Chapter 1

So here's how it started. It was my sophomore year at UC Davis. Classes were going all right but everything else was boring as hell. My roommate was cool, but he spent most of his time with his girlfriend. My chief social activity was playing computer solitaire. Finally, I decided enough was enough. I bought a deck of actual playing cards.

Yes, I know it was lame. It turned out pretty cool, though, because I bought the deck at this old junk shop. They were tied up in a black silk ribbon. They seemed really old and I swear they were hand painted. The queens were all stacked and had this strange, horny look on their tiny faces, though it certainly wasn't pornographic and I don't think most people would have even noticed. The only obviously lewd thing was the Joker. There was a noticeable bulge in his pants and he seemed to be trying to thrust his pelvis right out of the card.

I paid the 5 bucks the junk shop was asking and took them home. It made my time wasting feel a little more productive and I could lie down on the ground to do it. I might have wasted the rest of my life that way if Heidi's cousin Gilly hadn't come to town.

Heidi was Jake's girlfriend. Jake was my roommate. Gilly was hot! Even hotter than Heidi!

And Jake actually suggested I go out with them so Gilly didn't feel like a third wheel, God love him! She didn't seem terribly interested in me but she was polite enough about it and I figured after a few drinks she might even start to like me.

Unfortunately, the bar we usually go to had gotten fined the week before for letting in kids with fake i.d.'s and the bouncer caught ours. Three more bars and three more rejections. It sucks being 20.

But not totally. Jake suggested we go back to our apartment, where he had a bottle of vodka. Good ol' Jake. When Gilly asked what we could do their, I remembered my deck. I said we could play cards and everybody thought it was a great idea!

Back at the apartment, Jake made a pitcher of screwdrivers and I got out my deck. I slipped the Joker into my shirt pocket and impressed the girls with my shuffling skills. I had already spent a lot of time with that deck. Heidi wanted to play hearts but Gilly suggested penny-ante poker and Jake and I voted for that. I dealt the cards and sipped at my screwdriver. Jake had made them plenty strong. I tipped my glass to him in salute and he grinned back. I hoped the girls wouldn't notice how strong they were and get good and tipsy. Drunk girls make me horny.

There was this warm buzzing on my chest. It was coming from my pocket, where I had stashed the Joker. It was odd but it only lasted for a moment. When I looked up, everyone was looking at the hands I had dealt them. The girls were both absentmindedly gulping down their drinks. I raised my eyebrows and completely ignored my hand.

"These are really good, baby!" Heidi told Jake.

"Yeah!" said Gilly. "Can I get another before we start the game?"

"Uh, sure," said Jake.

"Get me one too, hey Gilly?" said Heidi.

I gulped my own drink. It was like a dream come true. And Gilly's ass looked great as she went for more liquor, at least until Heidi kicked my shin and wagged her finger at me in amused reprimand.

We played a couple rounds and the girls kept drinking like lushes. I had never known Heidi to get totally wasted, but I thought maybe it was her cousin's influence. Heidi won the first hand and Gilly won the second. Jake and I were a little distracted by the hot girls getting drunk in our room. When the girls asked for a third screwdriver each, we downed ours so as not to appear light-weights.

The girls got really giggly and they started loosing. I laid down a straight and wished we were playing strip poker.

"Hey! We should play strip poker!" declared Gilly.

"Yeah!" said Heidi. "I was juss thinkin' that!"

"I was thinking that too, babe," said Jake. "And I think you just lost that hand. What you gonna take off?"

The shirt, I thought. Please, the shirt!

Heidi giggled.

"I'm gonna take off my shirt!" she declared, and shucked off her black blouse, twirled it over her head and threw it in the corner.

I gulped my drink and tried not to ogle Heidi's tits there in her tiny white lace bra. I hoped Jake wouldn't notice that I was getting hard over his girlfriend.

The warm buzzing came again in my pocket. I had felt it just before Gilly had suggested strip poker and before Heidi took her shirt off as well. And I had wished for both things just before that! I took another gulp of my drink and allowed myself a tiny smile. I wished for Gilly to loose the next hand.

Jake dealt the cards. Gilly discarded three.

"Oh fuck!" she said, when she saw her new hand. "I can't believe I gave away three kings for this shit! I mus be drunk!"

