Chapter 3

Becca tried to gather her thoughts as she lay awake watching the ceiling stare back at her, 'Has it already been eleven months? After Darren decided to take summer classes, I remember how tickled I was when he asked me to stay over with him.

'Even though he warned me the summer would be brutal and he would need to put in long hours of study to qualify for grad school, I am still pissed. During the spring semester Darren got so one tracked if I didn't pester him, he would zone out and forget I was here.

'I know he took full course loads while I only signed up for one class during each of the summer terms.' She paused a moment regrouping her thoughts before continuing her self argument, 'I had to cut back on classes because I had to work. It wasn't an option for me, I had to make more money for the coming year.

'Everything was cool for the first couple of months, but now summer is almost over. I want to do things with him, but he is always too busy to even talk, let alone go anywhere.

'When we do talk, it's nothing but a constant nibbling at each other, no damn it, now it's just plain ole fighting. I'm sorry, I need more attention. We both need to have more fun and now he's telling me the fall semester is going to be just as bad.'

She listened to the voice of reason in her head. 'He's really trying to do well; he just needs time to get through this final summer semester.

'I think I'm going to take Gwen's advice and go with the gang from the office Friday night. A few drinks and a little dancing would be a nice change from being cooped up twenty-four/seven.

'It will be fun and a great tension relief. At least my best girlfriend is thinking about my mental stability. I'll explain to Darren in the morning.'

She rolled over and slowly fell asleep waiting for her guy to get home.

Darren left the library after midnight again. Making his way back to the apartment, he thought about Becca. "Damn it, the faster I try to get through with my studies the longer it seems to take.

'I know Becca's fed up. She wants and needs more time with me, hell it's just as rough on me, I need more time with her. We both need to put some fun back into our lives and do it together. When she's free, I am knee deep in studying; when I'm free, she is either working or in class.

'Saturday morning we need to sit down and talk, work out some time together. Maybe we could go see one of the plays she's been talking about, or at least take in a movie. We have some extra cash put back.

'That would be a lot of fun and I am in need of some battery recharging. The main point, just spend some carefree time together, let off some steam. The demand for papers this semester has been horrid.'

Arriving home Darren stumbled into bed after setting his alarm for six, "Early day tomorrow," he mumbled kissing Becca, cuddling into her he was asleep in seconds.

Becca was up and moving at 8:30 the following morning. She was going to talk to Darren about her plans to go out with the people from her office after work.

Walking into the kitchen she was surprised to find a note on the white board about an unexpected assignment so Darren had an early start. He had signed off, 'Baby please don't wait up we can talk in the morning, Love ya "D."

That was it, Becca lost her grip, she began shouting and crying. "Damn it... you're damn right I won't wait up. How much of this do you think I can take?

"If this is what you 'think' makes a good relationship, well mister, you have another 'think' coming. I am going dancing tonight and that's final. If you can ignore me, let's see if you can ignore that."

She crossed through his message and tersely wrote, 'Out with friends, I'll be really late or at Gwen's if too loaded. See you whenever. Becca.'

Becca was obviously very hostile when she arrived at the office. Hayden Olsson, another student office worker with whom she and Gwen usually shared lunch hour with, followed her to the back.

"Hey, you don't look so good. What's going on?" His voice sounding concerned. Becca suddenly realized Hayden was standing closer to her than she liked but not so familiar to be uncomfortable.

Becca couldn't help herself as she began to cry again. "Is Gwen here yet?" she asked.

"No!" Hayden replied, "She took today off to help set up the club for tonight's party. Can I help or is this a girl's only kind of thing?"

One thing Becca had come to appreciate about Hayden, despite his occasional outburst of macho maleness was the fact he did seem to know when to let the girls talk among themselves.

Her increasingly higher pitched voice gave away her fragile emotions, "No, just peeved at my boyfriend right now... I'm sick and tired of being taken for granted." Suddenly Becca couldn't hold back, Hayden opened his arms and she went to him, sobbing on his chest.

She heard Hayden say, "This guy needs to get a grip on reality. What a jerk to do this to you."

Becca's heart wanted to tell him he was wrong, that Darren was actually a nice guy. But for the moment her emotions ruled, her silence agreed with Hayden.

After she calmed down, Hayden gently let her go, keeping his hands on her shoulders. Catching her gaze, he touted, "Tell you what; I'll make sure we dance with each other as much as possible tonight.

That way you can tell this lunk-head he better get on the stick. You have another guy interested... and you won't be lying, ok?"

Becca nervously glanced at his hands on her shoulders. "We'll see about tonight, but for now I have to figure out how to make things right with my boyfriend."

Hayden jerked his hands back holding them up like Becca had a gun. "Sorry, my only expertise is dancing, that's all I have to offer."

Becca turned and headed for the girl's room to compose herself. Hayden watched her cute little butt as she walked away. Just as she reached the restroom door, he mumbled to himself, "Strange chick, but tonight we'll see if my hands bother her after few drinks and some belly rubbing on the dance floor."

As she went through the restroom door, instead of stopping when she heard him mumble something, Becca just continued on, choosing to ignore him.

Becca felt exhausted. Combined with her slight buzz, she decided it best to crash in Gwen's apartment. As she lay in Gwen's spare bed she thought back over the evening. 'I haven't had this much fun in a long time. The music... the laughter... I think I danced with everyone. I even kept a perfect buzz all night but never let it get beyond that.

'As the designated driver Gwen did a good job of watching over me so nobody got too out of hand. However, I was buzzed enough that I was surprised by Hayden's sudden come on when he got me isolated in the hallway just before we left.

'I allowed him to kiss me for a moment or two, but when he tried to French kiss me, I pushed him away. He can't kiss anywhere near as good as Darren and he won't be getting another chance to try either.

'The 'no harm, no foul' rule I guess applies for now, but I will need to be careful around that one. He is cagey, he slipped through my defenses quicker than anyone I've ever experienced.

'I really need to talk to Darren today and work out some of these feelings of anger. He really is special to me; I'm just frustrated with him.'

She looked at the clock it was 4:30 in the morning, 'Time to sleep.'

Darren glanced over at the clock once more, it was five minutes later than the last time. He finally just gave up, it was six o'clock in the morning and he was exhausted after a sleepless night without Becca.

He began talking out loud to help him think things through. "Now what do I do, I can't give up on school and I don't want to give up on Becca.

"God I wish she would call so I could stop worrying. Why didn't she just talk to me about a night out with some friends? I would have understood and I wouldn't have worried about her all night."

Thinking back to the afternoon before, "Yeah, turns out I'm ruining the grade curve so my teacher excuses me from finals. So, stupid me, I rushed to finish my last two papers, picked up some Chinese take out, and hurry home thinking I'm going to be in my girls arms.

"But... nooo, all I get is a note on a board saying 'Gone dancing and staying out all night.' Ending with a flippant threat, 'See you whenever.' He could feel the sarcastic anger rolling off his own answer, "Damn it, I told her this semester and the fall term would be hell."

Exhaling loudly he shook his head, "I know it might look like I don't care, but she's wrong. She's is so neat, so alive; I can honestly say I've never met anyone like her before in my life. She makes me so proud when we're out together, especially since it's me she wants to be with.

"I need to get away and think for a day or two, cool down, so I don't strike out at her. Maybe I should do some hiking, camp out over night, and get my head straight."

He threw together a backpack with his sleeping bag, some fruit, veggies, and a couple of sandwiches, then filled his two boda bags with water. Cleaning off the kitchen table he left a note for Becca.

Hey Babe,

I am feeling a bit hostile and from your note on the board, you probably are too.