Chapter 1

Bob Connors is a smart kid. He makes straight A's, has a 4.0 grade average, and will be Valedictorian of our class in three months. He's a writer on the year book, writes an advice column for the school paper, and is a marvelous actor and singer. He runs a volunteer program called Adopt a Grandparent, where kids between the ages of 15 and 18 volunteer to be grandchildren at the two nursing homes and the assisted living home in town. He also does some sort of fund drive for Jerry Lewis's Kids each year. Of course, being human, he has his flaws like the rest of us. One of those flaws is about to drive me up the wall. I'm in love with him and he's absolutely clueless.

My name is Maggie Connors and I'm in Bob's class. I'm named after my grandmother Margaret Felicity Connors, who happens to be Bob's mother. It's not quite as kinky as it sounds, though it can be a bit of an eyebrow raiser when people discover that Bob is my flesh and blood uncle. His oldest brother Leldon Connors is my dad who happens to be older than him by twenty years and Bob and I were conceived and then born at almost the same time. Bob was born in May and is two days older than me. He was the last bundle of joy while I was the first bundle of joy. My parents had two more girls and three boys after me. We're expecting another not long after Bob and I graduate.

Girls have always streamed around Bob like flies to honey. With his naturally curly brown hair, blue-green eyes, rugged good looks, and charm -- not to mention the brains and other things I've already mentioned, girls have never stood a chance. Of course, not all girls flock to him. After all, not every girl has the same taste in men, but he still has a pond full to pick from when he so desires. And he has desired, though not enough times in the opinions of the girls who have gotten left out. From what I've heard, they were dreaming harem and kids all over the place. Unfortunately, for them, Bob has a monogamous mind-set and only one girl at a time has ever been the center of his attentions.

His last relationship ended two months ago when Katie Wilson, the female version of Bob, spiked his Dr. Pepper while he was at her house one afternoon. This had resulted with Bob waking up with not only Katie in bed with him, but two of her cousins, too. For some reason Katie thought he would appreciate her liberating him sexually. Instead, Bob read her the riot act, broke up with her on the spot and then went to the doctor to get tested out in case there had been any unknown disease spread around.

Katie had argued that she had kept in the family to which my uncle responded, "It doesn't matter that things were within the family. I feel violated because there was no consent on my part. I have never wanted to have sex with more than one girl at a time."