Heidi giggled.

"I don' know how," she said. "There'sss harly any alkahol in these theens. <hip!>"

Hurry up and take your shirt off, I thought at Gilly. The Joker buzzed.

"Well, I losss this han fer sure!" Gilly announced, throwing down her cards and pulling off her top.

Now, by this time I was almost sure that the Joker in my pocket was magic and that all my fantasies were coming true. I decided to go with it.

"It's hardly fair that you girls get to count your bras as an article of clothing," I said. "After all, we don't have anything under our shirts."

Gilly tossed her head back and laughed. Heidi gave me an amused 'I can't believe you said that' look.

Agree with Bill and loose the bras I thought as hard as I could.

The Joker buzzed.

"Iss only fair," Gilly observed, and reached back to unsnap her bra.

"Makes senssse to me," said Heidi and followed suit.

Jake was just grinning stupidly. I guess I was too. I shuffled and dealt with out looking at the cards. There were titties to ogle and no one seemed to mind.

I finally looked at my hand and it sucked. I was pretty sure I could still win with it, though. Or at least make sure one of the girls lost. I was trying to figure out which one to wish for when I realized I was being a dope. I closed my eyes and wished as hard as I could.

I wish these girls were horny as hell and wanted to fuck our brains out right now!

Gilly threw her cards down.

"I'm sick of poker!" she announced. "I wanna be poked! You up for the job, Bill?"

"Ooooo Yeah!" said Heidi. "I'm totally up for an orgy! How ya want me, Jakeey?

From Jake's dumbfounded look, I took it that Heidi didn't usually come on to him like that. Jake was the last of my concerns, though. Gilly was on her feet and headed for me.

"You wanna go to my bedroom?" I asked.

"Uh-uh," she said, shaking her head as she shimmied out of her tight jeans and thong panties. "Too far. I need it right here and right now!"

I started to unbutton my shirt but apparently I wasn't fast enough for her. She went straight for my pants, undid them, pushed me to the floor and pulled them off along with my shoes. She grinned wolfishly at my red boxer shorts and the flagpole searching for an exit.

"Oh yeah!" she exclaimed. "That's what I need!"

"Oh YES!" screamed out Heidi, apparently having gotten what she needed. Jake was frantically fucking her from behind as she bent over the arm of our couch.

I turned back to Gilly just in time to see her towering above me, pussy dripping, as she came down on her knees, grabbed hold of my cock, and guided it into paradise.

She put her palms just above my shoulder, wiggled her ass until she'd gotten my cock just where she wanted it, then licked me from my chin to my left ear.

"I'm gonna fuck your brains out!" she whispered.

I had never had my brains fucked out before. It's nice.

I woke up the next morning hung over. The girls and Jake were gone. I had almost convinced myself it was a dream when I noticed the lipstick smeared on my thigh. My eyes googled and a smile burned through the hangover. It had really happened!

But had I done it? With my mind? It sure seemed like they were doing exactly what I wished they would, but I had been pretty drunk. So had they, really. They might have just done it on their own. The fact that they were doing what I wished might have been a coincidence. After all, I wished things like that all the time. It had never come true before.

Then I remembered the tingling I had had in my pocket. The Joker. In my drunken state, I had been sure it was giving me psychic powers. Was it possible?

Only one way to find out. I grabbed my shirt. It was still their. It felt like a plain old card. I looked at it and for a second I thought it winked at me, but my eyes were still hurting with the hangover. I wasn't sure.

I got dressed and headed over to the math department. If I did have the power to influence women's mind, there was no doubt who was first on my list. Heather Kahl, the department's secretary. She was incredible, with long, curly blonde hair and a pair of legs to die for. She was always showing them off in these tiny, tight skirts but she had made it very clear that no student was going to get any where near them, let alone between them. God, could my Joker change that?

Apparently not. I came in and said hello. She was used to me coming by and she didn't mind too much. She liked me, just not in the way I wanted.

I focused on her, wishing she would kiss me. 'Kiss me', I thought. 'Kiss Bill. You want to kiss Bill. Kiss me.'

She stared at me.

"Something wrong with your face?" she asked.

'KISS ME!" I thought as loud as I could.

"You look like you need to pee," she observed.

"I, um, I just..." I stammered.

