Chapter 5

It was the Saturday before 'spring break' when Becca unexpectedly showed up at Gwen's apartment in a hysterical state. Gwen soon found herself holding Becca as she sat sobbing and shaking violently.

"Okay Becca, calm down, tell me what happened." Gwen was trying to comforter her, but Becca's outburst had Gwen's nerves on edge also.

It took her almost two hours to calm down enough to talk. When Becca finally moved away from the comfort of her friend's arms to sit up, Gwen quickly went to get a bottle of water and aspirin for each of them.

Gwen sat down and waited until Becca had taken a couple of the white tablets and drank some water before she asked, "Now do you feel good enough to talk about it?"

Becca nodded her head and licked her lips, her mouth still felt dry. Looking at Gwen, Becca replied, "When we were at the club last night I was having fun dancing with the guys and girls who came by. You were right I needed the interaction to recharge my batteries to get ready for my talk with Darren after the break.

"I was laughing at you using every trick known trying to get that tall black guy's attention. Since you left the club at the same time, I assume you finally found some common ground?"

"Yeah we have another date Tuesday. He made me smile a lot last night."

Becca tried to force a smile, but failed as she continued. "Well as you know I wasn't drinking alcohol so I was comfortable on my own. The guys and girls at the table were keeping our drinks refilled. I trusted everyone so I wasn't worried about anything.

"About an hour after you left I started to feel funny and shortly there after I lost track of everything until I woke up about four hours ago. I was in a strange bedroom and in bed with somebody. It was obvious from the irritation when I tried to move that I had sex with somebody.

"Gwen, I was so scared it made me sick to my stomach. When I got out of the bed, thankfully there was a bathroom off the bedroom 'cause I lost everything from the night before.

"Afterwards, I checked for evidence of rape and found none other than a moderately sore and puffy crotch. I began looking for my clothes and quickly got dressed.

"As I tried to sneak out, a hand grabbed my arm and I screamed in fright. Twirling, I found myself looking into the gloating eyes of Hayden Olsson.

"He grabbed my face and forcibly kissed me as he spouted off, 'Now you're mine bitch, I finally claimed you. Don't let me catch anyone sniffing around my property. Get going and be here Monday night for our next romp. You were okay last night, a little too laid back, but I expect you'll perform better next time.'

"Jerking away from his grasp, I yelled, 'You bastard, how could you?' I grabbed my purse and ran to the living room. 'See you Monday, ' he shouted as I fled out the door.

"I can still hear that rat faced bastard's sarcastic laugh just before the door slammed shut behind me.

"When I got outside I walked for a while because my car wasn't any where in sight. Finally I got to a bus stop and eventually back to the club.

"Thankfully my car was in the lot. After getting back to my room, I showered three times and I can still feel his slimy touch.

"I went to Darren's apartment first but he wasn't home, so I came here, I'm sorry, I just had to talk to someone. I feel so dirty... so used... so violated. The bad part is I can't do shit about it, the ass wipe obviously used a condom every time he had his way with me.

"Honestly Gwen, I feel as though I'm trapped in some bittersweet nightmare, should I 'regret' or be 'thankful' that he used condoms. I don't have a shred of evidence, but at least I'm clean and shouldn't have to worry about an STD or worse a pregnancy.

"The worst of it, I truly have no one to blame but myself. When you first mentioned and invited me to go to the club with you, I knew from overhearing people at work that Hayden was going to be there.

"I knew in my heart I shouldn't go. Not with all the trouble he has been causing me at work and his constant remarks and attempts to get me to go out with him. With you there and all my other friends, I overrode my better judgment and thought I could handle the situation."

"Why didn't you tell me about your concerns, I would never have left you there?" Gwen inquired.

"Hayden hadn't said or done a thing all evening. He was sitting four or five tables away with his two buddies. My guard was down, I was just relaxing and enjoying the interactions with everyone," Becca sniffed.

Gwen immediately responded, "Surely you're not trying to blame yourself for being drugged and raped. It wasn't something you could have foreseen."

"No, but I have to ask myself why I was out trying to have fun with other people when the only person I truly want to be with is Darren? If I had stayed home and waited for our talk, or at least contacted him instead of going out, this would never have happened.

"There seems to be no end to my selfish behavior. So who do I blame? Hayden is an asshole and a rapist, but I'm the idiot who provided him with an easy target," Becca sobbed as she began to cry again.

With her head in Gwen's lap, Becca cried out her pain while Gwen did her best to soothe her. As she calmed down, Becca asked, "Do you think I am truly worthy of someone like Darren? Even though I love him with all my heart, I just seem to keep messing up our lives.

"I don't want to hurt or cause him any more pain. Do you think it would be best if I just walked away and let him get on with his life? Especially after this?"

