Chapter 64

"You look pensive," Krissi said Monday when they got together for lunch. They were in a small restaurant southwest part of town, away from the other students at the University. The clientele en were mostly people in their 30s and 40s, with a sprinkling of gray-haired seniors.

"I've been doing some thinking," Devlin replied. Today she was dressed in business attire: black slacks, a white blouse, and 'sensible' dark blue pumps. Krissi's dress was equally conservative: a dark blue pencil skirt and a white blouse. Her shoes, though, were flats. And she'd pulled her hair back in a ponytail.

"Thinking?" Krissi asked. "That's always dangerous."

"I'm such a slut. Do I really deserve someone like Evan?"

Krissi sighed. "What is it this time?"

"Yesterday, when we were hugging and kissing, and saying we loved each other?"

"Yeah?"

"I was hugging and kissing him, and I realized that the night before I'd had sex with five different guys. That's such a slutty thing."

"You're in the lifestyle—" Krissi began.

"I am, but he isn't. He probably thinks of me as this nice, quiet, maybe even virginal girl, and—"

"Not in this day and age," Krissi snorted. "Most gals who get married have already had their wedding night, if you know what I mean. If it wasn't their future groom, then it was some other lucky guy. I saw a statistic that the average girl has had sex with at least one guy other than her future husband by the time she walks down the aisle. And from the numbers in the article, it was closer to two different guys."

"And some of us have had sex with a couple hundred guys before that happy day," Devlin said. "I severely skew the curve, you know what I mean. I was with five guys at Emma's. There was Jesse, Vince, some other guy whose wife wanted me to drip his come into her mouth—"

"I've heard of that," Krissi said, interrupting her. "It's called sperm-swapping. I've tried it a couple of times, but I think I'd only do it again with somebody I liked." She put her hand on Devlin's wrist and smiled. "It's kind of an intimate moment."

"Yeah, well she wanted it, so I did. It felt a little funny because she was looking right up at my sex, but she didn't come on to me other than that. Anyway, there was that guy, Jesse, Vince, and those two guys we shared."

Krissi grinned. "That was pretty wild. I'm sorry for bailing on you, but I just got too sore down there to continue. I needed some therapeutic time in the hot tub."

"Yeah, and while you were doing that, I had them both. Krissi, that's five guys. That's not exactly 'pure and virginal'. I saw my panties when I got back to the apartment; they were such a mess that I ended up throwing them out."

"You're the only one I know who does something like that," Krissi said, shaking her head. "Most gals throw them in the wash. You must go through a fortune in underwear."

"What am I going to tell Evan? Do I really deserve somebody like him?"

Krissi stared at the sandwich in front of her. "I'm getting a little tired of this," she said finally. "For the last few months that's all I've heard. You're dead set on telling him, aren't you?"

"Uh huh."

"All right, you're going to do that. Have you picked the one time to do it that'll make him reject you?"

"What?"

"Are you trying to push him away?"

"No! I love him, and I want to marry him."

"You sure have a funny way of going about it."

"But—"

"As far as I can tell, you're going to get him alone, it'll be the last time you'll see each other for at least a month, and you'll tell him, 'Evan, I'm a slut who goes to sex parties, I was at one just the other night, and I fucked six or seven guys, I don't really remember how many because they all sort of blur together. And, no, you can't have any until we're married, but until then I'm going to fuck as many other guys as I want.' And then he'll get on the plane two minutes later, and have an entire cross-country flight to think about it. What do you think he'll do after that? He'll push you away, and he'll do it because he'll think you lied to him."

"That's crazy. I'd never do that."

"Bet you will." She dug in her purse and took out her wallet. "Bet you $20."

"Krissi—"

Krissi looked away.

"Krissi, it's not like that."

"Of course not," Krissi said. "It's never like that. And if you expect me to believe that, I've got a large bridge to sell you. Or how about a canyon? I understand the Federal Government is having a 'used canyon' sale. Just one owner, a little old lady who only visited it on Sundays."

"You think I shouldn't tell him."