"You know where the restroom is," she said, mockingly. "Go. I have work to do."

"Sorry," I said, turning crimson and heading for the door.

She laughed as I fled.

"FUCK!" I yelled as I entered the men's room.

Some guy at the urinal turned sharply, spraying the wall, and scowled at me. I mumbled an apology and washed my face. God, I felt like such a geek. Of course the Joker wasn't magic. I was a delusional fool.

Unless...

What if it wasn't just the Joker? What if it was the whole deck? I was holding the Joker, but the girls were holding other cards. And I hadn't tried anything after they had put them down...

It called for another test. But not one as embarrassing as the one I had just attempted. I decided to skip my morning classes. I hurried back to the apartment and collected the deck. I made sure each one was there and wrapped them up with the black ribbon they had been bound with when I bought it.

The phone rang. It was my mom. I had forgotten I had promised I would come home for my little brother's birthday. I tried to weasel out of it, but she guilt-tripped me and soon I was on the road, making the drive back to Berkley. I brought the deck, of course, hoping I could find a way to test it back home.

My brother's birthday party was boring as hell. He didn't really want me there and I didn't want to be there. He was just biding his time to make it through mom's little party and get to the real party with his friends. Everyone there was family and I didn't really want to try out the deck on them, not that they were likely to want to play poker anyway. Once my brother and everybody left, I told mom I thought I would drive back to Davis, but she insisted that I stay the night. Finally, the true reason she had insisted I come came out. A couple of planks in the back porch had rotted out and she wanted me to replace them before her weekly bridge game Saturday afternoon.

I grumbled but agreed. I went to bed in my old room, a room where so many of my impotent fantasies had been hatched. I was sure I must be crazy, thinking one might come true.

But it would be so nice if it was... and some of my mom's friends were really hot... And since they were planning on playing cards anyway...

It was a pleasant thought and it helped me fall asleep.

I woke up early and hid mom's playing cards. Then I headed off to Home Depot and the stuff I would need to fix the back porch. I bought some paint for the railing as well. I wanted a good excuse to be back there while my mom's bridge club met. I had fantasized about Lori Sanchez since puberty. I really hoped it would work--and not just as a test.

The porch was fixed and the new boards stained before Mom even noticed her cards were missing. Luckily, my brother had told mom he was going camping, though more likely he was hung over in his best friend's basement at that time. I told my mother that he had probably taken her cards and she bought it. My brother is a bit of a shit.

"But I happen to have a deck," I told her. "You want to use mine?"

"Bill, you're an angel!" she said. "Not only did you fix the porch, you've saved my party!"

"Well, I don't know that I'd say 'angel'" I said with a naughty wink.

She laughed and swatted me.

"By the way, I noticed the paint job was looking a little shabby out on the railing. I got some paint for it and I thought I'd fix it up after I get some lunch. You don't think your bridge club would mind if I was out there while you're playing, do you?"

"Why Bill Hendry! I do believe college has matured you more than I ever could have hoped! So selfless!" she exclaimed. "Of course they wouldn't mind! They'll all be impressed by what a fine man you've grown into!"

That was precisely what I was hoping.

They all arrived a little after noon. There was Lori Sanchez with her long dark hair, luscious tanned legs, and a twinkle in her eye that seemed to say she had more exciting hobbies than bridge. Then came Bethany Winkle, an outspoken blonde from Boston, and Sara Jesop, a shy, unassuming brunette with a great set of hooters that never got any air time. If only the deck really worked, I was hoping to change that.

The ladies all greeted me, then went with my mom and my deck to the back porch. I let them get comfortable while I had a drink of water, then headed out there myself with a paint can and paint brush and the Joker in my shirt pocket. I made pleasantries to the card players and went to the far corner where I could see and hear them without making myself too obvious. Mom was dealing and then they were all holding their hands, sorting through their cards. It was time to figure out how my magic deck worked.

I concentrated on all four of them and thought 'Bridge is boring. You should play strip poker.'

"God, this is so boring!" my mom declared.

"We should play something exciting," Lori Sanchez suggested. "Like strip poker!"

"Yeah!" said Mrs. Winkle. "Now you're talking!"

Sara Jesop giggled nervously but nodded her agreement.

"Oh, that would just be perfect!" Mom said. "Except, well..."

She nodded her head in my direction.