she was a little freaked out at first, then she realized what was happening and she was okay by the time she got to the bottom and found us all waiting for her. Unfortunately, a few minutes later, she was stopped in the middle of one of the slides with Allison doing her best to comfort her."

"What happened?"

"I don't know, one minute we're fine. It almost felt like she was about to kiss me, the next thing I know she goes all paranoid on me, like she's afraid to touch me."

"Right before things went south, did she seem okay to you or out of sorts?"

"She was okay at first, but then she would sort of stiffen up when I touched her, then she was okay again. It's really frustrating, but I'm trying to be patient. I figured she just wasn't comfortable being touched by a guy yet."

"That's a reasonable explanation but I think it's something else. Tell me; after you saved her, did she ever express a desire to maybe ... thank you on a more personal level?"