"No, I've changed my mind. You need to tell him, if only because it'll establish that level of trust between you that a couple needs."

"Now you've confused me," Devlin said after a bit.

"No, you just haven't heard my idea."

"Which is?"

"Give up the lifestyle. Maybe not right now, this exact moment, but pick a date for your last visit to Emma's. Make it a memorable one, a visit you'll tuck away in that diary of yours so you'll be able to remember it years from now. But after that, no more guys, not until you're married, and then it'll only be Evan."

"But how will that—?"

"That way," Krissi continued, talking over Devlin, "you can tell him it's something you did in the past, but don't do now."

"What'll I do in the meantime? I'll explode. I need the male attention."

"The same thing most women do: go without, or play with your toys and fingers. I'll be there for you; guys don't seem to have a problem with two women getting together. In fact a lot of them seem to find it arousing. And like I said, you'll always have your toys and memories."

"But..." Devlin's voice trailed off as she thought about that. "But all of my friends..."

"After you're married, the two of you are moving to Oakland or Sacramento, or wherever he's playing, right?" Devlin nodded. "Good. You'll still have your friends, but you won't be in day-to-day contact with them, and that'll reduce the chance that you'll stray."

"But what about... what'll he think about my past?"

"That it was in your past, something that happened after Jeff, and before the two of you got serious. Guys'll buy that. As long as you're not doing it, and you let him think that he had such an effect on you that you changed your whole life, he'll go for that. It'll feed right into his male ego."

"But..."

"Trust me on this," Krissi said, putting her hand on Devlin's. "I may not understand guys much more than any woman does, but I know a little, or at least more than you. If you're dead set on telling him, this is the best way."

"But... but... what'll I tell him about Danny?"

"Nothing, absolutely nothing. If you mention Danny and Sue at all, call them friends and neighbors, and mention how you found and talked Sue into that surgery. Never, ever, mention Danny in any other way."

"But—"

"That isn't for you," Krissi went on, "that's for Sue and Danny. If you say anything, anything at all, it'll get Danny into all sorts of trouble. Do the words Statutory Rape mean anything to you at all?"

"But I slept with him willingly!"

"That's not how the courts would see it. Danny would be arrested and his whole life ruined. You don't want that, do you?"

"No," Devlin said in a small voice, "I guess not."

"I didn't think so."

"Do you really think I can keep myself sane without going to Emma's?"

"It'll be tough," Krissi said, "but think of it as doing something for the future you and Evan will have together. I'll be there for you, don't worry."

"If you say so." Devlin saw the shoulder strap through the white of Krissi's blouse. "You're wearing a bra today. When did you start doing that? Or have my lectures on supporting the girls had some effect."

"My boobs felt really tender this morning," Krissi said. "I couldn't bear to have anything rubbing nipples, so I wore a bra. And don't give me that look," Krissi added. "I'm not pregnant."

"Tender breasts are one of the signs."

"Saturday night was the first time I was with a guy since my last period. My breasts often get sensitive just before my period, you know that. That's probably why you're so blue. Our periods usually start within a day of each other, and yours is due."

"Yeah, I know. Are you sure, though?"

"I'm sure. Before Saturday night, the last time I was with a guy was seven weeks ago. I went up to Chicago and Steve and I did a weekend long bed crawl."

"And you had your period in between."

Krissi nodded. "My little friend came calling right on time, 27 days ago. I'm as regular as clockwork, as regular as you. Only I don't get depressed the last couple of days before my period." She snorted in amusement. "At least neither of us gets nasty."

"Yeah, that's a good thing. One of the gals on my floor in the dorm said they called it PMS because Pre-Meditated Homicidal Fury didn't roll off the tongue very well."

"I'll have to use that sometime," Krissi laughed. "I'm not so sure about calling it 'pre-meditated'. It's not like we plan on having our periods."

"There were a couple of girls on my floor who used PMS as an excuse not to do anything, whether it was turning in a paper for a class, or saying no to a guy. In their case 'that time of month' seemed to last about four weeks out of every month."

