Chapter 47

Mark caught Kristen and cradled her to his chest, worriedly examining the damaged link. As far as he could tell, it hadn't taken on any more damage, and didn't seem to be draining her any faster. He needed to get her away, but he still had some time before she was in any danger. "Wonderful," he said, with a sigh, then looked over at Angie. "I'm not sure what to do at this point. I don't know if I can trust you."

She looked up from her sobbing, her face red and blotchy, and her eyes widened with surprise upon seeing Kristen unconscious in his lap. "Oh God! What happened?!"

He stared at her, considering, judging. "Can I trust you, Angie? To keep something a complete and utter secret? Something that could kill her if it got out?"

"I never wanted to hurt her," she whispered. "I would never endanger her."

"Damn it ... I just don't know if this is a good idea." He sighed. "I really don't. But ... Kayla trusts you. And I don't think you meant to do this to Kristen. She's in pain, actual, physical pain, whenever she sees you, because you sent her away. And being this close to you is ... draining her. Not fast, but it it's doing it."

"I don't understand," she said, shaking her head.

He sighed again. "No, you probably don't. I'm not sure how to explain it, either. If it wasn't for the raw, gaping wound this is causing, I'd think it might just be kinder to leave you ignorant." He stared into space for a moment, then asked, "Are you religious?"

She flinched, looking deeply ashamed. "I always considered myself so."

"Hmm. Do you believe in the idea of, well ... soul-mates?"

"No, not really," she said with a bitter half smile. "Love is something you really have to work to maintain. The whole 'love at first sight, happily ever after' thing is a dangerous myth."

"Mostly, yes," he agreed. "But not always. Sometimes love at first sight does happen. It did for Kristen and me. We still have to work at it, of course. It doesn't stop us from hurting each other ... just like it didn't stop you from hurting her."

She shook her head. "Mark, I can't be in love with her. I just can't."

He smiled. "That's kind of what I said. It didn't help me either."

"You don't understand. I'm married."

"I know," he said. "That's why I said I thought it would be kinder to leave you ignorant. I'm not sure what to do."

"I don't understand any of this," she said. "What's happened to her, why isn't she waking up?"

He closed his eyes again, checking to make sure Kristen was still okay. The small, steady drain continued, but was still not near the dangerous point. He bent and slid a hand behind her knees, then sat down with her on his lap.

He sighed. "This is where I have to decide to trust you," he said, swallowing nervously and hoping like hell he was doing the right thing. "Kristen is ... not entirely human, though she's not a demon or anything like that."

"Wh-what do you mean?"

"She's ... different. With different needs. Do you remember when she got sick a month or so ago?"

She nodded, still confused.

"That happened when she stopped sleeping around," he said.

Angie blinked at him. "Huh?"

"Sex provides ... energy, I guess you would call it, for her," he said. "She need that as much as she needs food or water. Without it..." He shrugged, stroking Kristen's hair.

"She eats sex?!" Angie stared at him, wide-eyed. "You're crazy, too!"

He shook his head. "I'm not. If she wasn't so drained, I could prove it ... and if she gets much more drained, it will be visible." He checked her again. She was still within 'safe' ranges, but she looked exhausted, pale, and sickly.

"You ... she..." Angie stammered, trembling as she looked at them with horror. "She is a demon, a vampire! Oh God, help us."

"No!" he snapped, then forced himself to respond more calmly. "No. Nothing like that. She's no more a demon than you or I, and she's not a vampire. She doesn't take anything from me."

"You were willing to risk your career, risk going to jail to have her," Angie said. "I ... I was willing to do the same, even though I knew it would destroy my husband if he found out, and even though I knew I was damning my soul to hell."

"Love is so evil, then, that it damns you?" he asked softly.

"Adultery is."

He shook his head. "No, I don't think so. I think it's wrong, yes. It hurts your partner -- not so much that you had sex with someone else, but that you broke their trust. You promised them something, and then didn't keep your promise. That's what makes it so wrong. But it's not ... it's not murder. It's not on that level at all."

"It's a betrayal of a sacred trust," she said. "And to do it with another woman ... a young girl who was entrusted to me, who came to me for help ... Yes, it damns me."

"I'm not saying it was right, Angie. Not at all. You made a vow to your husband, and you didn't keep it. That was wrong. As to the homosexuality ... I can't see why love is wrong, no matter what the sexes involved are. And as for her coming to you for help..." He sighed. "Angie, do you realize that you wouldn't have harmed her in the slightest if you had just been nice to her after you had sex with her? It was sending her away that's hurting her."

She didn't really seem to be listening to him. "She's not human," she said, and he could hear the belief in her voice. "That's why I couldn't resist her, isn't it?"

"That's part of it. The other part is that you fell in love with her the first time you saw her. She doesn't make you want her, Angie. All she does is..." He hesitated, groping for words. "She lets you feel how she feels about it. And now that she knows, she can control it, at least somewhat. What you felt was your desire and her desire, both, if that makes sense."

She leaned her head on her hands and groaned. "I don't know what to do. I don't know what to think. What is she then, if she's not a succubus?"

"I'm not sure yet. I've run across a couple of things that sound similar, but nothing that fits exactly yet. I think she's what spawned the legends of succubi. Imagine living your entire life, needing sex, not knowing why, causing men to lust after you like that ... in the Dark Ages. It must have been hell."

"Mark ... I'm not a man," she said. "And I'm not gay, really I'm not. It's not just denial, it's truth. I never even thought about it."

He nodded. "That's the thing with life-bonds, from what I've been able to find out," he said. "When they're there ... they just are. It doesn't matter if you're straight or gay, whether you want to love them or not. You don't have a choice."