Chapter 1

"I'm free for dinner tonight. I'm free for dessert as well."

Her tone was suggestive. Her body was seductive and her face was captivating, with that tight skin, made possible by exposing it to the elements only infrequently for her twenty-four years.

She was charming, friendly and sexy. Under other circumstances, I would have been out of my chair before she finished her second sentence.

"You know I'm a married man."

"That isn't fatal, is it?"

And she had a sense of humor. But she worked for me and that could be fatal. Eventually another employee would figure out what was going on and some time after that all the employees would know about it. Some time later my wife would know. That wasn't how I wanted to end it.

"Go home, have a life."

"Your loss," she said.

"But first, let's have a hug." I wiggled the fingers of both hands in the "come here" gesture.

"You're just a dirty old man at heart."

"I'm just showing my affection and appreciation for a valued employee."

"Sure you are."

She joked about it, but she would have been offended if I hadn't requested it.

I was telling the truth, just not the whole truth.

She was the fourth woman I had hugged today. Traces of her perfume mixed with those of the others. I became a touchy-feely person because I truly believe it enhances both personal and business relationships. I'm well known for that.

It also leaves me with such a mixed bouquet of women's scents that it would be absolutely inconceivable for it to arouse in my wife even the slightest suspicion that I had been inappropriate with another woman; just background noise.

I picked up the phone and called Linda.

It's funny how these things work out.

I had a desperate crush on Linda when I was thirteen. Unfortunately, it was unrequited. By the time she requited it, I had moved on.

Eventually, she moved on too. But the intensity we felt for each other, young though we were, somehow deepened our friendship. I was there for her when she dumped her creep of a husband, who was running around on her.

To make my whole connection with Linda even stranger, she had decided to take advantage of her natural talents as a matchmaker; she started a dating service where she got to know the people, which gave her an advantage over other services. She was very successful using her instincts about how people made connections and even offered dating advice when she sensed there was a problem with how one of her clients presented himself or herself.

Linda also did background checks on her clients to assure they did not misrepresent themselves to other clients. She usually called me for those services.

"Hey, Randy. Is this just a social call?" she asked.

"It is social, but I suppose not in the way you meant it. Do you have anything for me?"

"As a matter of fact, I do. Of course, you know this comes with nothing remotely resembling a guarantee.

"I'm doing this because I'm your friend. But it's so unusual I don't even know if it's possible. The honesty you display about your dishonesty could really get in the way of getting somebody to trust you, not to mention that you lie about your financial situation. But, I understand where you're coming from."

"Geez, every time a lecture." But I knew it was not inappropriate.

"You may know what you're doing, but it sounds crazy to me. Anyway, her name is Karen Sugarman and you have a reservation at The Rose Tattoo at 7:30.

"I have to compliment you on that choice, by the way. It isn't cheap, but it definitely doesn't give the impression that you can afford to go anywhere you want. You're a devious man."

"I'd thank you, but I know it's not really a compliment and I'm only as devious as I feel I need to be. I do thank you, however, for everything you've done to help me."

"Don't mention it and I mean that literally. Don't tell anyone. It wouldn't exactly enhance my reputation."

When times are difficult, it's good to have friends.

I called home to tell my wife I had to meet a new client. I don't know if she believed it, but she accepted it. Most of the time when I called to tell her I had to meet a client, it was because I had to meet a client.

I reviewed some cases and packed up to leave. I didn't want to be late. Karen already knew from her conversation with Linda that I was deceitful; I certainly didn't want her to think I wasn't trustworthy.

I was pleased to find I made it five minutes early, but Karen had beaten me there and was seated. She wore a simple, dark blue dress that ended somewhere around her knees, I couldn't tell exactly where because she was seated. Karen had dark hair and was slim, but what I liked best was her smile.

She extended her hand rather than get up and I shook it firmly but without too much pressure. "Nice to meet you," she said.

"Nice to meet you too. Linda didn't tell me you were so beautiful."

She blushed. I liked that.

"So that wasn't a requirement?"

"A bonus; but not a requirement."

"I I, this is really unusual." She momentarily scrunched up her face. "I'm not sure, what to do."

"It's just like a blind date, except that you know a lot about me."

"And you're married," she noted.

"Yes."

"You've done this before, I take it?"

"Yes, it just hasn't worked out."

"Can I ask why you want to meet someone this way instead of someplace people normally meet?"

"Why don't we order first, then I'll answer any questions you have and talk about whatever you want to talk about?"

We looked at our menus, gave the waitress, Tara, our order, and I answered her question.

"I'm not looking to take you somewhere tonight and have my way with you. I'm looking to start a serious, long-term relationship with someone.

"I took a practical approach to a problem and asked my friend Linda to help me out. Very few women are going to even have an interest in talking about this kind of situation. And a fair percentage of those that will, are drawn to married men so they can avoid commitment.