"It probably never occurred to them that they were giving the rest of us a bad name." Krissi toyed with her sandwich, pulling off the crust and pinching off small bites. "Seriously, you should probably pick a date and make that your last visit to Emma's. It'd better be soon, too. You don't want to do it after Evan asks you to marry him."

"Will you continue to go?" Devlin asked after a bit.

"No, I'll be here in town for you. I should be tapering off my visits for exactly the same reason."

"Yeah, but you'll still have Steve."

"Maybe."

"What?" Devlin straightened in surprise. "Are you two having problems?"

"We're... not talking very much," Krissi said. "Yesterday at the ballpark was the best it's been in some time."

"In some time? But I thought you were seeing him regularly in Chicago."

"Sort of. I've had some book signings, and American Booksellers, that was why I was out of town two weeks ago. I was supposed to go up to Chicago, but I can't pass up American Booksellers."

"Why not?"

Krissi sighed. "It's about the biggest event of the year. I had a booth, just like John Saul, John Grisham, Tami Hoag, and others who are at the top of the NY Times Bestseller list. I did nothing but smile, talk, autograph books, look pretty, and hobnob with people in the publishing industry. The whole idea is to be a 'presence', a real person, not just a face on the back cover of a book."

"Does it increase your sales or something like that?" Devlin said.

Krissi nodded. "Look at John Saul. He started doing that, and pretty soon his books were in the front of bookstores, right where you would see them when you came in. And Gresham... his books get put on prominent display at the news stands in airports, right where you can snatch them up just before boarding a plane. Those impulse purchases shoot your sales numbers right through the roof; that has a major impact on the next book deal you sign. And those are just two that I met. John Saul had a booth right across from me. He's really an interesting guy. Why, do you know he writes 70-80 page outlines for each novel? No wonder his stories are so tightly written!"

"Don't you?"

Krissi snorted. "I make a few notes, and I have a file with bits and pieces about the characters, and a list of major events, but that's it. The only ones I outline are the Rose stories."

"I hope you looked your best. That would mean dressing up."

"My publisher took me to this place in New York where I got a complete facial and a hair makeover that I absolutely hated. They wanted the 'wholesome, clean-cut' look, and by golly they got it. I was in a conservative suit every day. And yes, before you ask, that included nylons and a bra." She laughed. "I wonder what they would have said if they could have seen me Saturday night."

"I know you had fun after we parted, but you didn't say much about it."

"That's because you fell asleep on the way home from the game. If you recall, I did the driving after we got back to Emma's."

"Yeah, sort of. So what happened?"

"I learned about bukkake," Krissi said. "You suck a guy, or do him in some way, and then he comes on your face. Only you don't wipe it off, you sort of parade around with it."

"I know what it is," Devlin said with a nod. "That's normal for some guys. I've lost track of how many guys have come on my boobs, and I'm always getting it in my hair." She flicked at the ends of her hair. "It really shows up in dark hair. That's why I'm always washing my hair on Sunday mornings."

"Yeah, your girls are a come magnet." Krissi shook her head. "This was different. The guys I hooked up with are seriously into this. There were four of them, and I took turns sucking them off. When each one came he'd shoot all over my face. I didn't clean up after any of them, either. Apparently that's part of the appeal."

"So you had it dripping all over you."

"It was all over my face, my boobs, in my hair, everywhere. That would have been some publicity shot."

"It'd be great for your 'Rose' stories."

"Yes it would," Krissi said, smiling. "They could get a close-up of all of the come on my face, and the way it matted my hair. It would have been better if I had darker skin and hair so their stuff would stand out more. Anyway, they wanted to do it again, but I told them I had to pee, and used the opportunity to clean up. God, I was an absolute mess, and it took two washings before my hair didn't smell like come. I like giving blow-jobs, but not as a steady thing; I have a much better place to put a cock, one that gives me pleasure, too."

"That whole thing sounds a little weird," Devlin said. "But different folks..."

"... different strokes," Krissi finished. "Personally I think it's an ego thing for the guy. Here's this woman, you've just come all over her face, and she shows it off, proving what a big stud you are, and it kind of humiliates her because all she did was pleasure you, and didn't get that much pleasure out of it herself."