Softly and quietly, Gwen replied, "Girl there is no one more worthy. If he can't forgive poor judgment then he's doomed to a life of lonely misery. I've never met anyone who makes perfect decisions.

"That man needs you, he needs your love and devotion. You owe it to yourselves to make your lives as fantastic as possible. That will only happen if you two are together. It's time for you to consider going home and I don't mean to your parents."

"Actually, if you are going to blame someone, then blame me. I'm sorry, all this occurred because I pressured you into going out. If I had kept my mouth shut and let you do what you wanted, just to stay at home waiting for Darren, none of this would have happened." Gwen apologized with tears flowing down her cheeks.

"I just don't know, I jussst donnn't knowwww," Becca's said as her voice slowly drifted off into a fitful sleep.

Finally after getting her friend to sleep Gwen made a decision and tried to call Darren three or four times over the next few hours but no one answered.

Gwen knew it was going to be another one of those long weekends and Becca was correct, Hayden had gotten away with somehow drugging and raping her. There wasn't anything anyone could do about it. 'Damn it to hell, this is when I wish I had at least a little meanness. I'd get a gun, hunt that S.O.B. down, and shoot him myself.' She angrily thought to herself, 'Hell, I'd even pay someone to do if I only knew anyone who would.' With exasperation, she felt, 'It's hell being nice all the time.'

Darren returned two days early, filled with anticipation in hopes of seeing Becca. He desperately wanted to talk with her, to tell her how he felt, he needed her back in his life.

Their separation had made his love more intense, a fact which almost made their time apart unbearable. She just had to feel the same way, the alternative was unthinkable. He could not stand to lose her.

Because he couldn't find Becca, the two days proved to be a mistake. Living in the apartment with all of its ghostly recollections only served to painfully refresh agonizing hours of memories.

The first day back to class, Darren was at his wit's end, still no word from Becca. He was beginning to wonder if it was over, had he lost her for forever? Just as he was leaving his final class for the day he heard someone call out, "Darren!"

Stopping and looking around, he could not spot anyone he knew, shaking his head, he turned to go. There was a tug on his arm and he looked down into a very familiar pair of light blue eyes staring back up at him from beneath a head of blond hair.

After taking a couple of seconds to fully focus on the pretty face in front of him, he realized it was Becca. Only she wasn't a redhead any more, she was her natural blond again.

Good lord, she looked even more beautiful. The change in hair color completely changed the way she looked. It was like staring at a supermodel.

Darren wondered why he was shaking as he tried to pull himself together. "I like the hair now that I've seen it." Darren nervously muttered.

"I was hoping you would, I did it for you," she smiled up at him. 'Boy does he look good, ' ran through her mind.

Catching herself she said, "I'm sorry I didn't call last night, I hope I didn't upset you. But my plane got in real late, so I decided it was probably best to wait. I wasn't sure of your schedule but I figured you would be in the business college sooner or later. If not, I was going to stake out the apartment after my last class.

"Darren I'd like to talk to you later in the commons, maybe about seven thirty. We need to talk... about a lot of things, and I'd like it to be in a neutral setting... at least to start with.

"If things go like I think they will, I have something I need to tell you when we are alone." She nervously wet her lips before continuing, "And Darren, I've missed you."

Up until that moment Darren hadn't been sure where the conversation was headed. Becca's little come on smile and the fact she had missed him said a lot.

He was now relaxed and no longer shaking. He smiled back and said, "I've missed you too, Becca. Seven-thirty will be fine, I'll see you then."

At his words Darren watched her eyes light up as a tear trickled down her face. He wiped it off her cheek and whispered softly, "Yeah, I'll definitely be there."

Becca felt a shiver go through her body at his touch. She turned and began to walk away. She knew if she didn't she might take him down right there in the hallway, and neither of them could afford to be expelled.

Moving off in the other direction, Darren looked back over his shoulder, almost running into a pole. Having glanced back at that precise moment, Becca couldn't help but chuckle as she turned back, lost in her own little world.

Becca didn't notice a pair of eyes burning a hole in her back as she turned to walk away. Those eyes were filled with malice and hate.

Hayden bent down and whispered something in the ear of the pretty little coed under his arm. As he pointed at Darren, she nodded and as they walked off together, Hayden had that sinister smile on his face again.

Arriving early, Becca sat in a booth near the front entrance of the commons. In her mind she was mentally rehearsing what she wanted to say to Darren. Her desire for everything to be perfect had her anxiously readjusting herself on the hard bench every few minutes.

Her mouth was dry and she had already drunk one bottle of water. Her nervousness showed as she kept thrumming her fingers and playing with her empty water bottle, tapping it on the table.

Darren came directly from the Library entering through the back door at twenty-five after seven. He was nervously searching for Becca.

