Chapter 15

I woke up around 11 in the morning. My knee didn't hurt too much. It had swelled up over night and was so stiff I couldn't bend it. I showered and went downstairs for breakfast. Mom greeted me with a smile when I got to the kitchen.

"How are you feeling Kyle?" Mom asked.

"My knee is really swelled up. I can't bend it. It doesn't hurt as much as last night."

"Sit down and rest your leg. What do you want for breakfast?"

I did a double take. Mom usually makes us look after ourselves for breakfast and lunch. "Um, pancakes and sausage?" I asked hopefully.

"OK. Here is your medicine and a glass of water," Mom said as she handed me my pills. "Relax while I make you breakfast." I took them. Mom started cooking while I browsed through the newspaper.

"Where's Andy at?" I asked.

"Andy and Eric are out mowing lawns." Mom explained. Mom served me breakfast. When I was done eating she helped me get set up in the family room. I had ice for my knee, water to drink and a stack of DVD's to watch. I spent the afternoon with my left leg resting on the couch with ice packs on my knee.

I had a lot of visitors in the afternoon. Ed, Hal, Jeremy, Greg came right after lunch. Coach Caffrey stopped by later. We talked for awhile. George and his girlfriend Paige Evans stopped in. Justin, Sherry and Billy Baer stopped by too. Drew and Stacie stopped by on the way to the mall. Trent and Christian both called to find out how I was. Christian continued apologizing for what had happened. I assured him again that it wasn't his fault.

My knee started to hurt pretty bad later in the afternoon. I took my pain medication. I was kind of out of it after that. Andy, Heather, Eric and Sammy stopped in the family room to say hi before they went to the movies that night. Penny stopped by too, but I was lousy company. Penny wished me well and said she would come back tomorrow afternoon to talk again.

I went to bed right after supper. I was wiped out.

Mom got me up in time to have breakfast with the rest of the family on Sunday morning. I went back to my room when the rest of the family headed to church. I decided to catch up on my e-mails. I had been so busy the last month that I hadn't had time to read any of Julie's e-mails.

I was surprised when I realized I had 36 e-mails from Julie that went back to the end of August. How had almost six weeks passed without me reading her e-mails? I started reading with the oldest e-mails.

The first dozen from the end of August and early September were routine. Julie told me about her day, how things were going with cheerleading, about her classes, and the new friends she was making. She always signed the e-mails 'Love Julie'. The tone of the messages changed around the second weekend of September. Julie started asking why I wasn't writing to her. Julie expressed her concerns about not hearing from me in each subsequent message.

The e-mail she sent me on September 17th changed things. This is what it said:

?

To: kmartin87@redroses-net
From: simpsonj@gmail-com
Time: September 17 18:46:21

Kyle

I can't believe you haven't read any of my messages in over three weeks. How can you cut me off this way if you love me? We can't stay a couple completely cut off from each other. Please write immediately.

Your girlfriend?

Julie

Your girlfriend? I knew I had gotten too preoccupied with school and football, but were things so bad that Julie didn't want me for a boyfriend anymore? I continued reading her daily e-mails from that week. Julie's impatience and anger became clearer as I read on. She didn't say she loved me or missed me anymore. Even with a half dozen messages telegraphing what was coming, the last e-mail still stunned me.

To: kmartin87@redroses-net
From: simpsonj@gmail-com
Time: September 24 19:03:50

Kyle

I don't know when or if you will read this, but this is how I feel. It's obvious that the two of us trying to stay a couple half a country apart isn't working. I need to talk to or at least write to my boyfriend regularly.

Since you haven't responded to any of my e-mails in weeks, I no longer consider myself to be your girlfriend. I will be dating others. You should do the same. I will have special memories of nine months we dated. It is best that we find our separate ways in the future.

Good luck

Julie

I stared at the computer screen as I reread the message half a dozen times. We were finished. I hobbled over to my bed and lay down. I grabbed my MP3 player and turned on some tunes. I calmed down some after a half hour. Julie was right. I had been thoughtless to the girl I claimed to love. How could I blame her for this? The two of us had talked about how important it was to communicate. I had focused so exclusively on football and school that I had no time left for my girlfriend.

