Chapter 5

I got over to Billy's a little before seven the next morning. It was cold and sprinkling, but all the weather reports were forecasting a big storm coming through later in the day. There was going to be some snow, maybe even quite a few inches of it.

When I got up to get dressed and come over to check on Billy, Ellen told me to try to talk Billy into coming over to spend a few days with us. I knew that probably wasn't going to happen. Billy liked sleeping in his own bed at night. I told Ellen not to hold her breath while she was waiting for Billy to accept our invitation.

"I called Margaret last night. She said that she and Diane are free to come over for dinner Thursday night. I told her Billy would probably be here too. Tell Billy that when you invite him."

"If I tell him that, he'll just tell me that he'll drive over Thursday for dinner."

"Tell him he isn't invited on Thursday, but it would be different if he were already our houseguest."

"I'm not going to horse him around like that. Billy's always welcome to come to my house for supper."

"I knew you'd be like that, Jackie. You ask me for my help, and then, when I try to give it, you insist on doing things your own way. I told Margaret I'd call her back when I knew for sure if Thursday would be a good day or not. If you want to do it your own way with Billy, you can just figure out how to get Margaret and Diane together with Billy on your own."

"I wasn't worried about getting them together. That was you and Billy. Hell, to be honest, I'd prefer to keep Billy away from both of them. I've got a bad feeling about this. You don't know everything that might happen if Margaret and Billy were to take up where they left off over fifty years ago."

"Just remember what I said, dear. Tell Billy he has to come over here and spend a few nights, if he wants me to invite Margaret and Diane to dinner."

I knew she was sending me a message too. Ellen has always been like that. You ask her for an opinion about something, and the next thing you know, she's out in front, trying to take over everything. I hope she didn't think it was any news to me that people had to pay her asking price in order to get her cooperation. Fortunately for me, I didn't really want Billy and Margaret to get together again. I could afford to not jump through any of her hoops.

Billy already had a pot of fresh coffee on the stove. Ellen and I used one of those electric Mr. Coffee things, but Billy cooked his up on the stove top burner. He still added some egg shells to his coffee grounds, just like my parents, and his, used to add them to theirs. I had no idea why they had ever done that, but the coffee tasted fine. I guess some habits are hard to break.

"Ellen wants you to come over to our house and stay for a few nights. She's worried about you getting enough good food to eat."

"I need to stay here. I don't need any fancy food to get by on. I like a good breakfast in the morning, which I'm perfectly capable of making myself, and then I just heat up some of that frozen stuff you can buy over at the market. Put it in the oven for thirty five minutes, and its ready to eat. Tastes good, and its easy to clean up after yourself too."

"Ellen has gotten in touch with Margaret and Diane. I think she mentioned something about maybe inviting them over for supper one of the nights when you're visiting."

"Really? Isn't that something? Did you find out why they came to Theresa's funeral?"

"They go to most of the funerals for people they knew. They went to your mom's funeral. They went to my mother's, and to my father's too. They apparently go to quite a few funerals. Margaret said she went to Herbert Martin's funeral. She even went to Frank Tierney's funeral."

"Frank died? When? I don't remember anyone telling me he was even sick."

"He got run over by one of those Arco tanker trucks up in Boston, a few years back. He got dragged underneath for a long ways after too. Margaret said he was in the hospital for a few weeks before he died. Not a way I'd pick for myself to kick the bucket."

"I bet somebody made some nice money in a lawsuit after that though. Getting run over by a tanker truck from a big oil company like that, somebody must have gotten a nice settlement. Only thing better would be if you got run over by one of them Kennedy's when they were all liquored up. Be even better if they did one of those hit and run things, but somebody went and got their license number."

"Boston jury might not give that big of an award against one of the Kennedy's though. Arco is probably better."

"Did you ask Margaret if she wanted to see me?"

"No. She did say she was sorry for what happened to Teri, and that she felt real bad about the way she always had treated her though. Said to tell you she was sorry for a lot of the things she did back when she was a kid."

"She looks good though, don't you think?"

"She looks good for a seventy year old woman, but she doesn't look like any fifty five year old to me."

"She isn't seventy, damn it. We're both in our sixties."

"Sorry, Billy. I forgot you still have a few months to go before you hit seventy. Last time I checked though, Margaret was the same age as you. Compared to you though, she does look somewhat younger."

"Why didn't you ask her when you had the chance? I told you I was wondering."

"I'm trying to stay all the way out of this one, Billy. Ellen said she'd set up a dinner party for when you come over to stay at our place for a few nights."

"Don't need to spend any nights just to get some supper. Tell her to set it up and let me know which night it is. I'll be there."

"Phone is right over there, and I'm sure you still remember our number? Call her yourself. I said I'm not going to be a party to any of this. You and Ellen are the ones that seem hell bent on doing this. I'll just stand on the sidelines and watch to see how it all turns out for you."

Billy groused a lot about what I said, but I also noticed he wasn't reaching for the telephone to call Ellen. He and I played a few games of cribbage to pass the time. Right before lunch, we went out in the rain and helped one of his neighbors load up a couple of cords of wood Billy had set aside for him. Poor guy was out of firewood, and couldn't wait for better weather to come over to load it up.

