The Smith twins are at the shore. It’s so hot! While one of them looks for shells, the other investigates the lighthouse. She’s wondering if she can get in, if she can climb to the top and enjoy the view. She thinks it might be cooler up there.

She’s just about to try the door when two guys appear. They look stern.

“Um, isn’t this a clothing optional beach?” she asks.

“It could be,” one of them says.

“When in Rome,” the other says, lowering his shorts.

“Before we get started,” she says, “can we wait for my twin? Share and share alike is our motto.”

“No problem,” one of the guys says. “I’m Zander and this is Alexander.”

Once together, they enjoy each other every which way.

Until at last the boys are all but extinguished.

Later at the gift shop after saying goodbye to the boys, they buy a souvenir lighthouse lamp.

“It’s nice,” they agree that evening, “but not as splendidly phallic as those lighthouse boys.”

“Who do you think was more lighthouse like? Zander or Alexander?”

“Good question. Remind me which was who. Or is it who was which?”

They laugh, and in the light of the lighthouse lamp they sixty-nine until they fall asleep.