"Is there a comparable one for women?" Devlin asked, smiling.

"I don't think so," Krissi said after some thought. "Guys have a thing about their come. Look at how many want to look at pictures of it in the movies."

"Marie said that was to prove to the audience that the guy had come. Somebody at her studio did a study, and apparently guys who masturbate in theaters like to come at the same time as the guy on the screen. It's some sort of psychological transfer thing. You see it, and you fantasize that that's you up there on the screen."

"That gets a bit deep for me," Krissi said. "That doesn't mean I won't think about it, but not right now."

"Didn't we meet right after your shower?" Devlin asked. "I know you smelled freshly scrubbed."

"Nah," Krissi said. "After I got cleaned up, I found a guy who wanted to do it the regular way. I can't tell you how good that felt. I needed it! He was a bit tired, so he lasted and lasted." She hugged herself, smiling. "That was all right with me. I popped at least twice before he was done."

"You just reminded me of this one night at Emma's," Devlin said. "This was before we met."

"Back when you and Danny used to go."

Devlin nodded. "I had just gone up a cup size; I was now a D cup, proud of it, and wanting to show the girls off. And it seemed like every guy I met wanted to come on them. By the end of the night I was so horny I could barely think straight. I didn't get any relief until a couple of days later. Danny and I did it three times that night, and that didn't count my spending some time with my vibrator after I got home."

Devlin sighed, stirring her coffee. "But the next time I was at Emma's I wanted to cut loose. I met this guy... it was a typical couple who are new to the lifestyle, and hadn't thought it all out yet. He'd just realized that he could have sex with as many women as he wanted, and he hasn't realized that the same thing applied to his wife."

"They usually don't last," Krissi said. "I think that on average they show up three times. The first time he's eager, and she's reluctant. The second time he's really eager, and she's liking the whole idea, though she's still a bit cautious."

"And the third time she can't wait to go, and that bothers him." Devlin nodded. "Guys don't mind acting the super stud, but they seem to have a problem with their wives acting the super slut. That was sort of the case with this guy. Of course what made it special was that he got really turned on, and..."

#

"God, you're tight," the man muttered as he pushed. His cock slid farther into her. Devlin bit her lip. He was almost too big. His cock was thick enough she couldn't get her fingers all the way around it. It was average in length, though, which helped.

He pulled back and thrust again, lodging more of his hardness in her. He shifted his weight, putting his hands next to her shoulders and holding himself above her. She raised her legs to make it easier—one of the women at a previous party had taught her that particular trick—and hooked them on his hips. This time he thrust all the way in, and she could feel his balls nudge her bottom.

"You are so hot," he said in a low voice. He paused, sweat beading his forehead.

She thought of moving—she really wanted to move—but held still, recognizing how close he was. Finally he drew back slightly, took a steadying breath, and smiled at her. After a few more seconds he thrust much harder than before, making her whole body shake. He looked so much like one of her teachers—his face was different, but his body had the same build—that she fantasized about him. It wasn't like she'd ever let herself get into a position where she would do it with a teacher, but a girl could have her fantasies.

She smiled as he began to move regularly. She knew there were girls from her high school, girls she knew, who were nerving themselves up to do it with a boy. They were getting hot and bothered, and would go home with their panties wet, and have erotic dreams. Some might even finger themselves when they were alone in their room. And here she was, living what they were only dreaming. Only this was with a man, not a boy, with a man's muscles, and more important, a man's cock, and a man's knowledge.

She began to move, matching his strokes with thrusts of her own. She ran her hands up his arms, and then caressed his chest and shoulders. He had all of this strength, and right now it was focused on their pleasure. She'd turned him on—they'd met in the shower where she'd played with his cock and he'd licked her clit—and her body was driving him toward his peak. What she didn't tell him was that thought, and the friction of his cock in her passage, was getting her all worked up, too.

