Chapter 18

Jessica left under protest. I would have gladly gone with her, but I foolishly asked the question.

Looking over to Jeanie, Theresa said, "You remember Tim? He acted very nice, didn't he?"

Jeanie was nodding before the words came out. "Yes, he did."

"That was before Jessica. He was wonderful, until that point."

"What happened, dear?" my mother asked.

"I got fat."

Theresa noticed me looking at her.

"Ok. I was pregnant."

I was still looking at her and said, "You probably looked good, pregnant."

She shook her head. "Tim didn't think so. He called me..." then she whispered it, as though she was embarrassed to even say it out loud, "a whale."

"That's disgusting," I said.

Theresa looked at my mom and asked, "Why does he keep saying these things?"

"That's the way he was raised. It is disgusting to say that to your wife."

I looked at Jeanie and asked, "It's why you told Jessica to be careful when you two came to see me in the hospital, isn't it?" Then I turned to Theresa and said, "It's why you've said 'hell' when I've said something nice, when you didn't expect it."

My mother broke into the conversation with, "Theresa, did you know ... Tim's parents?"

Theresa didn't respond right away. Each one of us looked at her and saw the tears starting to run down her cheeks. Jeanie grabbed a box of Kleenex and pulled a tissue out, handing one to her sister.

"I knew his father," Theresa started. "He was a nice enough guy, but..."

Jeanie took over, saying, "Tim's mother left before Tim was two. There was never any talk about it, but you could tell his dad had soured on women."

The two sisters looked at each other. It looked like Theresa had just lost a friend.

Theresa said in a sorrowful voice, "I've been poisoning my daughter, the same way Tim's dad did him."

Theresa started to slump in her chair. That was until she heard Jessica.

It made Theresa jump when Jessica said, "No you haven't, Mom."

"How long have you been listening?" Jeanie asked.

"I was told to go into my room, not to stop listening," Jessica said to her Aunt as she walked up to her mother. Getting down on her knees, Jessica gave her mother a big hug.

"Mom, stop worrying. I understand why you are mad at Dad. I wonder if Dad ever knew why his father was so down on women. You said his mother was never talked about, and it happened before he could probably remember much. I, on the other hand, remember a lot of what happened."

"But, Baby, I shouldn't have..." Theresa started.

"Mom," Jessica said and rolled her eyes, "let me ask you something."

"What do you want to know?" Theresa asked.

"Are you happy?" Jessica asked.

"Why are you asking me a question like that?"

"Do you think I'm happy?"

"Jess."

"Well? I'm not talking this last day, I mean in general. Am I a happy person?"

"Yes, you always have been. What are you trying to get at?"

"What would make you happy, Mom?"

"That's not a fair question."

"And the questions Jessica and I have been asked? They have been?" I wanted to know.

Theresa glared at me.

Jeanie said, "Of course not." Then she smiled and went on, "But they didn't need to be."

"Oh! Now that makes sense," I responded sarcastically.

The phone rang. It was Jeanie's husband. She looked at the time and realized how late it was. When she hung up, we knew she needed to leave.

My father said, "Theresa, your daughter asked you a question that I bet is hard for you to answer. I can't help with that one. It is a bit out of my league. I would venture to guess that it is an important question for you to answer. Not as much for your daughter's sake, but for your own."