Chapter 1

"What is your fondest wish?" nurse Woe said to me. Here I was lying in the CICU bed dying from my fourth massive heart attack, in as many months. She was probably talking about giving me a blowjob or something along those lines. I did have a reputation for being a flirt on the floor. This was my fourth trip here in three months, damned heart attacks. This time the doctor said that there was little hope. Eighty-five percent of my heart was dead, and if I survived the night I would have to spend the rest of what looked to be a short life in a nursing home. Personally, I hoped I didn't make it through the night. I used to work in a nursing home, at one point in my life. Not a bad place to work, mind you, but I didn't want to live there.

Nurse Woe asked me yet again "What is your fondest wish?" I figured it was just part of the game she was playing with me. You know, to get me to say something funny. I would normally do something like that. But I was really down at the moment, thinking about my life and all the mistakes I made. But there was something in the way she was looking at me that prompted me to tell her the truth. So I told her.

"To correct the mistakes in my life."

Nurse Woe then asked me "How much of your life?"

There was a sharp pain in my chest again! Damn it, that hurt! The monitor was telling the story of what was happening, and the news was extremely bad.

But I got out "The whole thing."

Ok I was having my last heart attack, and trying to be funny about my wish. Ha, see what I get for 65 years of life, making jokes at the end of it.

Nurse Woe said, "Very well. That is a new one on me. Your wish is granted."

My body arched in pain, as the rest of my heart died. I heard the monitor begin to give off the sound of a flat line. My eyes were open, and the pain suddenly stopped. Not what I thought it would be like. Just then, everything faded to black, as I finally died.

I awoke.

'Well, this is odd, ' I thought.

There was no light but I could here the sound of a heart beating. I then felt like I was being squeezed to death. What the heck is going on here? Ah, it was a tunnel! There was the bright light at the end. It was bright all right. It was absolutely blinding. My body was squeezed yet again. I felt as though I was going through an old-fashioned washtub's ringer/squeezer. Well that's what went through my mind. My body moved forward as I went head first, out of the tunnel. My mind was racing, and I began to wonder what the gates of Heaven were going to look like. I imagined that I was about to look into the face of God.

I then heard someone say, "Push again."

Once more the lower part of my body felt like it was being crushed, and pushed through the ringer. Then suddenly, all the pressure stopped. Something grabbed my legs and effortlessly lifted me into the air. I felt the hand of God strike my ass. I cried out as loud as I could. Ok, I may not have been the best of people in life, but for heaven's sake, I didn't expect to be spanked as I was being held upside down in midair. Then a hand came under my head and shoulders, and someone was holding me.

I heard a male voice say, "Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy."

'Ok, ' I thought. 'I should have paid more attention to the theory of reincarnation. Looks like I am going to get my chance to be a better person in another life. I opened my eyes as I was laid in my new mother's arms. I closed them again; really, really quickly! It was way too bright. I did get a glimpse of a woman that looked just like my mother when I was younger. Damn, my mind thought, I wonder what this means.

Then I heard her say, "Hello, little Timmy."

That's when it suddenly dawned upon me! This was my mom, my original mom! That's my real name, but how could this have happened, I asked myself?

Then it came back to me. Nurse Woe had said my wish was granted. I had been too distracted by the pain, not to mention that I was not taking her question seriously. I had previously thought it was something that she was doing, to distract me from my upcoming death.

Then a nurse took me from my mother's arms and said to my mom, "Time to clean him up, I will bring him to your room as soon as they get you settled in."

I was whisked off to be washed, poked, prodded, and foot printed for identification purposes. As I was lying there trying to looking around, I opened my eyes wide. I saw Nurse Woe standing nearby.

'What is going on here?' went through my mind.

That's when she spoke, saying, "Sorry, Tim. You passed away faster then I thought you would. I didn't get a chance to tell you the rules."

I opened my mouth, but only an angry cry came out.

'Shit' I thought 'I am really going to get to live my life over again, ALL of it.'

Nurse Woe continued, "You can change anything about your life that you want to; but you can never tell anyone what has happened to you. If you do tell, your wish will be cancelled, and you will return to your dying 65 year old body." She smiled and added, "Oh, yes. You will have to learn to talk, and walk, and everything, all over again. But take it slowly. You don't want to shock everyone, back here in 1960."

Then she disappeared; she was gone, just that quickly.

'What the fuck' I thought 'if I had known the wish was for real I would have said since I was nine. After all that's when life started to go down hill. Fourth grade was the starting point of my problems. Now what does this mean? Drats! Doing everything all over again! Shit! I had hated school in the first place, and now I have to do it again.'

That's when it really hit me. I was going to get to live my whole life, all over again!

Damn! Am I glad I didn't ask for something stupid like a blowjob or ten million dollars or something asinine like that. Another revelation hit me just then. I could earn the ten million dollars, before I even got out of high school. Well, that was going to take some work. Then again, I reminded myself, I have years to plan my actions; and to make plans for the future. While I was ruminating on these thoughts, I was also remembering how much I liked being held at this age. Odd that I had forgotten that.

I couldn't really do anything at this age, as far as my future plans were concerned. As far as being held, I enjoyed that when I was 65. So now I was going to seriously enjoy it, and contrive to get as much of it as I could.

Let's see, what else can a newborn baby do? Oh yeah, cry when I am hungry or wet, and of course when I didn't feel right. Of course it worked. When I did cry, someone was bound to pick me up, and just hold me.

As it turned out, I didn't have to cry to be held. I was constantly being smothered with affection from both of my parents in addition to my grandparents. Anyway... Let's see, my first words were "Dada." Corny I know, but what did you expect? I had to hold it in until I was 5 months old. Oddly, that it didn't seem like it was all that long. Then again, why would it? I was used to time passing in the way it does when you're 65. It just seems like yesterday; but when you stop and think, you realize it happened over ten years ago.

I did meet my great-great aunt. It was funny to me, that she really did say that this little one was going to grow up to be President. Hey, I remember growing up thinking I was going to be president, when did that change? Oh, yeah. The scandals of my first wife: doing what she had done, and accused me of even worse. And then the fears of my second wife, which kept me from pursuing a career in politics.

'My God, ' I thought, 'None of that has happened yet. In fact it will not happen, because I will not have anything to do with either one of them!'

I had been so in lust with the first one that I was blind. My second wife was a 'rebound wife', although she did last for seventeen years. But no, I would not marry her again.