Chapter 73: So Close and Yet so Far

"You don't understand; I had her, it was just for a second but I'd swear I felt her."

I had tried to get back to sleep after my alarm went off but the adrenaline rush it had generated wouldn't allow it. Eventually I had given up and gone for my morning warm-up run. I was talking to Mom and Allison before getting in the shower.

"I do understand that," Mom said. "And I understand that you're upset that you woke up and couldn't try to actually, what do you call it? Bridge her. But beating yourself up over it isn't going to help. You need to be thinking about what this means."

"What?" I asked, shaking my head, "I don't know what you mean."

She shook her head and answered, "I don't know what I mean. Looking for a reason I guess. I don't know how all this works, how any of it works. Why would you not be able to reach her at night for two days but suddenly this morning she shows up?"

Allison gave her head one of those funny twists as she thought about it, and then said, "Maybe she hasn't been asleep."

"What?" I asked.

"Maybe the whole reason you haven't been able to reach her is just so obvious we never even thought of it. Maybe the reason you couldn't reach her is that she wasn't dreaming, either because he's done something to her, drugged her maybe, or because she wasn't asleep, or at least not long enough to reach a dream state. Call Rebecca. I wish that conference calling thing worked here like it does in your dreams. We could really use Bob's advice on this as well."

Mom stood up and poured herself another cup of coffee. "See, there you go, just like I said. All you had to do was think about it. I have to get ready for work." She set her coffee cup down and hugged us both from behind. "I'm very proud of you both. And I'm sure you'll figure this out."

I went to my room, got my phone and called Rebecca. I had no fear of waking her; she's a five o'clock flower like me. I was surprised when I discovered she runs in the mornings too. She answered on the second ring.

"Hampton."

"Hi, it's me. I almost had her this morning."

"Really! That's great, but what do you mean almost?"

"Just what I said; I tried all night but couldn't find her, then this morning I got a sudden flash, but just as I got it my alarm clock went off and woke me up. We've been talking and we think maybe the reason I haven't been able to reach her is because he's either done something to her, like maybe drugged her, or that she just hasn't been asleep. Like he's keeping her awake or just not letting her sleep long enough to dream."

There was a pause before she answered, "It could be either of those. Sleep deprivation is a classic technique for breaking someone down, and it fits his pattern; methodical, careful, systematic in what he does. I'm worried if that's the case, the level of disorientation that can cause may stop her from fighting back. We certainly don't want that."

"No, we certainly don't. Assuming I can get through to her is there anything I can do that will help."

"Surprising as it may seem," she answered sarcastically, "I'm not an expert on torture. Believe it or not the FBI doesn't actually do that sort of thing; perhaps you could try the CIA? Just kidding, ask Bob, maybe he will have some answers. The only suggestion I have is that if you get through to her, stress how important it is that she keep fighting."

"Yeah, I figured that one out already. I'll call Bob and see if he has any ideas."

Actually I did have an idea, but it depended on how my other experiment was going. I had another call to make before I tried Bob. I picked up the house phone and dialed.

Karen sounded tired when she answered the phone, "Hello."

"Hi, Karen, just wondering how Tom is doing this morning? He didn't look good last night and I was worried about him."

"Well thank you, Jimmy. I truly appreciate your concern. Actually he seems to be doing much better this morning. Not only did he finish his breakfast he actually asked for more. It's very encouraging. I called the doctor to make sure it was okay to give him extra and they were thrilled."

"That's great, Karen. Well, give him our love. I think Allison wants to talk to Shannon. She's giving me 'the look.'"

She actually laughed at that one, "Oh no! Not 'the Look.' Let me get her for you. Thanks for calling, Jimmy, really. It means a lot to me."

"Well, hearing you laugh means a lot to me. Here's Allison, you can talk to her while you're hunting for Shannon."

Allison had been looking at me like I was insane but she played along, "Hi, Karen. So Tom's doing better? Cool..."

I was already walking away and dialing Bob's cell phone. He didn't answer so I left a message for him to call me back. Odd that he wouldn't answer his phone but I didn't have time to dwell on it as Allison was finishing with Shannon.

