Chapter 2

I got to Diane's house a little early. It wasn't dark outside yet. It was mid dusk only. Diane was sitting on her porch, but so was her brother, Ricky. I acted like I had come to see Ricky, and he and I talked about how much money there was in being a caddy at the country club. Ricky had wanted to be a caddy, but he gave up on the idea after spending a month without being picked by the caddy master. I would have tried to put in a good word for Ricky, but the caddy master never let anyone interfere with his duties. He just hadn't liked Ricky for some reason, and never gave him his card.

"Ricky, Jackie and I have something we need to talk about, in private." I was surprised that Diane spoke up like that. I was fairly certain that she didn't want anyone thinking she was fooling around with me, mostly because I was a year younger than her.

"Are you trying to get him to help you with Billy? If you are, you're wasting your time. Billy and Margaret have been going steady for five or six years. He just breaks up with her when he can't stand her anymore. That only lasts for a few weeks, then they get back together." Ricky didn't like Billy. More importantly, he was afraid of him. Billy could be pretty mean to people like Ricky. Billy had treated Ricky poorly when he and Diane had gone out before.

"Get lost, Ricky, before I go get mom and tell her you're being a pest again." Ricky gave her the finger as he went back inside. I made a face like what Diane was telling him was none of my doing. As soon as Ricky was gone, Diane stood up from where she'd been sitting, and started walking straight for the woods. I let her lead, but I followed close behind her. After we turned at the Contino's house, and were out of sight of her house, I caught up with her, and walked along side of her.

"Ricky would have left in a few more minutes anyway. You didn't need to shoo him away like that."

"I got tired of waiting. You didn't help things by starting new conversations with him every time he started to wind down. Did you come to see him or me?"

"You, I came to see you, but now you might have made him suspicious."

"So what? I might not see you again the rest of the summer after tonight. What's he going to be suspicious of?" I didn't answer her. For some reason, she seemed like she was mad at me and everyone. I figured I wasn't in for too much fun with her being in a mood like she was.

"Why are you in such a snit, Diane? You haven't said one positive thing since I came over to see you. I don't remember doing anything wrong, so you'll have to tell me what I did."

"It's Margaret. She called me an hour ago and asked me to go over to New London to Ocean Beach with her and Billy tomorrow. After I said I'd go, then she told me that Herbert is coming with us. She keeps trying to throw him and me together. I really despise her. She wants to make me look bad in front of Billy." She seemed really angry. The thing was, I believed what Billy had told me.

If Billy was telling me the truth, then Diane was only pretending not to want to go with Herbert the next day. I wondered why she was going to all the trouble she was to make me think she didn't want to be with Herbert. She said she didn't like me, so why would she care what I thought? We were in the middle of the woods when Diane stopped suddenly. I had noticed when I came over to her house, that she was wearing a summer dress rather than her usual jeans and top. I didn't hang around with her enough to know how she usually dressed. Some girls always wore dresses, and some wore only jeans and slacks. Most girls varied what they wore. I didn't know about Diane. After she stopped, we just stood there for about a minute.

"Aren't you ever going to try to kiss me, Jackie?"

"I didn't know you wanted me to. Most of the time, you act like you think I'm ugly or something. I figured you wouldn't want me to kiss you."

"I like to kiss, and it's dark out now. I kissed Ray, and I want to see how you compare to him." I bent down and kissed her. She was only about five feet two, and I was over six feet tall, probably around six two. I had to bend way down to kiss her, and it felt a little bit awkward. Still, awkward or not, I did my best. After about ten minutes, we broke our clench. I was getting pretty warm, and I thought she was really starting to respond too. My eyes were adjusted to the low light in the woods, and I spotted a tree trunk that had been chopped down. It was still attached to the base, so it made a place where the two of us could sit. I led her over to it and I sat down at a place that was comfortable for my height. I patted the place higher up, so that our faces would be almost level with each other when she sat. I even stood back up and helped her up on the tree trunk. After I sat down again, we were the same height.

"So, who kisses better, Ray or me?"

"I'd have to say Ray is just a little better. He isn't so pushy with his tongue." She said it quietly, like it was her honest opinion. I'd never had any complaints about my kissing technique before. In fact, I'd had a lot of compliments, and several girls told me that was what made them decide to let me go further, because my kissing got them so excited. I didn't say anything, but I had just about decided that I was about done with Diane after we finished this little walk of ours. "Did what I said hurt your feelings, Jackie?"

"No. I didn't like the kissing much either. I guess we just don't have any spark together. That happens sometimes. I didn't feel anything while we were kissing. I thought it might be because I was uncomfortable having to lean so far down in order to kiss you, that's why I brought you over here."

"I didn't say it was terrible, or that I didn't like it, just that Ray kisses a little better. Don't pout, Jackie."

"I'm not pouting. Maybe we should just go back home now. You've got that trip to the beach, and I need to get up early to get to the golf course. I'm scheduled to carry doubles at seven twenty. I've got another loop at two o'clock, and that's a double also. Tomorrow is going to be a long day for both of us."

"It isn't even nine yet, Jackie. Didn't you want to do some other stuff with me?"

"If we can't even enjoy kissing together, what could we do that we'd both enjoy?" I had nothing to lose by starting to be bolder and a little more demanding. She wasn't exactly treating me nice, so I saw no reason to care that much about how the rest of the evening went.

"What do you want to do? You could beat off again if you wanted to. I like watching you squirt. I'll catch it for you again."

"What do I get out of it? Last time, you let me feel you up before I did that."

"I didn't let you. You just did it."

"You didn't like it when I touched you last time?"

"I liked it, but I was already a little hot when I let you do that. I'm not hot yet."