I was still listening to music when my family came home from church. Mom stopped by my room before she went downstairs to get lunch. Mom asked, "How are you doing, Kyle?"

"All right I guess." I said quietly. Mom knew me too well.

"What's wrong, Kyle? Is the pain too much?"

"No. It doesn't hurt that much, Mom."

"What is wrong then?" Mom asked. "Are you worried about missing football?"

"Not really. I know the doctors can take care of me," I answered. "I'll be back in a few weeks."

Mom sat down on the bed beside me. "What is bothering you, Kyle?"

I knew Mom wouldn't let me alone until I explained about Julie and me. "I got an e-mail from Julie. She is breaking up with me."

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry," Mom hugged me. I hugged her back and tried to draw comfort from her closeness. I explained what had happened between Julie and me. We discussed the difficulties of long distance relationships.

"I know this hurts, honey, but it isn't surprising. Being in a relationship with another person is hard in the best of times. Having a relationship when your partner is somewhere else is difficult, even for grown ups. I know you and Julie loved each other, but the time has come to move on. You need to go on dates like other sixteen year olds, not hang out alone with your friends when they date. You will find someone else eventually."

"I guess, Mom," I answered, hoping she knew what she was talking about.

I followed Mom downstairs for lunch. I stuffed my daypack with my school books and some DVD's. I set myself up in the family room for the afternoon after soup and a sandwich.

Penny came over to visit mid-afternoon. We talked for awhile about my knee. Penny promised to bring me my homework assignments after school tomorrow so I wouldn't fall behind. Penny is a great friend.

I sent Julie this e-mail after dinner. I certainly owed her that.

To: simpsonj@gmail-com
From: kmartin87@redroses-net
Time: October 7 13:21:19

Julie

I understand why you are mad at me, Julie. I wish I could go back in time six weeks and change things. I get too wrapped up in football when the season starts. I did the same thing last season when Penny was my girlfriend.

I'm sorry I ignored you so long. You're right that it will be better if we see other people in the future. If you come back next summer to visit Lancaster County, please take time to see me. Sharing the past nine months of my life with you has been great. I wish things had worked out differently and we could have been together here.

We may not be girlfriend and boyfriend anymore, but I still love you.

Kyle

Mom took off work on Monday to take me to the hospital for the MRI and to the doctors. Even though we had a 10 o'clock appointment, the MRI didn't get done until 10:45. The MRI didn't hurt at all, but you better not mind being in tight places. I was OK. There was more room than there was in the cave our scout troop explored when we went spelunking a couple years ago.

Mom and I went to the mall for lunch to kill some time before we saw the orthopedic surgeon. It felt weird being at the mall in the middle of a school day. The crowd was mostly young mothers with small kids and older retired people.

After lunch Mom drove a couple miles from the mall to the orthopedic center. Mom signed me in and filled out insurance paperwork while I hung out waiting for my turn. I browsed the newspaper while I waited.

A nurse announced, "Kyle Martin."

I headed for the door into the office. Mom followed. The nurse said, "You wait here Mrs. Martin while the doctor conducts the examination. I'll call you in when he is ready to discuss the extent of the injury and the treatment."

Mom asked, "Is that all right, Kyle?"

"No problem Mom. I'll be fine," I answered. I followed the nurse to an exam room.

She said, "Remove your clothes down to your underwear and put on this robe." She handed me one of those short hospital robes. "The doctor will be with you in a few minutes."

I undressed carefully, put on the robe and climbed on the exam table. The doctor took a few minutes to arrive.

The doctor came in. "Good afternoon. You must be Kyle Martin. I'm Doctor High." He extended his hand and we shook.

"Good afternoon, sir."

"Relax, Kyle. I'm going to examine your knee." He started gently feeling my knee. "How did this happen?"

Doctor High continued examining while I explained. "I hurt it playing football. My leg got caught under the pile during a tackle. Two guys landed on me and my leg got bent back at a weird angle. I felt it pop."

"Was this a recreational game or an organized game?"

"I play on the Wolverines varsity team."

"I see. How long have you played football?"

