Chapter 16

Monday morning got started with a bang. Bill was waiting for me when I got to his block. I had already walked Kate to school, and when I turned onto Sycamore, I saw Bill standing on his corner, waiting for me. I was going to tell him something about staying away from Kate, but he jumped me before I even got a chance to say anything to him. He tackled me right there on the sidewalk, and then he just kept punching me, even after I told him I gave up.

I'd never seen him so mad. It was only when he started yelling at me to stay away from Eileen, that I even knew why he was doing that to me. It was hard trying to get him to quit hitting me, and trying to talk with him at the same time. The more he hit me, the more upset he seemed to get. I don't know how much longer he would have kept pounding on me if some guy hadn't stopped his car in the street, and run over and dragged Bill off of me.

My shirt was ripped, and my hand and the side of my face had gotten scraped up from the sidewalk. Bill didn't have any marks on him. I hadn't even hit him once. I hadn't even tried to hit him though. Even after the guy pulled him off me and held him there, I didn't feel that mad with him. I felt bad that our friendship was over though. I turned around to go home and get into some clothes that weren't ripped, and didn't have any blood on them. When I was done with changing my clothes, and had a chance to examine the damage in the mirror, I decided not to go to school anyway. I wasn't hurt that bad, I just didn't feel like facing people, and getting asked a million questions about what had happened.

That night I had a difficult time explaining why Bill had beaten me up, and why I didn't want to go to school. My parents reacted just like I figured they would. It was Kate who surprised me with her reaction.

"I'll never speak to Bill again, Larry, not as long as I live."

"This wasn't about you, Kate. He did it because I gave Eileen a ride home on my bike."

"That doesn't matter. He hit you, that's what matters. You've been his friend for so long, and then he beats you up without telling you anything first? That isn't right."

"Are you confusing Bill with Clara?"

"No, why would you even say that? Clara has a right to be mad at me. Bill didn't have any right, and he should have talked to you anyway, not hit you. He was being a bully."

I didn't know what I thought. It seemed so easy for Kate to pick one side in this, even when it wasn't so simple, or that clear cut. I understood why Bill had done what he did. I thought he was wrong to do it like that, but I understood. Our friendship had been under strain and stress ever since my birthday party. Both of us had felt it. At some point, we had each become threats to the other. Eileen had only been the one that had brought it all to a head. It could have just as easily been Kate, or even Jane. It had been about all of them, and more. I wondered if Bill had felt as trapped by all that had happened as I had.

On Tuesday, Bill was absent from school. Tuesday night, Eileen called me from Bill's house. She told me that she had just heard about what happened that day in school. She wanted me to know that she hadn't spoken to Bill before he attacked me.

"Larry, I hope you aren't mad at me for any of this?"

"I'm not mad at anyone, not even Bill. It was going to happen anyway probably. I'm sorry that it did happen, but not surprised by it."

"Bill asked me to call you, Larry. He wants to talk to you. Can I put him on?"

"I don't know. What does he want to talk about?"

"You have to ask him. He just asked me to call you."

"All right, put him on."

"Larry? I'm sorry that I beat you up. You aren't hurt bad are you?"

"No, I'm all right."

"When you didn't come to school on Monday, I felt bad. I didn't even mean to fight with you."

"What happened then? I mean, I'm walking across the street to join you, so we can walk to school together, and the next thing you're beating on me even after I said 'give'."

"I told you why I was doing it."

"Because of Eileen? Because I rode her home on my bike?"

"That and some other stuff. What you said about Jane, and the way you've been about Kate and I."

"Wouldn't it have been easier just to tell me you didn't want to be friends with me anymore?"

"I know. I wish I'd done it that way too. I'm sorry for beating you up, and I don't want to be friends with you anymore."

"I'm sorry you beat me up too, Bill. This seems like a lousy way to end our friendship, but I guess I agree with you too. So long."

There is a finality about losing a best friend like that. As much as you might have wanted that too, it still hurts you. I went into my room. It wasn't even eight thirty, but my homework was done and I felt like going to bed early. In my head, I reviewed all of the missteps that either Bill or I had made to first endanger, and then ruin our friendship. I didn't cry, but I wanted to. My mom came into my room before she turned in for the night, and she sat on the edge of my bed, using her hand to push my hair away from my eyes. She knew how bad I felt, I could tell.

"Laurant, don't you worry about this. When you are young everything seems so very important. When you get older, you will see that this was all for the best."

I had no idea what she was talking about. It was the same thing I heard her say at a funeral once, to the woman whose husband was being buried. My mother told the woman that what had happened was all for the best. I'll never forget the look that woman gave my mother. I think there was something in her religion that she was thinking about when she said that. It was a stupid thing to say, but I think she meant well.

Wednesday, Bill and I were both in school. We pretty much tried to ignore each other. Karen and Denise seemed to be acting the same way as Bill and I were. I asked Karen about it at lunchtime.

"I heard about you and Denise at the movies, and later at her house. I thought you liked me?"

"I do like you. Who says I don't?"

"You don't act like it. Denise didn't help either, throwing herself at you like that."

"I told Denise, and I'm telling you. I'm not going to talk about any of that. If you have a problem with me, over what I did with you, I'll discuss it. I'm not going to talk about any problems that you and Denise have though, or what Denise and I might have done."

"Oh, don't worry. Denise already told me everything about it. She even accused me of letting you touch me down there, claiming that was why she let you."

"I'm not going to say anything about her, and I didn't say anything about you. You two are just in some kind of silly competition that isn't good for anyone."

"I'm not in competition, not with her or with anyone else. She might be, but I'm definitely not."

"I'm not either. I guess you don't want to go out with me anymore, then?"

"What do you mean? I never said that. Is that what you thought I was saying. It isn't."

"Why don't I walk you home after school, and we can talk about it more on the way?"

"Denise isn't going to like it."

"I'll meet you out in front of school when the last bell rings."

In sixth period, Denise came up to me to ask if it was true that Karen and I were going steady. I told her that I wasn't going steady with anyone. After school, Karen was pretty quiet when we first began walking towards her house.

"Was it you who told Denise that you and I were going steady?"

"I just did it to get back at her, and to see what she would do. I know she likes you too, but I hope you like me better."

"I like you both. I don't want to go steady with anyone though. I don't like the way you and Denise are competing about this."

"About you, you mean?"

"I'm not a dog bone."

"Are you saying that Denise and I are both dogs?"

"No, I'm saying we don't all have to fight about who is going out with who, and what one of you is willing to do with me."

"That's good, because I'm not like Denise."

"I didn't say either of you were like the other one. I thought this whole dating thing was supposed to be people having fun together. Ever since it began, I've been losing friends, getting beaten up, and having people get mad at me, for all kinds of things. Where is the fun in all that?"

"I thought we had fun up in the balcony, Larry. And when we were walking home too. You didn't think that we had fun?"

"Yes, that was fun. It's just all the other stuff that seems to go with it. When we first went out, you and Denise were good friends. Part of it was that you started telling Denise what we were doing. Maybe that led to some of the the hard feelings?"

"She did way more than I did. She didn't have to tell me either, but she did."

"That's what I'm talking about. It is all that talking that causes the problems. There are some things that are better not to talk about with your friends."

"Well, it's too late now. Denise isn't my friend anymore."

"That doesn't make me feel better, Karen. It makes me feel worse. Now I feel guilty, and I didn't mean to do anything to make you two get into a fight."

"It wasn't all about you, Larry. Denise has this attitude that she is better than other people. When you point out to her the things she does that aren't better, she gets all upset about it."