The throng of students not only blocked his way, but made it difficult to see very much of the commons. As he stood there three big frat guys moved in front of him and he half listened to them, frustrated at his inability to move further into the building.

One of the two goons blocking his way asked the third guy who was standing in front of them, "Okay, just why are we here again?"

He heard a voice he thought he recognized reply, "Ok, one more time. My woman is sitting over by the door waiting for her former boyfriend to show up at seven-thirty.

"She is going to tell him she doesn't want to ever see him again. We have a signal worked out if the guy gives her any shit.

"Since we became lovers a few weeks ago, she can't get enough of me. For that matter, she loves what I do to her body and I have to admit, I love what she does to mine.

"She is one hot mamma who seems to be horny all the time. Hell, I can still see that cute little heart shaped birth mark just above her pussy, pointing the way, almost saying, 'Put it in here, ' as I pound it to her. God she loves to fuck.

"I've been promised her virgin ass for the first time tonight. That's my reward for helping her get dickhead out of the way.

"There, see the little flip of her bottle? That's the signal she wants to talk to me." The guy hidden from Darren's view said.

Darren looked around the bigger of the two guys, his eyes searching for a girl with a bottle. His knees went weak and he suddenly felt nauseous as his stomach lurched.

The girl by the front door with the bottle in her hand was Becca, but he already knew it would be; he knew of no other girl with a 'Cute heart shaped birth mark pointing the way to her pussy.'

As Darren watched, the guy with the familiar voice started towards Becca's booth. Darren immediately recognized Hayden from Becca's work.

'What the hell's going on?' Darren wondered with a sickening lump in the pit of his stomach. A lump that rapidly increased in size as Darren watched Hayden stride across the floor and bend over Becca's table, blocking his view of Becca but leaving no doubt they were face to face in deep conversation.

The lump reached epic proportions as Darren could tell Hayden leaned in for what was obviously not only a kiss but a long one. Even though he couldn't see Becca, Hayden's body language left no doubts as to what was happening.

He felt as if the room were suddenly spinning, 'No! She was setting me up today, just leading me on so she could rip out my heart again.' Darren knew he had to get out of there before he collapsed; he pushed past the guy in front and then did a U-Turn out the back door.

His pulse was racing as he staggered to his car. Sitting in the gathering darkness, all he could hear was his pulse pounding loudly in his ears. His own private gloom threatened to overwhelm him as he tried to make sense of Becca's actions.

He leaned his head on the steering wheel and cried, it wasn't a manly thing, but he hurt so bad. It felt as if a knife had sliced his heart and soul open.

Inside the commons Becca kept looking at the clock and the front door. It was quarter till eight and there was no sign of Darren. A deep sense of rejection and loss began to gnaw at her heart while sharing space with the anger and resentment over what Hayden had just said and tried.

Her frustration with Hayden boiled quickly into anger as he had come over to her booth all smiles. His comment that she evidently knew he was going to be there and was waiting for him, was nothing compared to her anger at his attempt to lean in and kiss her.

She had turned her head and angrily demanded that he leave immediately. Hayden just leaned into her ear and whispered, "I will always be here with you, that you can count on."

Becca had reacted with a threat, "Get your... ass... out of my face and don't... ever... come near me again, or I will scream for security." Hayden had just laughed as he slowly turned and walked away.

Shoving her anger aside, Becca whispered to herself, "Please Darren, don't do this to me... to us. I'll crawl back if I have to, but it would be so much better if you ask me."

The first tear rolled down her beautiful face and on to the table. She felt it wouldn't be her last of the evening.

Hayden had watched with smug satisfaction as lover boy pushed past his two friends then reversed himself and ran out the door. As soon as the door clicked shut behind him, Hayden discretely pointed to a coed who was standing alone by the front door.

She nodded then quickly exited the commons catching sight of her target staggering towards the parking lot. The coed moved after him and saw him get into his car.

Hayden had hoped lover boy would come through the back door so he could play with the idiot's head, but either way his plan would have worked.

Looking back towards the front door, Hayden watched his little blond conquest fidget in her seat until eight o'clock then slowly pick up her things to leave. He could tell Becca was crying.

'I told you when I claimed you no one else better come sniffing around 'my' property. Looks like a little lesson is going to be necessary, ' he thought smiling to himself.

Darren sat in his car for a long time hoping this was all just a nightmare and that he would soon wake up. His nerves were stretched so thin, his heart almost stopped from the shock of a soft knock on the driver's window. Realizing someone was standing next to the car, he composed himself and rolled his window down.

A soft female voice said, "Darren, hi, I'm so glad I caught you. Sure hope this isn't a bad time and you can help me.

"I'm in your Art class and have a big problem. I lost the instructions for the project we need to complete. Do you happen to have a copy I could borrow?"