One thing led to another, and he pushed her beyond her limits. She cried through a climax. He must have felt her pussy trying to milk his cock. He shifted to short strokes, and while she was still coming down from that moment she felt his body stiffen. He groaned, and she felt a feathery touch deep inside her as his jets of come bathed her insides. Then he collapsed, but not quite across her; he'd managed to catch himself on his elbows.

"Wow," he said when he caught his breath. "That was... that was... wow."

"Yeah," she said, smiling. She ran her hand tenderly across his cheek. "That was really good."

He kissed her, surprising her. "I can't believe how tight you are."

"I exercise every day," she said. "Including those muscles."

"It was everything I could do to not come when I put it in." He shifted, his cock sliding out of her. He settled in next to her, his hand caressing her still heated skin. "You look so young."

"Well thank you," she replied. "I work very hard at that."

"You remind me of my teenage daughter," he said. "I can't say that about any other woman here."

"It's just make-up and a lot of work," she replied. "How old is your daughter?"

"She's 15, almost 16." He chuckled. "I've seen her in a bikini that left almost nothing to the imagination, and when I saw you I kind of fantasized about her."

"There's nothing wrong with a fantasy," Devlin replied, "provided that's all it is." She wondered if she knew the girl. If she was 15, almost 16, then they were the same age. "What high school does she go to?"

"Lowpoint-Washburn High," he said.

She forced a smile. That was her high school. "Well, good luck to her. I hope she studies hard. I know a lot of girls really get into dating, and let their schoolwork slide."

"Fortunately she doesn't appear to have done so," he replied. He slid his hand up her body and caressed her breasts. "Are you up for another one?"

"Um, perhaps. The question is, are you?"

"There's only one way to find out." He slipped his finger between her legs and began rubbing gently.

"Keep doing that and I'll get off without you."

"I was sort of counting on that."

#

"And did you?" Krissi asked.

"It was the usual," Devlin said. "He rubbed me off. I sucked him hard, and then we went at it again."

"What about his daughter?"

"I had to get his name from Emma. I couldn't tell her why I wanted it, though. It turned out that the guy's daughter and I shared two classes: English, and P.E. Our school had an open shower in the Girl's Locker Room, so I got a look at her naked. There wasn't that much resemblance."

"Did you get to know her?"

"Not really," Devlin said, shaking her head. "We didn't move in the same social circles, and anyway, what could I say? 'I've seen your Mom do it with some guy, and your Dad and I have gotten it on.'? Not hardly. We didn't share any more classes, either, for which I was grateful. The last thing I wanted to do was meet her parents."

"Did they get divorced or something?"

"I think they went through a bad patch," Devlin said, "but they got out of the lifestyle, and from the gossip I heard, they stayed married, but it was touch and go for a while."

"That just proves that people shouldn't get involved in the lifestyle unless their relationship is rock solid," Krissi said.

"There are parts of it that I think are beneficial," Devlin said, "especially for a woman. I have this theory that every woman, at least once in her life, should let herself go. She should be as wanton as she can, be a goddess of lust at least once in her life. It may frighten her so much she never does it again, but secretly, down in her heart of hearts, she'll always have that one time when men lusted after her, and she could take or leave them without any worry for the consequences."

"A lot of women think about it," Krissi said. "They don't actually go through with it, though. After all, girls who do are sluts. A woman, excuse me, a lady, shows more control." She scowled. "Personally, I think that idea was implanted in women's heads by some man. After all, a woman should be a slut, but only with one man. She should fulfill his wildest fantasies, but only with him."

"And that way the man will know any babies they make will be his."

"Something like that," Krissi said. "Birth control has had a profound impact on society, and we're nowhere near the final outcome of that revolution. But back to 'ladies'. A woman isn't supposed to have the same sex life a man does, but that was because a woman could get pregnant. Instead, most women live that kind of life vicariously by reading a hot romance, which is where I come in."

"You never thought you'd be doing a public service, did you?"

"God, no!" Krissi laughed. "I just wanted to tell stories... and get paid for doing so is a bonus. Anyway, these women get the thrill of doing something absolutely wanton, but without any of the consequences, or having to explain to their male partner where they were that night. That's what the heroine goes through, and the reader can have the worldview foisted on her by society confirmed by the rest of the story."

