Chapter 40: Stronger than you know

Tara Jacks absolutely refused to consider any option other than keeping her baby.

By Christmastime she was starting to show, and she took to wearing baggier tops and sweatshirts. The spotlight on her at school was intense, but she was strong, stronger than anybody realized. She stood up to the pressure with her head up, willing to meet anybody's gaze straight on. Whispered conversations followed her everywhere in school, but she acted like she didn't care at all.

It was all a lie, of course. Jaimie told us in confidence that Tara would come home and run up to her room every afternoon in tears. Jaimie did what she could for her, comforted her the best she could. Tara had a huge burden to bear, however, and most of the weight she carried alone.

Mr. and Mrs. Jacks had finally come to terms with their impending grandparenthood, and reluctantly accepted Tara's unequivocal decision. After the holidays were over, they began fixing up their dining room for the baby, setting up a crib, a cradle, and a changing table. Their dining room set was temporarily exiled to the basement.

Tara had two other friends who stepped up for her, and she ended up relying on their support more and more as the winter wore on. One was Tracy Evanson, who seemed to have taken to heart her brother's criticism on her behalf. She also took away some wisdom from the harsh lesson that Tara was living. Tracy sat with Tara at one of the long tables in the cafeteria at lunchtime, willing to be ostracized from any of the "cooler" groups of kids by hanging out with the pregnant girl. She spent as much time each weekend at the Jacks house as her parents would allow, too, helping Tara with homework, providing friendship to a girl who was sorely in need. On the occasional mornings Tara was too sick to come to school, Tracy picked up her homework assignments for her, and made sure she got them that afternoon.

Tara's other loyal friend was my brother, Stephen.

My parents nearly hit the roof when they found out Stephen was one of the suspected fathers. They cried, they wailed, they gnashed their teeth, they grounded him until his twenty-first birthday. They calmed down a little when Stephen finally told them Tara had already been pregnant when he had been with her in her room at the end of summer. Tara had told him that she didn't think he was the father of her baby, but he still shouldered some of the responsibility. He knew his actions had been less than honorable, and his upbringing, despite occasional setbacks, would not let him duck out of what he considered to be his duty to Tara.

Michael and I acted as mediators between Stephen and our parents, until all the angry words and hurtful accusations were behind us, and some meaningful discussions could take place. Stephen insisted on helping Tara as much as he could, and it was eventually agreed that he could go over to the Jacks house, under supervision. Tara's parents had to be there, no exceptions.

Stephen helped Mr. Jacks repaint the dining room and set up the crib. He and Tara did homework together, sitting at the kitchen table while Mrs. Jacks or Jaimie prepared dinner, and Tracy came over to be with them when she could. Stephen goofed off with Tara, told corny jokes, and helped to remind her that it could be fun to be a kid. Tara was learning one of life's harder lessons as she trod the path toward her own parenthood at the age of fourteen, but she wasn't alone. Her two friends, her parents, her sister, and her sister's friends did what they could to ease her way.

By our school's Spring Break, the last week of March, Tara had gained nearly thirty pounds. For a girl who stood just a little over five feet tall, and who probably only weighed around one hundred pounds normally, it was a huge change. She lumbered around, seeming to take up even more room than her expanded hips and tummy demanded. Stephen would massage Tara's feet and calves almost every evening, trying to bring a small dose of comfort to her complaining muscles and joints, doing what he could to make her feel better, physically and emotionally.

Tara didn't return to school after our break. By the first week of April, she was eight months pregnant, uncomfortable in her body and uncomfortable enduring the continuing stares in the hallways. Stephen wanted to stay with her at home until she delivered, but both sets of parents vetoed that idea. He reluctantly went back to classes with the rest of us.

In the weeks after we had won our second consecutive state championship, my teammates and I were treated like royalty at school and in town. Pick Cropper called to congratulate us, and I talked to Jesse Wilhoit several times. He had first called when he learned of the AHSSA All-American honors, and we talked every couple of weeks or so. Jesse and his sister, Anna, came up and spent an evening with Kayla and me when he was home for Christmas break, and we made plans to get together during the summer, so he could let me know what to expect when I got to Florida.