Billy said he worked over at the casino, and that both he and his wife had an addiction to the slot machines. I noticed the man telling Billy that he'd be over to pay him for the wood real soon. Billy told him it didn't matter too much, and just to pay him when he had it to spare.

"I see you're turning into one of them philanthropists now, Billy. I guess you can afford it though."

"Don't you worry none about Eddie. He'll be over here in a week, two at the outside, with my money. His father was the same way, except with him it was whiskey instead of gambling. Whiskey killed his dad. I don't suppose the gambling is as dangerous for Eddie as the hootch was for his father."

"I wanted to let you know that I have plenty of extra dough in case Little Billy puts you on too tight of a budget." Billy just laughed, and shook his head from side to side.

"I think I've got enough on my own to last me. The kids might think they have everything, but they don't, not by a long ways. I made up my own trust about two years after Theresa used me for target practice that time. Just in case. A lot of the time it was just easier to put a little land deal together using my own money. If my mother needed anything, because she didn't always get along with Theresa, she'd come to me, and I'd take care of it, without the need for Theresa to be getting all worked up about it. Comes in handy, having your own source of money."

"I figured you might have something like that, but I just wanted to make sure, in case you didn't."

"Tell me about this problem that Ellen talked to Theresa about. Your pecker just up and quit working?"

That's always the problem with women telling things to other women. No woman will ever keep a man's secrets. They'll keep their own, but never a man's.

"It isn't so much. One of my valves must have sprung a leak or something. It still works, it just can't hold the blood where you need it for too long."

"Those little blue pills don't work for you?"

"I haven't ever tried them. Like I said, I think I need to get a new seal put in or something. It still works, but its getting to be more trouble than its worth."

"Bull shit Jackie. It was all that smoking you used to do. Clogs up them arteries, and it clogs up those little veins that feed blood into your dick too."

"Are you confessing that it got you too? I seem to remember that the first Camel I ever smoked was one I borrowed from you. Refresh my memory again, Billy, who was it that asked me for all my leftover cigarettes, back when I quit to try to get back into shape again?"

"That would be me, Jackie. Cigarettes don't have the same effect on people who actually get outdoors and do a little honest work once in a while. I already told you that everything I have still works. The only thing I've ever had a problem with was my teeth."

"You're telling me you don't have any problems with getting it up and keeping it up, right?"

"None at all. If anything, my problem is getting it to ever go down again. It can get damn embarrassing too."

"You know what? I think you're full of shit. If it does work, I'd be willing to bet big bucks that it only works when you take a bunch of those damn E. D. pills."

"I never said I didn't. Not a bunch though, just one. Not all the time either, just when I'm feeling a little bit sluggish. A man my age isn't afraid to take advantage of a medical breakthrough. I own a bunch of stock in Pfizer's anyway. Part of what I spend comes right back to me in dividends. Medicare, and my part B coverage pays most of it for me anyway. Of course, when I was only your age, I didn't need to take anything. This is only recently that I've even looked into Viagra. You should try it. Can't hurt."

"I thought you said Teri couldn't, because it hurt her too much?"

"Jackie, there are some things a man needs to keep private. You're stepping way over the line here. Let's drop it, okay?"

"Fuck you, Billy. This is exactly why I didn't want to let myself get involved in this thing of yours with Margaret. I just knew it was going to get you started up again with being the same way you used to be. I don't want to go back to how it was then. If you want to let your dick start leading you around again, you can do it all by yourself."

"What is this you're going on about? I never let my pecker do my thinking for me, never. Margaret has nothing to do with this anyway. You're just jealous that I'm older than you, and I still have my keen interest in women."

"Have it your way, Billy. I still don't want any part of helping the two of you get together. Not now, so soon after Teri and all."

I kept him company for another hour, helping him separate some of Teri's things for the Goodwill, and some for the trash bin. I could tell Billy was bothered by having to take care of something like that. After about an hour of it, he just left off what we were doing and grabbed his coat and went out for a short walk by himself.

I kept working for about another thirty minutes, until he came back inside. I could tell it was really cold out, some of the wetness from his crying was starting to harden on his rosy red cheeks. As soon as he came back inside he poured himself a big slug of Four Roses. I had a small one myself, just to keep him company.

"You better hit the road. The snow is going to start sticking soon. Tell Ellen I'm free almost any night for supper."

"I'll have her call over here. You can tell her that yourself. I'm glad you have your own dough, Billy. I don't think the kids are going to be happy if you follow through with this."

"Jackie, I have kids, grand kids, and in a few months, I'll have a great grand kid. I've put in my damn time. I have a right to live some kind of a life for myself now. If any of them don't like it, that's just too bad. Same goes for you. I don't go around looking at everything you do, or offer to give you any of my advice. I already knew you didn't like Margaret. It doesn't matter. I'm not interested in her for you, I'm interested in her for me. What difference could any of this possibly make to Theresa? You think she knows or cares what happens to me now?"