Chapter 2

The next day, Trina went out of her way to be friendly to Zoe, even going so far as to invite her to sit at her table -- where the 'in' crowd ate lunch. Zoe refused, politely, and slipped away to her usual lunchtime haunt, an area behind the school which was technically off-limits. A few minutes later, she saw Trina heading in her direction, carrying two lunches.

"You aren't stupid, so don't act like it," Trina said, holding out one of the lunches as if daring Zoe to refuse.

Zoe stiffened. "Did you consider the possibility that I might be on a diet? Thanks for the thought, but I prefer to avoid temptation."

Trina's eyes narrowed, and she glared at Zoe. "I'm not stupid either, dammit. It's not fucking charity, so deal."

"Then what do you want for it?" Zoe asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Nothing," Trina said. "There's a difference between charity and doing something to be nice to someone, you know."

"No, there's not," Zoe snorted. "Or there shouldn't be, anyway."

"Oh?" Trina raised a skeptical eyebrow. "C'mon. From what I've seen, 'charity' is usually someone trying to make themself feel better by doing something for an 'unfortunate'."

"Exactly. And like I said, it shouldn't be."

"Maybe not, but it's what most people mean by 'charity', and it's what you assumed I was doing, wasn't it?" Trina asked.

Zoe gave her a tiny quirk of a smile. "Maybe. Wasn't it?"

"Nope." Trina held out the bag. "So take it before I get mad."

Zoe sighed and took it. "Okay, but it's just a small debt. Not something I asked for, or couldn't do without."

Trina shook her head. "It's not a debt. It's just me being my usual fabulous self."

Zoe laughed, short and abrupt. "Everything has a price. Every action ... or lack of one ... has a cost or a reward. An ethical person recognizes that, and does her best to maintain balance."

"Maybe so," Trina said, tilting her head. "But maybe I'm just balancing out my own karma, so you don't owe me anything."

Zoe shook her head. "It doesn't work that way. If I accept the reward, then I owe the debt. Doesn't matter if you're an axe-murderer trying to work off your sins. You get a credit, I get a debit, even if you're in the red to start with."

Trina straddled the bench next to Zoe, facing her. "So you think life is a zero-sum game?" she asked, opening up her bag.

Zoe leaned back against the trunk of the tree behind her, lighting a cigarette as she peeked into the bag. Pulling out a carton of milk, she said, "At best."

Trina shook her head. "I think you're wrong. I think in the end it's a positive-sum game. In the short run it might be zero-sum, or even negative-sum, but in the long run it's positive-sum."

"Hah. Yeah, right," Zoe said. "Maybe for some people. A very few people. But not for most. They live, they try, they suffer, then they die."

"Oh?" Trina asked. "You think most people's lives are unadulterated misery? Or do you only see success in monetary terms?"

Zoe shrugged. "Not unadulterated. There's enough good to keep they trying. It doesn't take much. Intermittent reinforcement is the most powerful behavioral motivator. Look at all the people with gambling problems."

"True. But I don't think that, on the balance, people's lives are pure misery. Some people have it better than others -- like me -- and some people have it worse, like you. But for most people, it comes out positive, and even for people like you and me, it might not come out the way we expect. I mean, how many stories do you see in the news about this rich girl or that rich girl going into rehab, or getting busted for possession, or having an eating disorder?" Trina asked.

"You don't get it," Zoe said. "You're not guaranteed to have it any better than me. Yeah, you've got a different set of possibilities. But it doesn't matter, because you've also got a different set of liabilities. Right now, things might be going your way, but that doesn't mean they always will, and it definitely doesn't prepare you for when they won't, and it'll be worse for you than for me because of that. Because at least I don't expect it to be any different."

Trina nodded. "That's my point. Maybe life's great for me right nor, and maybe it sucks for you right now, but at the end of our lives, who's to say you won't be the happier of the two of us, overall? And chances are that both of our lives will be more good than bad, and even if not, next time around we get to try again, with a different starting position."