"You know, since I met you, I haven't been able to read a Romance novel."

"Neither have I," Krissi said, "at least not for enjoyment. When I read one it's research to see how the author did things."

"So... back to what we were talking about. Are you and Steve having problems?"

"I think so," Krissi said softly. "I'm going up there this weekend, and I want to turn it into a seriously romantic weekend. I'm not talking sex, I'm talking everything but that."

"That reminds me of something I learned from Sue," Devlin said. "She told me that a woman who has to rely upon her body to keep her man is doing a poor job of it."

"I've heard much the same thing," Krissi said. She waved her hand. "That's why this weekend is so important. I'm going to try to lure him back without taking him to bed.

"Now, back to you. Like I said, pick a date that'll be the last time at Emma's, and stick to it. I'm serious about this, Devlin."

"Yeah, I know. And it makes sense."

"But will you do it?"

"Let me think about it," Devlin said, sighing.

"Don't think about it too long, or you'll miss the opportunity."

"Yeah, yeah. Like I said, I'll think about it."

After lunch Devlin was driving back to the apartment when her cell phone rang. She thought, she hoped it might be Evan. She was almost disappointed when it was Denise O'Connor.

"Doing anything for lunch?" Denise asked.

"I just had lunch with a girlfriend," Devlin replied. "But I wouldn't say no to a cup of coffee. What's up?"

"I have a favor to ask of you," Denise said. "Where can we meet?"

"I'm on the south side of town," Devlin said. "You could pick me up at my apartment. I'll be there in about 20 minutes."

"I think I have the address somewhere here. Ah, here we go." She read it off. "Is that it?"

"That's it," Devlin said. "I'll wait for you outside."

"I'll see you then," Denise said.

The day was warm, and Devlin had just settled down on a bench to enjoy it when Denise pulled up. Reluctantly Devlin walked over to her friend's car. Denise, though, parked the car and got out. "No sense in being inside on a day like this," she said.

"There's a patio in the courtyard," Devlin said. "It's not exactly private, but there's a garden and a fountain, and, all in all, it's reasonably private."

The patio had several tables that were in the shade. Denise, after taking a seat, dug a sheaf of papers out of her purse. "I had these made up earlier today. They're pictures of the guy I'm after. I wondered if you could pass them around, or even post them so people could see them."

Devlin nodded as she took them. Then she froze. She recognized the guy. He was the guy from Saturday night, the one where his wife wanted to have his come drip into her mouth. After a second Devlin swallowed and smiled.

"I'll pass these around."

Denise smiled her thanks. "He claims he's married," she went on, "but we have information that his 'wife' is really a hooker that he's hired to be his 'wife' at these parties. We don't know who it is, though. If we can find her, maybe we can persuade her to testify."

Devlin nodded, hoping it hid her reaction. She was going to have to call Emma right away, and get herself checked out, too. Emma would get the word out, and everyone who'd been at the party would have to get tested.

She and Denise talked a bit more before parting. The moment she was back in her apartment, Devlin called Emma and let her know.

"How do I tell Denise O'Connor that I recognized the guy because I had sex with him?" Devlin asked at the end. "She'll want to know the details."

"I'll think of something," Emma said. "One or two of the people who come to the parties may be able to help out. Your name won't ever come up."

"All right. Call me and let me know what I should do."

She hung up, and then dialed the clinic on campus. They had an opening in the late afternoon and could work her in. When she got back to the apartment—thankfully the tests were all negative—the message light was blinking on her phone. Thinking it might be Emma, she punched the button to play it.

"Devlin! It's Evan! Guess what! I barely got back to my apartment here in Sacramento before the phone rang. The big club was so impressed with what I did in Chicago that they didn't send me back down! I think I'll be in the bullpen, maybe for long relief, and the occasional spot start. I'm to report tomorrow. Give me a call!"

She grabbed her cell phone and hit the speed dial. Suddenly the whole day seemed brighter.

Afterward she had to call Krissi. When she told Emma she got a surprise.