"Maybe we need Ray or Herbert out here with us to get you going? They seem to get you going better than I do."

"Jackie, I've told you that I don't like being around Herbert. That's all Margaret and Billy. I like Ray, but he's too young. I wouldn't let either of them feel me up."

"I heard you spent a lot of time squeezing and rubbing Herbert's dick today. That doesn't sound like he's someone you don't like being around."

"Who said that, Margaret?"

"Billy told me. He knows I like you, and he doesn't want me being treated like some sucker by you."

"It was Herbert's birthday, and I hadn't gotten him a present. Margaret suggested it to me. I just touched his pants, not his dick."

"Billy said you were rubbing his dick and squeezing it."

"So what? You aren't my boyfriend or anything. I don't have to ask your permission for anything I do."

"So, why did you lie to me. Why not tell the truth or say nothing?" Instead of answering me, Diane reached out and put her hand on my lap, moving it around until she found my lump. She squeezed it and traced the outline of it. I reached over and tried to give her one of my best kisses then, careful to be a little less insistent with my tongue this time. After a few seconds, when I kept my tongue in check, Diane started using her tongue more than she had before. I started touching her boobs and rubbing her butt with my other hand. We stayed like that for about ten minutes or so. She was rubbing and squeezing my dick, and I was manipulating her breast and nipple and rubbing her ass. She had leaned into me for the kiss, lifting up one haunch, so the hand on her butt was also rubbing the crease between her legs. I lifted up the bottom of her dress until my hand felt bare skin and panty. When I did that, she broke the kiss.

"If you try to touch me like that again, I'm going to go home, Jackie."

"Go home, I don't care. Billy was right about you."

"Right about what? What did he say about me?"

"He said you didn't let him do much."

"I didn't ever stop him. He didn't try to do anything except kiss me, and once he touched me on top. That's all he tried, and I never stopped him from doing anything."

"It doesn't matter anyway. If he wanted you for himself, he wouldn't be giving you to Herbert Martin."

"It isn't Billy, it's Margaret trying to do that."

"Margaret couldn't do it if Billy didn't go along. Go home, Diane, this isn't doing either of us any good."

"Are you still going to say something to Billy?"

"Only if he asks me"

"I'm sorry, Jackie, but I don't like being touched down there by you."

"Don't worry about it. I won't touch you anymore. Are you ready?"

"I don't want to go home yet. You're going to mess things up for me with Billy, aren't you?"

"I'm not going to mess anything up with anyone, Diane. If he asks me what happened, I'll tell him we didn't hit it off. I won't tell him why, not unless he asks me specifically. I don't think he will. He has Margaret." I was finished with this evening with Diane. I felt like I was always trying to run up a hill with her. She only did what she wanted to do. I liked what she wanted to do, but I should get something for myself out of it too. If I did what she wanted to do, she should let me do what I wanted too. I was fourteen years old, and had been somewhat spoiled by easy conquests at the Griswold Hotel dances. Those girls all seemed to like my looks, and thought I was exciting. Why should I spend time with a girl who didn't find me attractive? I got up, expecting that we would leave.

"Okay, you can touch me there, Jackie, but that's it. I'm not doing anything else with you." She sounded desperate. I figured she must really care about Billy. I didn't want to use that against her.

"No, let's go. I'm not going to say anything to Billy. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do."

"I do want to. You're turning out just like Billy, Jackie. The more he wanted to break up with me, the more I was willing to do to keep him. Even after, I started wanting him more because he broke up with me."

"That's a little sick, Diane. If I decide to leave right now and refuse to have anything more to do with you, how long will it be before you talk yourself into being willing to fuck me?" She started crying after I asked her that. Of course, her crying made me feel bad too.

"I came out for these walks with you because you remind me of Billy, Jackie. The nicer Billy, not the mean one who is always threatening to beat somebody up. You can be nice too, but you have a mean streak just like his. I didn't want you to have the same kind of power over me that Billy has, but now you do."

"I don't have any power over you, and neither does Billy, or anyone else. You aren't very honest with yourself, Diane. You create these situations yourself, in your own mind, then you act as if they were real. No one made you play with Herbert's cock, you wanted to do it. Billy isn't trying to get you to sleep with him, that's all in your mind, what you've decided you should do with him. I think you are getting a little bit sex crazy, and you aren't going to be satisfied until you get someone to fuck you."

"Will you?"

Will I fuck you? I don't think so. I don't think I'd be good for you. Billy wouldn't be either. You're too good to go out with someone like Herbert Martin. You should find someone nice, then start a normal relationship with him."

"I don't want someone nice. Billy told me almost the same thing about him not being right for me, and about how I needed to find someone better than him. I'm tired of people telling me that. I want Billy, but I can't have him. I'm willing to do it with you, tonight, right now. If you won't do it, then I guess it's Herbert tomorrow. I know he won't tell me to find someone else."

"That sounds like a good plan to me, Diane. Let's head back home."

"You don't care if I do it with Herbert?"

"Nope, it isn't any of my business. After tomorrow though, people will think about you the same way they think about Barbara. If you do it with Herbert Martin, anyone who believes he's as good as Herbert will just assume he can do it to you too. You'll be nothing but an easy lay." I turned away and started walking towards home. In a minute, a sniffling Diane caught up to me. We walked to her house in silence again. She wasn't the first girl I'd talked myself out of having sex with. There are times when the emotional damage and cost to the girl is greater than any pleasure that my getting laid would be. I tried not to cross over that line. Usually, I succeeded. Now, Diane had her own choices to make. I hoped for her sake that she didn't give herself to Herbert Martin.