"This is my third season on varsity." I explained.

Doctor High kept asking me questions about myself, things I did. I told him all about scouts and my trips to Algonquin. Doctor High had been a scout as a boy. He thought the trip to Algonquin sounded like fun. He continued feeling and testing my knee while we talked.

Doctor High said, "OK, Kyle. I'm done with the exam. Get dressed. I'm going to have your mother come in. I'll discuss your condition and treatment options with the two of you."

I got dressed and waited for Mom and Doctor High to return. I was sitting on the exam table again when Mom and Doctor High came back to the examining room. Mom had a seat in the chair beside the exam table.

Doctor High said, "I've completed my examination of Kyle's injury. I wish I had better news than this. Kyle has suffered significant damage to three of the four ligaments in his knee." Doctor High held up a skinless model of a knee to show us what was wrong. "The lateral collateral ligament and medial collateral ligament are partially torn." Doctor High pointed to the two ligaments on the inside and outside of the knee model. "These ligaments help give your knee side to side stability. The most significant damage is to this ligament." Doctor High pointed to one of two crossed ligaments inside the knee joint. "This is the anterior cruciate ligament. Kyle, this ligament has torn."

"Is that the pop I heard?" I asked.

"Yes, it was," Doctor High answered.

Mom asked, "What does this mean?"

"Kyle's knee is extremely unstable," Doctor High explained.

"How long will it take for my knee to heal? When can I play football again?" I asked.

Doctor High answered, "I don't think you understand the severity of your injury, Kyle. You may never play football again."

Never? I felt like someone had dropped a ton of stones on me. Never play football again! I stammered, "There has to be something you can do. I have to play football."

Doctor High answered, "There are treatment options. The lateral collateral ligament and medial collateral ligament will heal with rest, elevation and ice in a few weeks. The anterior cruciate ligament or ACL will not heal itself. You have two choices for treatment. The non-surgical option involves rest and rehabilitation exercises. This choice has several distinct advantages. This option is less painful. You knee will heal more quickly and with less pain without surgery. This option has a significant disadvantage. You knee will never be as stable as it was before the injury. You can do every day things, but can't do activities that would stress the knee joint. You wouldn't be able to play contact sports, ski, or play basketball."

I exclaimed, "I don't like that option very much. What is the other choice?"

Doctor High continued, "The other option is surgical replacement of the ligament. I would use a piece of tendon to replace your ACL. Usually the reconstructed ligament will provide nearly complete function to your knee."

"That sounds better. Let's do that," I said.

"You need to know the down side to the surgical option. The ACL replacement procedure is extremely painful. The time to heal is substantially longer than the non-surgical option. This option requires months of difficult rehabilitation. There is no guarantee in the end that you will have full use of your knee when you are done with rehabilitation," Doctor High explained.

Mom asked, "What do you normally recommend?"

"I don't have one answer to this question. For older, less active persons, I generally recommend the non-surgical option. Surgery is indicated for younger, more active persons. Kyle certainly fits in that group. I understand you play football. How serious are you about football, Kyle?"

"Totally! I love football. Let me explain it this way," I answered. "I hope to get an athletic scholarship for college. I had a recruiting visit to Penn State two weeks ago."

"I recommend that Kyle have the ACL replacement surgery," Doctor High said.

Mom asked, "Is that what you want, Kyle?"

"I guess, if that will let me play football again," I replied.

Mom confirmed, "That's what we want, Doctor."

Doctor High explained, "I want to make sure you understand that I can not guarantee that you will be fit to play football again. The rehabilitation program is usually six to eight months long. Hard work will increase the chances of full recovery, but it will not guarantee it."

I asked, "When can I have the surgery?"

Doctor High answered, "Usually I like to do the surgery three or four weeks after the injury. You knee needs time to heal from the injury. You will need to do exercises to increase your range of motion before the surgery. If you can't bend your knee fully before the surgery, you probably won't be able to do it afterwards. Before you go I will have my receptionist schedule you for your first rehabilitation session. Do you have any questions?"

I asked, "Can I drive?"