"So what was that all about?" she asked.

"I don't know. I just needed a reason to get off the line so I could call Bob. What did you and Shannon talk about?"

"Nothing. I told her I was covering for you because you were up to something and we made girl talk for a few minutes. She's coming over tonight. So what exactly are you up to?"

"I was checking on something I did last night with Tom. I kind of tweaked his subconscious to try and improve his appetite and how he perceives food."

"You did what?"

"Well, you know that whole subconscious projection thing you brought up and how it seems to be a lot stronger in dreams?"

"You went into Tom's dream and played with his subconscious? I hope that's what you were talking to Bob about. It sounds kind of risky. What exactly did you do?"

"Of course I talked to Bob about it first! I'm not stupid enough to try that on someone without professional advice. In fact, I had Bob come along and watch what I did."

"Which was?"

"Well, Bob thinks that what I'm doing is sort of an instant post-hypnotic suggestion, so what I did was plant the idea that Tom's chemotherapy is like a workout so he gets hungry afterward. I also sort of changed the way he tastes food; instead of actually tasting what is in his mouth at the moment, he remembers what it is supposed to taste like. It's like I bypassed the taste buds entirely."

"Wow, I never thought you could do something like that. I wonder if you gave him something blindfolded and told him it was something else, what he would taste? You know that has serious potential."

"Yeah, it does. The reason I called just now was to see if it was working or not. Rebecca is worried that the killer may break Angela down sooner if he's doing what she thinks he is. I need to talk to Bob about whether there is anything I can do that will help her fight off the affects of sleep deprivation. That's our best guess at what he's doing and why I haven't been able to bridge her."

"And it's working?"

"Karen said not only did he eat all of his breakfast this morning, he actually asked for seconds."

Tears formed in her eyes as she hugged me. "You are just too wonderful for words. I love you." She pulled back and wiped her eyes just as Mom came around the corner.

"I love you too. Why the tears?" she asked.

"Your son talked to Bob last night, then he bridged Tom and sort of hypnotized him so that he eats more. We just found out it worked. He ate all his breakfast this morning and asked for seconds."

Suddenly I was surrounded by arms. "That is wonderful news. Your father and I were so worried about all the weight he has lost. Maybe someone needs to suggest that as a standard therapy tool for cancer patients. Well, I have to go to work. Jimmy, you may want to think about trying to take a nap sometime today. If he's not letting Angela sleep at night you may get lucky and reach her during the day."

She disappeared out the door, leaving Allison and I staring at each other. It never occurred to me to try during the day.

"That's actually a good idea," I said.

"Yeah, and I've got a better one." She took my hand and started pulling me toward the hall. "Let's see if I can't help tire you out."

It didn't work, the first time. I did doze off for a few minutes but there was no sign of Angela. When I woke up Allison was already hard at work getting me ready to try again. If there is a better way to wake up than in a girl's mouth I haven't found it yet. I felt a small twinge of guilt that I was happy we got to try again, but I tried not to let it bother me too much. The nice thing about the later rounds is that it takes longer and you have to work harder at it. We didn't take a nap again right away, but broke for lunch and then started over again. I had no trouble falling asleep after that. Walking may have proved beyond me at that point, but sleeping I could do.

Jackpot! Almost as soon as I closed my eyes I felt Angela's fear and pain. I found her in a little room with no windows or doors, huddled naked in the corner, crying softly. The wave of sympathy was almost instantly wiped out as intense rage washed over me. It took a few seconds but I managed to set the rage aside as Rebecca had taught me, I just shoved it into the little box I had created for it and tried to think.

This was going to be tough. I didn't know her mental state but I wasn't sure at this point that she was going to be receptive to anyone suddenly appearing out of no where. And I really wasn't sure how well she would respond to any guy right at the moment. I realized then that I should have asked Bob and Rebecca about this part. Allison appeared beside me, and started to move toward her, but I stopped her. We were still invisible so we had a little time to try and figure out what to do.