Jesse was going to try out for the Under-Twenty National Team in the spring. I was planning on running my summer clinics again after I graduated. I knew, from the response I had gotten the previous summer, I could fill three or four age groups without a problem. Eric, Jorge, and Tessa had already agreed to help me out, and Trent was also planning on being home most of the summer to work with me. I thought I would also be able to get a couple of other kids, both guys and girls from the school teams, to assist. I was excited about the prospect of going off to Florida to play soccer and go to school, but I really couldn't think in real terms beyond getting through my senior year of high school, and planning for the summer.

By the tail end of winter, almost all of us were looking forward to Spring Break and not having to think about school for over a week. The weather still was not very consistent, but at least we could spend some time outside. Kayla and I picked up our mileage on our runs. The soccer season, followed immediately by winter, had forced us to cut down on the frequency we were able to get out. The weather also curtailed our distances, since we didn't feel much like running far when it was so cold out.

We also managed to find a couple of opportunities to make love, but we were beginning to feel a little inhibited with each other. We tried talking about it, but we were both uncomfortable even addressing the problem. We each tied it, at least in our own minds, to Tara's pregnancy, and to Stephen's continuing involvement.

For the Junior/Senior Prom, our plans were a little disjointed. I had once again made reservations for ten couples at Delmonico's in Monticello for dinner before the dance. Alex and Molly drove down with us on a double date. When we got to the restaurant, Josh and Andrea, along with Tiny and Erica, were already there. Eric and Keisha, doubling with Anthony and Ayesha, came in right behind us. Austin and Tessa were driving down with Jorge and Marissa, and they came in a few minutes later. The busboy was just filling our water glasses when Toby and Ashley came in.

"Where's Jake and Jaimie?" I asked. They were supposed to be with Toby.

Toby shrugged. "Jake called about a half an hour before he was supposed to pick us up," he said. "Something came up, said they'd be late."

"I wonder if it has something to do with Tara," murmured Kayla.

We carried on without them, and we ordered our dinners. There were a couple of other prom tables scattered through the large dining room, so we cruised back and forth between courses, visiting with friends and classmates. We got some sour looks from some of the other patrons and families who had chosen this unfortunate evening to go out for a nice Italian dinner, but our mood was jovial and exuberant, and attitudes from fogies weren't going to bother us at all.

After dinner, the restaurant pretty much emptied out as all the prom parties headed out, packing into cars for the drive downtown to the dance.

We got to the ballroom in the hotel fashionably late, and we joined the rest of our schoolmates on the dance floor. I even managed to coax Mrs. Neville out to shake her booty a time or two. Coach absolutely refused to be persuaded, even by somebody as irresistible as my Luscious, to join us. Personally, I didn't see how he could refuse the prettiest girl in school, but he managed, contenting himself to watching his wife and me gyrate to the music.

In the middle of dancing to Billy Idol's Hot in the City, there was a small commotion as a big body came swarming through the dancers. Kayla and I stopped and watched as Jake, pulling Jaimie along by the hand, came bullying his way through the crowd. He stuck out his hand, clutching a bunch of chocolate cigars.

"Congratulations, Porter! We're uncles!"

"What?" I asked.

Jaimie was practically jumping up and down. She was so excited, she was nearly bouncing out of her low-cut dress. "Tara had her baby!" she cried. "It's a boy!"

Kayla squealed, and leapt up into Jaimie's arms. "How wonderful!" They squeezed each other tightly, sharing the news as best friends should. Kayla dabbed at her eyes, wiping away small tears of joy, once she let go of Jaimie.

"Well, maybe we're step-uncles or something," I said.

"Yeah, whatever," said Jake, obviously enjoying the moment. He handed cigars to Tiny and Eric, who happened to be near us when Jake came barging in. "Anyway, that's why we missed dinner, because Jaimie's folks were taking Tara to the hospital."

"And I didn't want to miss it, even for Prom," said Jaimie.