Doctor High smiled and looked at Mom. "Sixteen year olds. That's always the first question." Doctor High looked back at me. "Is your car an automatic or a manual transmission?"

"Automatic." I replied.

"You can drive as soon as you are able to bend your knee enough to get in and out of the car, Kyle. Do you have any other questions?"

Mom and I didn't have any. Doctor High continued explaining my treatment. "I have a knee brace I want you to wear to protect your knee during the day. Wear it as you go about your normal activities. You can take it off at home in the evening if you are sitting or sleeping. Do not wear it in the shower. Be very careful when you shower without the brace. Do not twist or turn suddenly. Your knee isn't strong enough for that right now. I'll show you how to wear the brace."

Doctor High proceeded to demonstrate how to put on and take off the brace. He had me do it after he showed me. I tried my leg out after I had the brace on. I could put a little weight on it. Doctor High explained, "You need to gradually put more weight on your left leg as it heals. You shouldn't need the crutches for more than a week. The more you use your injured leg, the better condition it will be in when you have the surgery and the better your chances are for a complete recovery. Do you understand?"

"I do," I answered.

Mom and I headed out to see the receptionist. She scheduled me for a rehabilitation session tomorrow morning at 10 o'clock. The surgery was tentatively scheduled for Monday, October 29th. I would visit Doctor High again on the 22nd. I would do rehab once a week until after the surgery.

Mom and I stopped off at the school on the way home. We got there about fifteen minutes before dismissal. Mom went to the office to explain my expected absences with the principal. I headed for the locker room to talk with Coach Caffrey. I arrived at the gym as his last period gym classes was dressing. I met him in his office.

Coach Caffrey asked, "How are you doing, Kyle?"

"I'm surviving. The doctor found that I tore my ACL. I'm going to have surgery to replace it in three weeks. I'm done playing football this season."

"I'm sorry to hear that, Kyle. We're going to miss you."

"Think about what I can do to help the team while I'm injured. I still want to help any way I can."

"I'll think about that, Kyle," Coach Caffrey answered. The dismissal bell rang as he said it. The gym class streamed out the door. I hung around until the line of kids disappeared. I was still there when Ed and Jeremy came in the locker room.

Ed face brightened as soon as he saw me. "Great. You're back. When can you play again?"

Jeremy added, "How bad is it?"

I explained about my ACL and the other injuries to me knee. I explained about the surgery and six to eight month recovery time.

"Shit!" Ed blurted. "What are we going to do without you?"

I replied, "You still have plenty of good receivers. You have Greg, Andy, Karl, Tim and Jason. Drew is good at catching the ball out of the backfield. You'll be fine without me."

"It won't be the same, Kyle," Ed said. "You're the best receiver we have."

"The other guys will step up," I said. "They are good receivers too."

"That's only part of it, Kyle," Ed replied. "You're my best friend. I like having you around."

"I'm still a captain on the team. I'll be around. I just won't be on the field anymore this year." I explained.

"How are you doing Kyle?" Jeremy asked. "This knee injury has to be a shock."

"I'm managing. I don't have a lot of choice really," I answered.

Coach Graham came through the locker rooming shouting, "C'mon ladies. Let's get moving. Hit the field."

Ed asked, "Are you going to scouts tonight?"

My knee ached a little. "No, I don't think so. I need to go home and ice my knee."

Ed replied, "I'll make sure things go properly at the scout meeting. Are you coming to school tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I'll be here most of the day. I have to go for rehabilitation after first period. I'll be back before lunch." I answered.

My friends departed for the practice field to numerous calls of "Good to see you, Kyle" and "See you tomorrow, Kyle."

Mom picked up Liz from the babysitters on the way home. I didn't even have time to hobble inside before Penny came over. She helped me upstairs to my bedroom. I sat on my bed with my left leg up.

"I brought your homework assignments from school today," Penny said brightly. She went over the assignments for Pre-Calculus, Chemistry and English.

I asked, "Do you want to study together tonight?"

"I thought you had scouts," Penny asked.

"My knee hurts too much to go tonight. I'm going to stay home and ice my knee."

"OK. I'll come over after dinner. Talking about your knee, what did the doctor say about it?"

