Chapter 33: Jonathon

I left Cindy and Jackie alone in the bathroom hoping Jackie could talk to her. Besides that, I wanted to have a chat with Jim. I led Jim out to the patio, making sure we were alone.

"Jim, I'm kind of pissed at you. I didn't like what you did last night," I told him.

"But Jackie wanted me to have sex with her. I didn't know it would piss you off," Jim replied, visibly shaken.

"I'm not talking about Jackie, what you two did is between you and her. I'm talking about Cindy. Look, Cindy didn't want to have sex, not with you or anyone else. She was scared as it was and then you started pushing her. Jim, no means no, not yes, not maybe, it means no! Don't ever let me hear about you trying to force a girl to do something she doesn't want to do, understand?"

It wasn't a question, I meant what I said. I liked Cindy and I knew she was still smarting from what happened to her sister. She was my friend and I was going to protect her the best I could. Since moving to Florida, I found there was a big difference between friends and acquaintances. Most of the guys I used to hang with weren't really friends. I thought they were, but now I knew the difference.

"Hey, I thought she wanted to, she went to bed with me," Jim said in his defense.

Jim was being a jerk and I wanted to grab him by the throat. Instead, I tried to make him understand in a more subtle way. "I was in the same bed and I can tell you I didn't want to fuck, or be fucked by you! Just because Cindy was in the same bed doesn't mean she wanted to do what YOU wanted. Jim, you lost your cheery, be happy, but don't ever try to push Cindy or anyone else.

"You know, the sad thing about this is I think Cindy liked you. You two could have gotten together if you hadn't been a jerk about it," I told Jim.

Jim's clinched fists relaxed and he sighed. "Really? Shit, I like Cindy. I guess I was thinking with the wrong head, wasn't I?"

"So it would seem. If I were you, I would just tell her you're sorry, if you are, and let it go for now. Maybe she'll reconsider how she feels if you do. Jim, be smart about this. Don't try to explain yourself, it will just backfire on you," I said.

"Okay, thanks, JR. I'm sorry I pissed you off."

I know guys, and I know how hard it is to admit it when you're wrong. Jim stepped up to the plate, with me anyway. I hoped he would do the right thing with Cindy. I found my suit and put it on. Jim and I went in the house to find Cindy and Jackie in the kitchen. They were also dressed.

Jim shuffled his feet for a moment. He took a deep breath and walked over to where Cindy was sitting.

"Cindy, sorry, I was a jerk," Jim said and then he walked away.

Cindy looked at me for a moment and stood up. She managed to catch Jim before he left the room. Jim turned around and said, "I'm really sorry."

"Okay, thanks for telling me that, Jim. I think we had too much to drink and things just went wrong. Maybe next time you'll understand when I say I'm not ready," Cindy said.

"Next time?" Jim said.

"Yes, if you still want to hang around with me. Jim, I don't think you meant to hurt me." Cindy giggled. "I think you just got too turned on. Jim, I don't hate you, not at all. I'm not saying that I don't want to make love with you—to tell the truth, I don't know. I do know that I'm not ready to make love, or screw, anyone. If you can live with that, we can be friends, good friends."

Jim just stood there with his mouth hanging open. Jackie and I smiled at each other. After a few moments, I went over to Cindy, putting my arm around her shoulders.

"Cindy, I think it would be a good idea for you and Jim to have a nice talk. You need to tell Jim what you want, what you're willing to do, and what you're not willing to do. Jim, you need to do the same thing. Then you guys can talk about it," I said.

"How the fuck did you get so smart?" Jim asked me.

"I'm not all that smart, Jim. The Program has done a lot for me though. I've learned about confidence, my self confidence. Before I moved down here, I was just a punk trying to be a hood. I wore black clothing and hung around with a bunch of losers—I was a loser. My mom got tired of the cops bringing me home so she shipped me down here.

"The drive down gave me a chance to think about where I was headed, and if that's what I really wanted out of life. When I got into the truck to head to Florida, I was thinking of how to get back to Michigan. By the time I got down here, I had changed my mind and decided to try changing." I chuckled and pointed at Jackie.

"Then I met my cousins and got to know them. Jackie and Mo were the exact opposite of me, at least the old me. They were what we used to call rah-rah girls, kids that were popular in school. I got a new wardrobe and a new chance."

The other kids came into the room, taking seats around the table. When they heard me talking, they didn't interrupt me. Jackie waved me over to her. I took a seat next to Jackie while Cindy and Jim sat across from us.

"I have to admit, I was smitten with Jackie from the moment I laid eyes on her. We hadn't seen each other in years, since my father's funeral. The first day I was here, Jackie said something that made me really start thinking about what changes I was willing to make."

"What did I say?" Jackie asked as she took my hand.

I laughed and said, "You asked me why I smoked. Remember, we were standing by my truck. I was still wearing black jeans and a black tee shirt. You were wearing a pink mini skirt and a white tank top."

"You still remember what she was wearing?" Cindy asked.

"Sure, like it was yesterday. Anyway, Jackie asked me why I smoked. I didn't have a good answer so I put out the cigarette and haven't smoked since then. That was the beginning of my transformation. Jackie and Mo took me shopping. They showed me what to buy, helping me choose the right styles and colors. I know it sounds lame, but it was another turning point for me, I asked someone for help, something I wasn't used to doing.