"Right," agreed Jake. "So there I was, half-dressed already when Jaimie called."

"Which half was dressed?" asked Eric with a smile.

Jake grimaced. "You probably don't want to know," he said. "Anyway, so I hurried, and Jaimie and I stopped at your house on the way, but you guys had already left, so I picked up Stephen, and he went with us to the hospital."

"Really? Stephen was there, too?" I guess the news didn't really surprise me all that much.

Jake looked at me kind of funny. "Of course he was," he said.

"It turns out that Tara had been in labor most of the day, but didn't tell anybody," continued Jaimie. "She thought it was false labor or something, she said. "I think she just was in a little bit of denial, personally."

"So by the time we got there, she was already in the delivery room with her mother." Jake picked up the story. "We were only there a few minutes when Tara asked if Stephen could come in and be with her."

"Really?" That surprised me. I thought Stephen would be too squeamish to want to be in there. I certainly would have been, especially at his age.

"Of course she did," said Kayla, giving me a look that said I was being dense again.

"Okay," I said doubtfully. Why did everybody else know more about my brother than I did?

"So we stayed there until Mom came out and made the announcement," continued Jaimie. "A boy, eight pounds ten ounces, Kyle Allen Jacks, born at 7:39 PM on May 13, 1983." She stopped, her eyes bright.

"Oh my God, I'm an aunt," she whispered, almost to herself. "My little sister's a mom."

Much later that night, Kayla and I were in one of the quiet rooms at the YMCA, during the all-night post-Prom lockdown, sharing a Coke.

"You know, when we start having children, you're going to have to be in the delivery room with me, too," she said. There was a glint of humor in her eye.

"Yeah, I know," I said a little defensively. "I was just a little surprised about Stephen, that's all ... I mean, it's not even his kid."

"Maybe it's not his kid," corrected Kayla.

"Okay, maybe," I conceded. "Tara didn't think it was his."

"But Stephen thinks it is," she pointed out. "And Tara's just not sure. She's willing to take the love and support that Stephen is offering, though."

"So maybe I really am an uncle," I said in surprise.

She smiled at me. "Maybe you are," she agreed.

We went off in search of entertainment, and found Eric and Keisha in the hallway, looking a little furtive.

Eric smiled. "Come with us," he said, motioning for us to follow them.

He led us confidently past the locker room doors, and through another, unmarked door. We came to three closed doors on our right, and Eric reached into his pocket and pulled out a ring of keys. He smiled, and selected one key off the ring. He looked up at us as he slid the key into the lock.

"Good to have friends in high places," he murmured. He gestured us into the room, and closed the door behind us, leaving Luscious and me alone in one of the massage rooms. There was a low massage table in the middle of the room, and a lounging couch along one wall. A stereo was on a shelf above the couch, and on the other side of the room was a locked cabinet.

I looked at Kayla. "It's good to have friends who have friends in high places," I said.

She smiled, and reached up and switched the stereo on. Soft, relaxing music came out of the speakers mounted in the corners of the room.

"Would you like a massage?" I asked, indicating the table.

"I don't know," she said. "I've never had one."

"Well, then, you're in for a treat, ma'am," I said. There was a stack of towels on a rack next to the cabinet. I took one and handed it to her.

"Here you go, miss," I said, trying to be all business. "Kindly remove your garments, and lie down on the table, face down, and cover yourself with the towel."

She smiled at me, and pulled her sleeveless shirt off over her head as I busied myself with putting another towel down for her on the table. I kept my eyes averted as she took off her jeans and underwear, and boosted herself up onto the table. She put the towel across her like a blanket.

"Are you ready, miss?" I asked.

Her voice was muffled. There was a padded hole in the table, and she had her face resting in it. "Yes, but aren't you a little overdressed?"

"Ah, the madam would like to experience our patented Naked Massage, I see," I said in my most proper tone. "That can be arranged."

I stripped off my t-shirt as I wedged my shoes off. I sat on the couch for just a moment so I could yank off my socks, and then I stood and shucked off my jeans and underwear. Kayla had her head turned on the table, watching me the whole time.