I explained about my torn ACL, about the other damage, and the surgery the doctor had planned for three weeks from now. We agreed to meet again at 7 pm. I iced my knee before dinner.

Mom helped me gather my school books and supplies in the family room. I could put my leg up on the couch while Penny and I studied. Penny arrived right on time. We started with the Pre-calc homework. I was a little surprised when we finished it in forty-five minutes.

Penny went over the Chemistry material next. I had no trouble following the day's work. English was simple. I needed to read a couple chapters in Aldus Huxley's "Brave New World" for class tomorrow.

When we finished Penny said, "Wow, I don't think we ever got done this early. Do you want to hang out for awhile, Kyle?"

"Sure, Penny," I answered. She turned on the TV. She sat down on the couch beside me. She leaned against my shoulder. We watched for a few minutes.

Penny asked, "How are you and Julie doing?"

I stared at Penny. "Didn't I tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

I said, "Julie and I broke up."

"No. When did this happen?"

"I got Julie's e-mail this weekend." I tried to keep my voice from catching when I said.

Penny hugged me. "I'm so sorry, Kyle. You've had a really horrible weekend!"

I wrapped my arms around Penny and closed my eyes. Things I was sure about last week were all in doubt. Would I play football again? How would I find a girl as good as Julie? I sighed. "It's been..." I gulped. " ... hard. The doctor says... [sigh] ... I might not ... play football again."

Penny rubbed my back. "Things will work out. You have lots of friends. We'll help you though this, Kyle." Her closeness gave me a comfort I hadn't felt in days. We held each other for a couple minutes.

Finally I managed to compose myself again. "Thanks for being here, Penny." I gave her a kiss on her cheek.

"I'm just trying to be a good friend, Kyle." She gave me a final hug. "I probably should get home. I'll see you at school tomorrow."

I stopped by the Art room before classes started on Tuesday to let Miss Levering know I would be missing class today for physical therapy. Penny was going to let Mr. Witman know about me missing his class.

Mom picked me up at the office after I was finished with Deutsch after first period. We headed west for Lancaster the Orthopedic Center. Mom and I met my therapist, Matthew Horn. He was in his early thirties. He preferred that I call him Matt, not Mr. Horn.

Matt taught me four exercises he wanted me to do every day. He showed me the knee extension, the quad set, the heel slide and the leg lift. I laid down on a mat for the knee extension and put my left foot on a three inch high pad. This extended my knee just a little more than was comfortable. The quad set involved tightening my quad muscle and holding it for ten seconds. I repeated this ten times.

The heel slide was the one that really hurt. I had my left foot flat on the floor. I had to slide my foot, bending my injured knee as far as possible. I stopped when my knee felt tight. Matt said, "Keep going, Kyle. It should hurt. Push yourself until it is uncomfortable. This exercise will help your recovery." I slid my heel a little closer to my torso until it hurt.

Matt said, "That's good, Kyle. Do that nine more times." I worked my knee nine more times, trying to increase the flex in my knee.

We finished with the leg lifts. They weren't too hard. Matt helped me up off the mat after I put my brace back on. Matt talked about how I should do these exercises every day until I had surgery. My aim was to keep the muscle tone in my quads and to increase the flexibility in my knee so I could bend to 90 degrees.

I was scheduled for two more physical therapy sessions before my surgery, at 10 am on the 15th and the 22nd. Mom drove me back to the high school. I checked in at the office, got a hall pass and headed for my Modern European History class. I was about ten minutes late for the start of class. The rest of the school day went smoothly.

After school was over I headed for the locker room and Coach Caffrey office. He was a little surprised to see me. I asked, "What do you want me to help with today?"

"I hadn't really come up with anything, Kyle. I'm sorry," Coach Caffrey answered.

"I was thinking, would it help if I took the videos from our future opponents and broke down the plays and prepared reports on them? What do you think, Coach?"

"Hmmm ... that could be helpful. Have you done that before, Kyle?" Coach asked.

"Sure. That's what we do on Thursdays over the winter," I replied. "I wouldn't have any problem with it."