"I don't know what to do. I should have asked Bob or Rebecca what to do when I found her. I don't have any idea how to comfort a rape victim."

She tore her arm away from me and stalked towards Angela. "She doesn't need comfort. She needs her ass kicked. Make me look like her."

"Allison don't you think she..."

She almost shouted, "Do it! Now! We may not have much time." She turned to me, tears in her eyes, and whispered, "Please?"

The look on her face said it all. This was going to hurt. I nodded and suddenly a second Angela appeared in the room. She was dressed in her running clothes, with her hair back in that long braid I always loved to watch bounce back and forth over that gorgeous ass as she ran. Focus, Matthews! Jesus. I waited to see what Allison had in mind.

It was a very short wait. The new Angela kicked the foot of the trembling husk on the floor. "Get up!" When she didn't move she kicked her again. "Get up, god dammit! What the hell is wrong with you?"

The naked girl looked up finally and her eyes started to focus on the girl before her, "Who are you?"

"You know damn well who I am. I'm you, only right now, you, are making me sick. Since when do you give up like this?" She reached down, grabbed a handful of dirty hair, and screamed, "Get up!"

Oh yeah, that got a reaction!

The naked girl swung her arm and screamed, "Let go of me, you bitch! I'm fucking tired."

Allison knelt before her and cupped her face, "That's more like it. You're not tired, Angela. You're asleep. This is a dream and, here, no one can hurt you. Here you're never tired if you don't want to be." Her voice softened and she said, "Please get up. You don't belong here." She took her hands and gently pulled her to her feet and hugged her. By the time she stepped back I had cleaned Angela up and dressed her to match Allison.

"You see, it's a dream and you can do anything you want here. Hell, you did Jimmy and the girls here." I took the cue and changed the scene to the cabana. "You don't have to be tired. Not here. Now listen to me, you're in trouble here and that's the truth. But you're not alone. Right this second there are people who love you looking for you. The FBI is looking for you. Total strangers are looking for you. I've been looking for you."

"What do you mean you've been looking for me? I thought you were me."

"I did, but I lied; I just needed to get your attention. I'm not really you, just like he isn't really Tim." She pointed to me and I dutifully stepped into the scene looking like Angela's brother.

"Where did you come from? Who are you? What's going on?"

"We're your friends," I said. "We've been trying to find you. We would have found you sooner but he, the guy who kidnapped you, has been keeping you from sleeping." I waved my arm around. "I only work in dreams. I couldn't find you because when I was asleep, you were awake. He's been keeping you awake to break you, Angela. He's trying to wear you down. You can't let him do that. No matter what he does, you have to keep fighting."

"But how can I fight if I can't rest."

"I can help." I stepped up and took her hand. "I want you to pick a place. Any place you want, any place you can think of, just close your eyes and think of it. Go ahead, do it."

She closed her eyes and the scene changed. We were at the picnic table in my back yard the night my parents almost died. I smiled at Allison and turned back to Angela.

"Open your eyes. From now on, every time you fall asleep, you will come here. No waiting, just straight here, and no matter how long you're here you will rest."

"You're serious?"

"Yeah, I'm serious. You'll rest and your body will recover much faster than normal. The body does need sleep, but it can get by on a lot less than normal for short times if it has to. You just need to manage it better. That's all I'm doing, letting you manage it better. Now, what can you tell us about what happened to you? Can you tell us, or better yet, show us, what he looks like?"

She pulled away. "I've never seen him."

"Not even when he kidnapped you?"

"No, not even..."

Suddenly I was standing in the glade still looking like Tim, with Allison still looking like Angela. The likeness faded as she stepped in to hug me and the tears flowed freely.

I took her in my arms and held her to me as she wept. "Fight Angel, wherever you are, fight hard."

We woke to the phone ringing. The recorder picked up before I got it and Bob's voice came over the machine.

"Hey, Jimmy, I got your message, I would have called sooner but I left my phone in my desk last night, then when I got here the battery was dead, anyway, give me call when..."