"I'm looking for commitment."

Karen laughed nervously.

"Why don't you just get a divorce and look for a normal woman, not that I'm not normal. You realize this isn't an easy conversation." Her tone reflected discomfort.

"If our relationship reaches a point where it has the potential to get serious, I'll tell you everything. I know this is going to sound silly, but I don't know you well enough and it's too personal to talk about under these circumstances."

This time she just laughed.

"It does sound silly. But I don't jump to the end of a novel so I'll know what's coming while I read all the good parts; I think I have the patience to wait to find out where the plot takes us."

"Nice analogy. Linda said you were very bright." Dinner arrived and conversation slowed, though it didn't end.

"Don't you worry about your wife catching you?" she asked. "This is a very public place. You're out on a week night instead of at home with your family. It seems risky."

"What would I be caught at? Who are you? You could be a client, a potential employee, a contact I hope can provide business in the future. You could be a colleague and we're sharing war stories, or a vendor with an interesting product.

"This is a very public place and I'm out on a week night. What could possibly look more innocent? There was no passionate kiss, just a handshake."

Karen would need a lot more questions answered so I let her take it at her own pace. I commented on how good the food was and she agreed.

"Do you have it all planned out like this, meeting publicly to avoid suspicion? Is everything so calculating?" she asked.

"I hope so. I'm certainly not planning on getting caught."

"I'd like some coffee if you see the waitress."

I nodded. "Tara. I wonder if it's her stage name."

"So what do you see for," she shrugged as if she didn't know how to describe it, "the other woman?"

"Ah. Let me make it easier by talking about you as if you were the other woman.

"In a fairy-tale world, we would get to know and like each other. From that would develop mutual respect and trust and we would grow to love each other. We'd get married, have a family and live happily ever after; the end.

"But I don't have any plans to divorce my wife until the kids are grown. That pretty much puts a damper on the marriage thing, even if we were in Utah.

"So, my second choice is that we live as if we were married, except I'd have a previous family I'd have to spend a lot of my time with. I'd devote as much of my time and interest to you and our kids as I possibly could. And of course, I'd be completely faithful to you, except for my legal wife. I can't avoid that without arousing some suspicion.

"I'll sign a contract that gives you rights as close to legal marriage as possible. And when I get divorced, I'll promptly marry you."

"How could I possibly resist such a romantic offer?"

Karen didn't exactly laugh, but she was obviously amused.

"Regular or decaf?"

"Regular."

I had our Tara's eye and held my thumb and index finger together as if daintily holding a coffee cup. Then I held up one finger.

"You don't fool around on your wife at all?"

"Given what we're talking about, it would be pretty silly to deny it, but only when absolutely necessary."

"So why should I trust you?"

"Because I give you my word."

"Didn't you promise that to her?"

"It's a complicated situation. I'll get into that when we're nearing the point where moving forward puts you at risk of being hurt. Then you'll know enough to decide whether you can trust me or not.

"Look, I know I've displayed sneaky and dishonest behavior. I've even been called upon to lie. But I'm confident that I'll be able to show you that I'm completely trustworthy."

"You've given me a pile of contradictions that don't seem to make any sense. A slightly more cynical woman would just say you're full of shit," said Karen.

"Yes."

"Thank you," she said, not to me but to Tara, who brought her coffee. Karen added one sugar and took a sip.

"Good coffee. Linda told me you aren't crazy and you absolutely wouldn't try to con me so, for the time being, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt that there is actually some sense behind this confusion."

"Thank you."

"But, I've got maybe just a question or two."

I smiled. That didn't require an answer.

"Why don't you just get divorced?" Karen raised her hand in a stop gesture and tilted her head.

"I know, you'll tell me later. Why do want a second family now? Why don't you just wait until you're divorced?"

"I'm thirty-four. The youngest child is three. When he graduates high school I'll be forty nine. If I got married immediately after that and had a child quickly, I'd be sixty-eight when he or she graduated high school.

"That's awfully old to start a new family and it's awfully old to try to connect to a young child. I'll be Daddy when everyone else my age will be grandpa. I'm not sure that's a good situation in which to raise a child.

"Starting a new family at thirty four or thirty five, however, is not unusual. Other parents will be in that age group. I won't be an old guy when they head off to college."

"I can understand that." She took another sip.

I would have to remember to ask her whether she was using the coffee to give her a chance to think about what I said and how to get the answers she needed with follow up questions or whether, in this case, a cigar was just a cigar.

"You already have that family," she said. "Why do you need another?"

"Good. You ask the tough questions. I'll talk about the problems that led to this later. But what I've been expressing is my, solution, to the problems.

"I came to the decision that I deserve to have this family I want at a time in my life when I'm young enough to enjoy it and able to best support and nurture it.