"OK, Kyle. I'll get you the video we have for Eastern. We play them in two weeks. I'm done with video from Norlanco already."

"I figured that. You have the game plan done for them already. I presume you started practicing for them yesterday."

"We did," Coach Caffrey said. "We have four days to get ready for Friday night. I'll get Coach Baer to set you up in the conference room with the videos."

"Thanks, Coach." I hobbled to the conference room. Justin brought the videos in and set me up. I cataloged every play for score, yard marker, down and distance. All the information went into a laptop Coach Caffrey used for this information. I spent the entire practice working on this. I managed to finish the videos on Eastern by the time my teammates came in from practice. Andy and I caught a ride home with Greg.

Penny came over after dinner to work on homework together. We spent half the night on it. I was caught up with my Pre-calc homework when we were done. We finished Chemistry and English before Penny went home.

My leg got better every day. I went to my classes during the school day. I broke down plays on our opponent's videos during football practice. Penny came over in the evenings to help with homework. I did my rehab exercises on my knee while Ed and Andy trained in the basement in the evening.

By Friday I didn't need the crutches during school. My knee could take my weight, but I still limped a little. I wore my jersey even though I wasn't going to play. Greg, Ed and George insisted that I had too.

My teammates and I gathered after dinner to prepare for our game with Norlanco. I brought a camp chair along so I had somewhere to sit while I watched from the sideline. I knew I couldn't stand for almost three hours during the game.

I was hanging out with Ed and Andy while they dressed for the game. I asked Andy, "Do you remember the interception Trent caught in front of you last week?"

"Yes," Andy answered.

"I meant to talk to you sooner than now. Do you know why Trent made that interception?"

"No."

"You gave away the pass route to Trent." I explained. "You moved like this before you expected the pass." I demonstrated what Andy had done. "Right?"

"OK Kyle. What should I have done?" Andy asked.

I demonstrated what I wanted him to do. "You see the difference, Andy? Doing it my way keeps the DB thinking you're going outside. He's surprised when you turn at the last second and catch the ball inside of him."

"I think I get it, Kyle."

"Because of the way you moved Trent knew the route was inside. He jumped the pass before it got to you. If you keep the DB in doubt you make that play a completion instead of an interception."

"OK."

"You need to keep studying, Andy. The team is counting on you to take my place for the rest of the season. You need to get better."

Andy answered, "I'll do my best, Kyle."

"I'll help you as much as I can, Andy. I know you'll do a good job," I replied.

Coach Caffrey came through the locker room commanding, "Everyone line up outside. It's time to get started." The team filed out the door towards the field. I picked up my chair and followed the crowd.

Justin said, "Hey, Kyle. Leave your chair behind. Coach Caffrey thought you might like to join Coach Fisher, Coach Rodgers and me in the press box. You get a great view of the game from up there."

I left my chair behind. "Thanks, Justin," I said as I followed the coaches to the steps to the press box. Our press box was split into three rooms. Two small rooms on each end were for the assistant coaches. The large center room was for our announcer and any press who came to watch the game. Tonight there were two reporters from local papers joining the two reporters for the school paper, the announcer and his assistant and the team camera crew.

Justin was right about the view from the press box. I could see every bit of the field. Justin, Coach Rodgers and Coach Fisher put on headphones so they could talk with Coach Caffrey, Coach Graham and Coach Wyndham on the sidelines.

Coach Caffrey's plan for the evening was to use our spread offense and three wide receivers extensively. Norlanco had two rookie tenth graders playing cornerback. We didn't expect them to be able to cover our wide receivers. We weren't wrong.

Ed and the offense exploded. Greg caught three touchdowns in the first half. Andy and Drew had two each. The score was 49-0 at half time. Coach Caffrey pulled the first string at half time.

Jake Kring and the second team played ball control in the second half. Marcus ran the ball most of the second half. He scored touchdowns twice when we ran out of room on the field to kill the clock. Tim Showalter added another touchdown on a third and long play when the cornerback fell down. This was only Tim's second touchdown in three years on varsity. He had caught his first two years ago when he and I had started varsity. The final score was 70-10. It was the most complete blow-out in our high school's nearly fifty year history.